This is the Wakas of Hope Ur Ok (Sour Hour #4). Thank you for giving time to read this story and the whole Sour Hour Series!

I'm always thankful to Ate Jel because of this opportunity. I wouldn't be able to join this collaboration if she didn't invite me. To the authors of Sour Hour Series, thank you for supporting me and for being a part of this.

__________

Being alive is a luck. You're alive, you are lucky, indeed. Reason why no matter hard life is, you should choose to live.

"Hindi ko po sinasadya—" naputol ang aking mga salita nang lumipad ang kamao ni Papa sa gilid ng aking labi.

Bumagsak ako sa sahig dahil sa pwersang dala ng kanyang kamao. Ngunit agad niyang hinila ang aking braso upang pwersahang itayo.

My eyes darted at my mother who's looking at me without any glint of remorse in her face. "M–Mommy," I called but instead of helping me, she instantly turned her back on us.

Si Papa rin ay tinalikuran ako at sumunod kay Mommy patungo sa kanilang silid.

I received a punch from my mother's husband just because I broke a plate. That's not new anyway. A punch from him and a slap from my mother is not that new. Every single thing I'll do is always wrong for them.

My hands balled into a fist as anger started forming in me. But I immediately let out a deep breath and tried to calm myself.

I can't be mad at my mother. You should understand her, Maverick! She let you live even though she doesn't want you!

I should understand.

At the age of ten, I'm already aware of the truth. I knew why my mother is like that. She's is a former nun and his husband is a priest who happens to be her friend. Walang planong magkaroon ng pamilya ang dalawa at magkaibigan lamang.

But all of their plans crumbled when my biological father sexually harassed my mother. And I am the fruit of it. Dahilan kung bakit napilitang umalis ang aking ina sa kumbento. At dahil kaibigan niya si Papa, na katatapos lang maging ganap na pari ay napilitan din itong akuin ang dinadala ng aking ina.

And I can't help but feel enraged at my biological father. I wish I won't see him whatever circumstances may be.

I was walking towards the living room when I heard a faint knock from our closed door.

I almost ignored it, thinking I'm just hearing things. Ngunit ilang ulit pang may kumatok at noon ko natanto kung sino ang posibleng nasa likod ng aming pinto.

My eyes widened a fraction as I gave the stairs a quick glance. Nang nasigurong nasa loob ng silid ang aking mga magulang ay agad kong tinawid ang distansya ng aming pintuan.

Pinihit ko ang seradura at dali-daling binuksan ang pinto. Agad na bumaba ang aking tingin at napabuntong hininga nang matantong tama ang aking hinala.

Amaryllis' eyes instantly lit as the corner of her lips rose for a wide smile. This kid is the daughter of our neighbor and by the looks of her smile, I already know what brought her here.

"Maverick!" An excited voice came out of her mouth. Napalakas iyon kaya naman bahagyang namilog ang aking mga mata. Nilingon ko ang loob ng mansyon at laking pasalamat nang makitang wala pa roon ang aking mga magulang.

I placed my forefinger in my lips "Shh, pagagalitan ka ni Dad."

Mariin nitong naitikom ang bibig at namimilog ang mga matang itinakip ang kamay sa mga labi.

"Why are you here?" I asked as I carefully closed the door behind me, not wanting to make anything that can disturb my parents.

Though, I already know why she's here.

Bumaba ang aking mga mata sa kanyang kamay nang inilahad niya sa akin ang dalang laruan. "Sa'yo na lang."

My eyes narrowed at her while eyeing the toy with an indifferent stare.

Oh, look at this kid.

Susuhulan pa 'ko ng laruan?

She tilted her head while still smiling. "Let's play! Then this is yours!" Iwinawagayway pa ang laruang hawak.

"I'm five years older than you, kid. I don't play."

She stopped and pouted her lips. Bagsak ang mga balikat na tinitigan niya ako, tila nanlulumo.

Mataman akong nakipagtitigan sa kanya. And the moment I sighed, the smile in her face returned like she knew what my decision is.

"I know what you want, let's go," I muttered.

Alam na alam ng batang ito na laging gumagana sa akin ang ginagawa niya.

My parents forbids me from going out of the mansion. It would cost another punch from my mother's husband but this stubborn kid won't stop.

Kapag nahuli pa 'to ng mga magulang ko na nangungulit ay baka isumbong pa nila ang batang 'to sa kapitbahay namin. I heard Mr. and Mrs. Lofanco were both strict. Pagagalitan 'tong batang 'to kapag nagkataon.

That was our routine, going at the playground every time Amaryllis' parents aren't in their mansion. Basta may kumatok sa aming mansyon na may mumunting tunog, alam ko ng wala sa mansyon ang mag-asawang Lofranco.

That lasts until the day that a man who introduced hisself as my biological father came.

"Just go with your father! We don't need you here!" Mom pushed my shoulder that made me took a step back.

Ipinaramdam niya na wala siyang pakialam sa akin. But I don't believe that. She won't let me live if she doesn't care.

In the end, I went to Russia with my father. Maybe it has been too much for my mother. Maybe seeing me makes her remember everything my father did. Reason why she can't forget about it. May be that's her reason.

I live with my father while he's training me to lead his company as his health is slowly declining. Ayaw ko man, wala na akong nagawa. I have no choice as my mother wants me to go with my biological father.

But in those years, I never forgot the kid, Amaryllis. I even imagine someone would knock on the door and it would be Amaryllis.

Lalo na nang ipakilala sa akin ang anak ng kaibigan ni Dad. Katrice is just a few years older than Amaryllis but Kat seems matured. We got along but a part of me is still looking for Amaryllis' round eyes, her pouted lips every time she feels like I'll decline whatever she wants. I miss her childish acts, though she's really a kid that time. And her being a stubborn kid, I'm longing for it.

But well, years had passed already. Who knows, Amaryllis turned seventeen already. She probably grown like a fine lady.

That's when I admitted to myself that I like her. Fuck.

I went back to the Philippines and luckily saw her in our subdivision. Agad ko siyang nakilala. She grew so much. But she never lose that bright smile. Those smile that obliviously made me smile too.

I wasn't planning to go to her. It supposed to be a quick visit, a week and I'll go back to Russia but she accidentally saw me. At agad niya akong nakilala dahilan kung bakit hindi ko na maitanggi iyon.

The week I'm saying turned to a month until it turned to a year. I courted Amaryllis and she became my girlfriend.

I feel contented in those months that I'm with her. Though, I learned that her parents are still tight with her. They're pushing Amaryllis to marry the son of their friend. And I don't know where she got the idea of us eloping.

I'm honestly against it. I don't want her to go against her parents to the point that we'll elope. There were other choices for that. But her parents are leaving her with no choice.

I agreed on Amaryllis a week after. Ngayon, siya naman ang tila nag-aalinlangan. Reason why I'm afraid I'll never see her again if we failed to elope. O kung magkita man, baka kasal na siya sa lalaking ipinapares sa kanya ng kanyang mga magulang.

And just like what I've thought, she didn't make it. Damn, I should just fetched her in their mansion! I waited and waited but she never came.

Amaryllis:

Just go alone, Maverick. Don't wait for me because I've changed my mind. I'll agree on what my parents wants. I'll marry Draven. I don't love you and my conscience's eating me already. I'm in a relationship with Draven. Niloko lang kita. I'm sorry.

I call it bullshit. Because what the hell! Of all people, she's the one who wants to do it. I don't believe this shit.

She's in a relationship with who? Draven, the one who her parents wants for her? This is insane, I don't believe this shit. Maybe Rylli's phone isn't with her.

Fuck, her message says that she changed her mind and suddenly she's in a relationship with that man? You're fucking kidding me.

I waited. I know she'll come. We'll elope and get married in Russia after few weeks, when she turned eighteen. I waited until we missed our flight.

I didn't stop calling and messaging her even though I know her phone might not be with her. She's replying though, still firm on what she wants. That she won't come with me because she'll marry Draven. I texted and called her until she got tired of replying. She never answered the call too. Dahilan kung bakit tumindi ang hinala ko na wala nga sa kanya ang kanyang phone.

Maybe her parents caught her going out of the mansion. Maybe they got her phone.

I stayed in the airport, waiting for her. I won't go anywhere without her. Until morning came and a video was sent to me.

I wish I didn't watched that fucking thing. Tila nauupos ako habang pinapanood iyon. My head is in chaos while my heart... fuck. My heart's tightening in pain.

But a part of my is waiting for her, not wanting to believe what I've just saw. It still wasn't sinking in my mind but the flight I booked for the second time, is now ready to go so I send her a message.

Maverick:

I understand if you can't go. I'll go now. I love you. I always will, Rylli.

When I'm already inside the plane, that's when everything sunk in my mind. My mind is too clouded with anger that I didn't thought of anything.

Isang bagay lang ang hindi mawala wala sa aking isipan. That time when we're about to elope, I was waiting while she's in top of another man. Fuck it!

We lost communication just like before. I tried to forget her. My biological father's health was severely declining. Reason why I always run out of time. Idagdag pa ang pagpupumilit ni Katrice na sundin ang kung ano mang kalokohang gusto ng aking ama.

Those helped me temporarily get Amaryllis out of my mind. But every time I'm left alone, she'll always have her way in my mind. As well as that fucking video.

I deleted it the moment I saw a few seconds of it. Ni hindi ko tinapos dahil wala akong lakas para tapusin pa iyon. But every time I'll remember Amaryllis, what I saw on the video is fucking flashing back in my mind.

My father wants me to marry Katrice. That is insane. I won't marry her because every time I'll hear that word, it is always Amaryllis who'll came in my mind. That we should have been married right now if she came.

When my biological father's health continue deteriorating, we came back in the Philippines because he wanted to go back to that country. He said if he'll die, it would be in the Philippines.

Wala na rin akong nagawa dahil walang nag-aasikaso sa kompanya niya sa Pilipinas. I'll take over MPL just like what my father wanted.

That's when I started hearing rumors about Amaryllis again. Her family is very open to public as her father is now a famous senator. At sa muling pagtapak ng aking mga paa sa Pilipinas, hindi maiwasan na hindi makarinig ng mga balita tungkol kay Amaryllis. Her, being a lesbian is the most ridiculous rumor I've heard so far.

And the moment I learned that there's a pending partnership between MPL and Lofranco Moving and Logistics, I already know that the latter is owned by Amaryllis' family.

The thing I don't know is that she's the one handling it.

For a moment, I froze when the elevator opened and she came on my view. Her clothes were different from what she used to wear. Her hair is a bit shorter than usual. The rest, nothing changed. But I know its her. Because my fucking heart beats like shit the moment I saw her but it immediately tightened upon remembering what happened.

Katrice tugged my arm that woke me up from reverie. The emotion in my eyes vanished as I met Amaryllis. "Excuse me, miss. You're blocking our way," I muttered using a cold baritone voice.

And fuck. I saw how pain immediately registered in her eyes. You're hurt? Why the hell would you feel that? You're the one who made the decision on why we're both in this situation. Damn it.

On the day where the CEO of MPL and LM&L would sign the contract for the official partnership of the company, I was more composed than our first meeting.

Of course, I already know that she's the CEO, I'm expecting her.

It was her who seems shocked when we met again.

"Good morni—" nabitin sa ere ang pagbati niya nang nagtama ang aming mga mata.

"Good morning," I greeted in a flat tone before rising from my seat. Beside me is my secretary and the company lawyer who both rose too to greet Amaryllis.

My brow raised when she stilled. Kung hindi pa tinawag ng sekretarya niya ay hindi matitinag ito sa kinatatayuan.

She cleared her throat as she started walking towards her seat.

Nahuli ko ang pagbulong ni Amaryllis sa sariling sekrerarya.

"Yes, Ma'am." That's all I've heard from her secretary.

Tumango siya bago lumayo sa sekretarya. "Let's start," Amaryllis announced while pulling the chair and comfortably sat on it.

I don't know what's with me and my eyes keeps on following her. Agad na dumako ang mga mata ni Amaryllis sa dokumentong nasa harapan niya. She took the contract lying on the table and started scanning it.

I let out a deep sigh as she seems lost while staring at the contract. Bago pa ako malunod sa katititig sa kanya ay sinaway ko na ang sarili.

"Can you leave us for awhile?" I ordered, pertaining to our secretary and the company lawyer.

Umangat ang tingin ni Amaryllis ngunit hindi ko muna iyon binigyang pansin.

"Sir?" Aina slowly blinked while tilting her head. Tila sinisiguro kung tama ba ang narinig niya mula sa akin.

"We'll talk about the partnership."

"But, Sir--"

"Aina," I called using a warning tone when she tried to decline.

"Alright, Sir." Agaran itong tumayo, pati na rin ang abogado.

Amaryllis' eyes turned to her secretary. When she nodded, that's when her secretary rose and moved from her seat to leave us alone.

I watched Amaryllis as her eyes fixated at the contract. I don't know why I made the others leave. One thing is for sure, it wasn't because I'll talk to Amaryllis about the partnership of the two companies.

The conference room's door closed. Ibinalik ni Amaryllis ang aking mga titig.

"Can we now start?" she asked. "If you're wondering if I already know the important details of the partnership because I'm not in the meeting the last time, don't worry, I already did."

I felt a frown slowly forming in my forehead. How can she act like this, huh? Like she didn't know me before. Like she didn't ditch our plan to elope. Like she didn't... cheat on me.

Fuck!

Hindi ko mabilang kung ilang beses kong itinanggi iyon sa sarili. But I was a fool for refusing to believe it when it was clear. I was certain it was Amaryllis who's on that video. I don't know who the fuck is the man, if it's really that Draven Ynares, I fucking don't care. I just don't. Damn it.

"Ilang beses ko nang binasa ang nilalaman ng kontrat--"

"You'll really pretend that you don't know me, huh?" Hindi na ako nakatiis. I rudely cutted her words.

Pinagmasdan ko kung paano siya natigilan at napatuwid ng upo. Sinalubong niya ang aking mga mata. I caught a glimpse of emotion in it. An emotion I do not want to believe.

"Maverick." My name from her lips feels familiar... yet odd at the same time. It was full of emotion. Ngunit tila hindi ko kayang paniwalaang ang emosyong iyon. I refused to believe it.

Kulang na lang ay umiling ako upang ipakita ang pagkadismaya. "What scheme are you playing, right now?"

Her lips slowly parted while she tilted her head. Kunot ang kanyang noo at tila hindi makuha ang aking sinabi. "H–hindi ko alam ang sinasabi mo."

Goddamned it.

"Pretending to be a lesbian?" Mapait na sambit ko. I don't get her. A lesbian really? We've known each other for years and fuck! She's far from being a lesbian. Maybe it was her parents. They're ordering her around again. "Is that what your father told you? Perhaps, to protect his image because he has a slutty daughter?"

Those words fucking slipped off my mouth. I want to curse myself for that. Agad ako iyong pinagsisihan nang makita na bumalatay ang sakit sa mukha niya. The calmness in her face was immediately replaced by pain and a glimpse of betrayal.

Ngunit hindi ko binawi ang aking sinabi. Instead, I added more fucking words that insulted her.

I slowly shook my head in disappointment. What a fucking fool I am.

Months had passed. Slowly, we're getting closer again while fixing everything bits by bits. I apologized for every shits I've said but I know it wasn't enough. It would never be enough as the damage has been done already.

Everything seems alright until her private video leaked on the public. The video that I forgot and buried went out on public.

"Fuck!" I cursed. Mariin akong napapikit nang muling mahagip ng aking mga mata ang video sa aking laptop. The video was sent by an unknown, saying its already out on public.

My grip on the phone tightened. "Remove those fucking videos! Make sure no one can download or spread it again. And I need proofs against whoever posted it. I have a hunch who but I need proofs so I can sue that fucker," I ordered someone I know over the phone.

If Rylli's really in a relationship with that Ynares before we even planned to elope, then possibly, that Ynares is the man on the video. At sino pa bang magpapakalat noon? If there's a video, the first one who'll have it is either Draven or Amaryllis. But heck! Rylli won't spread it on public! I assume it's that fucking Ynares. Because that—even if there's Amaryllis' concern when videotaping it—will surely hurt her.

Sa ganoong posisyon ako nadatnan ni Amaryllis. Agad kong pinatay ang tawag nang matantong papalapit si Rylli sa aking kama. A baffled look is evident in her dark orbs as her eyes were fixed on my bed. Sinundan ko ang linya ng kanyang mga mata at natantong ang laptop ko ang tinititigan niya. Nakabukas iyon at nakaharap sa kanyang direksyon.

Damn. I immediately stride towards my bed and reached the laptop before hastily shutting it closed.

Sinalubong ko siya gamit ang malalaking hakbang. My arms encircled around her, stopping her as I know her eyes is still on my laptop. "You don't have to see that. I'll fix everything."

"W-what's happening?" Her voice trembled. I don't know if she have a hunch in what's happening or maybe she knew it already. Spencer and her father called her, maybe for that reason.

Marahan siyang sumubok na humiwalay sa akin. But I didn't even moved and just continue hugging her, hoping for her to stop and not mind it any longer. But she didn't. She forcefully pushed me away. Hindi na ako lumaban, hinayaan ko siyang makawala mula sa aking mga bisig at agad siyang tumakbo sa direksyon ng aking laptop.

"Amaryllis!" Sinubukan po pa siyang pigilan ngunit dahil siguro ay may hinuha na rin siya, kaya't tila wala siyang narinig ang nagpatuloy lang sa pagbubukas noon.

She kneeled on the floor as she faced my laptop that's still lying on my bed.

"Fuck," I inwardly cursed when she finally saw what's in it.

I tightly shut my eyes closed the moment the video started playing and low moans filled the room.

My head tilted away from it as I can't continue watching it. The memories years ago started flashing back in my mind but it stopped when I realized Rylli froze from where she's kneeling.

I clenched my jaw and walked towards the laptop. Marahas ko iyong isinara kahit pa napanood na iyon ni Rylli.

Napaupo si Amaryllis sa sahig at agad ko siyang dinaluhan. I slowly traced her body as I encircled my arms around her. And that's when I realized that tears are already cascading down her cheeks. "I'll find who posted it. I'll sue him, A–Amaryllis. I promise you that."

My body was trembling in anger as I tried to calm us both by tightly hugging her from the back.

"W–would you believe if I say... I was se–sexually assaulted in t–that video?" 

I instantly froze behind her. Those words from her made my head ache. Tila mabibiyak ang aking ulo sa sinabi niya. I know I fucking heard it clear.

Iyon ang nakapagpatulala sa akin. A deafening silence consumed the two of us.

Putangina.

I want to bash my head on the wall. I'm a fucking fool for judging her video without knowing the truth. And I can't forgive myself for that. Upon remembering every hurtful things I said, I have no fucking rights to be with her again. And I am a fucking thick faced for still wanting to be with her.

I did everything to erase those fucking videos with the help of Spencer's team.

The moment I personally see Draven Ynares, I was livid. Napigilan ko ang aking sarili sa loob ng ilang minuto, lalo na at naroon si Rylli at ang pamilya niya.

But it's slowly ticking me off every time there's a word coming out of his mouth. Tila lahat ng lumalabas sa bibig niya ay walang kwenta, dahilan kung bakit hindi na ako nakapagpigil. I punched him to death until I'm sated.

When Amaryllis' family decided to file a case against Draven Ynares, I instantly thought she needs a lawyer. I know a friend who can surely win her case but seems her father knew him too.

It was Atty. Fonacier. Laking pasalamat ko nang siya ang kuhaning abogado ng mga Lofranco lalo na at tinanggap ni Archer ang kaso.

I stayed beside her throughout the process as much as possible. Makabawi man lang ako sa mga kagaguhang pinagsasabi ko. Ngunit alam kong hindi iyon sapat at kahit ano pang gawin ko ay nasaktan ko na si Rylli dahil sa mga salitang iyon.

I did everything I can to help in every way she needed it. Spencer has been too hands-on too on Rylli's case. That's a given because Rylli's his friend.

But I am a man and I know how we look at the woman we like and it was different than the way we look at our friends. Spencer likes Amaryllis.

And I was right when he confessed to me. It was the night when Rylli's video spreaded on public, at the Lofranco's mansion when we both were about to go.

"I like Amaryllis."

Natigilan ako sa pagbubukas ng pinto ng aking kotse nang malinaw kong marinig ang mga salitang sinambit ni Spencer. "Why are you telling me?"

Muli kong isinara ang pinto at hinarap siya. He leaned on his car that's just a few walks away from mine.

He shrugged. "I want to get it out of my chest.

Marahan akong lumapit sa kinaroroonan niya gamit ang mga pinong hakbang. "Hindi ba dapat, sa taong gusto mo sinasabi ang mga 'to? So it'll get out of your chest? You should tell her. Confess to her. You're her friend... you've been with her when no one did. You deserve her."

If there's someone who deserves to be with Rylli, it was Spencer. Sa dami ng nagawa ni Spencer para kay Rylli,  sobra-sobra ang mga iyon. But... that doesn't mean I'll just let him be with Rylli. I know I've said horrible things to her but I'll fight. I won't just let him be with her just because I thought he deserves her.

He eyed me for a quite while before shaking his head. "Nah. You think she'll be happy if I confess? I don't wanna ruin our friendship."

"Don't you wanna try? Paano kung ikaw pala ang pipiliin niya?"

Nahihiwagaan siyang napatuwid ng tayo. Bahagya pang natawa. "If the question is... who is the best friend, you'll surely lose over me. She'll choose me," he proudly smirked.

I smirked. Of course he is, I knew it.

"But if it's about who's the one she loves the most. There's no competition in that because there's only one, Maverick. We both know that's you."

Spencer doesn't want to entertain what he's feeling for Rylli. Sapat na raw sa kanyang makatulong siya bilang kaibigan. He even asked if it's fine with me that he's friends with Rylli knowing that he have feelings for her.

"Fine with it. I have no problem if you two were friends."

He smirked. "You should be. Pakialam ko naman kung hindi ka payag?" pabalang na sagot niya. Ngunit hindi sumama ang pakiramdam ko roon. Hindi direktang sinabi ngunit tila ipinahihiwatig niyang kaibigan ang turing niya sa akin.

Napailing na lamang ako at mababang napatawa.

I still stayed with Rylli the whole process as I know she needs someone beside her. Kahit hanggang natapos ang proseso at nakulong si Draven ay nanatili pa rin ako. And I want to stay too. I know I don't deserve her but fuck! I'll do something about it. I'll make everything I can until I finally desyerve to be with her.

Everything went fine the moment Draven got convicted. I was aware that, no matter what happen, even Draven rot in jail my wrath for him wouldn't vanish. Dahilan kung bakit may parte sa akin na kahit nakakulong na siya ay hindi ako nakukuntento. I visited him to see if he's struggling.

After knowing that he do struggle in everyday life inside the jail, it was somehow enough for me. Walang nagawa ang mga magulang niya upang ilabas siya roon.

Akala ko, iyon na lahat ang ginawa ni Draven. But I was wrong. Sobra-sobrang pahirap pa ang binigay niya kay Rylli.

"D–Draven got me pregnant," she confessed while we're in an orphanage.

She asked me to go with her in here. At first, I thought it was just a sudden visit. Na bigla lang niyang naisipan na bumisita sa isang bahay-ampunan ngunit mali ako.

She said, she got pregnant because of what Draven did years ago. I don't know how would I react on that.

The first two things that instantly came in my mind are how did Rylli handled it and second, what happened to the baby?

The first one, I know it was hard for her. She told me her family sent her to States and she's alone. Kalaunan lang niya nakilala si Spencer at laking pasalamat ko na naroon siya para kay Rylli. But how did she handled it when she's alone? Noong hindi pa niya nakikilala si Spencer?

I am not violent but every time I'll remember Draven and what he did to Amaryllis, I can't help but become one.

My second question was answered when Amaryllis continued. Habang nanginginig ang boses niya lalo kong nararamdaman na kulang pa ang pagkakakulong ni Draven.

"I planned to abort it but in the end, I didn't. But months after giving birth to the baby, I–I left her in an orphanage." Her voice is becoming inaudible as she continue.

Nag-angat siya ng tingin at pilit na sinalubong ang aking mga mata. "I–I'm sorry, Mav. W–will you still accept me after knowing those?"

We're staring at each other's eyes for a quite while before I sighed. I'll admit that it was wrong to leave the child in the orphanage. I know it was hard for her to do it but she have no choice as somehow, I know the child reminds her of what Draven did. Dahil ganoon din ang aking ina.

I know my mother's struggling to see me everyday as I am a reminder of what my biological father did to her. I may not be on my mother's situation but I know it hurts. The scars would always be there.

I even remember seeing my mother silently crying when I was a child. Minsan naman ay tahimik lang at malayo ang tingin ngunit blanko ang mga mata. At hindi man niya aminin, alam kong dahil iyon sa ginawa ng aking ama.

Iyon ang dahilan kung bakit kahit minsan pisikal niya akong nasasaktan ay hindi ko magawang magalit. At noong pinaalis ako at itinulak sa ama ay sumunod na lamang ako.

But in those times, every time that I'm here, hindi ko nakaliligtaan na dalawin sila ni Papa. Hindi na lang ako nagpapakita. It seems that they have a better life in the province, especially my mother.

Kaya alam kong ganoon din si Amaryllis. Naiintindihan ko ang naging desisyon niya sa naging bunga ng ginawa ni Draven.

"I love you, Rylli," I stated. I want her to know that no matter what happened, my love for her would stay intact. "Why are you even saying sorry?"

"B–because of what I did to the... baby."

I heaved an audible breath. "Are you happy? Do you think your decision is right? Was it worth it?"

Pinagmasdan ko ang marahang pagbuka ng kanyang mga labi. "It w–wasn't right but that helps me... to continue. H–hindi ako makakatagal kung araw-araw kong nakikita ang bata na bunga ng ginawa sa akin ni Draven. I won't k–kill myself but I'll probably lose my mind as the days passed by and I'm seeing the kid. I'm sorry."

I understand. Really, she doesn't have to say sorry. Kung ako lang ang iniisip niya, hindi na dapat siya mag-alala. Because I won't be mad at her for what she did.

Haven of Hope Orphanage.

This is where she left her child. The first time I saw Hetty smiling, I instantly recognized their resemblance. Tila bumalik ako sa nakaraan noong iilang taong gulang pa lamang kami. The girl's smile looks the same with Rylli. I saw that Amaryllis is fond of Hetty too. Malapit siya sa bata at ganoon din ang bata sa kanya.

Still, I don't want to assume that she's really her daughter. But when Mother Josie told us about the things Spencer did for the kid, noon lumala ang kutob ko. It was like we already know who her daughter is. We only need confirmation from Spencer.

At sa huli, tama nga na si Hetty ang anak ni Rylli. I have no problem with it. Besides, I've already accepted the child like she's my own. I don't care who her father is. Walang kasalanan ang bata sa nagawa ni Draven kay Amaryllis.

Even before I decided to adopt Hetty, I already thought of marrying Amaryllis. Fuck, I was ready even years ago.

At ganoon pa rin ang nararamdaman ko para kay Amaryllis. Gusto ko pa rin siyang pakasalan.

"We won't elope this time and there'll be no one against us." I can't help but smile when I got a chance to see her reaction after realizing what I'm doing.

"Will you finally marry me, Rylli?" I asked while kneeling and offering her the ring in my hands.

Her hands flew on her mouth. Makailang ulit siyang tumango bago tuluyang sumagot. "Yes! Yes, I will marry you, Maverick!"

I froze upon hearing her and I was oblivious that I'm not breathing until she answered. A lone tear escaped my eye as her answered echoed in my ears.

Hindi na dapat ako nagulat ngunit hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili. I mean, we informally talked about this before I officially adopted Hetty. We planned to elope and get married too before.

Ngunit hindi ko alam na ganoon kasaya na marinig iyon mula sa mga labi niya.

We're ready to marry each other years ago. Ganoon pa rin iyon ngayon. The only difference is, right now, after long years of hoping, we're finally both alright.

No matter how long we've been apart, no matter how many years we haven't talk to, what I'm feeling for her haven't changed a bit. Well, somehow it changed.

Ngunit imbis na mabawasan ang pagmamahal ko sa kanya dahil sa ilang taong hindi namin pagkikita at inakala ko pang niloko niya ako, hindi nangyari iyon. No matter how I tried to forget everything about her, I failed. Instead, what I'm feeling for her got deeper than before.

I have a hunch that it'll penetrate my insides more when we got married. I have no problem with that though. I'd willingly fall deeper, just for her.

__________

February 2022