"Nobody is ever really dead until they are forgotten."

Anne reached the farm late on Sunday afternoon as the moon dragged the sun down in favour of nightfall.

Rosalie's farm was secluded, concealed by a cluster of pine trees that scented the area. A strong fence had been place around the farm, staking out the fields. The house itself was modest, but Anne thought it was lovely. She thought of Peggy and January and everything they'd endured... they deserved to live somewhere so safe and pretty. Anne's thoughts turned to Kes. He had deserved it too. Anne's heart hung heavy like the chime in a bell, ticking away the seconds until she had to say goodbye.

"Are you alright?" Jerry asked quietly, looking at Anne sideways as he steered the cart up the track.

Anne didn't answer, her eyes drinking in the evening. The flowers by the side of the road, the crops in the distance, the swallows chasing each other in synchronisation across the peachy sunset and scattered black clouds. It was a wonderful evening. Anne had tears in her eyes at the thought that Kes never got to see any of it.

As soon as they pulled the buggy up in the yard, the door swung open and a tall, dark-haired girl ran out. Jerry dismounted and held the horses bridle still, patting it calm after the long journey. January sprinted out into the rain and down to the cart. She climbed up, and hugged Anne tightly. The girls cried together, their tears washed away by the heavy rain.

"I'm sorry for everything." Anne sobbed into January's shoulder.

"I'm sorry too." January whispered.

...

The grave was dug on top of the hill surrounded by a jaw-dropping view of the midsummer countryside.

Jerry had helped Anne make it to the top of the hill and Anne stood leaning against him, gripping his arms for support. Peggy stood holding a small sapling tree in her dirty hands, her tear-streaked face awash with deep sadness. She looked so young, her mousy hair hanging around her face which seemed pointed and pale from the stress of the past few weeks. January was stubborn-faced, stoic after breaking down upon Anne's arrival. Rosalie, Peggy's older sister had sent word to the mortuary and Kes' body had been prepared for burial and delivered. After burying him they helped Peggy plant the sapling, not caring about the earth dirtying their clothes as the rain churned it to mud.

"It's an apple tree - they'll be as red as his hair." Peggy murmured.

The grave was like a stamp in the sun-bleached green grass of the hill, a dark rectangle of flattened earth, the small tree sprouting out of the ground.

"Goodbye Kes. I hope you get to be happy wherever you are now, I hope you get to be a child, I hope you are happy." January said, her voice hoarse from holding back the tears.

"I will miss you every day, brother." Peggy whispered, tears silently streaming down her face and rolling off to the wet ground. "All my life I've suffered with fear, but for you I will be brave... I will live for you, live the life you deserved. Goodbye."

Last of all Anne spoke, her emotions thick in every word. After the doped week on Laudanum, her emotions were back in full force. She felt the grief in every bone, every vein, every nerve.

"Dear Kes... of all the terrible and sad things that I've endured, your loss will forever stay in my broken heart. I pride myself in being able to vocalise my thoughts well yet for once there are no words. I'm sorry, so completely, dreadfully sorry. You deserved so much better." Anne began to cry again. "Nobody is ever dead until they are forgotten, and I will never forget you." Anne's hair blazed in the wind, red as Kes's.

Anne trembled and Jerry hugged her tightly.

Their goodbyes hung in the air heavy and dense like evening mist. Their tears and sobs echoed down the hill and through the trees, mixing with the howl of the wind which had begun to gather and the thundering of rain that stampeded the ground like a hundred drums. Somewhere birds called out too, a final farewell to the brave, willful, loyal boy that had been lost.

Looking up at the sunset, Anne saw parting birds. Geese. Anne gazed up in wonderment at the beauty of nature. Anne felt relieved, at that sight. It uplifted her. After all the trouble she'd been through it was the small things which made her broken heart swell again, ache with something other than sadness. There was still beauty in the world, still love, happiness...

...

James Riley had been in one place since the woods. He'd made his way there that night, desperate to hide from it all and forget his problems but the events had not left his mind like he planned. Alcohol had been his only friend, as he sat in a shadowed corner of the dock inn and wallowed.

The door to the inn swung open and shed blinding light into the dark, lamp-lit interior. The newcomer was merely a figure against the golden beams leaking in from the evening glow outside. James covered his eyes and groaned, leaning over the table and trying to block it out. His head ached from days of drinking and he felt desperately tired but he had been unable to get a good night's sleep ever since the woods.

Suddenly, James felt a hand on his shoulder. Looking up, he saw Gilbert Blythe.

"You look terrible." Gilbert said, his tone a mixture of humour and fondness. It was only truth, James looked rough and he had traces of blood still on his face. His hair was a tangled mess, it was clear he hadn't slept or washed in a long time.

James exhaled before leaning back and fixing Gilbert with a hazy gaze. "I can't tell what you look like, I'm drunk out of my mind..." James smirked.

"I can tell." Gilbert sighed and sat down beside his old friend, surveying the empty glasses on the table. "If only these bartenders could see the state of your mind they wouldn't feed it with such poison."

"Oh, but I pay them so they have to," James chuckled. "Drowning myself is cheaper than buying a gun."

It suddenly hit Gilbert the depth of James's sadness. James didn't want to be here anymore.

"Spending your last buck on this stuff? Come home, James." Gilbert sighed.

"I don't have a home." James said, his face falling. "Not Canada, not Ireland, not half way across the sea on that godforsaken steamer."

"You have a home where people care about you. I care about you, you can live with me." Gilbert said firmly.

"It's easy for you, Gilbert. You have your Anne, no matter what happens to you, you'll always have your piece of happiness. My happiness died a long time ago. I can't live without happiness anymore, I've tried. It hurts too much. I can't sleep, I can't work, I can't even protect good people when I see something terrible happening."

James had tears in his eyes.

"You mean Kes? You couldn't have stopped it." Gilbert insisted.

"I can't do anything." James said, his voice shaking.

"Listen -- I know what it's like in that well of darkness that you're in right now." Gilbert spoke slowly, gripping James's arm tightly. "I was there, I wanted to run away and forget it all. But it didn't work, eventually I had to come back and face it all. There's always gonna be terrible things happening in the world and you can't stop all of them. It feels like you'll never be happy again, I know. But you will. There is so much happiness in the world and there's another piece of it for you out there somewhere. I promise you."

James contemplated this for a while, looking down into his glass before speaking.

"Why do you even want me to come back?"

"Because you're my friend." Gilbert said simply.

"Then why do I feel so alone?"

"James - you ran away from Avonlea and shut yourself off from everybody. We were all worried about you and I came all this way to find you and tell you. You're not alone, you never have been."

James was silent, the tears falling down his face now.

"Come home." Gilbert said. "Just try it for a while, see how you feel in a few months. We can find you work on the farm, you'll feel better doing something everyday, keeping your mind off it all."

James had his head in his hands, breathing deeply. Finally he nodded.

"Alright. Just to see. I'd hate to be a burden."

"Don't be stupid -- friends don't owe." Gilbert said. 'Remember?"

...

When Josie Pye recovered she returned to school and saw the confession board. Knowing instantly who'd done it, she cornered Gilbert in the cloakroom with a deep flush in her cheeks.

"How could you?" Josie hissed. They were alone yet the fear of anyone overhearing was high.

Gilbert turned to her expressionless, taking the higher ground. "You publicly shamed me and Anne, with lies. I publicly outed your lies. Call me crazy but that seems fair and square."

"You're crazy! Nobody will ever forget this." Josie said, panicking.

"Good. Neither will I." Gilbert shrugged. "If you don't want people to know you made up hurtful lies about people out of jealousy and resentment then don't make up these things in the first place!"

"You don't understand. You don't understand anything." Josie felt like crying.

"Then tell me!" Gilbert said.

"I probably would have died from the fever if you hadn't--" Josie's words erupted from her with no warning. "Nobody came, nobody did anything -- nobody cared if I was alright. I'd have died and nobody even noticed I was gone."

Gilbert was silent, shocked by her honest words. He'd never had a conversation with her so open and honest.

"Don't you see? Everybody cares about Anne. Everyone loves her." Josie bit her lip, taking deep, shaky breaths. "I used to be the most popular and now I have to fight to get noticed. After everything I do -- I should be loved too!"

"She doesn't have it that easy, you know better than most that not everybody loves her! Besides... you can't just demand love. It is earned, through kindness and empathy." Gilbert said quietly.

"But I'm -- I'm beautiful. That's all that ever mattered."

"Josie, that's not all that matters."

"My Mother told me -- she said I had to be beautiful and then I'd be loved." Josie's voice was trembling.

"That's not -- that's not true at all. What matters is your actions. How you treat people, how you talk to them and what you do with your life. That's what makes people love you."

"Why do you love Anne?" Josie asked.

"I love her because she is the kindest person I've ever known. She has such empathy, such an open mind that's eager to learn and help others and --" Gilbert stopped suddenly, a flush rising to his cheeks.

He'd just admitted to Josie that he loved Anne. Once he'd have been embarrassed to admit his feelings to anyone for fear of Anne rejecting him. Now he was proud of it. 'And she makes me happy when nobody else can.' That's how he would have finished his sentence.

...

Three weeks after the incident.

James had moved back in with Gilbert and Bash and thrown himself into work. Bash enjoyed the company while Gilbert was travelling helping the Doctors. They shared the sarcastic sense of humour drawn from past struggle, as well as memories of working on the steamer. They bonded quickly and James even began enjoying the work, especially the physical exhaustion that allowed him to sleep each night. The fresh air and contact with nature revived him too. He found it harder to dwell on the darkness of his past experiences when he was out in the fields and garden with the plants, animals and flowers.

Anne had almost recovered, she was able to stand and walk with help and the pain had faded too. She'd barely seen Gilbert except for when he'd been dropping off her lessons when it was a simple 'hello'. Anne had been studying nonstop for the upcoming exams, holed away inside her room. She'd tried not to think about how her use of Laudanum had seemed to affect her relationship with Gilbert and distanced him. Perhaps he was simply too busy? That was likely, he had been working with Doctor Grayson and Doctor Rooke every day the past few weeks, only going to school a few days and studying at home on the weekends... He too seemed to feel the pressure set in too as exams came ever nearer.

Change was coming, blowing in on the Autumn winds that graced the hazy heat of late Summer.

...

The Summer was fading in a blaze of heat, the leaves and grass turning golden in the sun. The shadows dragged out longer and darker as the days lengthened. It was upon one of those afternoons when Gilbert had a free evening and finally called upon Anne. He'd had a very long day at school and watched the clock, watched the sun falling through the sky until the last chime and he was the first out of the door. The journey to Green Gables had never felt longer as he imagined seeing her. He felt bad, he hadn't seen her properly in a while. He hadn't been there for her... Life had gotten in the way.

Jerry greeted him as he came into the yard.

"Good afternoon. If you're here to see Anne be careful. She's in a bad mood." Jerry joked.

"If you don't see me again, you know who's to blame." Gilbert laughed, shaking his head.

"Perhaps you can make her happy again. You always seem to." Jerry said.

Gilbert smiled to himself as he tied up his horse and went to the front door. As he got closer the guilt snuck up again... What if she was mad at him for being so busy? For some reason he felt a stir in his stomach. Nerves. Excitement. He still had this sensation every time he saw Anne, especially if it had been a while since the last meeting but this time it was different. What if she wasn't pleased to see him?

Marilla greeted him at the door.

"Gilbert! Good to see you. I presume you're here to see Anne -- she's in the meadow. Across the fields, through the pass. Jerry dropped her there in the cart after lunch." Marilla rolled her eyes fondly. "She said she wanted to 'soak up the turning of autumn'."

"Of course she did." Gilbert grinned and set off across the fields.

Anne was visible as soon as he crossed into the pass. Trees rose up either side of the meadow, the sun dawdling through the sky, gracing the sea of wildflowers in a hazy golden light. The green-leafed woods were peppered with bright yellow and orange, the tinge of autumn setting in. The swallows were darting across the sky, dropping low before diving and careering up into the clouds again. Anne sat in the flowers on a carpet with a basket of necessities including pen and paper, apples and a bottle of water.

Walking up quietly, Gilbert noticed that she was singing to herself. A wordless song, no recognisable tune yet sweet and with an optimistic undercurrent. Her fiery hair hung down her back loose in messy curls, contrasting against her light-brown dress. One hand was writing on some paper and the other had its fingers dug into the long grasses absently, tugging and twisting the stems. Gilbert smiled to himself. He liked her best like this... free and at one with nature.

"Marilla told me Anne was down here but all I see is Princess Cordelia." Gilbert joked, alerting Anne to his presence.

Startled, she turned and looked up at him. Tall, handsome, with tired hazel eyes and the sun haloeing behind his familiar figure. Hands in his pockets and the top button of his shirt open, his braces visible as he bore no jacket. Anne covered her brow against the sunlight and a smile tugged up her blushing cheeks.

"Don't pray on my weakened state and torment my fragile ego, Blythe." Anne scoffed. "It isn't kind."

"Torment? I never would." Gilbert's face tweaked up in a boyish smile.

"You can't resist, no matter how gentlemanly and chiveralous -- there's always going to be that part of you -- the schoolboy with the apple who delights in teasing strange girls to get attention." Anne said mercilessly.

Gilbert chuckled. "Thank God I did or I never would have met you! I'm sure it wasn't the best way to get your notice, nor your affection but -- it worked didn't it?"

"Eventually." Anne smirked.

"You're right -- I had to fight against your stubbornness for a long time. As well as my own."

"We were foolish." Anne sighed.

"I was. To deny that feeling -- by choice. I don't know what I was thinking." Gilbert's brow furrowed and he swallowed hard, thinking of Scarlett's blackmail.

Anne said nothing, merely gazed at him. Gilbert met her gaze again and they stared at each other, many thoughts passing between them... unspoken feelings shared as only two linked inexplicably by love could.

Gilbert sat down on the grass beside her and Anne put her paper down. Gilbert reached out his hand, offering it. Anne took it hesitantly. Their fingers linked together instinctively. It felt so right, so comfortable. This is where my hand is meant to be, thought Anne. They looked down at their entwined hands and exhaled a breath of relief which neither knew they were holding.

Gilbert's eyes flickered up to Anne's dear, freckled face and he searched for the words he felt he needed to say.

"I owe you an apology," He said slowly, biting his lip. "I wasn't there for you as you suffered -- not every day, not every evening. I didn't support you as I should have--"

"Gilbert - no, I owe you an apology!" Anne insisted. "I don't blame you for not coming - I was intolerable in my state..."

"Nonsense. It couldn't be helped. Laudanum has that affect on people, it wasn't you, it was the drug--"

"Oh, Gil -- it took me over. It made everything seem like a dream. But I was awful when I was coming down. I felt so unbearably angry and I hurt everywhere. Oh the pain -- I snapped at everyone and then I felt even more dreadful but the worst thing was that I knew people didn't enjoy being around me in that mood and --" Anne hesitated, her eyes darting to his self-consciously. "Well, you didn't come as often and I kept thinking about that which made me crave that dream state even more. To think I'd-- I just--"

"It wasn't you -- Anne don't think that. I had to work, I wanted to see you." Gilbert urgently assured her.

Anne was relieved.

"It was awful, the craving... " Anne said. "Marilla and Matthew gave me an ultimatum to stop taking it or I couldn't attend Kes's funeral. I had to. I thank them for their strict demands now, although I didn't at the time. I needed it."

"How were they? January and Peggy, Rosalie..."

"They were wrecked by it. I know how they feel." Anne bit her lip, looking up into the sky to avoid confronting the grief that shrouded her heart at the thought of Kes.

Gilbert squeezed her hand. "I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you."

Anne shook her head and wiped the tears from her eyes. "It's fine. I'm fine now."

"Well even if that were true, I'd still be here for you now." Gilbert said softly.

Anne's big grey eyes had that starry look in them that she so often did when focused upon Gil. Full of feelings and unsaid thoughts... The thought of how did I get so lucky?

"Gilbert I know I'm not always open enough with my feelings with you -- I just need you to know that I'm so grateful for you. All of the precious things in my life, I treasure you with them." She whispered. "I was worried for a while that I'd scared you off with my behaviour --"

"It's placid, quiet Anne that frightened me. I'd take indignant, violent Anne who hits me with a slate any day of the week." Gilbert said, his thumb stroking along the palm of her hand. "At least I knew that Anne. I hated it, truthfully... the Laudanum drained the pain from you, sure but it also drained all the Anne out of you."

Anne watched the flicker in Gil's soft brown eyes and smiled slightly.

"I just missed you." Gilbert admitted quietly.

Anne's heart fluttered. She still got that sensation, like a cage of butterflies in her chest, desperately trying to escape. She hadn't expected to see him and had entered into a musing of her imagination, as she wrote there in the peaceful meadow. But she was tired of being alone, left with only her thoughts. She was relieved for Gil.

"I missed you too." Anne said.

She kissed him very softly then, leaning in slowly and savouring the tingle as their lips brushed. The taste of him, the smell of him so close, the feel of his shoulder beneath her hand... she soaked it all in. Gilbert cupped her face gently and kissed her again, long and slow. Anne exhaled a short and shaky breath after, leaning her forehead against his. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and they stayed that way for a while, comfortable and happy together. Thoughts for the future seemed exciting and hopeful, as the turning of Autumn unfolded before them. An ending brings a whole new chapter. The sun set and filled the sky with a kaleidoscope of pinks and oranges that fell behind the pointed treeline. The meadow was bathed in the golden light of late Summer. Parting birds trailed across the sky and Gil and Anne smiled in recognition. Geese.

"Oh dear old world, how glad I am to be alive in you." Anne murmured.