Kabanata 34

"Cait, kanta ka naman!"

"Anong kakantahin ko?" Cait said, she was sitting beside Sarathiel. Panay ang tingin niya kay Sath na may tinitipa sa cellphone.

Sath oddly looks relaxed. Ako lang 'yata ang hanggang ngayon ay hindi magawang mapakalma ang puso.

"Wala na bang pag-ibig." Gio suggested. Nabilaukan si Ade na umiinom ng mango shake.

"Gagio," I laughed. "Wala na bang pag-ibig sa puso mo?"

Ngumisi siya saakin. "Ako ba, Zafirah? Baka mali ka ng tinatanungan."

Ngumuso si Cait. She really does look pretty. Hinawi niya ang ilang hibla ng buhok na nagiging sagabal sa kanyang paningin.

"Hindi ko 'yun alam e. Ano pa ba?" Cait asked Gio.

Gio looks up as if he's really thinking. Seryoso siyang bumaling kay Cait.

"Kung ako na lang sana."

Tumikhim si Sarathiel kaya napalingon ako. Kumuha siya ng juice at nilagok ito.

Ngumuso si Cait at umiling. "Hindi ko 'yon kabisado e."

"Ako na lang maga-adjust. Ako na lang kakanta." Boluntaryo ni Gio st kinuha ang mic.

Nagpanggap pa si Gio na nag-gitara."Tayo na lang dalawa! Tayo na lang magsama!"

Tawang-tawa si Ade kay Gio. "Ang senti ng mga kanta mo, gago!"

"Naku, mas matindi pa rin mga kantahan ni Arrisea!" Gio laughed while shaking his head.

Humagikgik si Cait. Inabot niya kay Sath 'yung song book. Tumingin lang sa kanya si Sath.

Sath looks annoyed though. Pinili ko na lang huwag alamin kung bakit. Bakit ayaw niyang masyadong close si Gio kay Cait.

Imposible namang dahil sa akin. Hindi ko alam bakit naiisip ko pa ito. I shook my head in dismay.

"Iscalade, pwede tayo mag-duet?" tanong ni Cait kay Iscalade.

I looked over Iscalade. Agad naman na nanglaki ang mga mata ni Iscalade. Tinuro niya pa ang sarili niya habang nakaawang ang labi.

"Ako?"

Ngayon ko lang napagtantuan na 'yung kausap niyang babae ay si Philomena, she looks different because her hair isn't braided and she isn't wearing her glasses.

Caitlyn blushed and bashfully nodded her head which made me frowned. Bakit naman siya mamumula sa tanong ni Iscalade?

"Anong kanta?" bumaling si Iscalade sa direksyon namin. He was too preoccupied with Philomena.

"Why don't Zafirah choose for us?" ngumiti saakin si Cait. "I wanna get close to her too."

Hindi ko alam bakit iba ang titig saakin ni Cait. If Czanne has a friendly aura, Caitlyn definitely knows how to use her charms well.

Gio bit the inside of his cheeks. He looks at me and rolled his eyes. I decided to go along with it despite of how Gio reacted.

"Go, Zafi." Gio leaned to whisper. Tumawa naman ako sa kanya at tumingin kay Cait.

"Hate That I Love You?" I blurted out. It was a song I used to really bop into and the only duet song I remember as of now.

I don't know why but I can feel Sarathiel staring at me. Uminit ang pisngi ko at medyo bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko, hindi ko alam bakit sa simpling titig ay bumukas na ang kulungan ng mga paru-paru sa tiyan ko.

Tumango si Iscalade at lumapit na para kuhanin 'yung isang mic. "Gusto ko 'yun! Nakaka-relate ako!"

Philomena pouted. She looked at me and gave a small smile. Mukhang ngayon lang din niya ako namukhaan. Of course, I returned the smile. Agad naman siyang yumuko, she really is shy.

Ngumisi si Caitlyn. "Then we'll sing it."

Nilagay nila 'yung numero sa karaoke at nagsimula na itong tumugtog.

They started to sing when the lyrics appeared on the screen. Mala-anghel talaga ang boses ni Cait at malamig naman ang kay Iscalade. I didn't know Iscalade can sing so well. Akala ko puro katarantaduhan lang ang lumalabas sa bibig niya.

I hate how much I love you, boy
But I just can't let you go

Parang may bumara sa lalamunan ko. Nakalimutan ko 'yata ang lyrics ng kanta nung sinabi ko ito. Hindi pa nakakatulong na 'yung ex ko nasa harapan ko lang.

Kukuha sana ako ng juice para matanggal ang pagkatuyo ng lalamunan ko. I felt bolts of electricity when I touch someone's finger. Sabay pala kaming inabot ni Sarathiel 'yung baso.

Nagtaas siya ng kilay saakin. Bumalik na naman siya sa pagiging masungit. Binitawan ko 'yung baso at kinuha 'yung nasa gilid, marami pa namang baso.

Nag-huhumerantado na naman ang puso ko kaya naman pinilit ko itong ikalma gamit ng pag-inom ng juice.

"Restroom lang ako," paalam ko sa kanila. I wanted to take a bathroom break, dahil siguro sa sobrang dami ng juice na ininom ko.

Tumayo ako at lumabas na muna para pumunta ng restroom. It was near our room so I didn't really had to ask for where it is.

Naghuhugas ako ng kamay nang may lumabas sa cubicle na pamilyar sa akin. The same familiar girl made me stiffened on the exact spot.

My eyes widened because it's been a while since I saw her. Hindi naman niya siguro ako aawayin? I mean, she still had a reputation to maintain. Kahit naman nasa labas kami ng school, lumilipad ang balita.

"Czanne?" I called her attention. She turned her head towards me.

Umawang ang bibig niya bago siya tuluyang ngumiti ulit. It's her typical smile.

"Cousins. What about you?" mukhang nabasa niya ang tanong sa isipan ko.

I was about to ask her why she was here. Mukhang meron siyang sinamahan na mga pinsan.

I pointed towards the exit and acted a bit flushed because I didn't expect her to act friendly towards me. Alam ko naman na galit din siya sa akin. I hurted someone important to her.

"Niyaya lang nila Ade," sagot ko. "Nandoon din sila Sath..."

Her smile faded and she rolled her eyes heavenwards. Lumapit siya sa isang sink at naghugas din ng kamay.

"Cait's there, 'no? Kapal niya talaga." Czanne said and it made me frowned at her.

Okay na ba kami dahil si Cait na ang gusto ni Sath? Did her hatred passed on her because of that? That was kind of absurd, kaya ba siya friendly sa akin dahil wala na kami ng taong gusto niya?

"May galit ka ba talaga sa mga nagiging girlfriend ni Sath?" I can't help but ask.

She turns her head to my direction and laughs at me. Agad siyang umiling at binigyan ulit ako ng ngiti.

"You're the only girlfriend of Sath that I acknowledge."

That made my heart fluttered. To hear that once again is heavenly. Pero nasa nakaraan na 'yon. I shouldn't bring it up again.

"That's in the past. She's his present now." Pagtatanggol ko kay Cait. She didn't deserve any hate just because she has what Czanne and I both wanted — Sath's affection.

I didn't want Cait to go through the pain I went to. Mahal ko si Sath, I'd never want to harm someone important to him.

Her eyes turned to slits. "Manhid ka ba? Bobo o tanga? Baka naman all of the above?"

"Excuse me?" I wasn't offended but it was quite shocking because Czanne always keeps her words as mild as possible since she's part of the SSG.

She has an image to maintain.

She sighed exasperatedly.

"I'd prefer a crybaby over a user any day, Zafirah." Pinagpag niya 'yung kamay niya bago tumingin sa salamin para ayusin 'yung ilang hibla ng buhok na nasa mukha niya.

Kumunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niya sa akin. Sinong user? Si Caitlyn? She seemed to be nice. Kahit naman gusto ko si Sath, hindi naman ito dahilan para ayawan ko ang babaing maaaring gusto na niya.

"What do you mean?"

"She's just using Sath who's being gentle towards her and guess why?"

Hindi naman sobrang init pero pinagpapawisan ako.

Kinakabahan ako sa maaaring sabihin ni Czanne. Baka umasa na naman ako. Baka isipin ko na totoong meron pa nga.

"Bakit? Is it because..." I licked my lips.

"Yup. It's because the two of you have some similarities. If that doesn't convince you how crazy Sath is towards you, ewan ko na lang talaga." She got something from her purse and it was a lip balm.

She applied it on her lips. Sinara niya ito at tumingin ulit sa akin. She looked at me with regret. Naramdaman ko ang pagsisisi sa kanyang titig.

"I used to think that I was better for Sath than you." She chuckles then smiled at me with sincerity.

"I'm sorry for everything. This time, no excuses. I'm simply sorry for the things I've done...I know I can't undo it. I'm sorry if I made you doubt your relationship...I was just..." pumikit siya bago nagpatuloy.

"I was in love with Sath and I simply wanted the best for him. Being the narcissist that I was, I though it was me." Para bang may nilunok siyang bato bago niya kunin ang isang kamay ko at may inabot sa palad ko.

"It was clearly you from the start, Zafirah. It has always been you." Tiningnan ko ang inabot niya sa akin. It made my eyes welled up with tears.

It was the bracelet with the stethoscope.

"I got it from Sath when he was so devastated that he threw it in the field. Pero parang tanga lang dahil hinanap niya kaagad ito kinabukasan. I thought that if I hide it, he'll just give up." She said, reminiscing a certain event.

"Yet he bought an exact copy but with a different pendant, it was a calculator."

Even if it was blurry in my memory, I think I saw the bracelet she was referring to.

"I'm apologizing because clearly I've done you wrong. You have all the right to hate me. Pero sana bigyan mo si Sath ng pagkakataon ulit. Sath means a lot to me," she muttered each word precisely. "This time, he only means a lot to me as a friend."

"He already has someone else, the least that I can do —" she cut me off. Agad niyang binuksan ang tubig sa lababo upang lumikha ng ingay. Tumigil naman ako at tumingin sa kanya. She closed the faucet once again.

"Caitlyn isn't in love with Sath. She's trying to use him to get closer to someone..."

I furrowed my eyebrows because of that. Sino naman? And why would Sath let her do that?

"Sino?"

"I don't know? I don't care about that girl." She sneered and fixed her hair once again.

She clearly despises her. Ano kayang ginawa ni Caitlyn para kainisan siya ni Czanne nang ganito?

Tumingin ako sa hawak kong bracelet. I tried supressing the memories but I fail every time. Siguro hindi talaga posibleng makalimutan ko si Sath. The only way for us to both move on is for me to accept the past and do things in the present to have something in the future.

"Do you think Sath is willing to give it another try?"

Umangat ang tingin ko sa kanya.

Czanne smiled at me with utmost sincerity.

"It's for the both of you to find out."

As soon as I got out of the restroom. I saw Sath walking towards a certain direction, kaagad ko siyang hinabol at hinawakan sa pulso.

I always wonder about the past not seeing that I have the present to change the future.

The chance of changing my future lies here right now. Buong tapang kong pinigilan si Sath na umalis.

I saw how Sath was taken aback. Nakita ko rin kung paano niya pinilit maging kalmado.

"Yes?" his voice was hoarse as if he was trying to tame his breathing.

I gave him a small smile.

I intertwined my fingers into his. Nakita ko kung paano natigilan si Sath. I still have the effect on you, huh? Lalo lamang umaalon ang pagasa sa puso ko.

"I'm r-ready to open up now," my lips were quivering. "Can you listen t-to me being honest with y-you?"

Pumungay ang kanyang mga mata.

In a small voice, he answered me.

"I thought you'll never ask."

❛ ━━━━━━･❪✎❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜