It was a sunny Saturday in Berk. Everyone was outside, shopping or just walking around in the City. Hiccup, a fiftheen year old boy, with shaggy, auburn hair and green eyes was entering the Berk central Bank with his mother, Valka. Hiccup was excited, he could finally start taking some driving lessons this week.
Valka and her son had just entered the bank, and stood in one of the lines, as a loud sound was heard, and everyone's heads snapped up.

Four men with masks and weapons, mostly pistols, entered the bank and one of them had shot in the air, to get everyone's attention. "Nobody moves!" He announced as his accomplices slowly started walking to the counter, pointing their weapons at the women behind it, forcing them to give them access to the safe.

Hiccup watched everything, and felt that his mother was slowly taking his arm, pulling him against her. The boy turned around to see nothing but pure fear in his mother's eyes. Then, Hiccup turned back, to see that the man who told the crowd to stay still, slowly walked towards them, pointing his weapon right at the boys face.
Before Hiccup could do anything, the masked man snatched him from his mother's arms, pressing the weapon to his temple. Hiccup's heart skipped a beat, as the cold metal touched his skin.

"IF SOMEONE MAKES A MOVE," the man announced, "THIS BOY RIGHT HERE, IS DEAD!"

Nobody made a move, except one person. Valka tried to wrestle her son free. Another loud sound was heard, and after that, a thud. "NO!"

Hiccup tried to struggle free from the mans grasp, but froze as he felt the cold metal against his temple again. The men hurried and got as much money out of the safe as they could. "Come on," one of them said to the man that had Hiccup in his hands, "we got enough!" He said and the man nodded, but didn't just release the boy. He raised his hand, and slammed the weapon onto Hiccups forehead, the boy led out a muffled groan and collapsed next to his mother, forehead bleeding.

BEEP BEEP

The next thing he could remember were sirens. But it weren't sirens this time, it was his alarm clock.

BEEP BEEP

"Okay, okay," Hiccup groaned and smashed a hand onto his alarm clock. He then groaned again and got up, Hiccup walked into the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. He looked like a mess, dark circles under his eyes, his hair was tousled and he was sweating like he just ran a marathon. It's been four years since his mothers death, and he still wasn't over the loss. Hiccup had nightmares, almost every night he saw the same scene, his mother, trying to get him out of the mans grasp, the shot and finally, the thud.

His father knew that Hiccup was still suffering and he did his best to be at the boys side, but as mayor, he had other duties and couldn't be at the boys side every day for the rest of his life.

Hiccup got ready for school and made his way downstairs, where his father was already waiting. "You look like a mess, son," he stated while reading the newspaper.

Hiccup sighed and poured some muesli into a bowl, "thank you, for summing that up," he commented dryly.

Stoick looked at his son with sad and worried eyes, "you need distraction, son," he said and Hiccup rolled his eyes, "I'm fine dad, really," he assured his father and Stoick sighed. There was no chance he could change his stubborn sons mind.

They sat there in silence for the rest of their breakfast. Hiccup finished his muesli and got back up stairs to get his schoolbag, once he entered his room, he closed the door and sat on the chair in front of his desk. He opened one of the drawers of his desk, and got out a blade. He then slowly pulled up the sleeve of his shirt, and slowly started cutting the skin of his upper arm. He sighed and smiled as he saw how the blood slowly poured out of the cut. Once he was done, he put the blade on his desk and used a tissue to wipe away the blood. He covered the wound with his sleeve, grabbed his bag, said goodbye to his dad, who obviously didn't knew anything about his sons self harm, and walked to school.

Hiccup was a good student, well not the best, the best student was one of his friends, Astrid Hofferson. Astrid was a beautiful, blonde girl with blue eyes, and Hiccup was glad she was one of his friends. They weren't really close, close friends, since Astrid was popular and Hiccup wasn't, but they had spent some time with each other, they went to the movies, to a restaurant and just hung around. But they weren't dating or anything, they were just friends.

Once he arrived at school, he made his way to his locker to get the books he needed for his first couple of classes.
Hiccup closed his locker and was about to walk to his first class, which was Maths, when a girl suddenly appeared in front of him. "WOAH!" Hiccup exclaimed as he nearly dropped his books, "Ruffnut, what the Hel!" He said and the blonde girl in front of him laughed, her twin brother appeared next to her, laughing as hard as his sister.

The twins Ruffnut and Tuffnut were the pranksters of Berk High, both dedicated their lives to Loki, the god of pranks. If there was any prank in school, you could count on the fact, that it was one if the twins' pranks. "You should have seen your face, H," Tuffnut said and nudged the boys shoulder. Hiccup rolled his eyes and ignored them, walking to his first class.

The first few classes went by fast and Hiccup found himself in the cafeteria to have lunch. Hiccup wasn't hungry at all so he decided to go to the football field, where he could be alone for a few minutes, before had had to go back to class. He sat down on one of the bleachers and looked around. It was quite warm for a berkien day, the sun has been shining, but was currently hiding behind some big, dark clouds. Hiccup assumed that it was going to rain after school, so he had to walk home through the rain, damn, he felt excited. Hiccup was lost in his thoughts and didn't notice the blonde girl that sat down next to him, until she spoke up, "hey, Hiccup."

Hiccup turned his head to look at Astrid, she was smiling at him, so he smiled back, "hey," he replied and she rose a brow, "are you okay?" she asked and Hiccup nodded dumbly.
"Yeah, why not?" the auburn haired boy asked and Astrid shrugged, "you seemed zoned out," she replied.

The boy shrugged, "I was just thinking," he said calmly Astrid nodded.

"You want do hang around after school?" She asked him and he looked at her, then smiled and nodded. "Sure, why not," he replied, "what time?" He asked the blonde girl, "right after school, maybe?" She suggested and Hiccup nodded as the bell rang. He sighed, "well, back to class."

Astrid laughed "well, we have Viking History together now," she said and Hiccup face palmed, "I hate Viking History," he admitted and Astrid giggled, "who doesn't."

Viking History went by rather fast, it was boring as always and the teacher, Mr Grimborn, was talking in his cool and boring voice, making Hiccup want to fall asleep. As school was over, Hiccup and Astrid walked home together, talking about their day, about their friends and about school. "Grimborn really doesn't like you," Astrid stated as they crossed the road, the auburn haired boy shrugged, "who does?" He asked her and Astrid stopped walking and gave her friend an offended look, "I do!" She protested and Hiccup turned around and smiled, "hey, that's good news!" He said and Astrid shook her head, laughing.

They were walking in silence for about two minutes as is started to rain, and not just a little bit rain, it was some kind of storm that just arrived, making it hard to even walk because all of the wind and rain, "oh great," Hiccup exclaimed and reached out a hand to Astrid, the girl gently took it and they walked through the storm that got rougher every minute. It took them longer than usual to get to Hiccups house and when they arrived, they both were soaked. It wasn't really a problem for Hiccup, since he lived her and had clothes, but Astrid unfortunately didn't live her and if she won't change into something dry, she might get a cold. "Are you okay?" Hiccup asked as he took off his jacket, he was freezing and assumed Astrid was too.

"Ju-just a little b-bit cold," she replied hugging her arms, Hiccup ruffled his hair and took her hand, leading her to his room. He sat her down on his bed and Astrid looked around his room, noticing something on his desk, she frowned. Hiccup emerged from his closet with some of his clothes.

He sighed and handed her a long sleeved shirt and black sweatpants, "you can change in the bathroom while I get you something warm to drink, okay?" He asked her and Astrid looked at the clothes dumbly, but nodded.

"Th-thanks," she stuttered, still freezing, Hiccup nodded and left the room, making his way to the kitchen to make himself and his friend a hot chocolate. Meanwhile Astrid changed into Hiccups clothes and she found them quite comfortable. She entered Hiccups room, noticing that he wasn't there yet, she made her way to his desk to look at what she discovered a few minutes earlier closely. She was very worried once the object on his desk emphasized as a blade, which was covered in a tiny bit of blood. Astrid frowned and realized that her friend must be hiding a huge secret from her, which maybe causes him to hurt himself, and if she doesn't stop him now, he may go further, by killing himself.

Astrid took the blade and sat back down on his bed. Five minutes later, her friend entered the room with two mugs of Hot chocolate in his hands. He handed one of the mugs to the blonde girl and Astrid accepted it gratefully. She then thought of a way to start this conversation, which was about to get very deep. "Hiccup?" She started and Hiccup, who sat down next to her looked up, "yeah?"

Astrid sighed, "a-are you hiding something from me?" She asked him directly and Hiccup's jaw dropped.

He then shook his head, "no," he said and Astrid frowned, he just lied to her.
"Don't lie," she accused him and Hiccup tensed.
"I'm not lying," he defended himself but Astrid wasn't fooled. She sighed and showed him the blade, "what is this...?" She asked him and Hiccup grew pale.
The boy tried to snatch the blade from her but Astrid was faster, "nothing!" He said and the blonde girl placed her mug down. Hiccup did the same a few seconds later,
"Hiccup," she started and Hiccup started shaking his head, "I want, I want to know what this is, please, tell me, I can help." She insisted and Hiccup kept shaking his head, and then, he buried his face in his hands, and his body began to shake. A few seconds later, Astrid realized that her friend was crying, and she immediately felt guilty. The girl took a deep breath and scooted closer to him, wrapping her arms around his lean, shaking shape, comforting him. Hiccup found himself leaning into her, feeling the warmth of her body against his, it was a good feeling, which he had missed.

"Shh, it's okay," she soothed him, "I'm here, I won't leave you," she said hugging him closely.

Hiccup sobbed, "I'm so weak," his voice was shaky and a little bit hoarse. Astrid was shocked and she shook her head, "you're not weak, Hiccup."

Hiccup pulled away and looked at the ground, "I am." He insisted and Astrid got a little bit angry. She couldn't believe this. Her best friend was harming himself, and she didn't even notice until now, that he was suffering from depression. She felt the urge to kick herself for not noticing this earlier!

The blonde girl took one his hands, "you're not weak Hiccup," she said and placed her right hand on his cheek, wiping away his tears, feeling like crying herself. She sighed, "tell me what, and more importantly, why?" She asked and Hiccup shook his head.

"I can't."

"Why not?" The girl asked softly and Hiccup shrugged. He didn't know why, he just couldn't tell her, he was afraid that he might lose his best friend, and the thought of losing another person that was really close to him - in either way - was just killing him. "Hiccup?" Astrids voice sounded and Hiccup snapped back to reality.

"It's not that easy, Astrid," he stated and Astrid sighed, "tell me anyways," she said and Hiccup slowly nodded, knowing that he couldn't talk his way out of this.

"I keep seeing it," he started, Astrid was confused but didn't say anything since she knew he would tell her, "I, I keep seeing mom, being shot down, I keep feeling the cold metal against my temple, I keep hearing the shot," he said and Astrid immediately knew what her friend was talking about. The experience of losing his mom changed him in many ways. He then sighed and closed his eyes, a tear rolling down his cheek, slowly Astrid used her thumb to wipe it away, the boy took Astrids hand, which was still holding his own, and slowly moved it to his chest, where his heart was located, "it just hurts," he admitted, "in here."

As those words left his mouth, Astrid felt his heartbeat, surprisingly slow and even, she didn't know what to say anymore so she just leaned her head on his shoulder, trying to symbolize him, that she was there for him. Hiccup placed his head atop of hers, still feeling the girls warmth. "It's okay," Astrid said finally, "you don't have to tell me everything," she said, "I just wanted to understand." And Hiccup nodded and smiled.

"It felt good," he admitted and Astrid looked up to meet kind emerald green eyes, "it felt good to tell someone what is bothering me, Dad rarely has time to listen to me," he said, then placed a brief kiss on her cheek, "thank you."

Astrid smiled, "can you promise me to stop?" She asked him and Hiccup looked at the ground, as if it was the most interesting thing he ever saw, "Hiccup? Please promise me to stop. It worries me, I care about you, probably more than you can imagine. It hurts seeing you like this, you're my friend, I want to help you." Astrid said and Hiccup hesitated but slowly nodded.

"I'll do my best," he said, "but sometimes, when you have nobody to talk to, it feels really relieving. When, when I cut the skin, it feels like all my sorrows are gone for the briefest of moments," the auburn haired boy admitted in a low voice, barely above a whisper.

"Can anything replace this feeling?" She asked him, "or do you have to cut yourself to feel free of sorrows?" She asked trying to find a way to stop his self harm.

The boy shrugged, "I don't know."

Astrid sighed, "can I do anything?" She asked again.

Hiccup turned to her and smiled, "you're always there for me if I need you Astrid, you're already doing something, more than you should be doing," he said and Astrid smiled back.

Without noticing, they leaned in, slowly. Their lips met and first, it felt weird to kiss a close friend. But further they deepened their kiss, it grew more passionate and hot. Their lips moved in sync and after a few seconds they broke their kiss, Hiccup leaned his forehead against Astrids and he smiled realizing something. "That's it," he said and Astrid pulled away looking confused, "what do you mean?" She asked him and Hiccups smile grew wider.

"That was the exact same feeling," he said and ran his hand through his hair, "kissing you, it feels like cutting myself, just without the pain!" Hiccup exclaimed happily.

Astrid smiled at him, seeing him happy for the first time today, "is this your way to ask me to be your girlfriend?" She teased him and Hiccup's smile dropped.

"I don't know if you want to be my girlfriend, I'm pretty much a screw up, not worth anything, why would you be my girlfriend if there are so many people out there who-" he was cut off because Astrid placed a hand on his mouth trying to stop him from rambling.

"I'd like to be your girlfriend Hiccup," she chuckled, "I always have," she said and Hiccup smiled again.

"Wow," was the only thing he could say as they slowly started to mean in again to share another passionate and deep kiss.
"Thank you for being there."

"Always..."

From that point, Hiccups life got better. He still had nightmares from time to time but if he had nightmares, he always talked to his girlfriend afterwards. It helped him a lot to know that she will always be at his side. She was like his save harbour, always there if he was in need or in doubt of himself. He even found the courage to talk to his Dad, who immediately spent more time with his only son.
As you can see, if you keep every single problem you have to yourself, it will damage you, in many ways. Just try to talk to someone...

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I've been writing this for a few weeks now. It wasn't easy and I really, really have no idea how it feels if you cut yourself or how it feels to suffer from depression. I already tried to help people who are suffering from depression on Instagram, I think I have helped some of them. But you can't help all of them. Depression is something very, very serious and you should take care of anyone who might suffer from it.

I hope you liked this One-Shot. See you in the next one! ツ