Maclain's POV
I stared at the paper with the lyrics I wrote. It's been a month, I haven't seen Mr.RichAss. No calls, no nothing. But do I care? Fuck no. Not one bit. Not at all.

"Maybe a bit." I mumbled to myself.

I hate you
I love you
Don't want to

Uggggghhh and that song already exists!

I balled up the paper and shot it towards the trash can. It landed on the ground sadly. But I wasn't gonna pick it up. I threw my head back looking up at the cieling. Memories and thoughts flooded me. Memories occurring like they all just happened yesterday. And I just started writing.

Bitter sweet was my remedy
No love could ever cure me
All the riches and gold, I won't let it change me
I rather have a stroke
Then let myself get washed away
Every little country bumpkin
Changing who they are
You're not really a star
If you can't stick to who you are
And I know how hard it is
To be who you are
When everyone around you want something more
So let these words mend your souk
Never let money change who you are
Bitter sweet love, led to fame
Fuck this shit I'm calling quits
Candle lights and rose petals
Soft kisses and cuddles
Would I really buy a thousand cars?
Hell no, not even if I could afford it
I just need one house, I could get two
Don't need all the fancy clothes
But of course I gotta put on a show
This bitter sweet life of mine
Never thought I'd be who I am today
Livin this way
Drugs everywhere
Money in the air
Sex here sex there
Hate spreading like wild fore
My desires,
Too fearful
So I lock them in cage
Can love really mend a broken heart caused by it?
I mean I've been livin this bitter sweet life for so long
No home for my heart to call home
This bitter sweet taste
Is it sweeter?
Or is it just bitter?
Don't need love
My heart denies
All I'm saying is what's on my mind
My brain sayin I got me and I
But my heart says I need another hand in mine
My brain denies
Don't need it Don't want it
This bitter sweet life
I've lost it twice
This bitter sweet life
Is costing my heart line
This bitter sweet life
Of mine

I scanned through the lyrics I wrote then smiled. I let out a breath leaning back in the chair.

"One song....thirteen more to fucking go." I said huffing.

My phone rung and I groaned reaching for it. I answered it without looking at the caller I.D.

"Hello?" I said.

"You sound tired."

My eyes widen and I looked at the caller I.D.

"You called." I said and heard a door close.

"Yeah, I've been very busy." he said and I bit my lip spinning in the chair.

"Uh huh." I said.

"I'm guessing you've been waiting for me to call." he teased.

"Eh." I said putting my arm behind my head.

"Eh? Are you okay?" he asked.

I hate you

"I'm fine." I said.

"You don't sound fine." he said.

"Actually I just don't sound fine, I am fine." I said winking like he was there.

"Funny." he said and I knew he was probably smirking. "Anyway what's really going on?" he asked.

"I'm fine." I said again.

"Your lying." he said and I pushed up out of my chair.

"So, why do you care anyway?" I asked and it was silent. I smirked walking out my room. "I'll just go since you se-" I started to say.

"Maclain, meet me at a restaurant." he said and my eyes widen.

"Huh?" I asked.

"Don't be late." he said and hung up.

I blinked still processing what just happened. Then I gasped and called him.

"Mr. Lawrence here." he said.

"RichAss I am not going anywhere with you, I don't need my life endangered." I hissed.

"You never thought about it before so why now, you seem afraid of something." he said.

"Yeah! That people will be on my ass!" I yelled and he laughed.

"Maclain, what are you really afraid of?" he asked and I stayed silent.

"I....I'm busy." I said and hung up.

I ignored his calls, probably other peoples calls too. I needed to be alone. So I decided to clean the place I call home.

"Stop calling stop calling, I don't wanna talk anymore I got head and my heart on the dance floor." I sung ignoring my phone that was ringing and turned my music up.

I heard a knock on my door. I paused my music and went to the door. I looked through the peep hole and groaned as I unlocked the door and opened it.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked glaring at Mr.RichAss. "Plus how in the hell did you-" I started to say but he let himself in ignoring me.

"Cramp place, you should live in my place but you'll have to pay to stay." he said and I scoffed before closing the door then locked it.

"What do you want?" I asked leaning back on the door with my arms crossed.

"You." he said and I started coughing.

Shouldn't have shocked me as much as it did.

"Wha-What?" I squeaked and he smirked.

Damn my voice and my fucking face feels hot.

"Anyway about the living with me." he said completely ignoring what he just said.

Ugh I swear this man.

"I'm not going to live with you." I said walking past him.

"Why not?" he asked following me to the kitchen.

"Because." I said and he raised a eyebrow.

"Because?" he asked.

"Because I don't want to pay a rich basterd." I said and he laughed.

"Your not paying me with money." he said smirking.

Stop it.

I didn't realize I said it out loud or that I was shaking.

"Maclain?" he asked.

That concern and worry in his voice is just bullshit. Bullshit on top of bullshit.

"Stop it...stop showing up.....I'm not a fucking toy." I felt my eyes burn.

No no no NO!

"Maclain." his voice went soft.

Stop talking like you care....like your trying to help....

"All you men want is sex." I said gripping the counter. "What about fucking love...." I mumbled.

Damn it.....karma is a fucking bitch. Did I hurt the guys I dated this bad.....I deserve it.....It's my fault. I'm a stripper after all....a slut.

His eyes widen staring at me.

I keep saying these things out loud....damn it.

"I hate you." I whimpered shaking. "Your just like fucking Zachary!" I cried and all of a sudden my face was buried in something warm. "I hate you...I hate you so much.....fuck you." I said wiping my eyes.

"Maclain.....I'm sorry." I heard him say.

"Shut up.....your not sorry. All I am is a sex toy." I mumbled.

"Maclain I....I don't think your just a sex toy." he said and I pushed him away rubbing my eyes.

I cried.....I fucking cried. And what's worse is not that I let someone see me be weak but I let Calvin see me be weak.

"Go away, don't come back. Don't call me, text me, nothing." I heard myself say.

"Okay...." I heard him say then I heard footsteps going farther away and eventually I heard my front door open then close.

XD damn this chapter is emotional (wipes eyes) anyways, loooove ya honey bees peace oooout.