Jisoo's POV:

"I just called Sorn. She is on her way." Chaeng announced, coming into the living room where me and Jennie were having a quick lunch.

The apartment had been quiet for the last couple of days since the scandal and it was like it was getting worse as time passed. Lisa didn't leave her room all days and to make her eat was a nightmare. First, we thought she was reacting well. Past the initial shock and online comments, it was like she had relaxed and calmed down.

Until they kept coming.

Lisa completely closed up. Nothing made her smile or come out of her room. She now spends hours reading articles and comments instead of listening or talking to us and the worst part is that she doesn't care for positive comments and only listens to the bad ones.

I don't know for how long this is going to last but I feel lost. Without Lisa's constant joking, Chaeng and Jennie stopped being their happy selves and I lost interest in making them laugh as well. No one is in the mood for anything and no one knows what we can do to make all of this go away. We are not the same BlackPink from before.

Jungkook has been spending the afternoons here with us, usually, until Lisa kicks him out of the room saying she wants to be alone when being alone is be the last thing she should be doing. Unfortunately, Bangtan had to leave for the AMAs yesterday so today our plan is to call one of Lisa's friends. Sorn from CLC.

So in the middle of all of this mess, I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I'm BlackPink's older sister and what they call "funny member". I'm a lot of times considered the unofficial leader of this team but as of now, I feel powerless, not to mention, Jinyoung never talked to me again ever since all of this became public. He didn't call, nor did he text and, to be honest, even if he had I don't know if I had the time to pick up.

But it still hurt me that he didn't. It's like I want his attention even though I know that at the moment I can't give mine to him. I wished we could talk at night like we used to even if it was just texting. I just want someone to talk to that is not in the middle of this scandal mess.

Something to brighten up these sad and stressful times. I got used to us talking and the lack of it makes me feel like my days aren't complete.

"Unnie, are you listening?" Jennie asked, pulling out of my thoughts.

Spacing out. It has been happening a lot around here.

"Yes, sorry. I heard you. Sorn is coming." I replied, low toned.

Rosie came closer, sitting down next to me on the couch, "Are you okay, unnie?"

Chaeng. She is the one who is taking all of this the hardest, just as I expected. Yesterday, I heard her cry in her room and I had no idea of what to say or what to do to comfort her.

She said she hated to see Lisa like this and that she didn't deserve what she is going through. That it's not fair that idols can't find love.

Chaeyoung may not look like it but she is one of the strongest people I know. Crying is just a reflex and people usually underestimate her because of being sensitive and doing it a lot. She is sensitive because she wants everyone around her happy and does the most for it. It's the pure and innocent side of Rosie and here she is, worried for Lisa but still having time to worry about me.

"I am, Chaeyoungie, don't worry about me." I lied, grabbing her hand to caress it.

Someone in this household has to stay strong. For all of us. I can't break down when the rest of them are already in bad state, as much as I would like to. What is going to be of us if we all break? Who will help Lisa? Who will help the rest of them? And most importantly, who will put us back up? If you let yourself break, standing again is 10 times more hard. I refuse to do it, this team can't just break.

The silence in this dorm lately has been consuming and uncomfortable. No one dares to keep happy conversations when our minds are all on what is going on outside our home at YG and online.

No one watches dramas, movies or series anymore. Music can no longer be heard coming from Chaeng's room. When we hang out in the living room we have short dialogues that are either about Lisa or us and spend most of the time on our phones.

It's obnoxious. I can't live like this forever. It's not in our nature, we are a loud group who is always joking.

We were under the same environment when we heard the bell ring, twice in a row. It's our managers.

We stood up and went to the door as we waiting for the two of them to come up and tell us why they are here. I can feel my heart beating faster than ever and my palms getting hotter. They probably being news from our boss. News that will make or break this team.

"Girls, YG sajangnim wants to see you three later this evening." One of them said after we all sat down around the living room.

The three of us? Does that mean he is kicking Lisa out? He can't do that, we will never make it without her. It's not fair she did nothing wrong.

"The three of us?" Jennie asked, anticipating me, she probably is thinking the same as me.

"Yes, we know Lisa is way too down to do anything besides being in her room and we don't want to force her to. So no, YG is not kicking her out of the group, don't worry. He is just letting her deal with this on her own. You can pass on what he decided later to her. You guys were lucky, has this been years ago you would have all been fired on the spot. He is much lighter now." The other manager explained, calming our nerves.

Does this mean nothing is going to happen to us? We survived the scandal? We are going to stay together as 4? I thought we could even get disbanded due to how serious all of this seems to be, not even just Lisa leaving.

Everyone in the country knows what's going on. They may not be mad about the dating part but they know and those people are also following the story. The public wants to know what is going to happen next. I can see it through the online comments, this just became Korea's new favorite reality show and I don't know how I feel about it.

But nonetheless, for the first time since this relationship became public, I felt some relief. We weren't getting disbanded or changing to a group of 3. Our careers, as far as our boss was concerned, were safe. All those years of training weren't for nothing.

But at the end of the day, after Sorn left, there were we, being escorted to our Boss's office. The office all of the artists in YG fear. Even BigBang, and they are big names already.

Even though we knew we weren't getting fired, the nervousness in the air was clear and during the silent car journey a thought came to mind. Something I hadn't crossed my mind up until that moment.

What if I'm made to drop off Inkigayo, as part of the hiatus we will be put on to let all of this calm down?

I felt my heart sink once again. That meant I would never see Jinyoung regularly again. We would most probably have a fall out, without me even realizing what my feelings are.

But one thing changed the moment I realized that. He means more to me than I thought.
I want to see him all the time, I get nervous when alone in the same room, I get hurt if he doesn't text or call. Losing this would break me in a way I had never considered before, and what we have isn't even that deep, but I was used to whatever we had and only now that it has been compromised is that I realize how much.

I like him and admitting that is harder than I thought. I never truly liked anyone. Sure I had crushes but like? Never. It's a scary feeling.

What if he doesn't like me back and I'm just seeing things? Worst, what if I have to leave the show? I don't want to.

Because I do, I like him. I like everything about him. He is caring, intelligent and funny, not to mention, handsome. We have a lot of stuff in common. Our conversations are interesting. I like him and I wish I had realized it sooner.

This doesn't mean I won't run to tell him because I won't, but I wish for this not to be broken while it's still blooming.