For some bizarre reason, Phlegma decided that it was a good idea to give teenage girls flaming arrows. Especially with Ingrid around. I had to keep an eye on her in fear of looking down and getting an arrow in the back of my head. The goal of the lesson was to fire at a metal ring on a pole and light it with fire. Of course this was no where near what was actually happening. Sloppily fired arrows were flying toward the ring, each one missing, and guards in armor, holding shields and buckets of water, were putting out the small grass fires. We were going by groups and I was second to last, so it was going to be awhile. 

I'm laying down in the grass, picking at the blades above my head and staring at the sky, the ever growing clouds accumulating and covering up the blue. "It looks like it could rain any second now," I say, twisting a piece of grass around my finger. 

"Yeah, I'm hoping it holds out long enough for us to have a turn, since we've been waiting out here for hours," Ruff responds, sat beside me. 

"It's only been two hours," I counter.

"Exactly. That's two hours too long," she huffs, falling back into the grass with me. "I'm hungry. I want dinner," she complains. I roll my eyes at her whininess. "It's so humid out here too."

"I'm aware."

"Faylinn, you and Larkin are up!" Phlegma calls.

"We are half way now," I say optimistically. 

"Wooh," Ruff answers dryly, throwing her hands in the air, limply. 

"Don't hurt yourself with all the excitement. Wouldn't want you to pull a muscle before it's our turn."

"Don't insult me my flaxen haired friend." I roll my eyes again.

"Psst." I lift my head to see if Ruff made the noise, but she's still complaining, so no. "Psst." I glance around me. Jamie and Layla are making flower crowns. Camicazi is braiding Heather's hair. Dee, Macy and Raven look like they are asleep, and Ingrid is pouting. "Psst."

"Do you hear that?" I ask Ruff.

"Hear what?" 

"I don't know." I sit up, swiveling my head back and forth.

"Astrid."

"Did that bush just say your name?" Ruffnut asks, both of us eyeing it.

"So you heard that too?" I ask, picking up my bow, and arrow ready to fly. I check behind me to make sure Ingrid and Phlegma aren't watching before crouching and inching forward slowly. 

"Don't get eaten!" Ruff calls. 

I roll my eyes-- again. "Gee, thanks. That's helpful," I hiss at her. She just shrugs.

I'm a foot away from the bush, when a hand grabs me and pulls me around the side. I gasp, surprised, dropping the bow. When I'm steady, I punch him.

"Ow! What? Why?" 

"That's for scaring me. Need I remind you of the last time you scared me like that?"

"Fare point," he says, rubbing his arm.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"I wanted to see you."

"Oh." I blush, embarrassed. "Where have you been the last few days?" I ask, since the last time I saw him was at bath night.

"I've been busy," he says, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Busy....?" I repeat, crossing my arms and shifting my weight over my left leg.

"Yeah."

"With what?" I ask sweetly, smiling.

"With... practice and stuff. It's not important." 

"Then tell me, if it's not important."

"It doesn't matter. It has nothing to do with you." 

His words sting and my annoyance grows to anger. I will get him to tell me what he's so worked up about.

"I tell you everything!" I shoot back.

"Oh, everything, huh?" he asks, puffing out his cheeks. "Like how I'm not a man and I'm broken, right? You tell me stuff, like that?"

"That's what you're mad about? Really?" I ask, appalled. "I said I was sorry. It wasn't even me that originally said it."

"But you thought you'd go ahead and share it anyway, right?" I shut my mouth. "we both know you don't tell me everything ." The prince suddenly flashes in front of my eyes. He knows I've been spending time with him. I had gone looking for him last night, and Hiccup must have seen me on the stairs. But, I'm confused as to why he's so angry. I'm here to meet the prince, anyhow.

"I was gonna tell you about the prince. Nothing has happened. I've only talked to him twice. In the dark. I haven't even seen him," I explain, worried he hates me now.

"I know." I hold my breath. "But, that wasn't what I was talking about. You talk to him. About everything. The deep stuff. Why don't you tell me anything like that? I care about you. He doesn't even know you. Why trust a stranger with your feelings? Why not someone you're close too?"

"Well, technically, you were a stranger a little over a month and a half ago."

"But you know me now. And you still don't tell me anything. Not anything about what you're thinking or feeling. He's not special you know?" he spits, fuming.

"Yes he is," I defend.

"He's not a man. I can be a man if you need me to. He just weighs everything and everyone down. He's weak and pathetic. Like a curse cast over the palace. He'll never lead a kingdom."

"Yes he will. He has grand ideas."

"No. He has fantasies of grandeur. He's useless. Broken."

"He's my friend. Where is all of this coming from? What happened the last three days?" He turns his head away from me, glaring at the ground. "The Hiccup I know would never speak like that about anyone," I say, searching his face for answers. "Why don't you tell me anything? I'm your girlfriend. You're supposed to tell me stuff too." We both jump, shocked by the word. Girlfriend. We'd never said it out loud before. Was I even his girlfriend? I thought that's what's going on. But, maybe I'm wrong based on our reactions. "I mean friend. I'm your friend," I correct. "Why do you keep everything to yourself? You never tell me any of that stuff either!"

"Maybe because I don't want you to know about it!"

"But you have the right to be mad at me?" I argue. 

"I shouldn't have come," he says quietly. "this was a mistake."

"You're right. Maybe I shouldn't have come. At all. My life before was simple and everyone knew everybody and we worked together as one. Here it's chaos. Mean girls, depressed and broken princes and silly boys that chase a ball on a field, waisting my time and getting me in trouble. But, let me remind you, if you think this is all a mistake? Just remember you're the one that chased me down that day. Have a good life." and with that, I stomp away.

***

I was the only one able to light the ring. I did it on my second try. I think it was my rage that allowed me to have so much focus on one thing at once. The rain began falling shortly after. I stood there in the field, watching the flames lick at the dark clouds until the rain drops put its' light out and I trudged after the others.

I change out of my clothes, into my nightgown and flop down on my bed. 

"You ok?" Heather asks from her own bed. 

"Just tired," I say. I didn't tell them about my fight with Hiccup. I don't really know what happened between us. Things escalated too quickly to process. There's something he's not telling me. I could see it in his eyes that night at the spring. My mind flashes back to to that night. What happened before he arrived? What went down between him and the prince? I could tell that Ingrid's words sunk deep into his bones whether he will ever admit it or not. I wish he would just tell me. Maybe if we sat in a dark room, it would help him release it out into the open too. I think about going to find the prince, wanting to tell him about it. He wasn't upstairs yesterday. Then I think better of it. It's a good thing too, because right then, there's a thud on the window. 

I get to the window too quickly. Too hopeful for my liking. I seem desperate. It's pitch black outside, the rain pounding on the roof, streaming past the window pane. There's another thud, barely audible over the rain. I push the window up some, making sure not to wake the other girls. I see him instantly, his hair and clothes clinging to his skin, standing like a ghost and shaking from the rain. I push up the window the rest of the way. Luckily, the wind is blowing the rain to the left, so water doesn't get into the room. "Are you insane?!" I whisper-shout down to him.

"Can you come outside?' he asks, hugging himself.

"It's raining," I remind him. 

"I need to talk to you." I sigh and pull myself through. I stop a foot away from him, my heart slamming into my chest and I have to keep myself from clawing it out. "I'm sorry. I was stupid. I was angry with myself and my father, and I took it out on you. I was rude and inconsiderate and regret every second of it. I'm just confused about some stuff, and I'll tell you one day. But, you have to trust me that I'm ok and that it wont effect anything if you don't know yet. It's just something I'll have to take care of on my own. I'll give you clues, if clues are enough for now," he tells me, locking his eyes on me. I nod my head quickly. "It's about my past. It feels jumbled up and like it's missing something, and my father's really sensitive about it." I nod once in understanding, waiting for him to go on, but he doesn't. That's all he's saying about it. "I'm really sorry, Astrid. For hurting you. I'd never want to hurt you. That was never my intention.. I'd never wanna hurt you." And for some reason, I believe him, whole heartedly. And then I realize the scariest thing. That I would believe anything he says. Even if it was that he didn't love me anymore. I'd believe him. And I realized in that moment how connected we are. I am his and he is mine, even if we don't last, we are still each others. Like the stars and the night sky, forever together.  "Can you ever forgive me?" he asks, hopeful. His eyes are glassy, his hair stuck to his forehead, water dripping down his lashes and nose and cheeks and lips.

"Yes," I breath out. And then he does what I've waited so long for him to do. He kisses me. It's a frenzy of lips and rain and needing, and I've never felt closer to him than in this moment. My hands in his hair, his on my face. And I'm leaned back slightly from the force, but I don't mind, because right now... we are infinite.