~~~Kacchan's POV~~~

It's now Thursday, 13 days until Zu's birthday. We've been at Aato's office for ten minutes now. We had just gotten called into the room and I can tell Deku's nervous. I mean, I don't blame him. We have to talk about... well everything, from the planning to telling the idiots, to the itch, his image issues. This is going to be hard.

"How are you?"

"Scared." I don't blame him.

"Why?"

"I need to talk about this past week." His eyes haven't left the floor, and his tone is as bland as it was when we were first coming here.

"Yes, we do. Where would you like to start?" Before Zu can answer there's a knock on the door.

"It's Shinsou."

"Come in." And he does, he takes a seat next to Izu and waits for them to continue.

"You already know of the planning, what was said, you know of me telling everyone. There isn't anything else."

"He hasn't been eating. At least not as much."

"Kaccha-"

"The next few days after we called, he got the itch. Wanted to be alone, but I gave him an alternative. Then he was saying shit about his body."

"What was the alternative? Shinsou could you get Vivian?" He got up and left.

"He gave me ice cubes covered in red food coloring."

"Did it work?"

"Yeah, it did. Why is Toshi getting Viv?"

"Her quirk can help here. There's a reason she works here, just like Shinsou. They all either want to help or want to be better. Remember that Midoriya." It takes about three minutes until she comes into the room, eye bags trailing after her.

"What's going on?"

"Explain how your quirk works please."

"O-oh well it was named manifestation. I can go through someone's memories and pull out a past them, with the same emotions and thoughts they had when they were that age. How come?"

"Use it on Izuku when I tell you." Wait. Fuck.

"W-what no! Why?"

"Midoriya, describe what you hate about yourself."

"I want to know what you're planning first, Aato."

"You know what I'm planning. Now, are you going to do it? I'm trying to help and this is one way to do it." I know what he's planning, I don't know how I feel about it. Zombie came and sat back down next to Zu, who is currently holding onto my hand for dear life.

"Zu, just do it. Please? You said it yourself that my words wouldn't help you. So try this way." He took a deep breath.

"I-I just don't like me, okay? I don't want to go into detail about it."

"You have to, I assume you did for Kacchan. Just do it here, this is a safe room you know it." He's trying to rial him up.

"My eyes, freckles, body, scars. Everything is ugly okay?"

"Keep going."

"My hair attracted a fucking bunny, my eyes are fucking grass. My scars are stupid shit from a stupid child and an idiotic father. Yet I deserved what he did. My thighs jiggle too much and I wish I could just lose the weight of them, same with my stomach and cheeks being too chubby. The scars are visible and you can feel them and it sucks. My freckles are so misplaced I wish they'd disappear. Nothing fits and I wish I could destroy myself. Is that what you want to hear?"

"Vivian, now." I see her place her hands on Izu's head, one on each side, and she backs away a few moments later.

"I needed him to be able to tell me what he felt before I made her do it, I need to know how he feels before younger him manifested."

"How young am I going?"

"Let's go two months after his fourth birthday."

"W-wait! Aato please don't!" That's right before I found out. Suddenly, a four-year-old Izuku appeared before us. He looks shaken up and scared.

"W-where am I?"

"Hey buddy, it's okay," I try to comfort him.

"Now Midoriya, repeat what you said to him."

"I-I can't."

"Once he disappears, you won't have memory of older you telling him this, so it won't affect you, so do it."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"H-he doesn't deserve this."

"But you do Deku?" That seemed to have gotten the little Izu's attention.

"K-Kacchan?"

"Hey, squirt."

"I- Kacchan I deserve it. But he doesn't need to see the ugliness." I heard the crack in his voice.

"Midoriya either you do it or never talk bad about yourself, if you won't say it to him then don't say it to yourself."

"It's different!" The tears started coming.

"It isn't. He's you and you're him. Stop acting like it's a random little boy." He turns to look at the little boy in front of us. He looks incredibly confused.

"H-hey buddy, can you lift your shirt please?" What's he doing?

"I-I uh, I'm sorry sir, I can not do that."

"Bub, I know what's going on, everyone here done hun." I watch as the little boy's eyes fill with tears and fear.

"N-no, w-where's mama?"

"Mama's the one who brought us here hunny, you're safe, dada isn't here. Please lift your shirt." I watch as he hesitates but ends up doing so. That's when I see the full extent of what he went through before I saw. His body was covered in purple and yellow bruises and red marks matching fists. My heart broke and I heard Vivian gasp. Eyebags seemed stunned along with Aato.

"That's why I can't tell him. Look how much he's been through already, come here bubs," the crying four-year-old waddled his way to Deku, who picked him up and hugged him after setting him in his lap, "you are so strong, and you can be a hero. Trust me. Mama didn't mean what she said, she believes in you. Kacchan doesn't hate you, if you don't believe me ask him."

"You haven't done the exercise yet Midoriya, I hate being like this. But if you can say this about yourself then you can say it to him."

"Just let him disappear. I won't say it to a child."

"You are that child! You say you won't say it to a child, but you are a child. Stop hiding behind that excuse."

"Let it go Aato. I'm not saying it."

"What gives you the right to say it to yourself then? You are that little boy, what you say to yourself you should be able to say to him."

"Drop it. Viv, please make him disappear."

"Not yet. Say it."

"Why do you want me to hurt a child with words that don't involve said child? Why do you want me to tell him that he deserves what his father is doing, that he deserves to feel so alone and unlovable? That he deserves that hand he was dealt. That I find him so fucking ugly that I can't take a shower without wanting to add more marks to myself just to stop the thoughts that this will be why Kacchan leaves. Why must I hurt a child that has no part in this." He realizes what he did and looks down at younger him who seems to be a bit stunned and hurt. He can't do anything but sigh and close his eyes, laying his head on my chest.

"Enough Aato, he did what you wanted, make the squirt disappear." I feel his shoulders shake as the painful realization comes that he just gave Aato what he wanted. Vivian listens to me, apologizing and leaving the room. Zombie came and sat by Izu, grabbing his hand and rubbing his back. I know he can't say Aato was out of line, I can't either. He needed to realize that he can't say something about himself that he wouldn't tell any version of himself. We sat in silence until Aato left the room, so about thirty minutes.

"Zu, are you okay?"

"I'm tired."

"Take a nap, I'll talk to Aato. Don't be mad at him or Viv though, they just want you to see how illogical you were being."

"I know Toshi, I just- there could have been a better way."

"Shh, just go to sleep, love." In the next few minutes, he was asleep.

"Aato stepped over the line didn't he?"

"Yeah, but it was needed, Bakuhoe he needed to understand."

"Was it? Making him feel as though the only way to get out of it was to say what he felt? How would you feel if you had to tell four year old you that you hate everything about him?"

"I guess, but I still feel like he needed to realize that what he said wasn't okay." Aato walked in a few minutes later.

"I'm sorry about that, boys. I hope you understand why."

"He needs to understand, but that didn't make his situation any better," I state as I run my fingers through his hair.

"Bakugou, he needs to realize, this isn't in the best situation, it never is. But in order to pass it, we need to get through it and that means hitting weak spots."

"It doesn't give you the right to poke at his insecurities so bad that he feels forced to tell you," I hissed.

"I didn't have a choice, how would you deal with it?"

"I already did! I only brought it up so you could understand what he's going through!"

"Bakugou, there wasn't anything else to do."

"If that's how you feel you shouldn't be a fucking therapist."

"Thotsk-"

"Am I wrong? If you feel like there aren't other approaches then you shouldn't be in a field of work that needs you to be able to find other approaches."

"If I needed to find another approach that approach would have been the same way you did and that didn't seem to make him realize anything."

"At least I didn't force him to tell a child everything he felt was wrong with it!" I feel Deku shift in my lap.

"K-Kacchan?"

"Shhh love, go back to sleep." And he did, I don't want him up for this conversation.

"Bakugou, I get it. I was in the wrong. But there wasn't a better way that would make him realize that what he said hurt him. I apologize for overstepping but it needed to happen, that's why I'm here to begin with."

"I get that, but this week hasn't been good. He got the itch back, he thought about planning, he broke down and tried to barely eat. This approach should have happened either sooner or later, now wasn't the time. Cause when he wakes up, and actually analyzes the situation, it's gonna get a hell of a lot worse. I don't hate you for doing that, I just wish you would have had a different approach. We just have to try and anticipate his next emotions, moves, and thoughts."

"Right, in these kinds of situations he'll probably shut down, try to detach himself. But he'll latch onto Bakuhoe or myself in the end. What's gonna be the worst time is later tonight, if you want to go home Thotski I can see if I can spend the night. I know you haven't seen your parents in a few days now and I'd like to see him when he isn't scared of saying something you wouldn't like."

"If he's okay with it. Let me text Auntie and see, she may get suspicious but you know how to talk with her. Also, things may get odd, with the fact he'll latch on, he's gonna want to cuddle with you. Also with the nightmares, those are gonna be- fun tonight. It'll probably bring up issues with his dad, don't let him go back to bed without telling you. He won't tell you in the morning no matter what he promises. You wanna watch him eat, he'll fake it if he's the last at the table and throw his plate out a few minutes after you guys leave. With the bathroom, try to take the bottles out beforehand if he's gonna be in there for a while. His anti-depressants are fine because there aren't enough anymore."

"I know the drill, we still have to ask and make sure with him, Mrs. Midoriya, and my parents."

"I know, I just don't want to risk anything. I know it's best if I'm not always staying with him- but I can't leave him alone. What if the one time I do, it's the last time I see him?"

"You can't think like that. He's trying, and he hasn't relapsed. He has made progress."

"I can't help it, he's thought about doing it and he's thought about planning again. I know he's gotten better but it's hard to want to leave him after the past."

"Bakugou, we understand that. But you can't be scared of leaving him, you need to trust him. Maybe not now, but later. If you don't let him breathe one of his fears will come true."

"I know, just- what if the one time I leave he goes through with it. I don't want that risk."

"That means you don't have trust in him getting better."

"Would you? He wanted to kill himself for the past eight or so years, got the idea on a foolproof plan, wanted to go through with it, and wanted to cut. Do you really think I want to lose him after just now getting him back?"

"We get it, Zu is working on getting better. We just need to try our best to allow him to grow and get out of the mindset." I check the time and see that there's only a little bit left so I shake him awake.

"Love, it's almost time to go."

"Mmm kay," he mutters but stays on my lap, eyes closed.

"Zu, I'm thinking Toshi should stay the night with you instead of me."

"O-okay... that's fine," it didn't sound like it was fine.

"What's wrong love?"

"D-do you want to leave me? I-," his voice cracks and it hurts, "I understand. J-just-"

"Hey, baby no. I'm not leaving you. I never want to leave you, we just think that I'm smothering you a bit too much that you're gonna start feeling like you depend too much on me and your fear of that will come true. With that, we don't want to make you stay alone with everything that's happened so eye bags suggested for him to stay so I can see my folks. He's okay with you cuddling him if need be and we've gone over a few things. Please never think I'm leaving you."

"O-okay," I can still hear the sadness in his voice over the thought of losing me. I lean down, turning his face more towards me, and give him a passionate kiss, trying to give him some reassurance.

"I'm not leaving you, love, this is just so we can still watch you and be there for you but also for you to not feel like you're depending on me as much. I promise that's the only reason I'm going through with this because I know you don't want to depend on anyone."

"Midoriya, I wanted to apologize. I know you didn't want to even think about saying those things to you as a kid, but there wasn't another way I could think of. Bakugou tried before and it didn't help so the last choice was to get you to say it to someone who you care about and see how they react. But we couldn't have used Shinsou or Bakugou because they don't have the same history. I understand that it was hard and it truly did hurt you, but what you said about yourself to Bakugou hurt him also. I don't want to hurt you, but if you couldn't say it to younger you then how can you say it to now you?"

"I-I know it hurt him. But it hurts me just as much knowing that because all of that is true leaves a chance to be left alone in this darkness. I don't wanna be alone."

"You aren't alone, and you never will be Zu. You have me, Zombie, Pikachu, Shitty hair, Jirou, and Alien."

"Ahh yes, speaking of that group. How'd they take the news?"

"I tried leaving out the horrid details and allowed them to ask questions. They ended up putting the pieces together and Jirou had asked about dad, right on the nose heh. I told them, Kiri asked if mom knew Denks wanted to tell her. I got sent into a spiral and clung to Denks because of it. And that's all I remember."

"Jirou blamed herself. For setting you in that spiral. When we had come downstairs she was the only one who wasn't looking at us. So I had set you down, and asked her to come outside. There she confided in me and said that she shouldn't have pushed and that you didn't deserve it. She was a crying mess. But I said no one deserves it, and how someone would have caught on no matter what. I gave her a tight hug and tried my best to reassure her and we came back inside."

"T-thanks Kacchan. I never meant for them to feel like that."

"Hey, you didn't make them feel like that, it's a sucky situation and it just made her sad."

"Don't forget, if you guys are going through with the plan you need to ask."

"R-right, I'll text mom, Kacchan can you still have dinner with us," he asked as he gave the biggest puppy dog eyes.

"Sure love, I'll text the hag and tell her I'm coming home tonight, eye bags?"

"Yep, texting dad right now, they may be on patrol though so it might take a few seconds." I shoot the text to the hag and inform her, and everyone else texts who they need.

"Dad said yeah, just told me to keep my phone on in case anything happens."

"Mom has some questions but is okay with it."

"Same with the hag." All we have to do now is wait, eyebags' dad had dropped off a bag for him before auntie came. Aato had talked to Zu a bit, trying to better analyze him. I went over some things with zombie to make sure nothing happens. Auntie showed up thirty minutes after we had made the plans, talking with Aato a bit. We say our goodbyes and take our leave.

"Midoriya!"

"Hey Viv," he says, a bit sad.

"I'm sorry, i-if I had known I wouldn't have-"

"It's fine, I get it, you work here and Aato asked you to. It's fine." He walked over and gave her a hug, she had started tearing up a bit.

"I-I didn't know Zu."

"I know hun, it's fine. I'm fine, and we're fine. I'm not mad. But it is time for me to go home. I'll see you in a week."

"A-alright, see you." We finally walked out, and got into the car. Eyebags sat in the back with us, Zuku in the middle.

"What happened today? Why is Katsuki going home, do you guys fight?"

"T-today wasn't the best day. B-but Kacchan and I didn't have a fight."

"Aato had asked Vivian to do something, that was for the best intention but it had hurt Zu to go through. We don't want him to be alone tonight, not that he is with you- just he gets nightmares and likes to cuddle and he needs to tell someone about it and they're usually stuff that you don't know about. Sorry ma'am, it's Midoriya's idea not to tell you, he feels it's for the best and it's nothing against you. He just doesn't want to hurt anyone. But the reason Bakuhoe is going home is because one of Midoriya's fears is to depend on someone too much and we fear that it's starting to happen with Thotski, and we don't want him to see it that way."

"Alright, I just wish one day you'll be able to tell me Izu, you won't hurt me. I don't want you in this pain anymore."

"I-I know mama, b-but it'll put you in pain."

"I don't want you in pain baby! You deserve a childhood, you deserve to live your life instead of wanting to die because of something I don't know! Sweetie, I'd be fine with the pain, you don't need to be strong and hold on to it because you're scared I can't handle it." Zu's breath got heavy, not with fear but with trying to hold back his tears.

"M-mama, you deserve to be happy. Let me deal with this. Please."

"Baby, you're a child. You shouldn't need to deal with it, you deserve to be happy."

"W-when dad gets back you'll be happy again."

"Deku," I warn under my breath, taking his hand into mine and squeezing it slightly.

"I don't need him to be happy, baby. I've got you."

"N-no, you- you need dad. A-and he'll be ho-home soon," shit, he's fighting.

"Izuku, back down from this, you'll start an attack," I whisper in his ear once again.

"N-no I'm fine-"

"Midoriya?"

"Y-yeah-?"

"Enough, stop talking about it," zombie whispers, using his quirk to stop him. I knock him out of it after he's calmed down and it seems what the caffeine addict did was the last straw before he started crying. It was a silent cry, but I could tell it was hurting him not letting it out, his throat was tensing to a painful level. I gently grab him and set him on my lap, cradling him against me.

"Shh, I know love, you're hurting. Let it out baby," I whisper into his ear, running my hands against his back, rocking a little bit back and forth. It's always a heartbreaking scene to watch when he breaks himself, it's usually when he states how everyone is better off without him, and how people will be happier with someone else. That's what hurts me the most, it also hurts thinking he'll think auntie will choose the asshat before him. It takes him until we're on our street to calm back down, still gulping in breaths to regain control.

"Are you okay now Midoriya?" Deku didn't say anything, he just signed yes.

"R-right, sorry."

"W-wait no. Toshi I'm sorry! I-I'm confused right now. Don't feel bad, I know it was for my own good," his voice cracks a bit.

"I shouldn't have used my quirk. It's only used as a last resort, I just didn't want you to go into an attack and that was the only way I could think to stop it."

"I-it's done and over with," and he walks into the house.

"How bad did I screw up?"

"He may be mad for an hour, but when the thoughts start, he's gonna want you. He won't want to be alone."

"Right, well let's go?" I nodded and we took off. When we walked into the house Zu wasn't anywhere downstairs.