~~~~Kacchan's POV~~~

Today was the last day of school, I can't believe it's already June, I can't believe it's almost Izu's birthday. We did a little bit for mine, but I know he wasn't expecting to make it to fourteen. I want to make him feel special. I've been helping him for five months, and I'm glad I have been. I've also been thinking on asking him out but never got the chance, he asked me out first. I can't believe our mom's put a bet on our relationship. I knew the minute he had the first breakdown he was going to want to end things, but the second one just made him confirm it. But Aato helped. It hurts seeing him have to go through that, wanting to be alone so he doesn't hurt anyone. But the true reason he wants to be alone is so he could end it, I know. That's why I don't leave him alone, even if he yells or punches. He's never actually punched me out of anger, but he has landed a few good ones while we're training. I never noticed his eating habits, that's what hurt the most. I'm meant to keep an eye on him yet I let him barely eat for two months. How didn't I notice? Why can't I take his pain?

"Hey Shinsou?"

"Yeah?" I met Shinsou back in March, he didn't stay very long, just enough that he got the answers out of Deku.

"Tell me about yourself? If you're okay with it of course." That's Zuku for ya, so considerate of others until it comes to himself.

"I don't think we have the time for that, there's only about thirty-five minutes left."

"Aato?"

"We're done, the rest of the time is yours." We always seem to end off with at least thirty minutes after the sesion.

"Shinsou?"

"Fine, whatever kid." He has a smile on his face when he said it, the first time he's smiled around either of us. He always looked tired and sad, like he hated a part of himself.

"Well I'm almost fourteen, I hate my quirk," when he said that I saw Aato shoot him a look, "yeah yeah I know, I help Aato with kids who don't open up. Um, I was adopted by two pro's Shota Aizawa and Yamada Hazashi. Erm, that's all I can think of. How about you Midoriya?"

"You can't tell me your quirk or how it works can you?"

"Sorry kid, if you knew then I wouldn't be able to help Aato with you."

"I get it, um well you know a lot about me actually."

"True, tell me your favorites?" Color is green, food is katsudon, subject is literature, and hobby is reading.

"Hmm, well I like the color green, I love literature and reading. I like taking notes on heroes and their quirks, helps me know fighting styles and ways to help."

"Then why did you do a page on me?" Huh, Aato usually leaves when he's done.

"I like studying quirks also, and besides at first I was trying to see a way around yours, until Kacchan kinda forced me to stop."

"Did you find a way?"

"From what I could tell, you have to focus extremely well to get it, you also need them to talk for it to work. When you start to use it, you make sure that your glasses cover your eyes so I think the big tell is in your eyes, kinda like EraserHead's is his hair and he uses the yellow goggles to make sure no one can tell who's quirk he's stopping."

"How do you know so much on Aizawa? He hates the press."

"O-oh, well I tend to find the villain attacks and I've seen him a few times, I'm assuming Aizawa is EraserHead, and I've picked up a few tells from him along with a fighting style he uses."

"Deku, there's ten minutes left."

"Oh! Right, um nice getting to know you Shinsou, I hope we could be friends." He gets off of me, much to my dismay, and walks over to the purple haired racoon handing him a piece of paper and giving him a slight hug. Although he's surprised he hugs back, chuckling slightly.

"Go back to your boyfriend before I steal you." He ruffles his hair slightly, I can't help but let small explosions out of my hands.

"Calm down Kacchan, he's joking."

"Maybe." We all kinda laugh a little, by now I see a smile on Izu and racoon boy's face. I pull Deku to me when he gets close enough.

"Mine." That caused everyone to laugh again.

"Relax explosive, I don't plan on anything, he's happy with you. Although he is cute, I have a thing for loud blonds, even though dad doesn't want me to, and I refuse to take anyone's happiness away."

"Alright racoon face, and damn right he's cute, look at his face!" I grab his face making him look at me while I squeeze his chubby cheeks slightly.

"Kacchan." He's whining cute.

"I see what you mean, but again loud blonds." I chuckle and we hear a knock on the door.

"Come in Inko."

"Hi boys, are you guys ready?"

"One second Inko alright?"

'Okay Aato."

"Izuku, would you like our meetings to be every other week?"

"U-um..."

"We don't have to, I just think it would make things easier on you. But if you don't want to, that's fine, they will continue like they have."

"C-can we keep it like this?"

"Of course."

"Thank you."

"Hey, no need for thanks, remember-"

"I'm not causing any trouble by letting someone help me, I know but... I still feel like a burden."

"Izuku, look I remember when we first met, but everyone here cares about and loves you. You even dug your way into Shin's cold unbeating heart-"

"HEY!"

"No one is forced to help you, we all truly care about your well being."

"Kid, hate to admit it but he's right. Look at Bakuhoe, he was the first to get you to willingly talk, your mom was the one to save you by bringing you here, I was the one who got you to admit your feelings towards explodo over there, and Aato was the one who tried to make sure you were taken care of."

"I know, I just... you guys take time out of your days just to help me when there are other things to address, like the truth behind the scenario Aato told me, or you needing to love your quirk, even if I don't know what it is I know it's incredible. Or Kacchan, you could be hanging out with your friends but stay with me instead, and mom, you could be trying to see if you can get dad home faster." My grip tightened as he said that and analyzing the room, Shinsou and Aato got nervous and weren't being secretive about it.

"Izu, you don't have to mention him." I make sure it's out of earshot of auntie.

"Hey Inko, can I talk to the boys for a moment?" She nods her head and leaves.

"Admit it, if I wasn't here he'd be with mom."

"Izuku, stop. I know that's how you feel but if your mother knew what he did she would rather you than him."

"He's the love of her life." I feel the tremors shake against me. I pull him closer moving my hand to his hair.

"Kid, look at me." He slowly moves his head to Shinsou.

"Y-you can't tell m-me it isn't t-true."

"Midoriya, you need to calm down, breathing so heavy isn't good, breath with Bakugou." I start to do the normal breathing we do when he goes into a panic attack.

"Now listen to me kid, tell me that if you weren't here, things would be better. That Bakuhoe would be happier without you, that your mother would be happy she never had you. But if you say it, it better be true. Now are you going to argue or are you going to back down and remember that you are loved?"

"B-but-"

"Kid, tell me the truth, the one that you believe with all your heart. Do you believe that everyone surrounding your life would be happier without you?" Shit he's using his quirk, but he isn't going to like the answer.

"Honestly?"

"Yes."

"Honestly, I feel like everyone would have it a hundred times better if I either didn't exist or killed myself years ago. Kacchan wouldn't need to worry about my dad or me hurting myself. Aato wouldn't have to deal with such a stubborn patient, you wouldn't have to come in here and force answers out of me muchless be my friend. My mom wouldn't have to worry about me dying from my own unachievable dream or my own fucking hands. My father, although he's a bastard, wouldn't have to worry about having a quirkless gay son who can't do anything right. So yes, I think everyone in my fucking life would be better without me in it." I feel the tension in his shoulders as he starts to cry, Aato and Shinsou look surprised, I expected this type of answer, I didn't want it but I knew I didn't have a choice.

"Kiddo, that's not true-"

"R-really? You say i-it's not true yet I o-once again c-caused you guys to w-worry, even though I t-thought I was b-better." I pull him in, breaking the quirk connection, he turns into my chest fisting my shirt trying to grasp onto reality.

"Izuku, yes that scenario has more meaning to it than I meant. But I've dealt with it. Shinsou's working on liking his quirk, it's a reason he's here in the first place, seeing how he can fix issues within the person who refuses to ask and he willingly wants to be your friend, I can tell in the way he jokes with you. Being gay or quirkless isn't something to be ashamed of, being you isn't a sin. Your mother loves you dearly and hates seeing you hurt, and after today's events she's probably wondering what makes you hate being here. Katsuki over there, he loves you more than anything, he has friends yes, but he chooses to help you because he can't live without you. Your father, he can go fuck himself, pardon me, but something you cannot control isn't your fault and he had no right laying a hand on you."

"I deserved it." I barely heard what he said, but I heard it and my heart broke.

"What was that?"

"I deserved everything that bastard did to me, I deserved every bruise that he left, I deserve every bruise I get when training, and I deserved every line on my wrist. I'm sorry but I can't keep pretending that I hate what that bastard did, I talk back, I hate myself. Why would anyone like me? I'm a useless, worthless idiotic person who doesn't deserve all the love I have." He tried removing himself from my arms, but I tightened them.

"Shut up."

"Why, you hate me." A stab to my heart as he tried to move again.

"What's causing the thoughts?" Shinsou, he's trying to bait him.

"It's no one's business."

"Izuku, what's causing the fucking thoughts." He's pissed and using his quirk, shit.

"My dad's coming home soon, he's going to tell me the same things. Might as well prepare myself."

"Let me guess, next you're going to try and break up with Bakuhoe."

"I mean, if this doesn't prove I'm not ready I don't know what the hell does."

"Are you wanting to end things with him?"

"Yeah," another stab to my heart, "dad will kill me and him the moment he finds out about us. So why make Kacchan suffer?"

"Stop, can't you fucking see that you are better?"

"No."

"Why?"

"The bastard."

"He isn't here, he won't be here for a while, you're putting up an act to make sure things will change."

"Whatever, why does it matter?"

"Dammit, explosion you take over." So I pull him in. He's hurt I know.

"Izu, listen, stop thinking. I'm not leaving, I know I said if you got worse I would, but this is an act. You want to protect me, I understand. But I'm here to stay. And I just want you to know that this means nothing, that little episode out the window. I know today's a bad day, and I know not all of that was an act, but I don't care. You'll have days like this, and you need to not push us away. I love you too much to lose you." I feel my shirt dampen, his body's violently shaking.

"I-I can't stop the memories, K-Kacchan I remember every little detail, from the hits to my cuts. I can't stop them." My heart's crumbling as I hear his broken voice, begging for help.

"Seeing as the meeting's over, Shinsou, can you meet us at the park tomorrow, I'll send the name, Aato I'll update you when we sort things out, he's exhausted from how little he's eaten, and it's having him go through different stages of his own grief."

"Y-yeah, I can do that. I'll tell dad when I get home."

"Katsuki? Are you sure you can handle him? He isn't stable."

"I know, that's why I'm the best option, I'll keep an eye on him." I look down to see he's already passed out.

"Fine, make sure he eats something."

"I know, I'll go get auntie." I carry Izu as I make my way to Vivian, who's talking to auntie.

"Sorry to interrupt, but Izu had a bad episode, I'll let him sleep until we get home, but he does need to eat."

"Has he not eaten all day?" I give a sad smile.

"Auntie, he hasn't eaten much the past two months." She starts to tear up.

"How didn't I notice? How did he get away with it?"

"I don't know, but that alone is the reason today was bad, barely any food and the stress from exams, they don't mix well. He even tried to break up with me because he said he isn't better enough yet. But tomorrow me and Shinsou are going to talk to him. We'll help him."

"O-okay, I can make his favorite meal, I have everything at home."

"I'll make it auntie, you need to relax. Let me help both of you." With a nod of her head we left, getting in the car and driving home, I carried Izu to his room where auntie followed, taking his phone, playing some of his recording. I gave them both a kiss on their foreheads and went to make dinner. This family... It's like something's missing. He's always smiling, but I guess learning about his dad's return broke him. I know he's scared, he's terrified of anyone who looks stronger than him, except a few, any real pro, Shinsou and myself. Aato isn't a very big guy, so he didn't pose much of a threat. Why can't I just tell auntie? Why can't Izu just let me love him, why can't he stop pushing? The thoughts slowly started getting softer, until I was left with silence. After a few minutes the katsudon was done. I walk upstairs, going to Deku's room.

"Hey, Izu it's time to eat." I lightly shake him.

"Not hungry."

"Izuku, get out of bed and eat, no more skipping meals." He tensed at that.

"M-mom, ho-"

"I had to tell her. You passed out three times Izu, and I needed a way to explain what happened earlier."

"Come on Izu, let's eat dinner, like we used to before you were announced quirkless." He flinched at the word said by another person he disappointed, but he got up staring down at his feet and auntie went downstairs.

"Hey, she doesn't hate you."

"But she does. She hates the person I became."

"We can talk more later, let's eat, we're seeing Shinsou tomorrow."

"Okay." He goes to head out the door.

"Oi, nerd."

"What?"

"Not gonna kiss me?" That made him smile slightly, coming over to me placing a gentle peck on my lips. With that we went down to eat, thankfully he ate more than he has been.

"What happened Izu?"

"It was just school."

"Izuku, there's another factor."

"I'll be fine, I'm trying. It was just a bad area."

"Talk to Katsuki then, stop keeping it in please."

"I-I'm sorry mom."

"Hey, let's just eat, auntie I know you love him but there will be times that this happens, we just have to look for triggers." Like the asshole who started this all.

"R-right, I'm sorry." We all ate in silence after that. Auntie finished first heading to take a shower, Deku and I finished a few minutes after. Heading up to his room he nudged my hand.

"I'm sorry Kacchan." His voice was so soft and held an emotion I hated, he was ashamed of making people worry.

"Hey, what do I tell you?"

"We're working on it."

"Exactly, come on, we should talk."

"R-right." We headed to his room, sat on his bed, he immediately went to my lap, sitting on me making sure I won't leave. I rub his back and run my fingers through his hair.

"Why didn't you tell me Izu?"

"I was scared."

"Of what?"

"That I'd lose you, I-I don't want this to stop, but he can come home as soon as a month from now." He's shaking, but it's not a breakdown shake, it's from being out right terrified.

"Nothing's going to happen to us. We just have to tell auntie to keep it a secret."

"R-right."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"I know."

"Tell me about the memories."

"I-I keep getting flashes of h-his fist, a-and the blood on m-my wrists. I can't stop them. And it's getting harder to not scratch."

"How can I help?"

"I-I don't know."

"What works?"

"Hitting my head, scratching, our training, and cuddles, but the ones where you're scared I'm leaving."

"I can do that, let's brush our teeth and get ready for bed, okay?"

"O-okay." He heads for the bathroom first, changing in there while I change in his room, then he lays down and I go brush my teeth. When I return, he's sitting up, waiting for me.

"Hey cutie." He giggles and makes grabby arms towards me. Heh, cute. I walk over and pull him on me, he wiggles down a bit so his face is in my neck. I swear I feel him kiss a certain spot a few times, but I'll let it slide.

"Are you tired love?" He just nods, while biting my neck a bit, nerd. I pull him closer as I drift to sleep.