~~~Kacchan's POV~~~

"I'll be fine, j-just leave me alone." He's shutting down.

"Deku, calm down. No one's making you the bad guy, we aren't trying to put words in your mouth. Please don't shut down."

"I-I'm fine Kacchan." Fuck, there's a chance I might yell and I don't want to but dammit I need him to listen.

"Zu, you aren't fine. Please don't shut down, we weren't trying to twist your words. Aato messed up his wording."

"W-what evidence do y-you have?"

"I can see your brain going a mile a second at this point, I can see the pain flashing through your eyes every few seconds. I can see you resisting the urge to scratch."

"Midoriya, I know my wording was off, and I'm sorry. I know I should have found different wording but there wasn't much thought. You don't do it, your brain does. I know it's weird to explain, but when you hear something, the part that argues that side twists the words of the person to be snidely. Right?"

"I guess."

"When I was talking about it, I referred to it as though it was you, but everyone here knows you don't have a choice. I apologize for wording it incorrectly."

"N-no, you don't need to apologize. I'm overreacting."

"Zu, please you aren't overreacting. Overreacting is what I did with Shitty hair, you had a normal reaction."

"J-just stop. I-I'm fine."

"No you aren't Midoriya, you are shaking, tears are threatening to fall, you're still resetting the urge to scratch, you're eyes are duller now, and you seem to be having an argument."

"Eyebags isn't wrong. What's going on love?"

"I-I just want to be alone. I-I'm fine really."

"Stop with the bullshit. You're hurting yourself and us. You're shutting down because of miswording trying to justify another reason for the idea of leaving and that hurts." Something's off, my throat's tighter, and my chest feels almost empty? No that's not it, maybe it's too full? Or something's clenching? I don't know but I don't like it.

"I-I, Kacchan-" He stops himself. Almost as though he doesn't know what to say.

"Say your thoughts Midoriya, you can't hold it in and no one's going to hold it against you." I shifted where I am, I was standing next to his dresser, in front of his closet. And I shift to where I'm sitting by Zu, I need to be here for him. He looks up when he feels the bed divot, and I nod my head to the right so he knows that he can come here. He takes up the offer and lays his head on my lap, one of my hands goes to his hair and he's taking deep breaths as he holds my other hand, I gently rub circles against the back of his palm, trying to encourage him.

"I-I don't know. M-my thoughts are so fast and the ones sticking out far enough to grab are about my past or what the other sides saying to me, or- or it's the thoughts telling me t-to go through with i-it. I can't w-win and it's giving me a headache." His voice sounds strained, as though he's trying to hold back tears and I know he is.

"Say the words you think, no filter just say them." Damn Aato, what the hell are you going to get from this.

"A-Aato, what's the point in this?"

"I've noticed when you say the words out loud you tend to find the words that hurt the most, which can help us try and get rid of said thoughts."

"You pulled that out of your ass. What's the real reason?"

"He doesn't say what thoughts occur until after, that way he can filter them, I really do need to hear the unfiltered thoughts so I know ways to cancel them." Even though I can't see him, I can tell he's giving that stupid look saying 'trust me, I've been doing this.' I hate it.

"T-that isn't going to help. R-really I'm fine." His head shot up at a knock on the door.

"It's Kaminari and Jirou, can we come in?"

"No-" I begin but get rudely cut off by Deku.

"Yeah, doors unlocked." The door opens with Pika and Earphones. They walk closer to us, about three feet away before they stop.

"We wanted to check-in, I know today hasn't been a good day for you Zu. Jirou wanted to come and try to offer some comfort. Mina and Kirishima wanted to also, but we didn't want too many people to crowd you so we decided it'd be best for me, seeing as I know you better than the others, and Jirou because she isn't too noisy or-"

"What he means is that we want to check in on you and see if you need anything, something to drink, some cuddles, music. We just want you to know you're not alone, and we know you have Bakugou here and Shinsou but sometimes it's good to have a female present."

"T-thank you guys, honestly I'm fine so no worries. I-I'm sorry today didn't go as much to plan, I-I swear it'll be better."

"None of that Izu, Jirou and I, we understand. And so does Kiri and Mina."

"Midoriya, you need to tell me still."

"I'm guessing that's Aato?" Deku just nods.

"Zu, I can ask them to wait with the others until you're ready."

"T-they deserve to know why w-we did this. Denks c-can you get Kiri and M-Mina?" I sigh and Zu gestures to Eyebags to sit at his desk and for Music to sit on the bed. To which she takes.

"Midoriya, I understand you want them to know, but are you sure you want to tell them? Besides, is now a good time? I still need you to say your thoughts without a filter."

"You want to know my thoughts?"

"It's a way to figure out how to help you. I hate seeing you in the type of pain you put yourself through and I want to help. I hate making you say everything out loud but none of us are mind readers. We need you to voice yourself or we can't help you."

"It's the same thoughts as every other time. Just louder to the point it feels as though a headache is pursuing and it hurts. As a way to try and distract myself I tap my collarbone and allow myself to listen to the hollowness of my bone, but in doing so it makes me wonder what else is hollow. What I'm faking. My thoughts go down a rabbit hole that never changes, one minute my brain is letting me be happy the next it's shoving the flashbacks down my throat as if to try and choke me. My breakdowns feel the same way, I try to hide them so the lump in my throat and tightening in my chest feels as though I'm dying and I can't help but wish it were true on days like this. Days where I ruin Kacchan's day, when Shinsou has to walk on eggshells so I don't get triggered, where I need to watch where I am so I don't scare off Jirou, Mina, Denki, or Kirishima with how bad everything can get, so those are my thoughts. I just wish I wasn't a burden."

"Midoriya, you aren't a burden, I may have just met you but how could I possibly see you as a burden when you're so lovable and caring? The fact you're so worried about everyone here having a good time even though your mind is fucking you over proves just that. I get the thoughts, the thoughts on feeling like all you do is disappoint, but as long as you're doing your best, fuck whoever says otherwise. Because they don't know you or your battle, and your brain, sometimes the brain goes on a tangent to work you up because it wants self-destruction, but you got this. We're friends, and we can help each other, so let us in."

"Jirou, I think it is, is correct. No one here will judge you for what you're going through, they might not know everything but that doesn't mean they won't support you. I'm sure Shinsou doesn't feel as though he needs to walk on eggshells and Bakugou for a fact never has his days ruined by you. The thoughts, I don't know what helps you personally because you deflect, but maybe try music or talking to people, I'm always free to talk when you need help. You're not faking anything. You use that as a way to try and undermine your issues, to try and make you feel as though you don't deserve to feel this way. But you do, you don't need validation to feel the ways you do because you think others have it worse. You aren't a burden, everyone who is with you right now, everyone who's stayed after everything. They did it because they want to."

"Yeah Midobro, we might not know everything, or what the dude on the phone said all the way, but we're here because we want to be. No one forced us and you didn't guilt us to stay. You gave options for us to leave if we wanted to."

"And as Jirou said, it might help to have girls around, no offense boys, but most of you don't seem to have as much of a soft side that Zu might need."

"I agree with the new voices in the room, Midoriya. It's important to let others help you. I know it's hard and that you will argue that you don't want it. But you are important to people, there are people who love you and care about you. If you need anything I'm a call away, but I'm assuming you're going to talk with the others. It was nice to meet everyone, I'm Aato by the way."
"A-alright Aato, I'll see you Thursday, sorry we called."

"You don't need to apologize, have a good night." And with that, he hung up. Deku motions for the three that appeared to sit on the bed with us.

"S-so, I have depression. I-I've been seeing a t-therapist for a little o-over five months now, A-Aato to be specific. I-I started taking anti-d-depressants for only a d-day now. Feel free t-to ask me anything." I'm rubbing his back, watching as he braces himself for what might be asked. I was tempted to say he doesn't need to do this, but he knows that already. The first one to speak is Pikachu.

"What happened?" It's such a basic question but it holds a lot of weight for Deku.

"When?"

"Can you start from the beginning?"

"W-what are you r-referring to? Like the s-start of the entire t-thing, or the start of t-this week?" Shitty hair's the next one to speak up.

"If you don't mind, can you start from the beginning? Of everything? I want to understand you better and I completely understand if you need to leave things out."

"Is everyone else okay with this? If you don't want to listen I can take you to the living room and we can chill out there until the others come." Of course Eyebags is the one to offer that, but I'm glad. The story isn't the best and Zu might break down. But surprisingly no one takes it up. That could be because they are nosey bastards but if Deku's okay with telling them then, fine.

"F-first I want to p-preface this with, I'm s-sorry things got to t-this point, I didn't w-want to be like t-this during our hang-o-out."

"Babe, it's fine. Those who weren't ready for this had the option to go with Zombie. And remember I'm here, if you need me."

"S-starting with when I-I was four I guess. Mom and I c-came back from the doctor w-with bad news, nothing t-that would injure me o-or anything, just news t-that brought negative emotions. D-dad didn't like said news a-and gave me the s-silent treatment. T-things didn't get better, Kacchan bullied me, b-but the others were worse. T-then dad left around three years ago. And a little under a y-year ago I had t-tried attempting. M-mom found something disheartening f-five or so months ago and w-went to seek help and that s-same day I met Shin and Aato, along with that K-Kacchan and I reconnected. A-and since then I've been trying to g-get better." He took long and short pauses between a lot of the information, whether it was to ground himself or to let everything set in was unclear. I continued rubbing his back, and held his left hand. Part of the way through it Pika went and held the right hand. We sat in silence for a few moments until Alien broke it.

"What was the news?"

"I-I was pronounced-"

"Izuku, you don't need to tell if you don't wish to." He knows Eyebags.

"I'm answering the questions asked. I was pronounced q-quirkless." His gaze shifted down and unconsciously started leaning towards me as he allowed the information to sink in once more.

"So that's why you weren't scared for Bakubabe, when the blond bimbo wanted to use your quirk."

"Y-yeah, Kacchan and I don't usually fight with his q-quirk so w-we don't have an incident l-like we did one of the last times." I watch as Shitty hairs gears turn as he thinks back.

"Bakubro was referring to you when he stated he won't be used as a surrogate. But why?"

"T-the thing mom found were cuts and scars. I-I've been trying to s-stay clean with the help of K-Kacchan and everyone. B-but that didn't stop the i-itch, and a week ago o-or so Kacchan and I had sparred. A-and I had sorta forced h-him to use his quirk, a-although it was only to regain his balance I-I still managed to get him to burn me. A-and as a result I have this scab on my c-cheek and he refuses to u-use his quirk when sparring, u-unless he knows I won't pull the same thing."

"M-Midoriya, you said things didn't get better. A-after your dad giving the silent treatment. What did you mean?" Earphones... fuck.

"M-my-"

"Izuku, you have every right to not answer the question if you do not wish to. They'll understand." He knows that.

"I-I know Toshi. B-but I want to be c-completely open s-so they know what t-they're getting into. D-dad didn't s-stop at the silent t-treatment. H-he," he takes a deep breath and leans even closer to me, "he w-was upset about m-my fate a-and upset about mom p-paying more attention to me. S-so he," another deep breath that was slightly more jagged, "h-he started h-hitting me." I felt his shoulders shake and his breathing becomes more uneven. So I pull him on to me, rubbing his shoulders and hugging him.

"Does your mom-" Zu cut Sharky off before he could continue.

"No! A-and she won't ever b-be told."

"Why," Pinky asked.

"I-I-I," he pauses and takes a deep breath as I rub his shoulder a little more to try and calm him, "m-mom needs him."

"Midoriya," Eyebags tries to warn.

"From what I can tell he doesn't give a rats ass about either of you seeing as he left three years ago and I'm pretty damn sure that your mom cares more about you than him."

"Denks-"

"No, you won't convince me, and I'm pretty damn sure I speak for everyone else when I say you won't convince anyone else here." He's slightly shaking, and he keeps shaking his head.

"That's enough, if you idiots still have questions try later, go to bed it's almost three-thirty in the morning. I'm gonna calm him down."

"S-sorry Izu, I-I didn't mean to-" Zu doesn't speak, but he does launch himself to Pika, cuddling into him, arms wrapped around his neck, as the idiot wraps one around his back and the other brushing through his hair. Deku's face is buried into his shoulder and the blond tries to relax him, everyone but Zombie and I leave to go to bed, feeling the tiredness wash over them.

"Shh, it's okay Zuku, let it out. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to go there." As the words are said he clutches tighter to the blond, and you can see his shoulders wrack with the sobs. I know he wants to say something, but he can't so all he does is hold tighter, try to at least. Slightly nodding as if to say it's okay. The blond never stopped running his hand through his hair, and is now rubbing circles on my boyfriend's back, slightly rocking side to side. This goes on for ten more minutes before he passes out.

"I-I'm really sorry Bakugou, Shinsou. I d-didn't know he t-thought that way."

"Kami- no, it's not your fault. We don't blame you. Thank you for not pushing him away, you were probably best this time."

"He's not wrong, and Zu didn't mean to upset you. I know it's evident but don't beat yourself up over it. We left you in the dark and we should have known someone would bring it up."

"I still should have realized that he would think that way. I wasn't blind to how he felt. I just..."

"We get it Kami, we've tried going that route, his brain tells him different and it hurts because it also makes him feel as though he deserved it all."

"The bastard broke him, and we can't fix it easily. We're working on everything and that's what matters, here I can take him downstairs and you can go to sleep."

"Why?"

"I don't know Kaminari, I've been thinking about it since we were four. But nothing lines up. Maybe he just wanted power." I walked over to grab Izu as I stated it. I tried to pick him up, but he clung tighter to the idiot. He rubbed his back to get him to relax. I hate how rough my love's life has been, he didn't deserve it. I hate to wake him, but Pika boy's tired and I can tell. So I slightly shake him.

"Hey, baby can you let go of Pikachu? I'll take you downstairs and you can go back to bed, just let Kaminari go please."

"Hm? Otay, love." His voice is soft and laced with sleepiness. He does let the idiot go and I grab him, promptly koalaing to me, stuffing his face to my neck, and inhaling.

"Awww, now that's adorable." I rolled my eyes at the off-brand lightning bolt, as we headed downstairs. We get there and see everyone still awake.

"Hey Bakubro, how is he?"

"Tired, shouldn't you idiots be asleep?"

"W-we were worried that we pushed Midoriya with our questions."

"He wanted to answer them, he felt bad for keeping us in the dark. I know it's hard to think we didn't push him, but he doesn't want us to think that. That's why he kept telling Shinsou he wanted to answer them."

"We know Kami, but we knew today wasn't a great day. We should have waited."

"Raccoon eyes, he would've shut you out and rationalize that he would just gain pity from you guys, he would feel like he hurt you by telling his story. Just let's sleep and we'll deal with everything tomorrow, alright?" It's still bright enough from the t.v that I can see her and Shitty hair cuddled up to each other as she nods, earphones looking down as though she feels like she did something wrong. I set Deku on our area, covering him up and kissing his forehead.

"Oi, MP3 chick, come here real quick." She looks up, and silently get's off the cot, I gesture for her to come with me to the porch.

"Y-yeah?"

"Don't beat yourself up. He answered them because he wanted to."

"B-but I'm the one that a-asked about it!"

"I get that, but one of you were going to catch on," I look up and see the tears forming, shit, "H-hey, none of that. Come here." I beckon them towards me, they move slowly, scared of what I'll do. When they got close enough I wrapped my arms around them.

"I-I'm sorry. I d-didn't mean to make h-him tell us-"

"Hey, let it out Jirou. It's not your fault and you didn't make him say anything." I run my fingers through her hair, her arms tightly wrapped around my torso, face in my chest. Shut up, I can be soft with more than Izu.

"Hun, you can't beat yourself up over this. I know you want to because you feel like you forced him to say everything and forced him to break down or go past his comfort point, but you didn't. Listen to me, he did this of his free will. He wanted to and you couldn't have stopped him if you wanted to." Her shoulders shake.

"Talk about it."

"W-what?"

"Something hit too deep, talk about it."

"I-I just, Midoriya seems so happy most of the time. A-and he seems r-really nice. S-so why him?"

"Why anyone? People do things for power. They want power over others and they view things like that as a way to get it. They don't have many morals, if any. No one deserves any of the shit that happens, no one deserves death, or sexual assault, or abuse. No one. And you waste time saying it made them stronger because they don't need to be strong, they need to be safe no matter what age, and people don't understand that. Deku, he's happy so others are happy. He tries his best to make everyone happy so they don't feel how he does. He's nice so no one has to worry about the ugliness of the world when it comes to being with him, because he knows that too well."

"I-I guess. Thank you Bakugou."

"Jirou, I understand wanting answers as to why it's always the best people that bad shit happens to. I'm not going to sit here and let you feel like him telling his story and hurting because of something out of your control is your fault, because it isn't. He was given a shitty start with a shitty sperm donor but we're working on making the future better."

"R-right." She gives me one last hug before we head back inside.