wonders won't ever cease this mystery of us

"I really like this," Gray said, holding the fuzzy blanket tighter around herself as she sat on the bed in Elis's room. She arrived to the lake house before the storm hit, and was supposed to get back to Aunt Lauren's soon, but couldn't quite leave with the pouring rain outside.

"The rain?" Elis asked. "I think me too."

"It's chaotic, but peaceful. It can cause a lot of destruction, but it's also a serene thing to watch."

That was some of Elis's favorite parts about Gray, when the ginger girl talked about random things with as much knowledge and passion. It made Elis's stomach flip when she thought of the amount of feelings she felt for the ginger girl.

"I want us to go back to the hills on one of the days. I kind of liked it there," Elis said, lifting her cigarette to her lips before she took a long drag. "It's also my excuse of spending more time with you since you've proved to be capable of disappearing for like... A week."

"I can only come here with Aunt Lauren's permission," Gray said. "She doesn't really let me go places that much, especially without her."

"Really?" Elis frowned.

"Yeah," the smaller girl nodded. "She's overprotective. It stems from the fact that my own mother died so she feels like she should protect me to the best of her abilities. But I got used to her that it doesn't bother me a lot. I don't have a lot of friends to visit anyway."

Elis didn't mean to be selfish, but the fact that Gray wasn't always around whenever she felt like holding her, or simply just being with her, bothered her a lot.

"I miss you. Whenever you're not here."

Gray's heartbeat escalated, and so did her temperature when she felt her cheeks warming up. "Me too. But I come here whenever I can."

"I know that," Elis smiled, reaching out to hold Gray's hand as she took another drag of her smoke and held the ginger girl's gaze.

"I was also on bed rest. I horrible pains in my stomach this week. It's from something I ate that I didn't know I was allergic to."

The fact that Elis didn't and couldn't know when Gray was sick was a lot for her to handle, and with the knowledge that Elis couldn't reach her through a personal cellphone, she grabbed a pen and a piece of paper from the bedside counter and scribbled down her number.

"You should call me," Elis said, folding the small paper and holding it towards Gray. "With your landline."

"I will," Gray grinned when she took the small paper and safely tucked it in her jacket. "Can't believe I never thought of that before."

"Well from now on," Elis put the remainder of the cigarette off, placing it on the counter and leaning over to Gray. "I'm only one call away."

It was when Gray smiled to reveal her perfectly lined teeth that Elis kissed her, Gray tasting the smoke from the taller girl's mouth.

"You taste like Marlboro's."

Elis grinned in the kiss. "You taste like sweet honey."

"I hate honey," Gray articulated. Elis smiled.

"Me too."

But she loved everything else the ginger girl was.

Everything Gray could offer, Elis would always be in desperate need of it. And even when a few hours passed, when their positions had changed and a few gentle kisses led to heavy make outs, the rain was still pouring, and Elis still found herself higher in the intoxicated drug Gray served as.

So both girls lied on the bed with Gray's head on Elis's chest and her arm over the ginger girl who softly told her some of her favorite Shakespearean quotes from the top of her head. Elis didn't even bother to ask what each meant, as she closed her eyes in content and listened on the voice of Gray that occasionally changed tones but remained small and calm, and it was untimely Gray that allayed Elis.

But it was in the middle of the peaceful atmosphere that the ginger girl squeezed her eyes shut, a hiss following the sudden pain she just felt in her stomach. They were pains unlike Gray has ever experienced before, making Gray wonder of exactly which food it was that caused the allergy.

"Are you okay?" Elis asked, but already knowing she wasn't when she opened her eyes and saw the ginger girl's face contorted in unbelievable pain.

"Yeah," Gray breathed, failing to get all of her voice out. "It's the allergy. I'll be okay."

"You sure?" Elis worriedly interjected, holding Gray close and wondering in which way she could make her feel better. "You said it has been going on for a week."

"I know I'll be... Wait-- I," the smaller girl's voice came out in the form of short gasps.

"What? What is it?" Elis pulled away to look at a barely moving Gray.

"I feel... I don't know what it is. Something's happening."

"What do you mean? What are you talking about?"

"Elis I don't know what's happening," Gray's eyes widened as she acknowledged the unfamiliar feeling between her legs. Elis stood up, walking over to Gray's side of the bed and kneeling down next to her. Gray had her knees pressed together, the pain of her face replaced by uncomfortableness.

"Gray you're scaring me," Elis said. "Tell me what you're feeling like."

"I don't know," Gray countered. And her eyes were wide in shock when she reached between her legs and brought her hand back up to see her fingers covered in redness.

Elis looked with realization. "Are you having your period?" She asked, further examining the ginger girl's terrified face that everything made even more sense. "Are you having your first period?"

The words pulsated into Gray like the rush of a train smashing into her. "What?"

"You've never had a period before?" Elis softly asked, and Gray shook her head.

"Come here," Elis said, gently trying to help Gray off the bed, but the shorter girl was resistant. Her eyes became glossy with tears as she began to fathom what was happening to her.

"Gray..." Elis trailed off, kneeling down on the side of the bed again. "It's okay. Nothing's wrong. I promise."

Gray slowly darted her eyes over to Elis's, which had a reassuring look.

"Really?" Gray sighed, hating that all of this was happening to her. "Yes," Elis affirmed. You're gonna be fine. Now come here."

"I can't," Gray contradicted.

"You're gonna have to at some point."

"What if... It's all over your bed? And I hate that it's all over me."

"I couldn't care less about the sheets, Gray. And if you're uncomfortable then I promise I won't look once you stand up."

And even through her most uncomfortable life experience yet, the curly haired girl still made Gray's heart jump.

"Okay. Just... close your eyes."

"I wanna help you up," Elis said, reaching over to Gray but the ginger girl swatted her hands away.

"I'll do it by myself."

"Okay." Elis smiled, raising her hands up to surrender. "I should warn you though, periods sometimes come with moody behaviors. And I'm a very tolerating person so I'll aways kiss you even if you swat my hands away."

The curly haired girl leaned in to leave a small kiss on Gray's lips, and the ginger girl wanted Elis to do that for as long as possible. But she audibly exhaled, getting off the bed and Elis helping her to the bathroom, without looking at her like she promised.

"Which between the two do you think you'll like better?" Elis asked as soon as they got to the bathroom, holding a box of tampons in one hand and a packet of pads in the other. "There are other options to use but these are the only ones I have."

"I'll take the pads. I feel like the tampons will make me uncomfortable."

"Same. I barely use them," Elis countered, and Gray smiled, and just like that feeling like she wasn't alone and there was someone in front of her who she insanely loved and who understood just what she was going through.

"I'll get some clothes for you, and you can give me yours to put in the wash," Elis said, and Gray nodded as the curly haired girl walked out of the bathroom to her closet, where she found some clean clothes as well as a new pair of underwear.

And after returning to the bathroom and kissing Gray one more time before closing the door, Elis lied on the bed, acknowledging that the sheets were unstained. Her hands were placed behind her head as she listened to the calming rain until Gray emerged from the bathroom. She was wearing the clothes Elis had given her, holding her folded ones in her arms.

Elis walked over to the ginger girl, taking the clothes from her and leading her to the bed like the shorter girl would fall down the longer she stood. "Lie down. I'll be back," she kissed Gray's forehead before disappearing out the room.

The curly haired girl came back after putting Gray's clothes in the wash and they listened to the rest of the calming rain with the ginger girl lying in her arms.

And just like that, Elis was claiming more of Gray's firsts.

It hadn't just been her who was the first person Gray kissed, loved and shared her most sensual experiences with. But Elis was the first person to ignite a carefree fire in Gray, the first person the ginger girl ever got drunk with, the first person Gray wanted to hold close and even the person to be there when Gray had her first period. And what else would need to happen for Gray to only want to be with Elis for the rest of their lives? She didn't wish to live a life that Elis was not a part of, that their love wasn't a part of. And it was what Gray processed in her mind as she fell asleep in Elis's arms, as the curly haired girl held her close for the duration of the summer rain.

And it was Elis who Gray was most happy with... with whom she ever wanted to be.