A/N: Warning. Depictions of violence involving a child.

::

Six month old Sakura sat on a plush polka dot blanket on the floor as she clacked her building blocks together and nibbled on her teething ring. Kisame lay on his side next to her with his head propped up in his palm and his eyes fading in and out from being open and closing for minutes at a time.

"Buh, buh, buh, buh, gah!" Sakura exclaimed. He nodded and patted her stomach in encouragement.

"You're doing just fine," he mumbled. "Anything else you want to tell me?"

A clatter of wooden blocks.

"Bug-guh."

"Mhm. And?"

"Bah-wah..."

Konan took care of Sakura well enough when he wasn't around. Granted, she was rather... dispassionate about it and didn't coo or praise or cuddle, but she had enough kindness deep in her heart to understand that children needed warmth, constant contact, and tenderness. She wasn't the ideal mother figure he wanted for his daughter, but it was enough. And he was grateful.

Kisame sat up as he felt a presence enter his apartment, frowning at his unusual guest. Kakuzu stood at the edge of the living room free of his mask and cloak. He never came to visit unless on orders and honestly couldn't care less about the other members of the organization, but here he was. Stone-faced and off-set eyes boring holes into Sakura's skull.

She stared back at him and gnawed her ring.

"What is that?"

"Nothing you'll care enough about," Kisame grunted. He picked up his daughter and placed her in his lap as she babbled nonsensical words. He then reached into a tupperware and pulled out a smooshy peach to hand over to her before looking up at Kakuzu again. "What do you want?"

"You're needed on another mission," Kakuzu said. He looked at the baby a little longer, perplexed. "Leader wanted me to tell you that Konan won't be available for the allotment you'll be gone."

Kisame cursed. How was he going to find a babysitter for Sakura this time? Orochimaru and Sasori were still out of the equation and the only person he could even think of asking was... He grimaced at the thought of his only option and looked up.

"I need to—"

"Why is there—"

"—ask you—"

"—a child—"

"—a—"

"—in—"

"—favor!"

"—your care?"

Their words jumbled together in succession of their statements, but Kisame took it upon himself to sigh and stand as he hefted Sakura up in one of his arms.

"This is Sakura, my daughter," he said. Kakuzu raised a brow and stared at the baby again. "She's six months old and she needs someone to take care of—"

"No."

"I wouldn't be asking you if I didn't have any other choice, would I?" Kisame tried. He was starting to sound desperate, but there was no one else he could turn to. "Please, Kakuzu-san. I just need someone to watch over her until I get back."

The older of the two raised his unsettling eyes to gaze blankly at his colleague. 

"Two weeks ago, you were laughing about a set of kills you had and how they weren't much of a show. You're a murderer. What are you doing playing 'dad' like you have the time?"

Kisame frowned. "Just because I kill for a living doesn't mean I can't have important people. Yeah, I'm a missing-nin and yeah, I committed treason. Who makes the rules about what I do with my life?"

Laughing about a death was different than regarding death itself, but Kakuzu dropped the subject without further question. It wasn't a necessary conversation they needed to have—he didn't care about the other's personal choices as long as it didn't interrupt the money flow that contributed to the Akatsuki's income. 

He watched as the baby made grabs at her father's gills and nose.

"Look, the hit I have on this mission is worth eleven million with a 42% bonus if I finish before the deadline," Kisame said, unbothered by the tiny hands lightly smacking his face. Kakuzu's lips pressed into a grim line. "You can take my pay for this mission. Akatsuki grants us liberal wage for us anyways, so I won't need it. Just... please. You're the next best thing."

And that was how Kakuzu was left with a baby, a bag of things he'd never seen in his life, a set of written instructions on child care, and a plea to not kill Sakura when she cried. The little girl resigned to her spot on her polka dot blanket, her teething rin in her hands and some drool trickling down the corner of her mouth.

"Children are creatures I've never been fond of," he scowled. "You cause too much trouble and you cost more than you're worth. I don't know why Kisame decided to have you or why his compassion is saved solely for you, but don't expect it from me. I am not a friend. I am not an ally. If I hadn't been offered payment prior to this, you'd already be dead."

Sakura just gave him a bubbly smile and munched on her teething ring.

::

Three days later, Kakuzu learned to live with the baby with as minimal physical contact as possible. Kisame told him that babies needed constant contact to let them know they were safe and secure, but what security was there in a world like this? It was either keep your guard up or die. Besides, the girl was more well mannered than his previous partners and she didn't bother him when he counted money.

The babysitting job was fine. When Kisame came back, he didn't have to see her any longer, then everything would be left at that.

But then one of the bounty exchange masters—Zangei—alerted him that a group of enemy chuunin worth some pocket change were in the area.

After reading the short message delivered to him via one of his numerous networks, Kakuzu crumpled the paper in his fist and turned to scoop up Sakura who was already dressed in her footie pajamas. The moon shone through the specks of rain that fell from the sky as he opened the door out of the apartment, the backdrop of night welcoming nothing but heavy clouds.

Kisame said Sakura understood many words despite not yet knowing how to speak up.

Tonight, she would learn a set of new words forged from the world of death and disgrace she was born into.

Blood money.

::

The country Amegakure resided in had more abandoned settlements than it did people, so he wasn't surprised when he was ambushed in the middle of one of them. Kakuzu eyed the four chuunin that he came into contact with and let out a guttural growl as he spied the glinting headbands they wore with such undeserving pride. 

Takigakure.

There was nothing he hated more than Takigakure.

"Akatsuki," one of them spat. "Kidnapping a child. A baby! Where's your shame?!"

Sakura whimpered at the strange woman and clung harder onto Kakuzu's cloak. He offered her no comfort.

Without warning, a tendril shot out and slashed the speaker across her neck, sending her gurgling on her own blood as she collapsed on the ground, gasping. The other three jumped away to create distance and planned their next move, but Kakuzu knew it was limited as they more than likely wanted to harm Sakura as little as possible.

More leverage. Maybe children had their uses.

A second chuunin took their chance and swiped downwards with a katana—maybe Kakuzu wouldn't think to make sudden movements. Or perhaps he had enough heart to realize that one could shake a child that young and risk brain damage or death, so he wouldn't move and block out his tendrils to try and outmaneuver the blow and protect the baby that would probably be sold to whatever sick bastard would pay for her.

But the chuunin miscalculated. 

Kakuzu shifted so the baby was more to his front.

The katana made a precise slice from top to bottom, missing Kakuzu, but nicking the baby on the top left ear and leaving a cut that was too deep to mend.

Sakura screamed and wailed as waterfalls of tears spewed from her eyes. The chuunin froze, horror dawning on his face after realizing what he'd done, and signing his fate by allowing Kakuzu the opportunity to rip out his guts in his distraction.

Upon brief inspection at the baby's torn, bloodied ear, he figured she'd be fine for another hour or so and could sustain a couple more surface injuries before anything too serious could happen.

The third chuunin could have been the least wise of the four that made a mistake of converging on him—honestly, who were they kidding, they were far out of their league the moment an S-class criminal decided to cash them in—and armed himself with weapons and diligence like he should, but mustered imploring eyes.

What an idiot.

"That baby is hurt," he grit out. "You can stop this now and get her some help. She's barely a child and the least you could do is get her healed!"

Kakuzu would've scoffed at the notion if he wasn't so uncaring of the topic at hand, but he'd have to admonish the effort put forth. Reasoning through morality with a man who'd been a criminal for longer than the chuunin had been alive was stupid. More than stupid, actually. 

Pathetic.

He raised his free arm and shot it at his enemy, his thick gray fingers clamping around his neck and the force of the attack sending him sprawling into the bark of a tree. More tendrils came out of the extension as he approached the fourth and final member of the Takigakure platoon.

"Why?" the chuunin hissed. "Why not give the baby up? Is putting her in danger really worth selling her to the highest bidder?"

Kakuzu knocked him to the side with the single swing of his fist, surely crushing skull and damaging the brain. Then, he crouched in front of the body as Sakura's wails filled the otherwise silent setting. The hand still attached to the third chuunin suddenly constricted full force, the wet slick of viscous liquid and veins dripping from his skin as he retracted it and held it in front of his last victim's chest.

"I'm not selling her," he said. He plunged his hand through skin and lungs and took out a still beating heart. "I'm babysitting."

He tossed the heart aside, worthless and weak, and began to make his way back to the village. Sakura wasn't as loud this time, but still cried and whined until her small voice grew hoarse.

"Remember what you witnessed here," Kakuzu told her. She sniffled and sobbed and hiccuped tiredly. "This is what happens to fools who think they can change the world."

He carried her back to the apartment in the dead of night with both of them covered in blood; Kakuzu in his victims' in Sakura's in her own.

::

Kisame returned home a week later and he was inwardly giddy with excitement at seeing his baby again after so long. On his way home he'd passed a store and bought a shark plushie he thought his daughter would adore.

As he stepped through the threshold, he felt a cold winding in his stomach and new immediately that something was wrong. Kakuzu was at the dining table with a book and pen, and Sakura was on her blanket in the living room sucking on her purple pacifier and acting the most quiet darling in the world.

But Sakura always made little noises when she had her pacifier or waved her arms wildly as she flopped her toys around or observed them with a childish rigor. 

He ran over and held her close. It took her a few moments to realize that 'papa' was home, and once she knew, she echoed tiny whimpers and buried her face in his neck. Kisame, bothered by the unusual level of clinginess, scanned her body of injuries until he spotted her left ear.

The whole outer ear was mangled to hell, stitched with black thread he knew all too well and in the process of healing.

His heart dropped into his stomach.

"What did you do to her?" he whispered. 

"Nothing," Kakuzu replied, unconcerned as he continued with whatever task he was on. "I only showed her the types of things her father does when he's not home."

"She's a baby," he hissed. "What did she see? What did you make her see?"

There was the sound of a book shutting and the light clatter of a pen meeting wood.

"There were four opportunities to change my hearts last week. Unfortunately, this harvest was unfruitful," Kakuzu replied. His tone was blasé and unsympathetic even as he noticed the growing rage that surrounded his fellow Akatsuki member.

"Get out."

Kakuzu didn't need to be told twice. Kisame waited for the telltale click of the front door before he pressed a kiss to the top of her head and held her closer, murmuring his apologies through long minutes as she snuggled up to him and drifted off to sleep in her father's arms.

"You'll be okay now," he promised. But he found that promise lacking sincerity because he didn't know if she'd be okay. Not with the life he had or the one he provided her. "You'll... You'll be safe. You'll grow up to be better than I'll ever be."

But that was the one promise he could gift her because it was the very least he could ever do.

Criminals like him were not kind people.

Criminals like him were never supposed to raise a child.