Dear Fin,

    I'm crying as I write this down because I saw Etta today.

    When I came to town, I knew I had to face her; I hadn't for so long because of you, but she was so wonderful in herself that I needed to see her. I was so scared at just even the prospect of it, though. But today, feeling the smallest ounce of courage within my body, I tamed it and found my way's to Etta's home.

    But with Etta, we still have so much for to talk about. I'm not sure yet if I'm ready to face the conversation I had with Etta.

    Encounter Number Seventy-Two:

    There's something so beautiful about spring. Maybe it's the way that winter has faded, allowing nature a rebirth, creating a world that is lush and colourful and healthy; or maybe it's the way that summer has not come yet, so that the environment can still be admired without the devastating burden of heat. Or maybe it's just you.

    You and I had been enjoying the blissful days during our annual spring break. While others would vacation or party, you and I just lingered in each other's presence, happier than ever. Everything between you and I had slowly been falling together, more perfectly than I could have ever planned. I had never been so happy.

    Life continues, no matter how much we wish it to stop sometimes; sometimes, you just had to hop into the fast lane and hope for the best.

    My therapy had been going well the last couple of months. I just felt better about everything; for once I was seeing the world in color rather than in shades of black and white. I hadn't hurt myself in weeks. Dr. Howard had even started giving me some exercises to practice to help with my speaking ability.

    That day you and I had spent at the beach with Etta.  It was deserted, just the three of us and the sky, painted a brilliant blue; the sun glistened upon the waves, which gently lapped onto the sandy shore. The water itself was icy cold, which make it at times unbearable to swim in, unless the sun was shining hard upon your back.

    I was and will always be self-conscious about my body. You had already seen me naked a couple times, but standing before you in just my bikini felt . . . weird. My self-esteem was higher, but it was just a commonly known fact that I wasn't sexy. I was Annalise Martin, after all. I used a towel to cover up my exposed skin when I was out of the water.

    Etta came out of the water, grabbing a towel to dry off. You were still in the water, carefully gliding through the waves. She frowned at me. "Aren't you hot?"

    I shrugged. "I'm f-fine."

    "It's like ten trillion degrees, how aren't you hot?" Etta asked.

    "Just not."

    She bit her lip. "You know, you don't need to be shy around me."

    "Pa-pardon?"

    "I mean, excuse me if you're not, but you don't have to be shy; we're both girls and we both know what goes where. Besides, you're pretty, Anna. You have nothing to be shy about," Etta told me, taking a seat next to me.

    I blushed. I didn't even know how to respond.

    "Plus, we both know that Fin is crazy about you. Look wise, I don't think there's a lot you could do to your appearance that could change that," she added. "He thinks you're absolutely stunning, which is obvious to everyone else but you."

    "Th-thanks, Etta."

    "No need to thank me, your nun-like modesty was just making me uncomfortable," she insisted, leaning back on her towel and shutting her eyes.

    I couldn't help but think of how beautiful Etta was. With her pixie cut caramel hair and shining emerald eyes, but also with that enigmatic grin and sharp cheekbones and a figure any girl would kill for . . . I was oddly jealous of your sister, Fin. Yet I absolutely adored her. After you, I would say she was my best friend.

    Etta and I had spent more and more time together. Sometimes, she joined us on day trips like this, while other times we would go shopping together or see a movie. Spending time with her was so much fun, but fun in a different way than the time I spent with you.

    Soon, you joined the two of us. Etta appeared to be napping under the sun's fiery gaze and, upon seeing her closed eyes; you planted a passionate kiss onto my lips. I let my fingers curl into your hair and pull you closer, deepening the touch. You hands skimmed my shoulders, exposing my skin from under the towel. Your mouth trailed hot kisses along my jaw and my throat, all the way up to my ear.

    "You look so hot right now," you breathed.

    I blushed, before pulling you back for more kisses. You pressed my back onto the towel, your body planted on top of mine, the fiery passion shooting hard between us.

    "I'm right here, you know.  If you're going to like, grope each other at a public place, can't you at least have the decency to either a.) not do it while I'm around or, b.) be really quiet?" Etta groaned from beside us.

    I blushed, detangling myself from you.

    "In return for viewing such a horrid sight, may I please enjoy a beverage?" She asked, glancing at the cooler we brought with us.

    Although we were all underage, we're all guilty of drinking. None of us drank too much –you and I drinking practically nothing- but it still occurred from time to time. We had brought a couple of beers with us on the trip.

    You sighed. "Alright."

    Etta grinned, victoriously. She won a lot of battles since she wasn't against playing dirty and using blackmail.

    Soon, the hot day faded from our grasps, and it was time to return home.  You and I really didn't want to go. Your fingers had been constantly rubbing my naked thigh, causing sparks of desire to race through my veins. That same spark lingered in your eyes.

    "Listen, Etta, why don't you go on ahead?" I heard you asking, although your eyes didn't leave mine. "We need to load up with some more gas if we want to make it back. We'll pack up here so by the time you return with the car, we'll be ready to go."

    Etta agreed. "I get to drive? Fin, you never let me drive. This is so cool; I'm officially the coolest person in the history of being cool. I love you, bro."

    You handed her the keys and she basically flew to the car. With a grin and a wave, she was gone. And we were alone.

    You smiled at me for a moment, a grin quite similar to Etta's. "We don't have too much time before Etta returns, my dove."

    "Then we be-better be quick," I responded.

    You kissed me, your fingers crawling to my back to untie my bikini. And for a few moments, as we rolled around in the sand, the world was forgotten and it was just you and I together in the most intimate of ways.

    After we finished and made ourselves appear presentable, we organized all of our things. Etta was yet to reappear. One hour passed, then two. After three hours, all your patience had diminished completely.

    I tried to calm you down. "Fin, she could've g-gotten l-lost-"

    "It's literally three minutes away from here," you insisted. "She ditched us, my dove; she just got up and ditched us."

    I gulped. "I'm sure-"

    "What are we going to do?" You asked. "We-"

    Suddenly, your phone started ringing.  

    With a sigh, you accepted the call. "Hello? Wait . . . Mom, calm down. It's okay, shh . . . okay, so tell me what happened . . . no. No. She was just here a moment, I saw her. "

    And then I knew everything was wrong. I wrapped my arms around you, stroking your hair, as you pressed your face into my shoulder and accused your mother of lying on the phone. Tears fell onto my shirt.

    Finally, you hung up.

    "My mother's coming, she's going to take us to the hospital," you told me.

    I nodded and we lied back down on the sand. You curled up against my stomach and I continued to stroke your hair, feeling your cool tears pool against my stomach. I could feel the world falling apart around us.

    I wanted to cry, too, because suddenly I had just known. But I had to be strong for you until we could know. Everything had to be alright . . . everything would be alright. We just needed to give it time.

    "She's lying," you murmured, against my skin.

    But your mother wouldn't lie.

    It felt like the end of the world.

    Maybe because it was.

    Momentary End of Encounter Number Seventy-Two.

    I'm sorry; I can't even see the words throughout all my tears. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Finland Erickson. It hurts me, too, how much I'm sorry. I just can't right now. This was not the end, but it felt like it. Everything felt like the end after she was gone.

    I love you so much, Fin. I wish I could've been there for you more when you needed me. I loveyou, I love you, I love you.

    -Annalise.

*

Hey Reader!

   Song: "Falling Slowly" by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova. This song is one of my favorite of all times, if there is one song on this playlist I'm asking -no, begging- you to listen to, it's this one. This song is technically about a romantic relationship that is falling apart, but I think that it can also just apply to any relationship falling (platonic or not). This applies to the Etta situation and Annalise/Fin.

    Please show this chapter some love . . . I'm so sorry I had to hurt you. I'm sorry I had to hurt me. Thank you for reading; you're all the Finland Erickson's -without the heartbreak- to my Annalise Martin.

    Love Your Favorite Liar <3