THE GOSSIP

Not everything is always black and white, love. Life isn't a newspaper.

***

CHAPTER LVIII

*****

I WALKED INTO Daniel's room, wanting to take a warm shower to help soothe my aching stomach. I didn't want to talk to Daniel about seeing a doctor mainly because I didn't want to talk to Daniel.

End of.

I also didn't feel as bad as I thought I could be. I mean, I wasn't in crippling pain, unable to move, sobbing for someone to take me to the hospital. I was fine. Or at least that was what I wanted to believe.

The truth was Lola didn't do as much damage as she probably thought she did. Her kicks were more targeted towards my ribs than my stomach and she only got one proper kick to my abdomen before I rolled onto the other side. I was fine.

Or maybe I wasn't. I just didn't want bad news.

Daniel looked up at me from his sofa, a look of complete exhaustion on his face. If it were before this, I probably would've wanted to wrap my arms around him and comfort him, but now I just wanted to wrap my arms around him and strangle him.

“Are you okay?”

Without looking to him or even properly acknowledging him, I continued on my way to the bathroom. “You don't care so don't ask.” And then I slammed the door shut behind, taking a deep breath once I was finally alone to gather my thoughts.

I walked over to the basin and looked into the mirror, having my reflection stare right back at me. I didn't know if it was me I was looking at or if it was a zombie.

It seemed like I hadn't slept in days with dark bags under my bloodshot eyes and even through my dark complexion, my cheeks were tinged red and were puffy from me rubbing at them to wipe my tears away. I tried lifting my lips into a smile, but the frown remained permanent, only matching the deep sadness I could see in my eyes.

They filled with unshed tears as I squeezed my hands into fists.

What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I just have good things? Why couldn't some good happen and then nothing else would happen after that? Why did the world hate me so much?

Why did I hate myself so much?

Fuck, I was a bag of constant negativity.

I stared at my reflection and willed myself to smile because I needed to be happy. People would run away if I was too sad all the time or too angry or—

Fuck, what was the point of caring anymore? What was the point of giving a shit about what other people thought of me? The truth of the matter was I was Araceli and I was very fucking sad. Most of the time. I needed help, but my cry for it remained silent.

How did I even know if someone cared? Obviously, I didn't know people. After how long, I finally realised that I really didn't know people. So why did I make myself believe that they cared? That Anna cared? Than Daniel cared?

Nobody cared! Not even me.

“Your friends are your enemies and your enemies are your friends.”

What did he mean by that? Was I trusting the wrong people? Obviously I was. I trusted him, but maybe... maybe he wasn't the only one that was ready to stab me in the back if the opportunity presented itself.

I found my mind drifting off to Anna, trying to figure out what her motives were. Everyone had a motive, right? So what was hers? What reason did she have to deal with my bullshit and call herself my friend even after all of my baggage?

I shook my head clean of the thoughts. No, it wasn't the time. Anna was my best friend, freely and wholeheartedly and I knew she would always be there for me. Whatever her reasons where, I wasn't about to push her out.

I sniffled and wiped away my tears before turning to the shower. I felt something drip down my legs, and mindlessly, I reached out for some tissue to wipe it away. The red stain on the white sheet didn't alarm me until a few seconds had passed.

Because I realised that pregnant women didn't have periods.

My heart beat skyrocketed and with shaky hands, I tore more sheets of the roll before wiping myself down. There wasn't that much blood, but was I going to risk it? The pain was almost gone, but blood was never a good sign anyway.

I remembered reading somewhere that sometimes you bled when you were pregnant, but how much blood was too much? What did I have to look out for?

I walked towards the door, ready to tell Daniel to book an appointment for me because no amount of my stubbornness could risk my baby's life, but as soon as I opened it, I froze in my tracks at what I saw.

Or who I saw.

Celeste was by the door with her back against it and at my sudden entrance, both her and Daniel's eyes snapped up to me.

“So it is true,” she said lowly, letting her eyes take over me as I tried to compose myself.

“This isn't the time,” Daniel said in a warning voice, not even looking up from his phone.

The guy had two women in his room that wanted him for one reason or the other and he couldn't even find it in him to care.

Celeste nodded her head and sucked her bottom lip into her mouth before looking at me. With a fake smile, she spoke. “I don't know why I put it past you to not sleep with him behind my back.”

I said nothing.

“I should have seen it coming,” she continued, looking as if she was beating herself up mentally. “It was so fucking obvious, I should have seen it coming.”

“You don't even want him.”

“But you're my friend,” she hissed, making me scoff and roll my eyes. “You literally made me look like a complete idiot. You could've told me something; I wouldn't have judged you.”

I took a step closer to her, my feelings completely switched off as I ignored all of her good points. I was just too tired to care. “I'm sorry,” I said, making her brows raise in surprise. “For being better than you.”

She raised her hand and slapped me right across the face, making my cheek burn along with the sound of the slap echoing in the room. Daniel stood up immediately and grabbed her arm, harshly pulling her away from me as I stood up straighter and stared her right in the eyes, doing the same thing I did on the night I first met her.

Bite my tongue.

“You know what, you can have him,” she sneered, making me let out a cold laugh because she really wasn't in the position to tell me who I could and couldn't have. “But I want you to know that the same way you get the is the same way you lose them.”

My laugh was bitter and cold and bounced of the walls of the room, gaining the both of their attention. “Oh, but you never had him, sweetheart.”

I winked at her before turning the other way and making my way over to the bathroom, feeling unaffected by the burning glare she was shooting in my direction.

“I feel pity for anyone who calls you a friend,” she sneered one last time before she threw the door open and slammed it shut behind her.

Without casting Daniel another glance, I slammed the bathroom door shut behind me and locked it so I could cry peacefully without having him watch me.

***

That night I slept in my room and the next morning, I woke up to a pounding headache. I spent a good five minutes puking my guys out into the nearest toilet seat, but instead of complaining, I remained thankful. Because morning sickness was a sign that I was still pregnant.

It wasn't until I walked up to La Bruja for my tasks for the week did my day begin heading south.

“You don't work here anymore, Araceli.”

I glared at her, holding the envelope with my severance pay in my right hand while I balled my left hand into a fist.

“What?”

“I'm sorry. Boss didn't want you working here anymore, so...”

I had heard enough. Without listening to the rest of her explanation, I went storming down the hall in search of Daniel because I wanted to rip him to pieces. I didn't think she would care - after all, I didn't have to answer to her anymore.

I found it odd, because La Bruja looked sad when she broke the news to me. I didn't know why because I was under the impression that she hated me for the longest time. Maybe she was sad that she wouldn't have anyone to torture anymore. I could understand that; I would be sad too.

Before I could reach Daniel's room, ready to yell his head off for firing me, Anna stepped into my view and smiled at me.

“Ara! Where have you been? I went to your room to talk to you yesterday but you weren't—”

“Anna, please. I don't have time to talk to you right now,” I said, not realising how rude my words were until they left my lips. I winced at the crestfallen expression on her face and quickly apologised. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to speak to you like that. I just...” I sighed and held up the letter in my hand, feeling the tears burn the back of my eyes. “I just got fired.”

“Oh no.” She was by my side in an instant and a look of devastation fell onto her face. “Babe, I'm so sorry. I didn't know.”

“It's fine, nobody knew.” I smiled brightly at her, showing that I wasn't going to let it get me down. “I'm going to force Daniel to give me my job back.”

“Atta girl.” She stopped talking for a second and wrapped an arm around my shoulder. “You know if it doesn't work out and you have to leave, I'm going with you right?”

I pulled away, feeling my heart stop beating in my chest. “What?”

“I'm quitting my job and going where you go.” She smiled warmly at me. “You're the only family I have here. This is home because you're here. I'm going wherever you go.”

I searched her eyes, looking for any indication that she was joking, but she wasn't! She was willing to put her whole life on the line just to make sure she was with me.

I asked myself whether I was willing to do the same if the roles were reversed. Would I leave everything I had ever known to follow her to Europe? Or to Africa? Or maybe even just to Manhattan? Could I abandon Pablo and Daniel?

I didn't want to know the answer to that.

Instead, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into me. “You're a good friend, Anna.” I don't know why I ever doubted you.

I bit that comment back and smiled at her before beginning to walk down the hallway again, this time with calmer steps and my best friend by my side.

“Oh, since you weren't around much yesterday, let me fill you in on the latest gossip.”

I laughed, throwing my head back and letting myself forget about all my heartache because Anna was the kind of person who made you do that. “Go on then.”

“First one, and I think you'll like this one,” she said, turning to me briefly before almost tripping on the carpet in the split second she wasn't looking. She quickly brushed herself off and continued on like nothing happened. “Anyway, we got word that Lola got fired.”

“What?” I looked to her in shock and she nodded her head and giggled. “When did this happen?”

“Yesterday. They literally tossed her out of the house and she was screaming and crying and everything. I'm surprised you didn't hear.” Obviously, I was too busy crying myself to sleep. “The weird part is she really looked roughed up. Like her face was black and blue with bruises and all of her hair was shaved off.”

Having your hair shaved off in the cartel wasn't something to be proud of. Sure, as a woman you could do it to yourself and completely rock the look but if it was a man (specifically a man of high rank) in the cartel that had done the shaving, it was the highest order of shame and shows others that you had committed a great atrocity.

“I wonder what she did to get that,” I thought out loud before finally realising what it was.

In short, Lola had gotten tossed out because of me. And I couldn't find it in me to care.

“I don't know but it must have been bad because boss was so close to killing her.”

“Oh.”

“Speaking of boss,” she said, unaware of my sudden change in mood. “One of the maids overheard him talking to Guillermo about leaving the house to a different, private home away from the city.”

I snapped my eyes to her, my brain working over time to try and figure out what that meant for me. “He asked me to pack my bags. You don't think...”

“Oh my God, Ara, he's taking you with him,” Anna squealed, jumping around and celebrating at the news whereas I just stood in one spot, staring at the same portrait on the wall. “You have to promise that you'll take me with you.”

“I...” So then what was the reason for our fight? Couldn't he have just told me this instead of literally killing me from a broken heart? That was why I was fired? What the fuck was wrong with that man; why couldn't he just communicate for fuck sakes?

“Okay, okay. Last thing,” she said after calming down, making me look to her but hear and see nothing because I was so lost in thought. “Apparently, Pablo and Ms. Emma were in a secret relationship, but Pablo broke up with her like a couple days ago.”

That seemed to be the hardest blow and as I stared at an oblivious Anna with wide eyes, I could feel my heart slowly dropping to my stomach.

“I know right! I didn't even know they were together in the first place!”

The panic that was brewing in my head had gone unnoticed by her even as I placed a hand on my chest to calm my erratic heart beat. It was a failed attempt because nothing could calm the turmoil in my head.

It all made sense. That's why she was acting weird and opened up to me. She said she didn't know what would happen if she didn't have Pablo—

Dammit, she already knew I was pregnant then! That's why she felt so alone and she probably felt like I had taken Daniel away from her completely.

She needed Pablo.

I went sprinting down the opposite way from the way we were going, hearing Anna following quickly behind me as I rushed and almost tripped down a flight of stairs.

“Ara, what's wrong?”

I turned around, holding onto her shoulders as I stared at her with wide eyes. My heart was pounding but I felt like no blood was being pumped to my head.

“You need to call Daniel and Pablo. Tell them to go to Emma's room.” She stared at me, confused and surprised, but I only shook my head and turned around. “Now!”

I heard her jump at my loud shout, but I didn't stop running until I reached Emma's room.

“Emma?” I called out, knocking on the door gently as my voice came out strained. “Emma, are you in there?”

Silence.

I turned the knob, knowing that if she wasn't in her room, the door wouldn't be locked. It gave way immediately, making me let out a relieved breath.

It was stolen again almost instantaneously as I took in the sight of her bedroom. Everything was a mess, but there was no sign of her.

On the ground near her nightstand was an empty bottle of pills and I started fearing the worst again. My eyes zeroed in on the bathroom that was closed and I immediately walked over to it, not bothering to call out to her as I twisted the knob.

Locked.

I turned it again before trying the other way and then shaking it violently once I had finally given up.

“Emma, I know you're there. There's something really important I need to talk to you about. Emma, please open the door,” I pleaded, slapping my palm against the wood. “I-if you can hear me, make a sound. Anything Emma, just say something. Open the door. Emma, please.”

Both Daniel and Pablo came rushing into the room, stopping in front of me to address's the situation.

“What's wrong, Ara?” Pablo asked, making me whip around to look at both of them with tears brimming my eyes.

“I need you to break the door.”

“What?” Daniel asked before walking past me and turning the doorknob, only to find it locked like I had. I refrained from telling him I could've just told him that if he had asked and instead turned to Pablo.

“Please. I need you to break the door. Emma is in there and I think...” I looked down to the pill bottle again. “I think she took something.”

Daniel wasted no time grabbing the handle and knocking all of his body weight into it. Pablo joined him and with the both of them, it didn't stand a chance. The bathroom door swung open, revealing to me something I knew would mar my memories for the rest of my life.

*****

Do you think Araceli is stupid? I think Araceli is stupid.

Daniel is annoying and needs to fuck off. So is Celeste, nobody likes you bitch. Anna must be protected at all costs.

She's the one character in this book that I've never been angry at and it's going to stay that way.

Anyway, do yall know what's going on with these covid vaccines because I've been hearing things about it and even how students are scheduled to get them too (think it's just a rumour though). And I'm hella excited because my friends are talking about a sleep over once we get them and I've never been to a sleep over.

I just don't want to get my heart broken because my hopes are already up, yanno?