W O N D E R

There was an eerie blank spot against the kids that flustered there way down the hall, pulling out books from their lockers in a somewhat ordered fashion. I stood silently, centred in the middle of the hall as I stared out everyone trying to figure out what was missing.

Whom was missing.

There was absence in the crowd, I could feel it. But, I could also see it. There was unusual peace considering there had been usually a disruptions to the routine to the day.

I knew what was missing when it came back in the form of large shoulders, loud laughter and an unnerving stance. Standing utterly alone, I watched as a group of around nine boys entered the hall through the school's side door, a sway of pure confidence with lacking in humbleness echoed within their steps.

And through the crowd of blurred face, His eyes met my own. The leader to the group who's mere presence moved students out of his way, or maybe it was large chest and reputation that moved them — they didn't want any trouble.

Tom Sawyer stalked towards me with a smirk, a subconscious hand running through his hair as he approached me. A small group formed around me as the brown haired boy scoffed once before he crossed his arms, a humoured but oddly friendly shimmer in his eyes. It was only then I saw his red, freshly split knuckles.

My eyes flicked up to a particular blonde figure, Colin McKinin, who leant his shoulder against the locker door, eyes casted to the ground as he crossed his arms.

"We took care of it." Tom boosted proudly, taking a step towards me with victorious smirk, pride flashing in his vibrant green eyes, eyes that sent shivers across my skin in waves.

"It?" I questioned, utterly confused but also partly in shock in the horror of he'd beaten someone up — scared he'd done it for me.

"That fucker." His jaw gritted with hatred, "Samantha's—" I held up my hand not wanting to hear what I knew already, what I couldn't forget. He nodded sharply before his eyes found my shoulder in where my jacket had slipped off my shoulder slightly.

Realising he'd seen the bruise, I gripped the fabric and pulled it towards my neck which caused (to my surprise) a pained expression to shadow in my ex's face.

You're not allowed to do that.

Feeling cornered and as if I couldn't breathe, I nodded sharply, not making eye contact with him though. Brushing past Tom with a hurriedly to get away from them all only I pausing to look up at Colin.

Feeling my gaze, he turned before tilting his gaze down, ocean eyes dead calm as I proceeded to drown in my own unheard, unseeable and untouchable storm. I swallowed hard when I realised he wasn't going to say anything, feeling embarrassed I even thought he would.

With two paces I'd pasted the group of boys who'd somewhat blocked the path for the other students. There was a sharp grab to my wrist, which I automatically flinched from, the motion tugging me backwards slightly.

Turning, I looked up at Colin who let go my wrist quickly as our met before pushing the hair away from his face, eyes casted at the ground momentarily.

"You were drunk." His voice was merely a whisper and I was grateful for that, "And I overreacted." I stared at him with wide eyes as he stuffed his hands into his pockets, "Er— Soren and well, Robin too told me you weren't looking so... healthy? I don't know if that's the right word..."

I nodded softly before offering him a small yet comforting soft smile, extending out my elbow as my hands stayed fixated in my pockets. Colin laced his hand in the empty space without hesitation before harsh call from Tom was heard, "Colin, You coming?"

His voice sounding strained.

Colin looked over his shoulder with a calm expression at the boy to whom jaw was clenched, "No. We are going the opposite way."

With that, Colin tugged on my elbow and we walked down the hall calmly and without remorse. An odd and new sense fell over me. The feeling of being protected, the feeling of being safe.

"You alright?" He whispered as we walked, his head tilted in my direction, "Samantha... Well, that sick-"

I shrugged midway through his sentence which stopped it abruptly because I didn't want to say the one word, "I feel the constant need to throw up, honestly. I was meant to watch her drink... I haven't been in contact with her since then, I'm too afraid to text her and she didn't come to school today. I don't know whether someone slipped her a pill in her drink and that's how she got in that situation..."

Colin unlaced his arm from my elbow and slung it around my neck in a comforting almost sibling way, "It's not your fault that people make those decisions, Wonder."

"But I was meant to watch her..." My walk became obviously less confident as I could feel myself turn a shade whiter, "I bashed through the door... I punched him so hard, Colin. But, I don't think... I don't know if I made it in time."

Colin and I climbed the stairs in sync as we leaned into each other so to talk as quiet as possible. The tall boy stopped abruptly before he looked into the empty classroom to our left, gesturing for me to enter first, so I did.

I sat cross legged on a desk as Colin leant again the empty teachers table looking at me with a serious but concerned expression. There was a silence that I was comfortable with, I was somewhat used to it.

The memories flashed within my mind without warning and I knew the trauma showed on my face because Colin's brow suddenly creased.

A shake I couldn't control subconsciously started as her cry echoed my head. I fought back tears as to not cry in front of him , "I'm so scared, Colin." He gulped hard before he rubbed the pain between his eyes, pitching the bridge of his nose.

"Wonder?" My head shot up from ground as to stared at him with a look pure desperation. In that moment I was pure vulnerable. Colin sighed deeply before asking slowly and hesitantly, "Has a guy — anyone, ever... Violated you like that?"

Something within that question broke me. Maybe it was someone actually asking me that, to hear those few words that no one had ever known to ask. The comfort that someone cared, that what happened wasn't all in head.

The overwhelming feeling of pure pain, fear and hatred upon myself — everything broke out in a display on my face. My lip quaked before my cheeks screwed up in effort not to cry and then hands were drawn to my flushed face until something cracked within me and I started to cry, breakdown.

"Holy fuck." Colin hissed into the silent room, leaping off the desk, hands outstretched to hug me but he stopped, "I don't— Maybe, you don't want to be touched..."

"It's okay." I whispered as tears fell silently before and without warning, my body collapsed into Colin's outstretched arms as the boy walked towards me in effort to hug me. Knees buckling, strong arms found themselves around my ribcage and to where Colin held me into his heart.

Great bursts of shock waves erupted from my chest as I cried hard and without air. I could feel my own pain, it burnt my skin without remorse.

I barely noticed we were moving before my knees hit the ground gently, Colin slumping himself onto the ground as we clung to each other, two souls daring to be pulled apart.

My hands clenched the back of his black shirt as my arms clung around his neck, my face buried itself into the crook of his neck as I bawled. Colin rocked softly holding my body tightly, a hand to back of my head.

There was gasp as my lungs ached for air but no sound was heard besides cries own body and the rough breathing in my ear from Colin who held me so tightly like if he were to let go, I would stop breathing altogether.

Tears rolled down my cheeks rapidly, Colin's heart thumping extremely fast against my chest but a ringing silence filled my ears.

No one could hear my soul breaking but I wonder if Colin could feel it but he pulled me closer into him in that moment. I rocked with blonde haired guy in the empty economic classroom.

"It's not your fault." Colin voice broke with a pain I didn't need to see to know.

Clutched to a boy who cared too much and who held a girl who cared too little simply because the earth is just too cold and too deathly lonely to be alone.

Only worth living if you have someone to share it with.

—

1000 words of this chapter was deleted and I almost cried [its only 1590]

Hope everyone is having an amazing day / night and if you have ever gone through something like Wonder [or Samantha] I am truely sorry. It is not at any point your fault and you should never feel 'ashamed' to reach out for help. If you ever need me, pm.

Feels on this chapter?

SQUAD NAMES OPTIONS:
[please only choose one and comment a '+' next to it, I suggest reading them all first]

• The McKininators

• The Wonderolins

• Blue Jay

• Wonders of the World

• The McKinin Girls

• Wonderkins

• Colin the caterpillars [lmao dead]

•rays of sunshine

•stuck in reality.inc

• instructors (because 'how to..' )

• MClan [clan as in squad and 'M' for McKinin]

• M&M