Seven years weren't enough for a lot of students to keep their school period apart from crushes, secret none-real relationships and other kinds of young love. These students were reckless, often popular kids who would skip classes to go snogging in their dorms. They didn't care about breakups, didn't think about futures and didn't want to.

I was exactly the same, except for the fact I was also the opposite of it. Allow me to explain.

Indeed I had a crush, and believe me, it wasn't a small one. That was problem number one; this thing had gotten way too big to just simply ignore. Second problem, I wasn't the only one who liked that boy. For you see, that one particular boy was a certain mister Draco Malfoy.

But, comparing myself to all them other girls out there, I had something they didn't have. And that one thing made it possible for me to go up to him and tell him all, if I had the power to be like the others and laugh through my nerves, something which I'd never been good at.

Right now, you're probably wondering what makes me so special, hm? Let me tell you. The thing all those other girls didn't have, was a history. And not just one. No, this history included me and Draco. Together. In a secret none-real relationship. It went so well, with sneaking kisses and secret hidings. So well... until our sixth year.

'You don't know!' he'd screamed at me. We were down in the dungeons, in our Slytherin dorms. Hot tears burned in my eyes, while he paced up and down in front of me and yelled so many reasons why we suddenly had to stop all of this. I shouted I couldn't stop, to which he said I had to leave. 'But I can't,' I whispered, letting tears go their ways over my cheeks. 'Can't you see it? I can't, Draco!' 'You have to,' he groaned. He stopped and faced me, looking right into my wet eyes. 'Please. Just... just promise me you'll stay away from me. You don't know how hard this is for me... maybe, someday, we can get back. Start it all over, from where we began. Please...'

The last thing I remembered, was the closing of my eyes as my hands wiped away the salty water from my cheeks and chin. Next moment, Draco had left. And so did my love for him.

But this was the seventh year and my love had regained its strength, even though things were more dangerous than ever – and not even between me and Draco. Since Sir Voldy Moldy came back from his defeat, every year had been more painful. My parents even considered getting me home, until the moment my father was sent to Azkaban and my mother stopped replying to my letters. Having Blaise saying she might have a mental breakdown, didn't really calm down my nerves.

But, nerves or not, I stood here. Right in front of Draco's door. And my heart only started racing as his voice asked me through the wood to come in.

Would he want the same as I did? Or maybe he didn't... Would he still love me? Did he ever love me? So many questions, and I shook them all off as I stepped into the room.

I was surprised to see him standing in front of me, only with his back turned to me. His head hung down, I could see that, and I could hear a soft sigh coming from his mouth. After I closed the door, his head shot up and his hand travelled to his hair to mess it up, possibly accidently.

'Y/n...'

It sent shivers all the way from my toes up to my spine, further to my cheeks as I felt them lit up with blush. Draco sighed again, then turned around and looked at me.

My heart gained wings as I saw him, just exactly the same as I remembered him. Automatically, I let my head hang down, just far enough to still look at him from the corners of my eyes. 'Draco,' I mumbled.

'You shouldn't have come.' His voice was hard, but the look in his eyes was harder as I looked back at him. Even though my mind knew it was a clear mask, it hurt and I carefully took a step closer to him. 'Draco, please –' 'Y/n, we both know why this ended,' Draco stated and stepped backwards while I came closer. I tried to shrug as I kept on slowly walking up to him, my eyes still on his face. 'Yeah. So? We can go on again...' 'We can't,' he groaned and turned around again.

'I've changed. You don't know me, even if you think you do.' 'That's the problem,' I said, 'because I don't think so. I know I know you, and don't you say I don't know you! Draco, please. Don't you remember how it was?'

'Of course I do,' he said, turning back again, this time ignoring my glance as he started his familiar pace. 'But we can't have that again, it just can't...' He sighed and placed his hands on his head. '... it's impossible.'

'No, it's not.' I closely followed Draco's movements and decided this was my turn to tell him we weren't over yet. 'Draco, please. I love you. I know you love me too. He might keep you from loving me, but I know you're better. You can put yourself through this. I will help you, together we can do this. Please Draco, listen to me. Our love is way stronger than this war. Can't we restart from where we left off?'

It remained quiet for a long time. Draco didn't move and I almost started to get scared I'd accidently hexed him. Maybe my words were just too much of a shock for him?

But he proved other as his hands went back to his sides and he turned to me again, his head down and his hands clenched into fists.

'I'm sorry, I just...' He looked up, and for the first time in a long time, tears filled up his grey eyes. 'You don't know how hard it is to live with regrets.' 'Yes,' I said, quiet but hard enough. 'Yes, I do Draco... I have a huge regret about something I never should have done...' His wet eyes already carried the question in them before I had spoken the answer, and I could see the curiosity in every tear that was now dripping over his pale skin. I slowly stepped towards him and grabbed his hands. Draco looked down for a moment, but as he turned his gaze back to me the same question was still burning. A small smile spread over my face. 'Letting you go,' I whispered, and closed my eyes as I leaned in to kiss him.

An action that was rudely interrupted by the breaking contact of our hands.

Surprised, my gaze opened up and found him at the other side of the room, with his hands in his hair. His face was everything except positive for me; he clearly wasn't angry or mad, he just seemed upset, confused and even a bit sad.

'D-Don't.'

That one word had the power to make me lose my hope. All of my hope. Everything became a blur as I stumbled to his bed, trying to get a hold of something before I fell on the floor. 'But –'

'Y/n, no. J-Just...' A tear mixed through his voice. He spoke softly as he kept walking away from me. '...don't.' My brain was racing with probably something like the speed of light. 'W-Why?' I stuttered, although it must've sounded more like a whine than a question.

'Y-You don't understand!' he yelled, still crying with many tears. 'Can't you s-see? I care too much about you to let you be captured by my love! If it happens, he will surely find out. A-And I can't let that happen, I can't and I won't...'

I sank into a chair. Everything in front of me was still blurry and unclear and tears still streamed down my face, until I felt a cold hand on mine. 'I'm sorry,' his raspy voice said, 'I'm so sorry. I'm just – I love you too much to – I-I...'

'I understand,' I whispered. My feet could feel the ground again and I stood up, shaking his hands off and carefully made my way to the door. 'I fully understand,' I repeated, even though it was the opposite of my thoughts right now. My ice-cold hands found the knob and I was about to open the door, when his voice stopped me yet again.

'Y/n... you have to know, once he isn't my leader any more, I will come back to you. We will be together then... I just don't want him to do anything to you as he finds out.'

It was silent for a moment. Then he said the last thing I'd hear from his mouth for a long, long time.

'I love you, Y/n.'

'I love you too, Draco,' I whispered, and after that I opened the door and walked away. If only I didn't live with regrets... things would be so much easier, especially if they included the little case between me and the blonde-haired boy.