Hello! So i came up with this idea while i was re-watching Arrow and Chicago Med (figures, right). Also because residently i was feeling a little down i channel it into the story so i'm warning you there are trigger subjects such as abuse, self harm, rape and suicide attempts. Be careful and if you battle with any of those (like i have) read with caution!

Enjoy!

Felicity's dad was a soldier who worked as firefighter when he wasn't diploid somewhere but soon he was diploid in Afghanistan. She became one after graduating MIT for four years she worked with them because she was too young to work with QC. When she became twenty years old QC called and she left for Starling City. She was still dropping by House 51 and helped whenever there was a tough call like a terrorist attack or something similar.

But she hasn't been in Chicago for a year now. But recently she's been barely holding it together

Felicity had a rough history with depression and self harm. Growing up with a mum that brought new men every night in the house and having to raise herself and her little sister she lost the ability to know what is the concept of childhood and normality.

She was forced since she was 8 years old to be a mum to her little sister who was nine months old. She was forced to grow up quickly and raise both her and herself. She stopped thinking as an eight-year-old would and try to act as maturely she could.

Her dad, well he was busy fighting in Afghanistan. She knew that her dad had another family, a wife and a son, with whom had divorced so he can be with her mum but it looked like this wedding was going to hell. She was not surprised when it happened although it was not a divorce that destroyed the wedding but death, the death of her dad.

It was the day that broke her, point of origin. It was eight in the morning when the door of her home rang and she run to answer it as a two year old Samantha crawled next to her sister since she was playing with her Barbie doll.

She saw an African American man standing before her, towering over her, with puffy red eyes as he smiled at Felicity's curios eyes.

"He is dead." The man said as he broke down and Felicity stepped aside and allowed the man to walk in the house.

"Who are you?" Samantha asked confused at the man.

"I'm Wallace Boden I was your dad's friend. We worked together in Fire House 51 before he was diploid." The man said with tears as Felicity picked up Samantha and safely held her in her arms not trusting the man before her.

"Okay. So what am I supposed to do? I never knew my dad...sorry mine and Sam's dad. He was never there for us so I don't care about him. He died saving his country well done. He was brave enough to handle war but wasn't strong enough to handle his first marriage or his second...so I owe him nothing! Go tell his other wife see if she'll shed any tear or his son would...who by the way has ten years difference with me and he is in a gang. Have a good day, Mister Boden. I'll make sure to pass the news to my mum if I remember and she is sober enough to register who I am or that I speak English and not Latin like a demon." Felicity rambled angrily at the man before her who stopped and stare at her in shock.

He didn't expect the girl before him, the twelve year old before him, to be so cruel and cold.

"Alright." Boden said slowly as he stood up and walked at the door that Felicity held open with her free arm while in her other held little Samantha who glare at the older man.

"If you ever need help come by House 51, alright? A girl like you shouldn't be so cold at that young age." Boden said softly to Felicity who chuckled darkly.

"I might be twelve years old mister but I can't wait for my funeral...I am so tired of this fucked up world." Felicity said coldly and slammed the door on his shocked face.

That was the point where Felicity realized that something was wrong with her; she was unable to feel anything! Yes, she registered emotions and knew how she should act when but she had to think that she should be feeling emotions on every day bases. She felt nothing.

But she made sure to cover it for Samantha's sake. She knew that.

Samantha should grow up and be a lady who would feel every emotion known to man.

The years went by painfully slowly as she was getting bullied at school and with her need to get an emotion out of herself turned her towards self harm.

Samantha grew up being the total opposite of her sister much to Felicity's pleasure. She became a teen aware of the toll of abuse, rape, violence, self harm and drugs can have on someone because she was not dumb or blind she saw how her sister was battling her demons and how their mother was a piece of shit. That gave her compassion to fight for people like her and her sister, she channel the light inside her and by the time she reached High School she built her own school club where she helped her classmates offering advice and even food, courtesy of one her friends who almost died because she was starving due to money shortage her family was facing.

Samantha manage to get her sister and the local bakery to allow her to cook every day for those kids and she met Doctor Charles, father of one of her classmates, who helped her with advice offerings and medicine advice from Miss Goodwin.

When Felicity was a Senior in high school she had enough of the life she lived and tried to kill herself but Samantha found her before she had time to slice her wrists and forced her to go to Doctor Charles' house so she could start counseling. Later the same year, Samantha forced Felicity to help her cook everyday as a way to focus on something else but her pain.

It worked.

The Smoak sisters were strong and everyone who knew them knew not to mess with them.

Until someone tried to do just that.

Samantha was the social butterfly out of the two so it was normal for the girl to attend parties. It was one party that threatened the light inside Samantha.

She got raped. The asshole who did this to her was the father of a classmate of Samantha's. Samantha a week ago had tried to help his son get out of the abusive house with Hank Voight's help but the plan failed and her classmate was beaten to death.

https://youtu.be/UyS61HXwLbY

That drove Samantha to the breaking point as she limbed to her home only to find Felicity cleaning the dishes.

"Go to your room. Mum has a guy in her room and he has a gun, we need to be careful around him." Felicity whispered without looking to Samantha as she continued the chore.

"If he wants he can have the second round of rape." Samantha said in an emotionless voice that scared Felicity and turn to see her little sister, beaten and bruised with blood pooling under her legs.

"OH! MY GOD!"

Felicity yelled as she run to her sister and hugged her as the girls broke down.

"Why do good people always get hurt?" Samantha asked in pain as she sobbed in her sister's arms.

Felicity had no time to answer as the door of their mother's room was yanked open and man marched out of the room with an angry look on his face as behind him trailed a drunken and high off the charts woman, Felicity's and Samantha's mum.

"DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO SHUT UP?!" The man roared at the teens but his eyes stare in shock the blood.

"WHAT? DID WE DESTROY YOUR FUCKING?" Felicity hissed at the man who got over his shock once he registered what he was told, in seconds he pulled his gun out and aim it at Felicity's head who was standing protectively before Samantha.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY, BITCH?" The man roared as he took the safety off.

"GO BACK FUCKING THE GOOD FOR NOTHING WHORE!" Felicity hissed back and stood up as the gun was pointed at her forehead.

"HOW ABOUT TO FUCK YOU INSTEAD?" The man said with a sick light in his eyes as he grabbed Felicity by the throat and pinned her to the wall.

Samantha quickly pushed the pain and fear as she run to the kitchen tap and took a kitchen knife and the frying pan. She run to her sister's aid and sliced his arm causing the gun to be fired and the bullet to get to Felicity's abandoned as Felicity yelled in pain then Samantha yanked the frying pan on the man's head knocking him out.

Then Samantha quickly dialed 911.

In all of this their mother stood on the wall and continue smoking...looking completely out of it. She couldn't even register that her older daughter was almost raped and shot while her younger daughter was raped!

She didn't give a flying fuck at the moment!

That day marked something in both girls their souls were forever scarred.

But thankfully when the police showed up Samantha and Felicity justified against their mother who went to rehab and jail for child neglecting and possession of illegal drugs and many more fallownesses.

The guy that raped Samantha was caught within a day and locked behind bars for first degree murder, rape and domestic abuse.

Wallace Boden was their emergency contact so long story short the girls were adopted by Wallace and his wife Donna. Felicity felt guilty for burdening Wallace and his family so she decided to take up the firefighters test since she had graduated MIT and had no job offers yet being eighteen and all. A year later she was a trainee in House 51 under Boden while at the after she attended MIT.

Samantha at the age of 19 graduated with honors just like Felicity did at the age of fourteen but Samantha didn't go to MIT like Felicity but was accepted at Harvard to study Genetics and Psychology.

The years went on and the girls healed with time and happiness as they let the past behind and thrived.

The fourth year of Felicity being on Truck 81 she got a job offer in QC so she moved to Starling city while Samantha worked in a Lab since she had participated in an excavation in Cardiff that found remains of Neanderthals and they were studying them.

Life was okay for both girls since they found time to visit their families back in Chicago.

Until it wasn't.

Felicity for years battled depression and self harmful thoughts with the help of her family and friends in House 51, Erin and Hank with Jay and the rest of CPD and recently added some employs from Chicago Med and Peter Stone and Anna Valdez.

But having friends who don't stay in the same town as you and don't talk much because of busy schedules was challenging for Felicity, she cursed herself for needing the emotional support of others since being shot did something to her...she woke up from the surgery and she broke down crying in Samantha's arms. She could feel feelings again...like a switched was turned on after being turned off when she learnt of their dad's death.

And like that she stare at the photo on her computer desktop completely lost in her thoughts as Oliver, Sara and Diggs discussed about Slade.

In the photo she was with Samantha and their half brother Greg with whom they met when he showed up with Hank at the hospital right after they testified against their mother and he broke down crying apologizing for not being a good brother to them.

Felicity had forgiven him, something she wouldn't have done if she didn't feel anything, but they needed a family and Greg was their last resort. Besides everyone deserves a second chance.

She sighed as she turned around and saw Team Arrow looking at her expectantly.

"What?" She asked confused.

"You sighed kinda sad, are you okay?" Sara asked worried and Felicity fought back the answer that came to mind; it was something the old Felicity would say, something bitchy.

"Yes, I need some air." Felicity said as she walked out of the Foundry. Fate had it and it was raining, Felicity loves the rain.

https://youtu.be/zHa3JTEJmOU

She breathed in the fresh air as she allowed the rain to soak her to the bone.

Her mind flashed to the Undertaking when Tommy called her asking for help to evacuate CNRI and how she refused because of Arrow business and how guilty she felt when she heard from the paramedics that they had pulled a victim out of the rubbles.

She had rushed to the hospital only to find Tommy unconscious and the prognosis was that he had amnesia and that he was very lucky that the internal bleeding had stopped.

He stayed for days in ICU when he suddenly started remembering and asked the nurse to call Felicity.

She had rushed to the hospital and into the room.

"I need a favor from you, Felicity." He had said as he lied on the bed.

"So you know how my dad was neglecting me, right?" He continued to talk as Felicity held his hands as a guilty friend would.

"Well, he is not my dad. He is my step dad. My actual dad goes by the name Cornelius Rhodes and I have a sister Claire. Contact them please. I might not have the best relationship with them but I came close to death so I need to change attitude and they were the first people I thought." He said as he looked in a pleading manner at Felicity who nodded and took out the phone and dialed the number Tommy told her.

Later that day Claire rushed into the hospital with her dad and fiancé in toe as they rushed into the room with tears.

"YOU ARE OKAY!" Claire exclaimed in happiness as she hugged her older brother.

"Who are you?" Cornelius asked protectively as he watched Felicity stand awkwardly in the corner of the room.

"I'm Felicity the woman who..." Felicity started saying but Cornelius tight embrace stopped mid-sentence as he cried on her shoulder.

"Felicity thank you! So much!" Cornelius said after he composed himself.

"You're welcome, sir. Now I better go! Get well Tommy!" Felicity said awkwardly as she walked out of the room.

A few weeks later Tommy was discharged and Felicity with Claire had become good friends so they helped Tommy into the limo that will take them to Chicago.

Tommy later that night send an e-mail to Felicity telling his story how his mum and dad got divorced and his mum won his custody while Cornelius got his sister's custody, so they were separated. And how he wanted a new start so he was changing his name to Connor Rhodes and he was going to Riyadh for his residence as a med student. He was requesting to keep his survival a secret since the press hadn't got a whiff of him.

She was shocked reading this but accepted it and manage to fake the death of Tommy Merlyn with the help of Peter Stone's contacts and Cornelius' money and like that Tommy Merlyn was dead to the world.

Felicity was drawn back to reality by her phone ringing.

"Hello?" She said on the phone smiling.

"Hey, sis! It's me, Sam! Okay, so listen before you freak out! I invite you and all of our family to mine and my team's presentation where all of us will get awards for our findings! It would mean the world to me to have you all there applauding me!" Samantha said quickly and by the end of the sentence she was short of breath.

"I'm so proud of you!!! Of course we will try to be there. So where is the presentation and awards?" Felicity asked excitedly.

"It's in Cardiff!" Samantha said excitedly.

"We will try to be there. I will but I'm not sure about the others. And again I'm really proud of you!" Felicity said smiling proudly.

The sisters said goodbye because Samantha was about to get out of the Lab and she wouldn't be in Wi-Fi range so she could use Viber in order to contact her sister freely.

Felicity then stared at the sky and thanked any higher power out there for giving her a calm present and teaching her how to be strong. She was really lucky.

She smiled and walked back inside while texting Connor to see how he is doing, it's been a week since he arrived at Chicago again and he started working at Chicago Med. And as his friend she was curious to see how he is handling the brutality of Chicago.

She smiled as Connor send her a selfie of himself and Will with their tongue poking out and their eyes rolling back as they were slammed on the waiting room chairs with the caption;

"Maggie took a picture of us. I think this pic speaks for everyone in Chicago Med."

She saved the picture and closed the phone as she entered the lair.

"You're feeling better?" Sara asked her and she nodded and sat before the computers and continued trying to find dirt on Slade and Isobel Rochev.

The days went by quickly until one day her phone rang and it was Peter Stone and Anna Valdez telling her that they will be in Starling City for a week for a trial and Felicity offered her house for accommodation.

So when Peter and Anna arrived at Starling City Felicity was cheery as fuck since she had to see them since Christmas in and now it was mid May. Felicity picked them up at the airport and drove to her favorite pub, a little secret she had kept for Team Arrow was that she loved drinking beer more than wine.

Another thing she had lied about was where she came from since she wanted no one to know that she testified against her own mother who was a prostitute. So she forged everything about her life except her name. She even lied about growing up in Las Vegas, she was born and bred in Chicago and she was proud of it but wanted to keep them safe from the Arrow's enemies.

https://youtu.be/0-jNIeG2_wo

So when she walked inside the pub she waved at a few familiar faces and sat in a booth.

"Sorry, this isn't Molly's but does the magic." Felicity said laughing at Anna's approval look as she marveled the pub.

Peter laughed at Felicity's comment and then they ordered.

Unknown to them Sara and her dad were at the same pub just a booth down from them and Sara was shocked seeing her there.

"So, Sam invited us in Cardiff for her presentation, will you be there?" Peter asked as he took a sip of his beer and Felicity nodded.

"Of course!"

"Me too! I'm a sucker for History." Anna said excited as she drank from her beer.

"How are you?" Peter asked concerned at Felicity when he noticed the fresh cuts on the inside of her elbow.

"How do you think? It's hard and as time passes it gets harder since I get tired." Felicity answered sadly and Anna rubbed her back. Sara watched the scene and furrowed her eyebrows.

"Maybe you need some vitamins or anti-depressions." Peter tried yet again to convince Felicity to allow herself to use medication.

"It seems that I should contact Will then." Felicity grumble and Peter sighed.

"For the gazillion time I tell you that you need medicine in your condition! Samantha does and look at her!" Peter said slightly angry at Felicity who drank her beer and stare at him in the eyes with a cold expression that told whoever knew her that they had crossed a line.

Sara was shocked to see Felicity like that.

"Okay, Peter and Felicity we are here to have fun! So stop playing parenting and undisciplined teenager and let's get drunk!" Anna said serious and both adults shook their heads and nodded.

"Okay so...what do we do?" Anna asked Felicity with a smirk.

"You know the answer Valdez. We go dancing!" Felicity said smiling as Peter slammed his head on the table groaning.

"I'm no good when it comes to dancing, girls!" Peter whined and both women huffed and started laughing

"I beg the differ, Stone!" Anna and Felicity said laughing as he groaned with his head down.

"Felicity Smoak looks like she is having fun!" Detective Lance observed shocked.

"Yeah!" Sara said confused and curious.

"So, Kelly told me that Halestorm are performing just outside town and got four tickets for him, Dawson and Casey and his ex-girlfriend but Dawson and Casey are on a romantic getaway and he had three free tickets. So what do you say?" Felicity said smirking knowing that Peter, Anna and her were huge fans of Halestorm.

Peter then drained his beer in one sip and then clapped his hands together and said;

"Let's go then!"

Felicity and Anna laughed as they cheered and paid the bill and walked out of the pub much to Sara shock.

Later That Night In The Foundry:

https://youtu.be/kipSZRxuBfk

"I saw Felicity today at the pub me and dad met...she was with another guy and a girl. She was different...she was dressed in jeans and red cropped leather jacket with a black shirt underneath. She seemed like those three knew each other from back in the day. This guy Peter told to Felicity that she needed medication and vitamins which made Felicity glare at him in such way I have never seen her do. It was all so weird." Sara rambled deep in thoughts as Oliver was in the Salmon Ladder and Diggs was cleaning his guns.

"Medication and vitamins? Is she sick?" Oliver asked concerned as he jumped from the Ladder.

"I don't know. She and her friends went to a Halestorm concert or something that their common friend named Kelly, and it's a guy, had brought tickets for. And the weirdest part was that she drank beer...not wine!" Sara continued as she sat on Felicity's chair and opened Google search and wrote;

"Peter Stone"

Oliver by now was by her side and watched as she searched.

"This is the guy! He looked extra concerned with her health." Sara said as she pulled a photo of Peter Stone in a suit that fitted him well.

"WOW! He is hot!" Diggle commented loudly as he watched next to Oliver and Oliver growled in jealousy.

Were they dating and he cared so much?

After that night Felicity called in sick but Oliver and Diggs knew that something wasn't right but couldn't contact her since she had turned off her phone. She disappeared to Chicago and took their friends to Cardiff where they watched as Samantha Smoak and her team won her International History Award hosted by the Cardiff International University.

When she returned Oliver and Sara bombarded her with questions which she answered with this excuse;

"I went to a family wedding"

They hadn't been convinced but had no time to dwell on it since Slade was a pressing matter and they focused on it.

https://youtu.be/MLUoKOt_kOc

Then the whole Slade scum happened and Felicity had enough of it and the night after they returned from the beach she did something she had to do since she was a Senior in High School.

She walked to the bathroom and stare at herself while she called Connor.

"Connor it's me Felicity. I'm so sorry! I tried! I really did! But the Darkness is too much to bear! I don't want to remind you of your mother but...I can't suffer anymore. I'm not strong enough." She cried as she studied the kitchen knife she held.

"It's funny really...Samantha used a knife to stop a man my mum entertained from raping me and chocking me to death. She was just raped yet she saved me. Now she is not here. No one is here to save me." Felicity said sadly as she saw the knife glittering in the light of the bathroom.

Unknown to her Connor once he heard the chaos in Starling City took the first train with Will and Kelly by his side and just when Felicity called him they were under her house and once Connor heard the voicemail panicked.

"She is going to kill herself, guys!" Connor yelled as he run quickly to her apartment.

The boys find her with her wrist bleeding and on the floor of her bathroom.

"NO!" Connor chanted again and again as he held Felicity in his arms and cried.

"CALL MY DAD!" Connor yelled at Will who nodded in shock as he dialed away and put it on speaker.

"Hey! Dad, Felicity tried to kill herself...I need some way to take her out of this god forsaking town and back home! Send help! I'll try to stop the bleeding!" Connor said quickly as Will handed the phone to Kelly who held it close to Connor so he can speak. Will and Connor had gone into doctor mode and tried to stop the bleeding as Kelly cried silently.

Twenty minutes later the sound of a helicopter made them look up and a message from Claire telling them that Chicago Med sent a helicopter and to get to the roof made Kelly and Will pick up Felicity's limb body and run to the roof of the building.

Felicity came around two days later in the Psychiatric wing of Chicago Med.

"What happened?" Felicity asked Connor and Cornelius once she came around.

"You tried to kill yourself." Connor said angry.

"I know how it must look, Connor but I'm not your mum." Felicity said to Connor who looked at her crying.

"I know it's just...agh! I hate depression! I suffer from it and seeing you cave in, you THE Felicity Smoak who survived ten years raising your sister and taking care of the house. You are strong and depression broke you! What is going to happen to me then?" Connor said crying as Connor hugged her and Cornelius sighed.

"Depression is a very sneaky evil." Cornelius said sadly as he took his turn to hug Felicity.

"I'm glad you are not dead, Felicity." Cornelius said sadly and then took his queue to leave the room.

"My dad seems to like you...as a person...thank God!" Connor tried to joke but Felicity's eyes teared up.

"I'm not strong, Connor....i need people to keep me off the wagon. I feel like drowning." Felicity said as Connor hugged her and she broke down crying.

"We are going to help you!" Connor promised and for the first time in twenty years Felicity felt like she had a family that wouldn't go away with the first stupid mistake she would do.

That family was here to stay.

Her Chicago family was here to stay.

So? What do you think? Did you like it? Tell me in your comments!