THE CHILD

Learn how to leave the unnecessary things behind, love.

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Important A/N at the end

CHAPTER LXX

*****

STEPPING OUT OF the hospital for the first time in four days felt refreshing. I didn't know the last time I had been outside minus when I was rescued from the container, but I knew it had been long.

It was something that I felt humans took for granted sometimes. The ability to go outside, to feel the sun kiss your skin even when the clouds were out, to feel the cold, unfiltered air wrap you in its embrace and fill your lungs. When you're breathing it in, it's never too warm or too cold. Never too stuffy or too stiff. It was always just right.

I knew the date that I had been captured from my medical records and the date that I had been rescued, but I still didn't know how long I had been in captivity. I could easily do the math, but I didn't want to. The harsh reality was that there was a long time between those dates and I didn't want to think about it.

Not yet.

New York weather was miles different from the usual sun I was used to in California. It was autumn, so I really couldn't complain because I wasn't seeing the worst of it yet.

Leaves were just beginning to tinge warmer colours - there were a few yellows and reds among the greens - and the air was crisp as it blew past us in soft winds.

Whereas I would usually be wearing short skirts and shorts with sleeveless tops, I found myself in a pair of blue skinny jeans, a wooly top with a tank top underneath and some trainers.

Following behind Morgan and Derek towards the car, I couldn't help but wrap my arms around myself as I took in the new surroundings. Getting used to the hospital room wasn't so difficult - there was always too much going on for me to properly take notice of it and hospital rooms weren't that weird anyway.

Getting used to New York was what was going to give me a difficult time. There was so much I needed to do; I wanted to do. I had to get a job, but not while I was pregnant because I can't do anything else other than a desk job when I was pregnant.

And to do a desk job, I needed some kind of qualification. Me, a high school drop out, get a qualification? Pigs would fly the day that would happen.

It wasn't like I couldn't do it - I could. Before I was forced to leave school, I was in junior year. A grade above my normal age range because I excelled in academics. My abilities in art only brought my overall grade up, but all that went to shit because my mother had kicked me out.

All of that potential, the high grades and the scholarship opportunities had gone to shit because my mother - my own mother - lost faith in me.

I placed a hand on my stomach, shaking my head slightly. I would never ever do that to my child. I would offer him or her guidance and my opinion on things, but I would always always support them in whatever they chose to do with their life.

As a mother, it wasn't my job to tell my child what to do. It was my job to guide them and be there to help them whenever they needed it.

Unless I was leaving too, I would never kick my child out. Never. No matter what reason I had.

Snapping me out of my thoughts was Morgan placing a hand around my waist. I looked at her and she smiled warmly at me, almost as if she could feel the way tears were brimming my eyes and my heart was pounding heavily in my chest.

Derek opened the door for me and I slid in, letting him close the door behind me before doing the same thing for Morgan. I wondered if that annoyed him, having to do that twice. Before I came along, it was probably just for Morgan.

I frowned as the car started, my thoughts going in a different direction. I didn't want to be a burden to them. The truth of the matter was that I had no other way to contribute because I couldn't work and I had no other place to go.

If I had just been given the opportunity to grab all the money I had saved up after working in Lucien's Estate for five years, this probably wouldn't have been a concern. I remembered back then, the first time that I had hid the wad of hundred dollar bills under the loose floorboards to save, I had envisioned something to do with college in the far future.

The vision didn't last long, but the money did.

I didn't even want to think about how many thousands that were still probably sitting there with nobody knowing about it. If I would have known that this would happen, then I would have told Anna to keep it. At least it wouldn't end up being nothing.

My frown deepened at the thought of Anna. I wondered how she was doing. She said that she would go with me anywhere, but this trip was impromptu. And I wasn't sure how open Derek and Morgan would've been about taking the both of us in.

I missed her. I missed her smile. I missed her positive atmosphere. I missed her whole energy. Anna was irreplaceable and I would give anything to reach out to here again, but when we based our whole lives on the Internet and phone numbers, it was so easy to lose touch.

And even if I could contact her, I wouldn't. That would be too risky. I would just be drawing attention to myself and probably putting her life in danger. It was better if Daniel just presumed I was dead.

“Morgan? Do you want to stop at the park?” I heard Derek ask, making me look up at the both of them from the backseat.

I wondered why he was asking because he was the one driving the car anyway. Still, Morgan nodded and turned to him.

“Sure. But we can't stay long because the forecast said something about rain today.”

“Why are we going to the park?” I piped up from the backseat. Derek glanced at me from the rear view mirror but let Morgan answer my question instead.

“No reason. We just want to get a bit of fresh air.”

The park was half an hour away from the hospital. It was a huge area which was split into different sections. The section I could see looked more like a forest with tall densely packed trees. I knew that the place at night was probably many murder-mystery writers' muse, but I bit back that comment and followed them as they both slammed the door shut and began walking down the long trail.

Walking behind them, I couldn't help but feel like a burden. Like a piece that wasn't supposed to be there and the truth of the matter was I wasn't supposed to be there.

But there was no where else that was safer for me, so I sucked up my discomfort and focused on the abundant nature surrounding me.

Despite the eerie feel the place had to it, it was oddly beautiful from the inside. The trees were kind of like a blanket, sheilding us from the angry sky as thunder rumbled through the ground.

There were bushes lining the path, all with different flowers and fruit that were in blume since it was autumn.

It was autumn. Daniel was already twenty-two. I missed his birthday.

For a second, I felt my heart ache. I wanted to be there and force him to remember that whatever he did, there was always someone who still loved him - who saw the good in him. Someone who saw how he strived to keep his family safe. How he gave thousands of dollars to homeless people freely. How he donated hours of his time to helping a priest in church even though he didn't go to mass himself.

It sucked, really. Because there was no other reason to hate Daniel except for the bullshit that he had pulled on me. I couldn't even hate him for not loving me because he never claimed to.

And the worst part is, I never expected him to.

God, I needed to stop think about him.

The necklace around my neck made itself known in that moment. The cold metal burnt against my skin and I felt myself gulp as I took it in my hands and looked down to it.

Every logical cell in my body was telling me to remove the necklace and chuck it into the lake that we seemed to be approaching, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

A large part of me still wanted to be near him; to feel him. To pretend that he still cared. It was almost as if he was still protecting me.

I mean, it was weird. That it just so happened to be those men who handled me and they just so happened to have bad blood between them before they just so happened to have taken it out on each other right when people were most likely to intervene. And then the fact that the dream had come to me the time it did; Morgan's number and everything and the fact that my baby was still fine after all of that trauma.

How did that happen? When was I ever that lucky? I couldn't help but feel like it was because of the necklace - like it was protecting me; like he was protecting me.

I sighed and shook my head before stuffing it inside my top. Getting rid of the necklace would be an important step in getting over Daniel, but right now I just wanted to stay heartbroken for a while. I accepted that I was, but I didn't want to move on.

I wanted to live in my fantasy and feel his warmth for a little bit longer. Just until I was strong enough to pick up the shards of my broken heart, but until then...

“You know, you're so strong, Araceli,” Morgan said, speaking up for the first time since we had stepped out of the car.

I snapped my head up and looked at her, feeling lost as to what she was saying.

“After all that's happened to you and I haven't seen you shed a single tear.”

She had a point. I had spent my whole life crying over pointless shit, like when I was sleeping with Daniel behind Celeste's back and I cried instead of her for example. But now that I actually had a reason to cry, I wasn't.

Was that just a part of the trauma? Or was it me being strong? I didn't feel very strong, so I assumed it was the former.

I was just wondering when the day would come and I would breakdown. When I would absolutely lose my shit and tell everyone to fuck off and break things and let myself believe that I was back in that hell hole again.

I knew it would happen. I was just hoping that it wouldn't happen when I had my baby.

“Things will get better,” she said softly, slowing her steps so she could fall into step with me. That was when the first drop of rain landed on my forehead and I looked up through the cracks of the tree branches into the angry sky.

“We should go,” Derek said, turning around to face the both of us.

Morgan beamed before running towards the car. “Last one back has to do laundry this week.”

The two went sprinting off and I found myself going after them. I ended up last, but by the time I had got inside the car, Derek had somehow forced Morgan to do the laundry in one of their many arguments.

Soon, we were driving off again.

***

“Morgan!”

I stopped my gaping at the large suburban house and turned around to see a black kid, around the age of six running up to Morgan before wrapping his arms around her.

She scooped him up and spun him in her arms, making him giggle before yeeting him over to Derek who caught him and did the same.

“Where's Mia?” he asked after placing him back on his feet.

“In the garden,” the boy answered, hiding behind Morgan's legs and peaking out to stare at me.

“I'll go tell her we're back,” Derek said before walking past us towards what I assumed would be their garden.

Morgan turned to me after he left and smiled. “Ara,” she said, softly calling for my attention as if I would freak out if she spoke any louder. “You already know Maxwell.”

She gestured towards the boy and I searched my brain, trying to remember where exactly I remembered the name from before finally remembering the name of the child that I had been forced to care for the day everything seemed to go downhill.

Little Maxwell.

“This is him?” I asked with shock. She only hummed and I found myself looking back at him. “He's grown so much since I saw him.” I crouched down to his height and held my hand out for him which he took almost immediately. “How old are you, little guy?”

“I'm six,” he said, looking proud of himself for holding up the correct amount of fingers. “You're pretty.”

His words took me by surprise and I found myself bursting out into a fit of laughter at his sudden compliment. “Thank you. You are too, handsome.”

“Boys can't be pretty, silly,” he giggled and ran off the other way, leaving me to stand up and straighten myself up.

“I'm going to break his poor little heart some day when I introduce him to Frank Ocean.” I couldn't help but let our a small laugh at her words. “Come on. We should get you settled.”

*****

It's half twelve at night and I'm on the midst of a breakdown. Lmao, imagine a house being held together with Elmers glue.

Yeah, exactly.

Anyways, this will be better in the rewritten version I promise.

Goodbye.

Oh yeah! And the shit that happens in the second book- Whew chile! That second book is sum else!