Kabanata 14

"Gio, huwag kang maingay!"

Gusto kong burahin ang ngisi sa mukha ni Gio. Kanina ko pa siya hinahabol kasi parang tanga lang pupunta ba naman siya sa STEM building.

"Anong gagawin mo kasi sa STEM building?!" Hinihingal na tanong ko. Bakit kasi ang haba rin ng legs nitong lalaki na 'to?

Madrama siyang pumikit. "Papasyal lang. Magu-unwind. Hahanapin ang sarili."

"Gagio ka talaga! Ano nga?!"

"Tatanong ka pa! Syempre pagkakalat kong crush mo si Sarathiel!"

"Huwag kasi!" Para akong batang nagmamaktol dahil sa sinabi niya.

Magmula nang marinig niya akong umamin kay Clary. Atat na atat na siyang magsumbong kay Sarathiel. Nakakainis lang kasi ayaw niya talaga ako tantanan!

Nakakahiya kaya umamin! I mean, kaya ko naman pero di ngayon! May field demo pa kami. Ayokong ma-distract dahil balak ko talagang manalo ang ABM.

Sakto naman na nakita ko si Sarathiel na naglalakad habang kausap si Czanne. Nanglalaki ang mga mata ko dahil ayaw kong magkasalubong sila ni Gio.

"Gio, tara na kasi!" Nahawakan ko na si Gio sa balikat at pilit siyang hinahatak pabalik sa building namin.

Namumula na ako sa sobrang inis. Si Gio kasi mukhang tuwang-tuwa pa.

"Sarathiel, my love!" Sigaw ba naman ni Gagio!

Napalingon tuloy sa amin si Sarathiel na nakakunot ang noo. He was examining the both of us.

I gritted my teeth in frustration. I was about to turn around and run when Sarathiel called for me.

"Zafi," unti-unti siyang lumapit sa amin. Gio was smiling from ear to ear.

"Dude! Alam mo ba may crush—" tinakpan ko ang bibig ni Gio.

"Sa'yo si Gio!" dugtong ko sa naudlot niyang sasabihin.

Gulat na gulat ang ekspresyon ni Gio. Napahawak pa siya sa dibdib niya. Akala mo naman talaga!

"Thanks?" Sarathiel looked confused. He immediately turned his attention to me.

"Did you eat lunch? Sabay na tayo?"

"H-ha?" nauutal kong sabi.

"Will you stay at school? Baka raw may meeting ang heads for props." He said, shrugging.

"Ah sige. Oo. Sabay na tayo kumain. Balik lang ako sa room."

"Samahan na kita?" Sarathiel offered.

"Ampucha, hatid-sundo naman pala." Halakhak ni Gio. Siniko ko nga para manahimik.

Sinamahan ako ni Sarathiel sa building namin. Halos lahat 'yata nang makasalubong namin ay napapalingon sa kanya. Some even tried avoiding to glance at him but he still gets their attention.

Ang weird naman kasi talaga na may STEM sa ABM building.

Kinuha ko ang baunan ko saka bumaba na ulit kami ni Sath papunta sa Main Caf. Nakita ko na nandoon din si Iscalade kasama ang ilan pa sa mga kaibigan nila.

Nang makita kami ni Iscalade, agad siyang kumaway sa'min.

"Sarathiel! Zafirah! Dito tayo!" Yaya niya sa aming dalawa ni Sath.

Tiningnan ko si Sath pero umiling-iling siya. He looks pissed off as his friend strides his way towards us.

"Bakit? Niyayaya tayo nila Iscalade roon oh," turo ko pa sa direksyon nila Iscalade. Patuloy itong kumakaway sa amin.

Ngumuso siya. "We were supposed to eat together."

"We'll still eat together. Kasama lang sila," I laughed. I heard him cussed under his breath but we eventually went to Iscalade's table.

Umupo ako sa tabi ni Sarathiel na katabi ngayon ang lalaking naka-headphones. Sa tabi ni Iscalade ay may dalawang lalaki na nag-uusap.

"Ikaw si friendly guy! Cae, right?" I tried to to form a small talk.

"Hi. Zafirah, if I'm not wrong?" he said, as if trying to remember who I was.

"Yes, that's me." I smiled.

Tumingin sa'min si Iscalade, nagpalipat-lipat ang mata niya sa akin pati kay Cae. He whistled before asking.

"Magkakilala kayo?"

"Hindi naman." I answered before taking a bite of my food.

"Good, baka may magselos." Halakhak ni Iscalade. Binatuhan siya ni Sarathiel ng tissue sa mukha.

"This is Sachael and Ade by the way." Pakilala niya sa dalawa niyang kasama na bago sa paningin ko.

Sachael was the one beside Sarathiel. Si Ade naman 'yung isa pang katabi ni Iscalade. Hindi ba sila 'yung mukhang mga model nung first day?

"Ade is ABM too, Zafi. Baka nagkikita tayo?"

I looked at Ade. "ABM ka?"

"ABM 2 po. Nakikita kita sa corridor ng ABM, palagi kang nagr-review." Tumawa nang mahina si Ade.

"Ah yeah, araw-araw kasi may surprise recitation kami sa E-Tech."

I'm studious. Hindi ako sanay na walang review, kahit pa alam ko namang gets ko 'yung topic — hindi ako pumapasok ng walang alam.

"Ganyan ba talaga kapag galing section 1? Sobrang talino?"

"Hindi ah. Masisipag lang talaga sa pag-aaral." I denied.

"Si Sarathiel din naman, ah. Section 1 pero di number 1 sa puso ng crush niya," hagalpak ang tawa ni Iscalade.

Natigilan ako.

May crush si Sarathiel?

"Sino crush mo?" I straight forwardly asked. Nabilaukan si Sarathiel sa iniinom niyang softdrink.

"Awkward!" Iscalade was wiping the tears from his eyes. Naiiyak na siya kakatawa.

"Mga katanungan bago mangyari ang sakuna," Ade chuckled.

Cae was hiding a smile and Sachael was grinning.

It is Czanne? Philomena? Sino?

Ako?

Hindi sumagot si Sarathiel. His lips were parted and he kept avoiding my gaze.

"I mean, it's your privacy. Huwag mo na lang pala sabihin." I smiled before putting the lid back on my tupperware.

Tumayo na ako saka umalis.

I was shaking.

I didn't know how to react to that. Ang alam ko lang ang sakit pala talaga kapag may gustong iba ang gusto mo.

I shouldn't feel this way. Wala naman akong karapatan. It is not like we have mutual feelings. I know my limits.

Ayoko naman umasa. I always remind myself that I'm better off alone than hurt. Kung aasa ako na baka ako 'yon pero hindi naman — I probably can't study for our periodical test. Ayoko naman ng ganun. Ninety over landi.

I should set aside my feelings for Sarathiel. If I wanted ABM to win the upcoming field demonstration of UJD, I should plan ahead.

Ako naman na ang napili bilang head of props. I really did my best in designing my notebooks, projects and etchetera to make my Adviser impressed. She recommended me to the ABM coordinator and it took a day for them to tell me that I was picked as the head of props.

Ilang araw rin na hindi kami nagkita ni Sarathiel. When we were called to have a meeting for the field demo, nagkaroon kami ng pagkakataon na magkita muli.

He had his arms crossed while peeking over me. Ako naman ay nanatiling hindi umiimik sa kanya. Nakita ko ang bahagyang pagkunot ng noo niya.

Nagkaroon ng meeting sa Main Lib kaming mga head of props. Si Icarus ng HUMSS, si Tabitha ng GAS, si Suzette ng TVL at si Sarathiel ng STEM.

The SHS department coordinator briefly explained our responsibilities as head of props.

Bawal kaming gumawa ng props kapag hindi oras ng paggawa. Ibibigay naman daw 'yung time para sa roon. Disqualified daw kapag nanira kami ng props ng ibang strand. We should also refrain from pointing fingers on who owned the design of the props first.

I was writing in my notes when Sarathiel gently pulled my ponytail.

"Galit ka?" he asked, soft spoken. Nakiliti naman ako sa paraan ng pagsasalita niya.

He smells like mint. Naaamoy ko siya ngayon dahil malapit siya saakin. He always had this fragrance with him.

Honestly, it is unfair how fragrance works on men. Bukod sa long lasting ito ay ang lakas talaga makahatak sa pangamoy. But maybe it is just because I find him attractive that's why even his smell makes my heart feel hammered.

I decided to shook my head and gaze back at him. Kitang-kita ko ang kulay kayumanggi niyang mga mata. His brown eyes can easily make my knees weak.

I gulped and returned my focus on my notes. Nagsulat ako kahit wala naman nang pinaguusapan.

"Hindi, I'm busy. Alam mo na, gusto ko lang naman manigurado na kami ang panalo." I pursed my lips.

He was about to speak when he decided not to. He bit his lower lip and nodded. Umalis na siya dahil tapos naman na 'yung meeting.

Sinundan ko lamang siya ng tingin. I wonder if he notice how much his mere presence can make me feel like this.

I was determined to win this time. I was always competitive when it comes to school. Gusto ko talagang manalo.

There's this part of me that always aim to be the best. Naniniwala kasi ako na kung kaya ko naman gawin ang best ko, bakit ako mags-settle for less?

Ang foundation ng UJD ay sa January. It's already December now and the first two weeks of January is allocated for the preparation of the field demo. Grade 11 lang ang event na ito dahil ang mga grade 12 ay dapat daw nage-enjoy ng foundation day dahil huling taon na nila sa SHS.

Medyo malayo pa pero inisip ko na agad ang mga maaaring gagawin ko para rito. Plan ahead, they say. It always works with me.

『••✎••』

"Lapit na Christmas break ah," Bea said while looking at me.

"Yeah." I slowly nodded my head as I was scribbling some design for the backdraft of ABM.

Ang theme ng foundation namin ay ang strand namin mismo. So we'll be performing a field demo that promotes each and every strands. I heard TVL will soon have more strands, bukod sa culinary. Handa ang UJD sa facilities para sa senior highschool pero mukhang nangangapa rin sila pagdating sa mismong panibagong curriculum.

We were currently having our class in principles of marketing, groupwork ito kaya naman umupo si Melay sa aking tabi. I was taking down notes for the potential feasibility study that we'll have to do for this subject.

"Ang lamig naman ng Pasko natin, girl. Away kayo ni Sarathiel?" tanong ni Melay.

I shook my head. Pero sa kaloob-looban ay binabangabag ako ng sinabi ni Melay.

Hindi ko alam kung anong nakain ni Sarathiel dahil halata namang iniiwasan niya ako.

Well, I saw him before but he decided to walk the opposite direction. Awtomatikong napikon ako sa nagawa niya pero ayoko naman i-chat siya dahil lang doon.

Did he notice I have a crush on him? Did someone tell him?

I don't know.

Ang babaw niya kung lalayuan niya ako dahil crush ko siya. Hindi ko naman ipagpipilitan 'yung feelings ko sa kanya.

Pero meron naman itong magandang dulot sa akin. Iniiwasan niya ako kaya naman mas nagkakaroon ako ng oras para sa sarili ko. Not thinking about him or anything else but my plans for the field demo.

This was also a good thing because I have more time to focus on the field demo. Seryoso talaga ako rito.

I thought he'll act like that until God knows when — pero nagulat ako dahil may nadatnan ako sa aking desk nang pumasok ako.

I thought he didn't care...

Until one day, a pack of yakult was found on my desk with a sticky note.

Kinuha ko ang sticky note at binasa ito. The handwriting was as neat as always. It opened the cage of butterflies in my stomach. Sobrang liit lang ng note na ito pero iba sa pakiramdam.

Hi Zafi, my blockmates forbids me from meeting you 'cause they're scared that I'll intentionally let our strand lose because of you.

Have some Yakult. So everyday, you'll be okay. Without me. For now.

I hope this field demo ends now because seriously I just want to tell you something.

Sincerely,
Sath

I giggled as I decided to keep the note and the yakult. Nakita ko ang ilan sa mga kaklase ko na nakatingin sa akin. I ignored them and went to my seat.

Kagagaling lang ni Melay sa cafeteria kaya nang makita niya ako ay agad na umawang ang labi niya.

"Kanino galing?" Melay asked upon seeing me drinking a yakult. Inabutan ko naman siya nito dahil hindi rin naman maganda kung uubusin ko ang isang pack sa isang araw.

"Sath," I answered. "Hindi raw siya pinapayagan na makita ako."

"Bakit naman?"

"Takot daw matalo ang mga STEM," I shrugged off and decided to throw the bottle of yakult in the near trashbin.

"Crush ka rin ba ni Sath?"

Kumunot ang noo ko at umiling sa kanya. I went back to my seat beside hers.

"No?"

"Hmm, feeling ko crush ka rin niya." Pumalumbaba siya at ngumisi sa akin. "Sobrang effort naman niya kung sakaling hindi ka niya crush pero gumagawa siya nang paraan para makapagusap kayo."

"Silly, it's Sath..." I wanted to rebuke her but then I realized...

Lalo lamang lumawak ang ngisi ni Melay at pumalakpak pa siya.

"Exactly, Sath rarely inserts effort. Pero sa'yo, sobrang effort."

My eyes squinted. Ghad. Namumula na 'yata ako ngayon. I could feel the anticipation in my heart. Baka nga, baka sakaling crush niya rin ako.

Pero, I'll still beat them in the upcoming field demo. Ngumisi ako. That's right, I'm not backing down just because of my feelings.

Ninety over landi.

❛ ━━━━━━･❪✎❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜