raindrop sonata
outside the coldness speaks beyond
anything i could ever say
the cold breaks the skin
punctures the soul
freezes my already cold
heart.
i wait for you
always waiting
waiting for a change
an answer
a reason to stay
i want to stay
i want to go
and yet i stay because you said
you love me and only me
and your words put wings on my fractured heart
and filled up my hollow soul
like molten gold into a goblet
the heat burns
i am suffocating
you hold my heart
you pull me by the hair
you tug at my arms
you are a master puppeteer
and i can only dance to your rhythm
your songlike lies that tumble
like ribbons of blood out
of your crystal lips.
i wait and wait
for something great to happen
something great to me
great to you
we are worse for wear
and yet we look for ways
to repair.
i'm sorry, i can't make it
your words form into a mask
a knife
an icicle of hatred
my heart grows heavy
suddenly it's no longer made
of human muscle and blood
but instead made of steel
and broken glass
the more it beats
the more it wounds.
maybe some other time?
always that other time
but it's as if the very concept
does not exist to you
you can make me hate you
any time you please
and yet you can make me love you
faster than the first
weak, i am
stubborn, i am
i wait for the other time
its existence unsure
just like us.
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