"How was the session?" Hiccup asked me as he stood up from the chair in which he had been sat in the waiting room, my leather jacket draped over his forearm.

I shrugged, my entire being feeling completely ... empty. "It was alright, I guess."

Hiccup walked over to me and placed his hands on either side of my face. His eyes met mine for a second before he pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. "I'm so proud of you for agreeing to do this, Astrid."

Sorrow rippled through me at his words, reminding me of all that I had lost those 2 months prior. 2 months prior I had lost everything I held dear, my mother, my father and my home. The only thing I had been left with was a house burnt to the ground, a dirty prom dress and fortunately my bird who had somehow managed to escape from the house before it turned to ashes.

That night I had been sobbing in Hiccup's arms for far longer than I had originally thought. I couldn't remember much of it though, seeing as after I saw my parents ... my mind just shut down completely. According to Hiccup, the EMTs had rushed over to me and tried to comfort me, but I was inconsolable.

The firemen eventually managed to put out the fire, but by that point my home had already been burnt to a crisp. After they finished, the police tried to question us, but Hiccup did most of the answering seeing as I was ... not myself. Somehow, later that evening, I ended up back in Hiccup's guest bedroom where I had ended up sleeping for two consecutive days.

Just because I slept for two days straight didn't mean I wasn't absolutely exhausted when I woke up. My chest felt like it had been dissolved by acid and my eyes were still swollen and red from when I had wailed the two nights before or from when I had supposedly cried in my sleep. I remember having tucked my blanket tighter around myself as I just stared and stared blankly into the wall, my thoughts getting the best of me.

Hiccup and Stoick had stopped by quite often. Either to get me to eat or to have a chat with me. Those talks were usually very one-sided seeing as I could barely bring myself to even open my mouth.

I had completely lost my appetite, I was always tired and absolutely drained of energy and I wanted nothing more than to just close my eyes and never have to open them again.

The first time I had gone out of my house since the incident was the funeral. Stoick, Hiccup and Gobber had planned it with some help from my other friends, seeing as I was incapable of even thinking about my parents without completely shattering. That morning Heather and Ruffnut had walked into my room all dressed up in black with forced, sad smiles on their faces as they placed something on my bed.

They had attempted to speak to me, but I wasn't in the mood. It was clear that my friends were worried about me, but I couldn't find the energy to care. Everything hurt and I couldn't bear to hide it any longer. I had barely even noticed when the two girls had helped me up and out of bed, dragged me over to the bathroom and given me a very much needed shower. Afterwards, they had dressed me in a black, knee-length, spaghetti strap dress. Heather handed me a leather jacket.

"We know it's not the one you lost, but we thought ... we thought maybe you'd like a piece of your old self?" Heather suggested as she carefully put it on me. I didn't even bother to answer her.

"Did you forget my size?" I asked my friends quietly, gazing down at the loose-fitting dress and jacket that rested upon my body.

Heather and Ruffnut exchanged a look, their brows furrowed. "Astrid, sweetie, when was the last time you ate something?"

I blinked as I tried to remember when the last time I had actually eaten was. Flashes of me barely picking at my food flooded my mind as I watched myself slowly push away the plate on the bedside table. My gaze moved down to my slightly smaller form. I hadn't eaten a full meal since ... prom.

I simply shook my head in response before it was time to go to the funeral. I didn't say or do much during the whole ordeal, quite frankly, I didn't feel as if I was really there. The church Gobber had chosen for the funeral was packed to the brim with people and after the priest had finished with whatever piss he was saying, several of them came up to say a few words. I didn't hear a single one of them.

The only part of the funeral I really remembered was when I had gone up to both of the caskets, placed my hands on them and whispered 'I love you' to whatever was left of the people who had given me life. As they were lowered into the earth — right next to each other — Hiccup wrapped a hand around my shoulders, as if he was reassuring me that he would never leave me.

Then came the same routine once again. Once I climbed into bed, it was going to take a lot to get me out. My weight rapidly decreased and I was looking more and more like a shell of my former self every day. Fortunately for me, Berk High took pity on me and allowed me to skip my last exams due to my excellent grades and GPA the past semester.

My last week in High School was spent curled up in bed and not with my friends and classmates as it was supposed to. It made me feel like shit, so I decided that I was not going to miss out on graduation.

Hiccup and my friends were over the moon. Heather and Ruffnut had come to Hiccup's house to get ready and it was ... nice to feel kind of normal again, even though I knew it would never be the same as it had been before I lost everything.

We eventually made it to the stage, were handed our diplomas and celebrated by throwing our hats into the air. As my friends and classmates all began discussing the subject of college and universities, I found myself glancing over at Stoick Haddock, who looked just as proud to have seen me walk the stage as he had been when Hiccup had done the same.

I left my friends and Hiccup to chat with each other and went to sit down beside Stoick. I grabbed his hand, a forced smile pulling at my lips. "Thank you, for everything."

A sad smile pulled at his features. "It was nothing, lass. Nothing at all. Your folks were good friends of mine and I could never, ever let someone I consider family sit out on the streets."

I raised a brow, my eyes burning at his words. "Y-you consider me ... family?"

Family. It was such an odd word to me now. I had no family anymore, I was an orphan, all alone in this cruel world with no one to care for me.

"Aye, lass. You're like a daughter to me and someday ... " Stoick nodded towards Hiccup, who looked to be laughing with his friends. I couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corners of my lips.  "I'm hoping that muttonhead over there gets his shit together and asks you to marry him."

My eyes widened at the thought, but surprisingly enough it didn't ... seem so bad. I couldn't help but turn my gaze towards Hiccup and as my eyes went up to meet his, he turned towards me, that beautiful lopsided grin of his plastered on his face. My cheeks flushed red. "You really think he wants to ... marry me?"

Stoick snorted. "He better, especially considering how much he talks about you and how much he says he loves you and that he would do absolutely anything for you."

I blinked. "He ... he said that?"

Stoick nodded. "Aye. I know one thing for certain, lass, and one thing only; that boy is crazy for you and he will never stop loving you. You should consider yourself lucky."

Tears welled in my eyes as I once again found myself looking at Hiccup, who had gone back to chatting with his other friends, "Believe me, I really really do."

After the ceremony, we had all gone out to eat as a group: parents and all. I felt quite lonely sitting at that table with my friends and their families, especially knowing I didn't have one. I turned my gaze down to my plate and suddenly a strong hand wrapped around my own. I glanced up and found Stoick giving me a warm smile as he mouthed what I believed to be: 'We're your family'

In the middle of the meal, I excused myself to the toilet, but instead of going there, I straight up left the restaurant and began walking towards the only place I really wanted to be. I walked down a road I had walked a thousand times before and eventually I found myself staring at the blackened shell of a house, the surrounding lot fenced in with yellow police tape.

I ducked under the police tape and slowly made my way up to my former home. My heart raced in my chest as memories from all my 18 years alive echoed through my mind. I walked up the charred porch, the wood steps creaking beneath my feet as I slowly made my way up. The eerie sound of children's laughter echoed through my ears as I stepped over the singed threshold, my eyes wandering around the once so beautiful and open room which was now missing the top half of its stairs, the wall behind the fireplace and some of the flooring.

"Dada!"

I whipped my head around to the source of the voice, and for a second the house was back to normal. The formerly blue walls of the living room were once again a vibrant sky blue, the stairs once again led up to an upstairs and the front door was exactly where it was supposed to be.

"Come on, Astrid, you can do it!" A familiar voice called and my heart instantly shattered into a thousand pieces. It was my father's voice. For a moment, I was flung back to reality and was faced with the charred remains of my home yet again. What was happening?

I focused on the source of the sound that echoed through my mind and once again, the house was back to normal, only this time I wasn't the only person there. Before me stood a small, blonde toddler, who was swaying on her feet like she had a little too much to drink. I quickly recognized the toddler as a younger version of myself and the man that was crouched not too far away from the child as my father. My hand flew to my mouth as I let out a muffled sob. I saw him as clearly as I could see myself in a mirror. Those blue eyes that glittered like the ocean on a sunny day, that playful smile that always pulled at his features and that one, small streak of grey in his blonde mane. It was like he really was right there, so close that I could almost touch him.

My younger self began stumbling forward towards my father, who was still crouched with outstretched hands as he waited for the small child to tumble into his arms. "Yes, sweetie, you're doing it! Honey, come quick! Astrid's taking her first steps!"

A loud giggle erupted from my younger self as my father caught me in his arms, lifted me up and spun me around. "You did it! You did it! You did it!"

Suddenly, the scene dissolved into mist, but the house remained unchanged. Laughter echoed through the large house from the upstairs and I turned to glance up where a girl, probably around 6 years old, ran full speed down the hallway, her blonde braid flowing after her as she was followed by her equally giddy parents.

Again, the scene dissolved and melted into another one. I turned towards the couch, where two adults and a small teenager sat, munching on popcorn as they all laughed at the movie that played on the screen before them. I felt my chest ache. How was this happening?

"Astrid," The unusually strict voice of my mother rang through my ears as I had to catch my breath for a second before following it to find out where the next memory would be, the previous memory dissolving just like the others. "Your father is talking to you"

I froze. I knew that tone, I knew that memory. My mind flashed back to that day in the kitchen with my parents and I instantly hated myself for ever having been mad at them.

"Astrid." My father spoke and once again it felt like my heart was breaking into a thousand pieces. I couldn't handle this, I couldn't handle this.

As I leaned against the doorway to the kitchen, I watched as my younger self shot up from her seat and began chewing out our parents. "What, dad? I thought the two of you enjoyed ignoring people when they say or do things you don't like, shouldn't you be proud of me now?"

My mother sighed and I had to fight not to burst into tears. "Astrid, don't—"

"Don't what, Mom?" My younger self sneered and I couldn't help but feel a twinge of cringe and guilt building inside me. "Don't grow up? Don't do things that make me happy? Don't get sad because your parents ignore you for almost a week because of a minor incident? Well, I'm sorry to inform you of this mother, but that's not how things work, that's not how I work, and if you can't understand that... then I'm sorry, but we can't be near each other."

I watched myself storm out of the kitchen, leaving two very distraught-looking parents in my wake. A tear slid down my cheek as my parents silently held each other before vanishing with the mist, which took everything with it this time around. Once again, I found myself in the ruins of my home, all alone. Tears rolled freely down my cheeks as I stumbled over to the stairs and slumped down on the bottom step. If only I had been there to save them ...

"I thought I'd find you here." A familiar voice snapped me out of my daze and surprisingly enough, I wasn't even startled. I glanced up at Hiccup and wiped the tears from my cheeks.

"How'd you know?" I asked my eyes wandering around the ruins of my home.

He shrugged as he walked over and sat down beside me. "Because I know you and I know how much you miss them."

I stared at him for a second, my expression blank before I turned away from him. "I should've been here, Hiccup, I could have saved them."

"Astrid ..." Hiccup brushed a stray hair away from my face as he attempted to gain eye contact with me. "There was nothing you could've done, even if you were here. You remember what the firemen said, right? The fire stared because of faulty wiring, you couldn't have known that and your parents couldn't have known that, there was nothing you could've done except ... die with them."

I turned to face Hiccup with a steely glare. "Maybe that's what I should've done, so that I wouldn't have to be in so much fucking pain all of the fucking time."

"Astrid —"

"No, Hiccup." I sneered as I got up from the stairs and began pacing. "Do you even know how it feels to have lost absolutely everything, Hiccup? Do you know what it feels like to have lost the most important people in your life and the house you grew up in? Do you fucking know what it feels like to be all alone in this fucked up world? No, you don't, because you still have a family and you still have a home, I don't."

"I may not know how that feels, Astrid, but neither do you." Hiccup grabbed a hold of my hand and refused to let go. "Because you haven't lost everything, you aren't alone in the world and you have a family. You have me, my dad, Toothless, Stormfly, Gobber and all of our friends! We are here for you, Astrid and we want to help you, whether you like it or not."

"Fucking Hell, you don't get it, do you, Hiccup? I want to fucking die! I've wanted to fucking die since my parents were zipped up into those fucking body bags and our house was burnt to a fucking crisp. There's nothing Hiccup, absolutely nothing you can do to help me because I've already given up. So just please, leave me here to crumble on my own and find happiness someplace else, because I am not capable of giving you that." I sobbed in frustration at my pale faced boyfriend who seemed to be in shock from me yelling at him, or perhaps even from what I had said to him or maybe even from the tears that were streaming down my cheeks.

Then, he did something that surprised me. He simply wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a tight and loving hug. I couldn't help but completely fall apart in his arms, bawling my eyes out as I fell to the floor, Hiccup steadying me as I gripped onto his shirt like it was my lifeline.

Hiccup pressed a kiss to my forehead as he rubbed soothing circles around my back. "I love you, Astrid Hofferson, no matter if you love yourself or not. I love you and I will never give up on you, alright? I'll always be here, no matter what."

I sniffled as I clutched his shirt even tighter. "I should probably get some help, shouldn't I?"

"Therapy?" Hiccup raised a brow as our gazes locked on each other. I took a second to process it before slowly nodding.

"Yeah." I sighed, as we slowly sank to sit back down at the bottom of the stairs.

Hiccup began stroking my hair, letting me rest my head upon his chest. We sat like that for a good moment before Hiccup began shuffling around in the inner pocket of his jacket for something. I lifted my head from his chest and raised a brow at him, my eyes still red and puffy from my violent outburst.

"What are you doing?" I sniffled as I wrapped my arms around my knees and pulled them up to my chest.

"I just remembered that I brought something for you." Hiccup answered as he pulled up what looked to be a picture frame from the inside of his bomber jacket.

I scrunched my brows together as I wiped my runny nose with the back of my hand and wondered how I had not felt the frame during our embrace. "Why did you bother to bring me something?"

"I got it in the mail yesterday, I thought you'd like it." A warm smile lit up his face as he handed me the picture. Two grinning teens were standing in the picture. The girl in the front wore a familiar royal blue satin gown that brought out those ocean blue eyes of hers much more than any other piece of clothing she owned. Behind her, with his arms wrapped around her waist, stood a slightly taller, auburn-haired boy with mesmerizing emerald eyes, dressed up in a fancy suit as he gazed lovingly down at the female his arms were wrapped around.

My eyes burned with tears as I remembered that evening. Prom night. The last time I had smiled as brightly as I did in that picture. The last time I ever saw my parents. My gaze wandered around the ruins of my home and my heart felt like it had been gripped by an iron fist, which was squeezing it so hard my chest ached. I glanced up at Hiccup. "Thanks."

"Are you sure you like it, because if you don't, we can always get rid—"

"I like it." I breathed. "Thank you."

"Are you sure?" Hiccup raised a brow as he glanced down at the picture.

I nodded slowly as I gently traced the picture. "Yes, it reminds me of better times, happier times. Thank you."

I rested my head on his shoulder and felt them relax considerably. I kept my gaze locked on the photograph, memories flashing through my fragile mind as I blinked away tears. "I love you, Hiccup."

Hiccup rested his head atop mine as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "I love you too, Astrid."