sorry for not updating in forever, i was uninspired and oof. HTTYD3 Spoilers got me crying and Im still NOT ready for this final movie. Im not ready to let go. 

This one shot is about Hiccup letting astrid go, which means there's no real hiccstrid in this i guess. theyre just best friends at the age of 24 and 23.

im listening to adele - someone like you while writing this and i  a m  e m o t i o n a l

also there's ed sheeran lyrics in this "Thinking out loud" 

Enjoy reading (':

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Hiccup was standing in front of the mirror in his apartment, wearing a grey suit, white dress shirt and black tie. His hair still not quite tamed, but also not in its usual completely wild style. He sighed and looked around his apartment, noticing once again how lonely his life was. 

He wished he had had the guts to ask her out back in High School, but he missed his chance and now, 6 years after they left high school and she met him, he was invited to their wedding. He was angry at himself, for not having the guts to ask the love of his life out, but he was happy that she found her other half nonetheless. 

He just wished it was him she was marrying instead.

Hiccup checked his watch and turned, checking there was still food and water left in Toothless' bowls, then he fussed the cat's head gently and walked out of the door, getting into his car. He himself was still single, his heart still firmly attached to his best friend and long time crush. He knew he had to let her go, today at the very last, but it just hurt to think about it. Thinking that she will have a family of her own with someone that wasn't him. 

The young man had a girlfriend once, but that was a long time ago. They simply hadn't worked out, at least that's what Hiccup kept telling himself for the sake of his own sanity. 

Hiccup arrived two hours before everyone else did on her request. He walked inside and looked for her, he heard excited voices and saw her mother, who cheerily waved at him and wrapped him in a tight hug. Her parents were like family to him. Another thing that made it even more painful to know she'd get married to someone else today. 

The young man returned the hug, his long arms wrapping firmly around Ingrid Hofferson's back. She pulled back and rested a hand on his cheek, "I'm so glad you could make it," the words were spoken so quietly, Hiccup almost missed them, but he smiled sadly. 

Ingrid was well aware of the fact that Hiccup had a huge crush on her daughter. She knew it since both were just little kids. The way the young man looked at her daughter left little room to interpret anything else. She wondered greatly why he never asked her out, the two of them would have made the perfect couple. 

The older Hofferson was still happy for her daughter, though, for she seemed to have found the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. 

Ingrid led him to a room and Hiccup felt his breath hitch, seeing her there, her wedding dress hung up and looking beautiful as ever. Her long, blonde hair was just being braided and Hiccup had to peel his eyes off her to avoid anyone noticing him staring at the young woman that was about to get married. 

Astrid had her eyes closed as her mother and mother-in-law resumed braiding her hair. Hiccup just stood there, watching and feeling oddly out of place. He always felt like he belonged with the Hoffersons; Astrid, her mother and her father, but right now, here in this small room where Astrid was being prepared for her big day, he felt like he didn't belong, not anymore. 

After a few more minutes of braiding, the two women were done and Astrid opened her eyes, looking at her reflection in the mirror. Her beautiful, blue eyes lit up as she saw him, and a smile stretched over her lips. Hiccup couldn't help but smile as she got up and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him firmly. 

"Hey you."

"Hey"

He had no clue why he was whispering, but he didn't trust his voice not to break when he spoke a little louder. She slowly pulled away, her hands still around his waist and his on her shoulders. Her smile was shy and she was obviously nervous and before Hiccup was able to stop himself he whispered "you look beautiful." 

"Thank you" 

Everyone in that room knew that Hiccup and Astrid were inseparable. They were friends since at least 20 years after all. Hiccup removed his arms from her shoulders and let them drop to his sides trying not to look too defeated, his heart aching. Astrid gestured for him to sit down on the sofa in the room, which he did, opening the buttons of his jacket and slightly loosening his tie.

The bride sat back down as well and talked to him while there was some light makeup applied to her face. "Have you brought someone along?"

"Huh? Me? Oh, no... I didn't" 

That caused her to look at him, his defeated tone bringing out the worry in her expression. Hiccup mentally kicked himself for bringing the mood down, even though the didn't mean to. 

"I mean, I would've brought Toothless, but I doubt he'd be welcome," he tried to joke and it worked. Astrid chuckled lightly, making his heart swell.

Hiccup leaned forward and put his hands together, watching as Astrid was prepared and just talking to her like in good old times.

Two hours went by way too fast and Hiccup found himself shooed out of the room as Astrid was putting on her dress. He sighed, put his hands in his pockets and started walking to where their other friends were. Heather, Fishlegs, Snotlout, Tuffnut and Ruffnut all greeted him with hugs and pitying expressions. 

Even they knew. 

Then they went inside the church to take their positions, the girls as bride maids and the boys as best men. The ceremony itself was painful for Hiccup to watch, seeing Astrid in her beautiful dress. Her father guiding her to the altar where her fiancee was waiting, beaming proudly. Hiccup looked away as Neil took her hand and told her how beautiful she was, questioning if it really was that good of an idea to even attend the wedding in the first place. 

But he wouldn't miss his best friend's wedding. 

The bells of the church rang as the newly weds made their way out, Hiccup and the others following behind. He lightly winced as he felt a hand rest on his shoulder as he watched Astrid and her husband being embraced by family and friends. He turned his head to see Heather.

"I know this must be hard for you, Hiccup, but..." she hesitated, obviously trying to find the right words, "...she's happy and I know that's all you ever wanted for her." 

The auburn haired young man smiled sadly, "yeah..." 

Then it was his turn to congratulate the two, he shook her Neil's hand and smiled wishing him and her nothing but the best. Then he turned to Astrid and was instantly embraced in another tight hug, which he instantly returned. 

They pulled away and smiled at each other, and if she wasn't married Hiccup would've kissed her there and then. He then stepped back and let everyone else do their thing, making his way to their car, since he had the honor of driving bride and groom to the cove, where they would be celebrating. 

He didn't need to wait long, as both jumped into his car only minutes later. They were giggling and laughing with each other, sharing kisses as Hiccup carefully inspected them through the mirror. They arrived after a 30 minute drive and the newlyweds jumped out of the car happily, Hiccup following them and looking around. Everything was beautifully decorated and Hiccup once again wished it was his wedding with Astrid, but he didn't have much time to think about it as Astrid set him a task, which he fulfilled dutifully. 

More of the guests arrived and the party started off with coffee and cake, Astrid and her husband cutting their very beautiful wedding cake and feeding each other. Hiccup watched them, feeling a little bit -or maybe a lot- jealous. Not that he'd ever admit it to anyone but himself. 

The evening continued with dinner and then, finally, some dancing. After a few minutes of watching Astrid and her husband dance, more people joined in and danced. Astrid's parents, Fishlegs and Heather, even Snotlout and Ruffnut seemed like they couldn't enjoy themselves more. Oh and Hiccup was very surprised to see Tuffnut dance with Astrid's little cousin, Emma. 

He smiled to himself, sipping his drink - non alcoholic since he also had to give Astrid and her husband a ride home after the party - and watching his friends and his best friend enjoy themselves. He watched as Astrid switched dance partners, now dancing with her father instead of her husband, the two of them exchanging quiet words. He watched as she tipped her head back and laughed, his heart aching. As the song ended and another started playing, Hiccup inspecting his drink as if it was the most interesting thing in the world, he didn't notice her making her way over to him. Only when she ducked down to be in his view did he snap back to reality. 

"Everything alright?"

"Yeah, I was just wondering if you were up for a dance?" 

"Y-you and me?" 

She laughed, "yes, me and you."

And with that she took his hand and gently led him onto the dance floor, placing his hands on her waist and wrapping hers around his neck. They weren't standing close enough in Hiccup's opinion, but he wasn't going to complain. 

"Remember this song?" 

Hiccup tried to concentrate on the song currently playing, his face scrunching up in concentration which made his best friend giggle, "oh yeah, it's the same song we danced to when we went to prom together before graduation." 

They went to every prom together, not ever has any of them thought about going to prom without the other's company. However, they had never actually danced until their last prom - being the prom a few weeks before graduation. To Hiccup, the song had a deep meaning - one Astrid herself might not understand - and to her probably as well, which is why he asked, "shouldn't you be dancing to this song with Neil?" 

Astrid chuckled, "no, when I asked him to put this song in our wedding playlist I said that I wanted it so you and I could dance together, I know how much you love it," she said and Hiccup smiled widely. 

Luckily Neil never tried to get between Hiccup's and Astrid's close friendship, he knew that they were inseparable and he and Hiccup had talked about it, Neil telling him that he was absolutely fine with him and his now wife being best friends. He even accepted it when Astrid still kissed Hiccup's cheek from time to time. 

The song continued playing and Hiccup hummed along, removing his hands from Astrid's hips and spinning her around, Astrid laughed and turned, then she was back in his arms again.

And I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways
Maybe just the touch of a hand
Oh me I fall in love with you every single day
And I just wanna tell you I am

He smiled at her in that dorky way she adored since they were teenagers, she felt the muscles in his back work as he hugged her tighter to his body. As the instrumental started playing they swayed with the music, Hiccup singing quietly along as the vocals continued,

So baby now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
I'm thinking out loud
Maybe we found love right where we are

and we found love right where we are

The song ended and the two of them pulled apart, her arms still around his neck, smiling at each other. Hiccup leaned down and gently pressed a kiss to her cheek then stepped back, dipping his head and walking out of the room in desperate need of fresh air to calm his racing heart.

He didn't know how long he'd been outside, but it seemed to be long enough for Astrid to start worrying about him. He was leaning on the fence on the balcony, his hands folded in front of him and listening to the sounds of nature, staring straight ahead, taking in the sight of the cove in the last bits of sunlight. 

He was so lost in thought that he didn't even realize she was there, at least not until she herself leaned on the fence the same way he did, handing him a glass of cola, which he accepted with a shy smile.

"You have been out here for quite a while now, are you okay?"

He hummed, "yeah, just... thinking, I guess."

"About what?" 

He shouldn't tell her, but he really wanted to. 

"Everything?" 

Astrid snorted, "accurate answer." 

"I-I don't know it's just... I mean..." 

He stopped himself from talking, looking at her from the corner of his eyes and secretly admiring her beauty. He shouldn't, she was a married woman after all. 

A warm hand was placed on his wrist and he turned his head to look her into the eyes, reading concern in her expression.

"You've been kind of quiet all day, I'm actually worried."

So she did notice, damn it. He sighed, maybe he should just tell her?

"Don't be, I'm fine." 

Liar. He turned his head away from her again.

"You don't look fine. Please Hiccup, talk to me." 

"I guess it's just... today made me realize how lonely I actually am? I see Heather and Fish together, and even Ruffnut and Snotlout and you and Neil and- and I- I'm so happy for all of you because you guys deserve happiness more than anything else, but...." 

He stopped himself again. He was so stupid, was he seriously just going to confirm his feelings now? After she got married? He wanted to get it off of his chest so desperately, but not at the expense of her perfect wedding. 

"But what, Hiccup?" 

"Never mind, we shouldn't be talking about this now, not after you just got married. I don't want to bring your mood down or anything..." 

Astrid huffed and placed a hand on his cheek, turning his head back towards her, fixing his eyes with hers.

"Just tell me, please." 

And that was all it took to break his resolve.

"I- I... I like you, Astrid, a lot. I always have and probably always will. And I missed my chance in confessing my feelings for you and you met Neil and I see how happy you two are and it hurts, but I know the reason why I'm not the one you married today is my own cowardice and I'm so, so sorry."

He turned away and buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking. Whispering the words 'I'm sorry' again. Astrid was too stunned to do anything for a moment but then she placed her hands on his wrists and removed his hands from his face, turning him around to look at her properly. He didn't look her in the eyes, forest green eyes downcast and slightly red from crying. 

"I'm sorry I didn't realize Hiccup, but I'm happy with Neil, I wouldn't have married him if I wasn't." 

Hiccup just nodded and lifted his gaze, "I know, and I never wanted anything but for you to be happy and I see how happy he makes you. I- I guess I... I just need to find someone like you."

"I'm certain you will." 

She then pulled him into a long hug, silently promising that no matter what happens, she'll always be there for him. And Hiccup felt himself slowly letting go of his crush on her, knowing that she had found happiness and love in someone that wasn't him, but that was okay, as long as the two of them would stay friends. 

Which they did.