6 October 2014

-Kait

I went to the park on Saturday with Harry, you know the one I was telling you so much about. We took a walk in the park, you know the one we used to go to when we were little? We played twenty questions with each other with the exceptions of I couldn't ask about England and he wasn't able to ask about our last name. I wonder why he moved all the way across the country? I told him about you, well not about you but your name, he asked me if I had any siblings and I told him your name. He doesn't like talking about his family or past which you could say he is a lot like me. I hate talking about the past now. Maybe we are more alike than I thought. Although he doesn't believe in love. I wasn't clear on why we doesn't but he told me that love simply doesn't exist. I wish I knew what made him believe that, maybe why he moved from England is correlated with it.

I had him over for dinner and we ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with goldfish and red wine. It was an incredible day, I haven't had a day like that in a long time. A day where I have been completely and utterly happy, I didn't want it to end. I hated to see him leave my apartment but I knew that he had to go. But that's the thing, I didn't want him to go. I wanted to beg him to stay. I wished he would have stayed.

-Rowan

Last weekend had been amazing, there was simply no other words for it. I found myself constantly thinking about Harry no matter what I was doing or what time of day it was. I wanted to be talking to him all the time even though I knew this wasn't possible since we both had our own lives to deal with.

"I feel like we haven't talked in a long time." Elena began when our client left.

"I'm sorry, I've just been a little busy lately." I told Elena putting down my camera.

"With Harry?" Elena winked at me.

"Not like that!" I rolled my eyes at Elena who was looking for a rise out of me. "Obviously you didn't listen to me last time we talked about this."

"Whatever you say Row. You just wait and see." Elena called me by my nickname everyone had called me throughout the years.

"Wait and see what?" I asked her puzzled.

"Rowan, you like Harry more than a friend trust me on this one." Elena explained to me.

"No I don't! All we are is friends." I don't know if I was saying this to convince myself or Elena.

"I know whatever I say to you now won't matter to you but, just wait a little longer and you will see what I see." Elena's bangs were side swept while the rest of her light brown hair hung a little below her shoulders in soft curls.

"How's your relationship with Netflix by the way?" I was quick to change the topic.

"He's got me hooked if you know what I mean." She nudged me and I giggled.

Elena was never one to stay with a guy for very long. Shane made sure of that. When Elena and I were seniors in high school she met Shane at a wild party. Even though half the population at the party was drunk they still kept in contact after it all. They really hit it off, I had never seen Elena so whipped with anyone. She gave everything to Shane until one day he decided he could get something better.  He let her go without warning,  leaving her on the floor with broken pieces of her heart scattered all around her. I had never seen Elena so upset over someone before, it took her a long time to get back to who she used to be.

"You should put yourself out there again." I told Elena who arched an eyebrow and laughed at me.

"I'm serious!" I raised my voice a little nudging her.

"I do put myself out there but, I'm not looking for a relationship right now." I could tell she was making up excuses to cover up what she really felt.

Elena was afraid of rejection. I couldn't blame her after all she did with Shane, she gave Shane everything and got nothing in return. Only left with broken pieces of what was supposed to be her heart. She didn't want to have to commit again because she was afraid they would only let her down in the end, like Shane did before.

"I'm just saying, not every guy is like Shane." I knew it was a sore subject talking or even bringing up Shane's name but she needed to hear it.

She stood with her eyes cast down before replying after a long pause, "I can't go through the same thing. I barely made it through the first time. I can't handle going through that again."

"If he's any kind of a man he won't make you." I rubbed her shoulder hoping that I had made her see that not everyone is like Shane.

As the rest of the day played out I walked home like usual. My phone began to vibrate in my pocket while I jiggled the lock to enter into my apartment. Pressing my phone to my ear I answered with a hello.

"Where have you been?" I could hear my mother voice on the other end.

"What do you mean?" I asked her putting down my bag and headed to my bedroom to slip into something a little more comfortable.

"I haven't heard from you in two weeks! You haven't returned any of my calls." My mother trailed off and I had felt bad that I hadn't called back when she called. I didn't mean to dodge her calls but maybe that's what it looked like to her.

"I'm sorry, I've been meaning to call you back. I've just been super busy with.... things." I didn't want to mention since I knew my mother could be a snoop.

"Well I just wanted to check on you and see how you are. I miss you." I could sense the tone in my mother's voice and I felt bad about not calling back.

"I miss you too, I'm sorry I haven't really been around."

"Why don't you come for dinner?" My mother offered.

Although I would love to spend time with my parents I was run down from work. A glass of wine and an Office marathon sounded more than appealing now that I was stripped into my sweats.

"Tonight?"

"Yes! I'm making breakfast for dinner."

"I don't know I'm kinda tired and it's getting dark out." I leaned against the window watching as the sun would hide behind the landscapes.

"Come on Rowan!" I could tell my mother was disappointed by my response. "Is it because you're with you boyfriend?"

Taken back a rolled my eyes, "No! And he's not my boyfriend!"

It seemed as though no one believed me when I said this. Elena and my mother had never even seen us together yet they automatically assumed we were together. Harry and I were only friends and nothing more, no matter how many times I said it however, Elena didn't buy it.

"Whatever Row. I will leave you to what was his name again?"

"I'm not with him! He's not my boyfriend!"

"Oh that's right, Harry!" Shaking my head we soon hung up with each other. We were only friends. Just friends.

+

After my session with Dr. Hill I made my way to the Hideout excited to see Harry like I always was. Ever since that night that was filled with Elton John records and red wine I felt my bond with Harry became stronger. The night never left my mind and I had wished with all my heart that we could have another just like it.

"When do you get off work?" I asked Harry once I walked up to the counter.

"In an hour, why?" He leaned on his elbows awaiting for my to explain.

"Dinner at my place." I stated simply while my hair curtained over the sides of my face.

"Only if you cut the crust off my sandwich." Harry smiled while I laughed at his reference to the last time we had dinner together.

"Don't pretend like you didn't like it. I know you mom used to put the crust off you sandwiches." I giggled.

"And how do you know that?"

"Because my mom used to do it for my sister and I." He agreed that I was right and gave me my coffee I no longer had to ask for. He already knew what I got and like clockwork I paid and told him I would see him later.

Bustling home to figure out what to make I rummaged through my pantry. Looking through everything little nook and cranny I found two boxes of Kraft macaroni and cheese. I knew that Harry would no doubt make fun of my childish pantry but I looked forward to the playful conversation with him.

Pulling out two wine glasses and a new wine bottle I than went to file through my records I had collected over the years. Smiling at a green one that had a black X across it I took it and relished in the first song. I loved Ed Sheeran and found his music perfect for any occasion.

A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts on my choice of music as I than answered the door seeing Harry glancing down at his phone. Looking up to see me I bit my lip smiling at him seeing that he returned the gesture.

"Hey!" I greeted letting him inside shutting the door behind him.

"Macaroni and cheese?!" His eyes lit up when he saw the finished pot of pasta.

"Yeah! It sounded good and it was all I had in my pantry." I told him honestly.

"I'm beginning to think you're not actually an adult." He cracked a smile while I served him a bowl of the otherwise child meal like the one we had before.

"You're no more of an adult than I am!" I defended serving myself.

"I'm way more of an adult than you!" Harry spooned the pasta into his mouth while I poured the wine into our empty glasses.

Moving everything over to the carpet in the living room where we sat last time I sat across from Harry with my bowl of pasta in my lap. It was all so simple and I wouldn't have had it any other way, we didn't need a fancy dinner to have a good time. We were simply content with each others company.

"Have you ever written a song?" I questioned Harry spooning some more pasta into my mouth.

"Yes, tons." He replied taking a swig of white wine.

"What do you write about?" curiosity struck me and I suddenly wanted to know what kinds of songs Harry wrote.

"Anything that inspires me." Harry answered and I wanted him to show me one of the songs he wrote.

"Love songs?" A smile spread on my face.

"Only a few when I was young. I don't believe in that remember?" A part of me sunk when I remember that small fact about Harry. He didn't believe in love so why would he write about it.

"Let's write a song." I suggested to him.

"About what?" Harry asked while I stood up to grab a paper and pencil to write with.

"How about we write a song about wanting to write a song?" Harry smiled at my idea and I laid on my stomach as did he while we wrote down sentences to a song.

With words covering the page we laughed and talked up until late hours of the morning. The song we had written, well, Harry had written turned out to be actually quiet beautiful. Harry had beautiful thoughts and I couldn't help but fawn over his talent of being a musician.

"What should we call it?" I turned my head to Harry who thought for a few seconds before writing the title on the top of the page.

"I want to write you a song." I spoke reading the letters he had printed above the song we had spent hours coming up with.

"I want to write you a song." He nodded with the dimples appearing with his smile accompanying them.

My eyes felt like heavy weights when the lights of the living room were turned off. The kitchen lights giving off a dimming effect while I laid on Harry's shoulder half asleep while Parks and Rec. played on the t.v.. His body heat keeping me warm as I subconsciously nuzzled myself into him.

Within a short few hours I felt my body lay flat on the couch with the absence of Harry. He must have left but covered me with the blanket that laid over the leather chair next to the couch. Keeping my eyes closed I drifted off again hearing the front door close.

Hey guys! I just have a small announcement! I have a new story out that is both a Harry and Niall fic! I would love for you to check it out and tell me what you think. Also what do you think about Rowan and Harry? Do you think Rorry is possible?;)