S O R E N

"Now, boys, I want you to be back for dinner. Remember, Friday night is family night!" My mother's voice chimed as she fussed about Red's jacket that had a stain on it.

It was surprising seeing her so focussed on us, especially on how we looked or felt. What was more surprising was that she had time to cook us breakfast, brushing off the maids in the process. Sure the toast was burnt and the bacon was rock hard, it was still kind of nice, nice to have her around, nice to see her.

"How could we forget? It's been ongoing for two years." Colin laughed, grabbing an apple from a silver tray that a maid was offering all of us.

My mother smiled grabbing Robin's coat and helping him put it on, "Also Robin, make sure your twin doesn't spend a hundred dollar on those gambling games only to bring home another giant stuffed bear."

"You know he does it so he can get a free Valentine's gift?" Red grinned at Colin who gave him the finger.

"Red—" I watched Red pick up his car keys as my mother walked over to him, "Please drive safely."

My mother rushed to the front door and Red bent down and kissed her cheek, "I will, mom."
Robin kissed her cheek as well and told her not to work too hard. Colin followed, kissing her cheek before letting her fuss over his messy blonde hair.

I put my beanie on and walked towards the door, feeling extremely awkward. The last time I had hugged mum was when the family was given screen time and they wanted to see our fake family relationship- that was at least six months ago.

I glanced at her eyes as I walked past and felt her cold hand grab my own gently. I turned to face her and watched as she grabbed both my hands.

"You have a good time sweetie... Don't get hurt." Her was voice was kind but her eyes shone with worry. "Stay with your brothers."

I nodded, stance frozen due to the comfortableness and the fact I had no idea how to react. She reached up and tucked a piece of my black hair into the beanie, pulling down the sides over my ears.

"Don't want you getting a cold." She whispered, trying to fix my jacket, which was interrupted by the horn of the car, "Oh, well..."

She placed both of her hands on either side of my face, her wedding ring cold against my cheek. Fiona's eyes were staring deep into mine and I felt myself leaning towards her so she could reach my forehead.

She kissed my forehead gently and whispered, "I love you Soren, please, please be safe."

I knew she meant not to get into fights and as I opened my eyes, which I hadn't realised were close, wet tears met my gaze. Her eyes were red as tears streamed down her face.

"Mom, I'm just going to a carnival." I said, slowly taking one of her hands off my cheek, "we're not fuc—we're not joining the Mafia."

She kept flicking between each of my eyes and it was at the close proximity that I noticed the dark patch under her eye, makeup put on so heavily it seemed to make her skin rise.

"What happened to your eye?" I asked and watched as she snapped away from me as if I burnt her, turning her face away.

"Nothing! Off you go." She grabbed the door handle and forced me to walk out of the house.

"Did someone fucking punch—" the door was slammed in my face and I found myself kicking one of the garden's pot plants over.

I stomped over to the car where the boys waited impatiently. I opened the door and slammed it behind me.

"Fuck, Soren, you trying to bring the door inside the car with you?" Red swore, as he started the engine and made a U-turn.

"Dad's fucking punching mom."

Colin looked up from his phone and snapped his head towards me. I didn't have time to watch Colin's expression turn into anger because Red slammed on the breaks sending us, all, flying forward. I felt my body fly forward, the seat belt colliding with my chest hard.

"I swear if you're joking!" Red yelled, turning around to face the backseat as Robin stared around at the traffic we'd caused from stopping in the middle of the road.

"When have I ever fucking made a joke?" I spat, feeling my nails dig into my own palms.
Car horns started to beep when they realised the car wasn't going to be moving anytime soon.

"Get out. I'm driving." Robin stated calmly. He was, indeed, the calmest of us all. Red and Robin exchanged seats and we were moving again moments later.

"How do you know?" Colin asked, checking his phone once before making eye contact with me.

"You're seriously checking your phone? I know millions of girls send you nudes, you horny shithead, but this is fucking serious!" I yelled, feeling the urge to tackle my brother who sat in the back seat with me.

"Fucking calm down! I'm texting Jay, telling her to come out the front of her house now."

"W-what?" I stuttered, "Jay doesn't own—"

Red interrupted me, "Who cares! She's coming with us to the carnival; Colin invited her. Now, how do you know Dad p—" Red swallowed his anger as a vein bulged out of his forehead, "—punched mom?"

"She kissed my forehead, and I could see the pounds of makeup around her eye. I had enough time to notice the dark black showing through." I explained, "She didn't want us to know, she wouldn't even answer my question if her eye was okay."

"What do we do?" Colin asked mainly to Red, the oldest of us all who was staring at Colin and I with a frozen expression.

"I...I don't know." The words that left Red's lips caused my blood to run cold; Red always knew what to do.

It wasn't until the car stopped, that I realised it was moving at all. I glanced out the window, my eyes widened in shock of how run down all the buildings were.

Colin got out of the car and greeted Jay with a hug, who waved at Robin in the front seat. He held the door open and I watched as she climbed in next to me. Colin closed the door and the car was suffocated in silence.

I looked at Jay cautiously, feeling my cheeks turn red as she glanced up at me. This was the first time I'd seen her since the incident. She's seen me cry, seen me break down. I felt embarrassed for crying and letting someone see me that way.

She drew a smile, but when I didn't return it, I watched it fall slowly, "Um... Is everything okay? Am I too overdressed or underdressed?"

Jay was dressed in white jeans. She wore an old rain jacket that seemed almost vintage, almost classy. Her black boots seemed more comfortable than stylish.

"Um, Jay," Red said slowly, facing forward refusing to look behind and have to face her questioning gaze, "We just—we're having a family crisis right now. So..."

Jay's eyes widened in shock, "Oh god, I'm sorry. We're not that far from my house, I don't have to come. I can walk home—"

Colin interrupted her, "No, it's okay. It's just, we're all trying to process what just happened."

Jay slumped in her seat as she tried to make herself invisible, holding onto her purse as a way to keep her hands occupied.

"Do we confront Dad?" Robin asked, merging into the freeway as Jay sank further down in the seat.

"Maybe it's better just to see if it happens again?" Colin suggested but Red shut that down quickly.

"If he has done it once, who's to say he hasn't done it more?" Red questioned, running a hand through his hair, "I just can't decide if it's our place to say anything."

"How about we ask mom about all this?" Robin suggested, turning off the freeway as the fair was now visible.

Red rested his head on his hands, "She won't tell us anything."

"You could get her drunk."

Everyone in the car turned and looked at Jay who went bright red. Colin was grinning, Robin and Red both had their mouths open and I found myself plotting a plan.

Red started to protest, "We're not—"

"No, she's right. We could get the maids to make eggnog and we can bribe them into putting heaps of alcohol in it." I said as the car pulled up into the parking lot. Jay grinned at me and I flashed her a small smile.

I glanced up to meet Colin's gaze, his expression of confusion. Everyone climbed out of the car, discussing which day they'd plan on getting her drunk. It had to be a day when Dad wasn't home but when mom would have enough time to sit down and eat with them.

I fell behind and walked next to Jay, who had her hands in her pockets and her hood up. She was beginning to look more like me as the days grew older.

"You didn't tell me you had a phone." My voice came across more offended than annoyed. Jay pulled an iPhone from her pocket.

"I didn't have one until yesterday. Colin gave me his old one." She smiled and she turned the phone over and rubbed a thumb over the smooth surface, "Would you like my phone number?"

"Later." I mumbled. We reached the ticket stall and bought our way into the massive carnival.

"Okay, so we'll try forgetting this morning just for now." Red announced as we stood in a small circle inside the gates, "I'm going to meet up with Sandra. I'll see you back at these gates, say, by 4:30?"

Robin, Colin, Jay and I walked towards the tallest ride in the carnival looking into the stalls on the way past.

Jay glanced behind her and I followed her gaze. Red was hugging a girl with warm brown skin, her hair was thick and wild.

"They're adorable." She said in awe as Red kissed his girlfriend on the nose gently, taking her hand and leading her away.

"He ain't allowed to date her." I explained bluntly, walking along side her as we glanced into the ring throw stall, "Dad doesn't like her."

"Why?" Jay's big brown eyes stared into me like I was an open book. Colin came to the rescue unconsciously by grabbing her hand and bragging that he could win a stuffed bear for her.

I rolled my eyes and watched as he threw small balls into glass cups. Jay laughed when Colin missed all three shots.

"Don't look so glum." Robin spoke; he was looking at me with a soft smirk that reminded me of Daren, "He's scared of heights; he won't be so cocky soon enough."

No emotions flashed through my eyes and I refused to move beside the shrug of my shoulders. Even the idea of Jay with any of my brothers seemed wrong and sickening.

"I'm meeting a friend." Robin announced as he tapped on his phone quickly, "I'll see you around."

I watched Robin leave. For the first time in my life, I felt like I was third wheeling. I didn't know if it was even possible to third wheel, if you were all friends.

Jay stood next to me as Colin threw another hoop which missed by a mile.

"We should probably stop him." Jay said flatly but her eyes shone with amusement, watching him with a comical grin as he swore he'd get it this time.

"It's his addiction; he relies on chance."

Jay turned to face me directly, "I didn't get to eat breakfast so I'm going to do find some 'dead bird' as you call it. Want to come?"

I shrugged, "Colin, we're going to go get food. You coming?"

Colin waved awkwardly behind him, refusing to take his eye off the glass, "I'll find you."

Jay and I walked close together through the sea of people, it wasn't my favourite environment. Our state got a free day due to the nationwide event, might as well use it. That, and I couldn't handle staying home alone in massive quiet empty house. You just have too much time to think and by the way I thought, it would've ended with blood.

"So you want dead bird on a stick or bird in a bun?" Jay asked as we waited in a line. She was scanning the types of meals we could get.

I was more focused on the clown that was standing dangerously close to our stall. His costume, big feet and white face sent shivers down my back.

"Soren, hello? You okay?" Jay's voice seeped into my ears but I never let my eyes off the clown as I answered.

"What?"

"There's a couples' deal. We could do it; it'd save us seven dollars."

"I don't need to save seven dollars." I said. My head tilted to one side in confusion before snapping my attention to the clown.

"Yeah, well, I do, so shush. You'll be my boyfriend for three minutes." Jay's voice held no hint of offence or humour- she was completely serious. I didn't know a lot about Jay but I knew in general: never mess with a hungry woman.

I was too distracted by the fat, white-faced man to read her expression but her posture from the corner of my eye seemed positive.

"You two are a couple?" The man in the stall questioned; he was sweaty, even though it was cold, which suddenly put me off anything Jay had ordered us.

"Yes." Jay said confidently. She intertwined her hand in mine. I forced myself not to look down at our hands. Her hand was warm unlike moms. They were also surprisingly soft.
The big operate wiped his hands on his apron, "I don't believe you."

"Are you kidding me? I just saw you give it to those obvious T W I N siblings." Jay argued, telling the man off who was obviously just enjoying his job. When you flip patties 24/7 you'd have some fun when you saw the opportunity.

"I'm sorry miss. I can't give you the deal." He raised an eyebrow at Jay; little did they both know that I was holding in a high-pitched scream.

"IT'S A HAMBURGER! Feed the starving—"

The clown snapped his head in my direction and slowly and menacing walked towards us, smelling the fear dripping off me.

It was when Jay's voice went up an octave, that I suggested we choose a different place to eat. Someone's rasp breathing fluttered against the side of my face, snapping me head in their direction I made eye contact with green contacts.

I jumped from fright before I kicked the guy straight in the nuts, "Fucking, dipshit, fuck."

The guy hunched himself over, grabbing the only thing he could be proud of when he's full time job was to be a clown for parties.

Jay was too busy arguing about the food; she didn't even notice.

"You stay right there you motherfucker." I hissed, realising I was gripping onto Jay's hand with such force that when I let go my fingerprints were left in white on her palm.

"I'm just kidding," the big man, who smelt of grime and sweat, laughed, handing us our couple food, "I know you're a couple; it was just getting prepared out the back."

"OOOO! Ouch, what happened to him?" Jay asked and the clown hobbled off holding his crutch; I could even hear him moaning in pain.

"I have absolutely no idea."

-

How did you find this; cute? Funny? Horrible?

OH MY GAWD!!!!! We got #419 on the list!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh. For a moment I tried to keep my composure but no—GO US!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH, I whove you!

Cover by @
I cannot find your username, I am so sorry. Please tell me if you see this, I want to give you credit (16/7/2020)