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CHAPTER THREE
you're not around
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IT HAS BEEN days since Jonah started working and Piper still couldn't bring herself to smile and joke with him like she did the first day of his training. It felt like all her energy had been drained from her body, leaving her to walk with the husk of who she used to be. Gwen was concerned from day one do to how quickly it happened.

The girls had accidentally fallen asleep on the couch and Piper was fine, but when Gwen woke up the next morning, she wouldn't tell anymore, but she swore she heard Piper crying in the bathroom downstairs. The two didn't talk about it, figuring that when Piper was ready, she would tell her friend, but it had nearly been a week, Pipers birthday is coming up, and she doesn't leave her bedroom when she comes home.

It was January 22, a day before Pipers birthday and she struggled to get out of bed on days she didn't work. That was quickly forced to change when her brown haired, brown eyed neighbor barged into her room, snacks and waters piled a mile high in her arms.

"I don't know what happened, but I'm not leaving this room until you work it out with me, you have lunch with the boy's mums on tomorrow and you're not missing it," Gwen stated firmly and with authority, "otherwise I'm dragging you out of bed and you can look and smell like a hobo at whatever restaurant you're eating at."

Piper groaned, her eyebrows furrowing at the noise, she didn't want to get up. She went to cover her head with her comforter but Gwen didn't allow for this happen, a disappointed "nuh-uh" was heard.

"Piper is this a mood cycle that I didn't know about?" Gwen asked, genuine concern in her tone, "Are you supposed to be taking medication for something?"

Piper silently shook her head, grabbing her phone and showing her the texts she had with Luke nearly a week ago.

piper
is Michael, like, ignoring me? please be honest,
I haven't heard from him in three months.

penguin boy
piper, i talked to mike and
im so sorry.

it took me forever to
get it out of him but hes
basically cut everyone out
except for us and his parents.
we're trying to fix him but ash
is on the verge of just straight
up decking him so its slow progress

piper
no, don't bother, if this
becomes a huge band fight i
dont want it to be over me.

penguin boy
i'm so sorry. pipes

cal, ash, and I dont want
to lose you

piper
you wont, youre still
my boys, that wont change.

i just need some time right now,
feel free to still send pics, just make
sure he's not in them.

Gwen nearly threw the phone at the wall but opted for the bed space next to Piper.

"I'm so sorry Pipes," Gwen said softly, "He's a fucking dickhead, he doesn't deserve you."

Tears were beginning to form again but Piper was tired of crying, she knew she had to get up, she knew that staying in bed until the tour was over wasn't going to make this all feel better. At least seeing the mums would make feel better. Piper wondered if Karen knew what Michael did.

That wouldn't be the case. Otherwise, Michael would be back home already and practically handcuffed to Piper. Karen Clifford was a drill sergeant when it came to manners and raising a gentleman. If she knew, Michael would be in the desert. Piper giggled, leaving her and Gwen shocked.

"Sorry, I was thinking of what Karen would do to Michael if she knew what he did," Piper giggled a little more, "I need to ask Luke who all knows what when it comes to this."

Gwen nodded, tossing a pack of fruit gummies and a water bottle into Pipers lap. the girls quietly enjoyed the snacks, making fun of stupid things about Michael, laughing and giggling until Piper found the energy to get herself out of bed and into her shower. Gwen had tasked herself with getting the garbage out of Pipers room and tidying up, Piper was grateful for it,

When she was clean and in fresh clothes, she felt lighter, a glance over at her keyboard made her want to finish that song she started. She walked over and sat down at her keyboard, her notebook open to the phrases she had written already. They weren't enough. She ripped the page out, crumpling it and letting it fall to the floor, she'll pick it up when she's done.

She started the tune again, putting more passion into the keys as she practically smashed them down into the board, she wished she was sitting at a real piano, it definitely would give the power that she's wanting into the notes. As she continued her chord progression, she continued to think about her words. They didn't have the impact she wanted. Like an unspoken prayer came to her, the words started to spill out of Piper as if she had been holding back for years.

"I know you're tryin' to make it, bit by bit,
But I'm lost in this world of doubt,
Can't escape this pain, it's relentless,
My heart's been shattered, there's no way out.

I know you're tryin' to make it, still we're both survivin',
But I can't pretend, that's when you stole my love,
I don't wanna feel this hurt again,
I don't wanna feel this pain again,
I don't wanna feel this hurt again.

'Cause if you don't love me, then I won't love you,
If you don't need me, then I won't need you,
If you don't want me, then I won't want you.

Bit by bit, we fell apart, piece by piece,
Through the darkness, we couldn't find our way,
Now I'm drowning in the tears that are fallin',
My soul's in fragments, can't make it okay.

I know you're tryin' to make it, still we're both survivin',
But I can't pretend, that's when you stole my love,
I don't wanna feel this hurt again,
I don't wanna feel this pain again,
I don't wanna feel this hurt again.

'Cause if you don't love me, then I won't love you,
If you don't need me, then I won't need you,
If you don't want me, then I won't want you.

I used to believe in our forever,
But now I'm just lost in the storm,
The love that we had, it's all gone,
And now I'm left here, so torn.

I know you're tryin' to make it, day by day,
But it's time for me to find my way,
I'll mend my heart, bit by bit, step by step,
Though it's tough, I'll emerge, no regrets.

I know you're tryin' to make it, still we're both survivin',
But I can't pretend, that's when you stole my love,
I don't wanna feel this hurt again,
I don't wanna feel this pain again,
I don't wanna feel this hurt again.

'Cause if you don't love me, then I won't love you,
If you don't need me, then I won't need you,
If you don't want me, then I won't want you.

Now we're parting ways, hearts shattered in two,
But I'll find the strength, you know it's true,
If you don't love me, then I won't love you,
If you don't need me, then I won't need you,
If you don't want me, then I won't want you, bit by bit."

Piper had periodically stopped to write down lyrics and piano notes as she continued to dig further and further into the work until she had her song at the end. By the end, she propped her notebook up, finding her tempo, she played the song for herself one last time, careful choosing pockets to breathe before she belted her bridge, finding the pain that she poured out onto the paper was beginning its pilgrimage out of her heart.

The pain wasn't gone by the end of the song, but she was no longer crippled by it. Gwen entered the room, her eyes wide and her jaw dropped. she looked over at the keyboard and then back at Piper. She felt her face flush as she tried hiding behind her damp hair.

"Piper, oh my god," Gwen finally spoke, "Fuck Michael, he was holding you back!"

Piper snorted as she stood up from the keyboard, picking up her notebook and closing it up. tossing her pencil back onto her desk next to the keyboard. She used to sit there for hours while she and Michael brainstormed songs instead of doing homework. Well, while Piper wasn't doing homework.

"I don't know, this was always more of a hobby, I'm not good with performances," Piper remembered the one and only time she ever performed, Calum was extremely sick that day and thankfully Piper knew the bassline for their setlist. She almost hurled on every one in the first three rows during Heartbreak Girl.

Cameras were easier, she used to be very active on YouTube before the band, she and Luke had actually become close friends over that, before the band, it was their channels. Piper's channel was gaining traction and she used that platform to try and help elevate Luke's, she loved his passion for music and she wanted to help him.

"Well, when that changes, trust me, you'll be topping the charts," Gwen assured her, "Now, what are you wearing tomorrow? Should you wear a revenge dress for Karen to show Michael?"

Piper couldn't contain her laughter as she walked over to her closet, sorting through her flannels to try and find a nice top to wear with her jeans, now she wished had listened to her mum when she told her to not use all her money on band shirts.

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WAKING UP ON her birthday always felt anti-climatic. Growing up, watching coming of age movies, the girl in the film always seemed to wake up to a celebration right then and there. That wasn't the case when she woke up, at least that's what she thought until her mom bust open the door with a huge box laid over her arms, and another two flat presents laid overtop of that. Piper thought that would be the end of it but then Gwen came in after with a small bag in one hand and Pipers video camera open and recording in another.

"Guys, the camera right when I've woke up?" Piper joked.

"Absolutely, I want to record this moment to use whenever you're mad at me," Rebecca smirked, it was an obvious joke, making Piper rolled her eyes at the comment, "The records are from Luke, Cal, and Ash, they came in this morning."

"You're so dramatic," Piper replied as she picked up the flat, square presents.

Instead of wondering what new records they bought her, she tore them open, discovering that she now owned Mad Sounds by Artic Monkeys and a replacement for Brand New Eyes by Paramore. Luke and Cal had promised they would replace the record after rough-housing in her room, her poor record was caught in the crossfire, how they managed to break the first one in half so cleanly was overlooked by her rage. They paid for that for 2 weeks but it looks like they never forgot.

Piper eyed the large box in her lap, there wasn't much that Piper had really set her heart on wanting so this had her even more curious. She closed her eyes, pulling the paper apart so that when she opened them, she could take it all in. When she was sure that all the paper was gone, she opened her eyes. Pipers jaw could've broken the earths crust with how far down it dropped.

On her lap was a Martin & Co. box, the noise that came out of Piper was a mix between a squeaking door and a dying cat. To not ruin the integrity of the box, she carefully removed the tape, her heart racing as she slowly opened the box for the sake of being careful.

Inside was the the bag that the guitar would be carried in, she carefully pulled that out as well, laying the box down on the ground next to her bed. Unzipping that, it was like the pearly gates had opened for her. The Martin LX - 1E stared up at her, waiting to be played, but she couldn't take her eyes off of it, especially since this was clearly Ed Sheeran's recently announced line. The vivid orange + screamed at her, and she couldn't miss the etched in symbol on the Sapele top.

"Oh my god," Piper finally spoke, looking up at her mother, "I love you so so so much."

Piper could say anything else, it was all that she repeated, stroking the neck of the guitar before picking it up. She started plucking at the strings, tuning them until they were all on their correct notes. She started to strum out the tune of the first song she ever learned, coincidentally it was a love song by Taylor Swift. She was humming along before she took a deep breath, the tears in her eyes fading.

"Thank you so much," She set the guitar aside gently to get out of bed and pull her mother into the tightest squeeze she had ever given in her life. That was a gift that she would probably keep with her until her dying day and even then, the guitar will probably be buried with her like she's a pharaoh.

Piper pulled away to look at Gwen who held out her own gift. The dark haired girl seemed especially excited for this as well.

"Hurry hurry, your cameras dying, God, why don't you charge this damn thing." Gwen said as Piper sat at the end of her bed, pulling the small box out of the bag.

The word "Pandora" made Piper eye Gwen nervously.

"You better not have spent too much money on me," Piper warned.

"Oh sure, she's not allowed to spend a lot of money on you," Her mother nudged her side, making Piper giggle as she opened the box, gasping at the contents.

In the box was a silver guitar pick on a dainty silver chain, the letter "P" etched into it with an opal stone studded into it. Piper pulled it up to admire it more closely, her heart racing.

"Oh, its beautiful," Piper looked up at Gwen, "Gwen..."

"Happy Birthday!" Gwen cheered on as Piper quickly put on the jewelry, she normally wore rubber bracelets and the earrings she got from the piercers when she first got them, so this was a huge step up in her accessories.

Piper walked over and hugged her friend, the squeeze was so tight, she could swear that she heard a few bones crack. She heard the camera snap close as Gwen wrapped her arms around her, relaxing after the spots in her back cracked. The words "Thank You" were all she could repeat over and over. Piper's mind blanked when it came to the English language, she was back to basics.

Gwen's laughter shook her body as she gave Piper one last squeeze before pulling away.

"You have to start getting ready for your lunch, we let you sleep in," Gwen advised her, "And I brought you a top to borrow."

The girl stepped out of the room and came back almost immediately with a plastic shopping bag in hand. She pulled out a purple top that she had sworn would be perfect for Piper. It wasn't elaborate, it was a short sleeve v neck. The V pointed down to three simple buttons that very clearly were there to add a little detail but they looked functional. Piper loved it.

"Oh, thank you!" She smiled brightly, accepting the shirt from the girl.

"Okay, I'll clear out, happy birthday, Baby," Her mom spoke up, "be ready to leave soon, Liz made a reservation for noon and I don't want you to be late."

When her mom left, Piper gave Gwen a sympathetic look.

"I wish you could come," Piper said softly as she walked over to her dresser to grab her bra before heading to the bathroom to get ready.

After freshening up and putting on light makeup, Piper walked out of the bathroom, the shirt on with no trousers. Gwen bristled at that detail as she suddenly became fascinated with Pipers keyboard. Her eyebrows furrowed when she noticed her friend and quickly looked around to find her clothes.

"Yeah, unfortunately my mom has me running errands today since she put gas into the car," Gwen sighed, "But I should be able to come over later tonight, and we'll be going out tomorrow night as well."

Piper nodded at that as she squinted at her black skirt in her closet. She had decided on her black jeans last night, but considering the restaurant Liz made reservations for, she didn't want to be underdressed. She quickly pulled it on before heading over to her sandals, it was warm outside yesterday, and Piper had recently got a manicure and a pedicure with her mother as a treat, so she wasn't feeling too conscious about anything.

The girls left Pipers room to be greeted by her mom who opted for a plain button up and slacks. Casual, yet classy. Rebecca Alexander smiled at the sight of her daughter, and Piper can already feel the awkwardness of having to take pictures creep in. One look in her mothers eyes and she already knew what was going to come out of the woman's mouth.

"Get the camera when you go downstairs," Rebecca spoke before stepping back into her room, probably for her purse.

Piper internalized her groan before heading down the stairs with Gwen. the two girls headed down. She set up the camera as her mom came down, that's when Gwen got her bright idea.

"Why don't I take photos of you two together?" She asked, taking the camera from Pipers hand, winking at her as she did.

Piper looked over at her mom who lit up at the suggestion. The two walked over to the wall below the stairs, standing side by side as Rebecca put an arm around her daughter, leaning into her for the photo. Piper put on her best smile for the camera as Gwen snapped a few shots. Thankfully, with Gwen being the one to hold the camera, Piper wasn't asked to do a bunch of ridiculous poses by her mother.

Soon, they were all out of the house, Gwen going back to her own as Piper and her mother headed to the restaurant where her friends mums waited for them.

The women were so warm as they all stood up to give Piper the tightest hugs she's ever received. Other than Ann Marie, who has only known her for the last year and a half, these women have watched Piper grow up since 2011. Karen had held onto Piper the tightest. She had probably known the girl the best considering how close she was with Michael before he left.

"Aw, Piper I just can't believe you're 18 already!" Joy, Calum's mother spoke up, her smile so wide, the crinkles around her eyes accentuated the warmness she always exuded.

"Time flies," Rebecca rubbed the spot between pipers shoulder blades, "Just yesterday I was in the hospital room with her for the first time."

The mom's cued in with their "awe's" as some of them seemed tearful. Piper felt the urge to curl inward at the attention but she forced herself to put her chin up. She knew that these moms just want to express their affection to her. It was also her damn birthday and she deserved to be celebrated after what she's been put through since her friends left.

After instilling that in her mind, being with them wasn't so hard, soon the conversation moved on, the elephant in the room addressed.

"Has Luke sounded weird to you lately?" Liz asked, "The way he's been texted me has just been... odd, I don't know how to explain it."

"It may just be the fact that he's on a tour," Piper shrugged as she sipped from her water, "Cal and Ash have been a bit weird too, I think for Luke, breaking up with Aleisha and then immediately leaving the country to perform might have just been a bad combination, I think he'll readjust soon, the boys just need some time to work out their own schedules outside of what they're already doing."

"What about Michael? Has he been weird with you? It's like pulling teeth when we have phone calls," Karen sighed as she aggressively stabbed the lettuce of her salad, "How was London? Good? What was the crowd like tonight? Fine. Like Jesus, kid, give me something here!"

Piper pressed her lips into a fine line as she swirled her spoon in her soup, contemplating on how she wanted to answer the woman. Part of her wanted to be petty and go into detail of everything she's learned about Michael in the past few months, but another part doesn't want to ruin the tour for everyone with the drama that would come with this information being relayed to his mom.

"I think he may just be tired, when they get their next break I'm sure he'll be more talkative, you know he'll talk you ear off when he's got the energy for it," Piper assured Karen, a forceful smile on her face as she focused on her soup, she would be getting alfredo when the waiter came back to ask for entrees but she really needed her mom to come in with a subject change.

"Piper's going to be on her first bar crawl with Gwen tomorrow!" Rebecca took the hint, perking up at making Piper the conversation topic again, "They're heading out to the rocks tomorrow after Piper gets off work."

"Aw that's fun, what bars do you plan to go to out there?" Anna Marie smiled at the welcome subject change.

"Oh I'm not a hundred percent sure on the full list, Gwen's been keeping it a surprise, but she's been raving on about the Push so that's probably going to be the first place we go to depending on how impatient she gets about how quickly we get there," Piper admitted, "It'll be fun to go back out there outside of harassing the owners to let the boys perform there."

The moms started to go on about their first bar crawls back when they first became legal, going on about their crazy experiences with drinks they can barely think of before getting a little nauseous. It made for good entertainment as they now waited for their entrees.

"Are you still at the Record Shop with Mr. Weissman?" Liz asked, crunching on some of her chicken.

"Yeah, I'm working the opening shift now that I've trained the new guy," Piper explained, she could feel the University question looming towards the table.

"And school? Have you enrolled anywhere?" Joy asked. There it was.

"Not yet, I'm not sure if I want to go local or try my luck somewhere in America, though it'll be weird spending my Januaries being cold if I did that," Piper pondered, "I'm taking a year off to see what I want to do before I go to school for it, and that's if I even need to go to school for it."

The moms seemed satisfied with that answer, so they were going on about their other kids, Liz, Anna Marie, and Joy all had more than one child, that was another thing that brought Michael and Piper closer. No one understood what it was like being an only child, Michael did, not that she ever saw him like a brother, more so just someone she could share a struggle with.

Pipers mood nearly soured at how quickly her brain switched to thinking of Michael. She spun fork through her pasta, pushing thoughts of him away as she tried listening to these women. All of them had accepted her into their families, the bond she shared with them were all unique and special, she was glad that the boys absence didn't stop that love from them.

Lord knows that sentiment didn't stop some other band members.

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3.7k words

CRAZYYYY!!

also disclaimer, if anyone steals the song that silentwishing  and I poured our HEARTS into, I'm pulling up to your house and I'm fighting everyone inside.

Everyone's ass getting kicked idc if granny was just visiting, these hands are rated e for everyone. So if you don't want me to turn your home into the thunder dome, don't you dare touch our song.

That being said I'm considering posting a silly little cover but idk if I want y'all to hear my voice so... I'll keep you updated on that.

Anyways!!! we're heading to the halfway point in part one and I'm just so excited about this story, so get ready because my hyperfixation is going to go crazy here in a minute.

Thank you all for your support and I'll see you all at the next update!!

-greta!