September 1988

Gina is now known as Alpha Townsend--got handed the title just after my 20th birthday. Her friends jokingly call me Luna Henry. I really don't give a shit, personally. Not like I expected to take over the pack.

We are trying to not get pregnant, for now. It would be different if our genders were switched. Challenges to her title would be dangerous to our kids, and the worst challenges come in the first few years, before you prove yourself to your peers. The gamble would be far less once her Beta ascended, and he's all of 14, right now. He could take her challenge, by proxy, as long as he was willing to submit to her. They were cousins and he worships the gound she walks on, so it's pretty assured that he would be her champion when she needs one.

She also thinks that delaying having kids will reconcile me to my father. That's not something I'm even trying for.

All's gravy, at this point.

September 2001

My Goddess. America just witnessed planes flying into buildings that represent what we worship: consumerism. If it had just been destruction of property, the nation would still have been outraged, but it became personal to many as the loss of life mounted. I still can't wrap my mind around it.

The fragility of life was why I picked back up this old diary. We had twins a few years back, and we were feeding our toddlers breakfast when the news started on the planes. I couldn't imagine not having something to pass on to them if we weren't there.

A strange thing did happen last year. A request for data on how various mates met and came together as a couple was given out through the were's private site. I spent a ton of time updating that mess, for our pack, as I never had a damn thing to do before the kids were born. This mess would do perfectly for that request.

Then at the beginning of this year, they were testing human mates to see who had latent were genes, and working out whether they could be "turned"...or more accurately, have their genes fixed.

Apparently, I was only so human to begin with, which is why the former Luna and Mom were friends in the first place. Dad wasn't Mom's mate, though--he was thoroughly human, and Mom was considered a shiftless were...which was why I was classified as a human. They divorced about 3 years ago, when Mom found her mate.

Dad drank himself into a suicide not long after. We did reconcile, in the end, and he held his grandkids before he passed. Not much else to say about the man.

Anyway, we decided to go through with it, with me at the ripe old age of 33. It damn near killed me, but I made it through. The data they gathered from it has left them with the opinion that it's inadvisable to initiate a shift so late in life, so at least it's all good for science. I, on the other hand, needed heavy metals and mineral supplements for about 6 months after that.

Man, if I thought I was laid back, Maurice is worse. Yeah, your wolf is a personality that culminates from your life's experiences, just like your human personality, but where as your human mind is gathered together over time, the wolf is gathered from all that, in one instant. 33 years of life made me into a guy who was willing to follow behind a dominant mate and not feel a damn bit insecure about it. Muarice formed in a cradle of that level of life-satisfaction.

He adored his kids and wife, but I didn't notice him all that much unless we were getting it on. I'm finally starting to understand why men are called horndogs. The critters are practically pure sex. Just thought my mate was a nympho. Nope.

Between me and Maurice, Gina couldn't walk for damn near a week without a limp. Just told her that he was making up for lost time.

Shit, that was some data entry to record, trying to quantify the difference in sex pre and post wolf. And it was just in time, as like in humans, a female wolf's sex drive just increases until the body gives out from old age. Gina would never say it out loud, but she was starting to get bored, in spite the sparks.

I'm beginning to think all these Alphas retire early just so they can fuck their brains out in peace. I am certain that's what the wolf side is thinking.

One strange moment in all of this. Gina was sparring with the head warrior, and like most the time, even amongst the men...hell, I've seen it with human sports players: he patted her butt and congratulated her on a bruising round.

They've done this in front of me before. I knew what it was, and I knew whose bed she'd be in. Heck, he had a mate, and she didn't share for shit. She had no problem with it.

15 years, not a single problem with the behavior.

Maurice wasn't having it. This lazy ass wolf took over--I've never been shoved to the side in my own body before. The wolf shredded him up one side and down the other. Gina and her Beta had to pull me off of him before I killed his ass.

And you know how mates are supposed to calm each other? Gina tried. He had 15 years of me ignoring what a wolf would not, especially for a male wolf, and he was done.

It took her asking him if he was challenging her for the Alpha title to get him to crawl to the back of my aching head. Then he set out to howl in there for the next few hours--it was effectively a migraine. I retired to our room, and didn't come out until the next morning.

And Maurice just went back to passively hiding in the background of my mind, leaving me to smooth over everything, as if I was at fault.

I felt real bad for Tom--the head warrior. Sent him a bacon bouquet, stayed the hell out of his hospital room because I didn't want to cross Lana--his mate.

Gina I wasn't worried about, as I could just pick at her until we broke out in a bout of angry sex. We were both in the wrong, as it was. But even with a fight, I'd never doubt her or myself. This was a lifetime of commitment, before we even had the mind to understand what we were committed to.

~~~

Alpha Gina Townsend is the retired Alpha of Persimmon Village Pack, in South Carolina. "Luna" Henry Townsend is her mate.