THE RESULT

Other people struggle, love. Just like you do.

***

CHAPTER LV

*****

HOURS LATER, WE finally arrived home. The sun was beginning to rise, but dawn hadn't broke yet so by the time we got back, nobody was awake.

I had the option to sleep and catch up on lost time, but after the detour Anna and I had taken to pick up a pregnancy test in the closest pharmacy, I realised that I wouldn't be able to catch a wink of sleep without knowing.

I sighed and kicked the covers off my body before snatching the plastic bag off my desk. I threw my door open and stepped out of the room, not bothering to close it back again as I quietly made my way to the nearest bathroom. I slipped in past the slightly ajar door, and after closing and locking it, I was quick to do my business.

It took a while to force myself to pee, but after I did successfully, the rest was smooth sailing from there.

I washed up and placed the cap on the test before stuffing it in my pocket again and walking back to my room. The box said that I had to wait five minutes and two lines meant I was pregnant whereas one meant I wasn't. I took longer than normal on my walk back to the room, occasionally stopping to admire a piece of hall decoration before continuing on.

By the time I reached my room again, there was only two minutes left - I was counting.

I slipped back into bed and pulled the covers all the way to my chin even though I was burning up. My thoughts raced in my head, but I couldn't pinpoint one and I felt a headache start to come on.

In a last ditch attempt, I began counting down the seconds in my head to keep myself from overthinking. Two minutes was long up by the time that I had finished counting, but I wanted to hold on to that last bit of hope.

Slowly, and with reluctant fingers, I picked the test up from my nightstand and looked at the results. My thoughts roared again much like last time, but the only thing that I could focus on was the test.

And the dark blue line that was there before I took the test. And the faint blue line that joined it after I took the test.

I was pregnant with Daniel's baby.

“Shit.”

I wasn't entirely known for running away. I usually solved all my problems with a firm fist to the face, but I couldn't punch Daniel and I most definitely couldn't punch the baby in me either.

That left running away. The classic fight or flight instinct and for the first time in my life, I picked flight.

I hissed and threw the test back onto the nightstand as if it was the source of all my problems before kicking my legs out from under the duvet and onto the floor. That time, when I left the room, I didn't care to close the door quietly in case the other maids were sleeping.

In fact, I didn't know what boomed louder. The door slamming shut or the sound of my heart beat in my ears.

I let my legs carry me towards Daniel's room, the very person that was the cause of my distress. I didn't know what to think; I was on the verge of freaking out.

I couldn't be pregnant! I was too young; too immature. Any kid who had to suffer with me as their mother was already done for. I could barely take care of myself, not to talk of a small child.

What if something happens and I can't control my temper and I accidentally hit it? What if I lose the baby before it's even born? What if I raise it horribly and they hate me for the rest of my life? What if they let me down like I let my moth—

No. Nothing my child does would ever make me want to kick them out. In my eyes, they're completely perfect the way they are. Even when unborn.

I sighed and shook my head. My thoughts were a mess. That's why I needed Daniel. Because he would know what to do. He would have a plan brewing in his head. I was ready to follow him wherever he went.

Without knocking on the door, I twisted the knob and stepped in, surprised to see him wide awake on his armchair facing his balcony with a glass of some golden liquid in his hand.

“Why are you still awake?” I asked lowly, my voice echoing around the dark room as he snapped his eyes to me.

I clicked the door shut quietly behind me before slowly making my way over to him.

“Why are you awake?” he asked, turning the question back on me as I rolled my eyes.

I stopped in front of him, wanting to take a seat in the chair opposite his, but he grabbed my waist and pulled me down onto his lap. I let out a squeak, giggling slightly as his fingers dug into my flesh and tickled me.

His lips quirked upward and he raised an eyebrow at me. “You're ticklish?”

“Don't you dare, Daniel,” I warned, grabbing the both of his hands and pinning then together in front of his stomach.

He smirked and wriggled his wrists together, easily breaking my hold on them. He kept them together still and let me have my fun, rolling his eyes at the stern look in mine.

I sighed and let go of him before letting my hand trail down his broad chest. I stopped at his shoulder and ran my thumb over the scar left by the gunshot. Every time I thought back to it, I cringed because I couldn't begin to imagine the pain he had to endure.

If I knew, I would've taken the bullet for him.

“I took the test,” I found myself blurting out, instantly getting his attention as he looked at me. “It was positive.”

He didn't say anything, letting the silence envelope the both of us like a warm blanket. I began fearing for the worst.

What if he doesn't think it's his? What if he wants me to get rid of it? What if he has no future plans with me and the only thing I'll ever be to him is the mother of his child? What if—

“You're pregnant,” he said in a low voice, cutting the roaring rampage in my head off.

He placed his hand on my stomach, making my breath hitch as I stared at it.

In a hopeful attempt, I placed my hand over his. “We're pregnant.”

He continued staring at my flat stomach before finally meeting my eyes. I couldn't read his emotions. He wasn't being cold with me, but his eyes were a turmoil of different feelings; different thoughts and questions.

Daniel was too complex to read so easily.

“So,” he said, his voice holding a lighter tone to it as he leaned back. “Alaska huh?”

I couldn't help but beam, because I knew then that we would be okay. No matter what happened.

“I'm telling you now, the kid is going to love goats.”

***

Daniel yawned for the third time and I rolled my eyes and leaned back. We had been talking for hours and the sun was finally rising, but he didn't want to go to sleep.

Obviously that meant that I wasn't going to leave him alone awake either because what kind of girlfriend did that? Instead I was going to nag him until he finally agreed and cared for his health too.

“Daniel, you need to sleep.”

He groaned and rolled his eyes before looking out towards the curtains as if they were going to rescue him from me. I grabbed his face and forced him to look at me, only making him smirk at my actions.

“You're cute when you try to act like me.”

“Oh. So you do know you're demanding.” He rolled his eyes at that, but said nothing else. “Daniel, please just sleep. I'm worried for you.”

“You shouldn't be,” he said simply, but I wasn't going to give up that easy.

“Why don't you want to sleep?” I asked, pouting. “It's not like you're not tired. You are. Why?”

He sighed and collapsed back into his seat before running his hand down his face. After a couple seconds, he opened his eyes again and looked at me. “That's when my demons mess with me the most.”

I didn't know what to say. What kind of things did one have to see to also be denied peace in their sleep? What kind of things did one have to do to be tormented as much as he was?

“I'll be right here,” I said, placing my hand on his cheek, but he only shrugged it away and laughed.

“That'll only making it worse.”

My heart broke at his words, a feeling of regret filling my chest because I couldn't help him. I was willing to do anything for him and even that wasn't enough.

“I'll leave if you want,” I said, slowly taking my hand away from his body. He caught my wrist in his hands though and placed my palm against his cheek again, making my stomach flutter.

“No,” he said, his voice low as he stared right at me, yet looked like he wasn't seeing me at all. “I want you to stay.”

I got up off his lap and helped him up even though I knew he didn't need me. Slowly, we both walked towards his bed but I didn't get in with him. I watched from the side, making sure that he was comfortable and smiled as I noticed his eyes droop until they were completely closed as soon as his head hit the pillow.

“Don't go anywhere,” I could hear him say even in his sleep. And surprisingly enough, his voice came out almost pleading.

I ran a hand through his hair, noticing how he shivered at my touch. “I'll be right here.”

I sighed and then walked over to the armchair and took a seat. I pulled my knees up to my chest and stared out the window, letting all the sleep I missed take me completely with only one thought in my mind.

What happened to you, Daniel?

***

I woke up in Daniel's bed the next morning, completely enveloped by his scent but with him nowhere in sight. My neck hurt, letting me know that I had most likely spent the better part of my sleep on the armchair. He probably moved me to the bed when he woke up.

I wouldn't put it past him.

With a gentle yawn and a long stretch, I got out of his bed and began my day. It was half twelve in the afternoon, but I didn't care because I knew La Bruja wouldn't. As much as she disliked me, I knew she wasn't so unreasonable as to not allow me to sleep after a long trip.

I was half way through doing the laundry when the door to the laundry room had opened and a specific blonde that I was worried about stepped in.

“I don't want to fight you,” Emma said quickly, raising her hands in surrender as I placed the basket on the washing machine and looked at her. “I just wanted to apologise to you for... My actions.”

I said nothing and folded my arms as I watched her sigh.

“I'm sorry for everything that I did to you, hitting you, calling you all those names. I was just blinded by my anger and... And my jealousy.” I tilted my my head to the side, wanting her to explain herself further. “Daniel... He's like... The best. He's the only family I've ever known and, as of recent, he's been pushing me away. Pushing everyone away. Everyone except you. I felt like you were stealing him from. I felt the little bit of affection he gave me would be taken completely by you because you made him... Happy. Happier than I had ever seen him. Happier than I had ever made him.”

Daniel was happy? I was yet to see it.

“You weasled your way into his life and made him respect you and put his trust in you and made him really really really like you. Love you even! And I just felt like... You took my spot. I mean the only reason we still even see each other is because we live together. If he gets married and has a family and life of his own, I know I'll be cast aside.”

Silence fell onto us in that moment and I felt my hands subconsciously come to my stomach. My mind raced and my heart beat harder in my chest. Obviously, it must have taken a lot for Emma to open up to me like this and she was still trying to deal with her emotions.

I decided then that I wouldn't tell her about the baby. This would only be adding salt to an open wound. I needed her to gather herself and heal first.

With a sigh, I stepped closer to her and placed my hand on her shoulder. “Emma, you're his sister. You have a specific space in his heart that I will never be able to fill. And I don't want to fill. Daniel loves you. He has a weird way of showing it, but I know he does.”

She gave me a sad smile, and taking me by surprise, she wrapped her arms around me and pulled me into her for a hug. “If it wasn't for you, Pablo and Daniel, I don't know where I would be right now.”

I rubbed her back softly and smiled. “You would be right here, doing as good as you are now. Maybe even better.” I then pulled away and took her face in my hand so she would look at me. “You don't even need us. We need you.”

Her lips stretched into a wobbly smile and she pulled me back into the hug again.

*****

Since my author's notes having been lacking as of late, here I am to fix it.

First of all, if a white woman clutches her bag and acts scared around me just because of the colour of my skin, best believe I'm gon' clutch my bag harder and act the same damn way. There bitch. Now we both look like criminals. What now?

You gon cry? I'm wailing louder. You gon' faith? Well, looky here, I'm dead, love.

Now that we're on the topic of race, is it me or does anyone else never see a single white person in a book with a black main character? And I'm not talking POC, because I see white people in Asian books but when it's a black person...

Crickets.

Anyway, we're about to hit another milestone and I don't even know what to do to celebrate. I can't even post a bonus chapter because there's no way I can get a bonus out of what's gonna happen next. When I tell yall that this is the last happy chapter, believe me.

I'm actually not playing this time. And yall, the plot twists I have for this book. Chile-

Anyways, lemme not say too much.

Stay in school yall. And don't do hard drugs, but weed is fine. Don't be peer pressured into something you don't wanna do and you are the best thing that's ever happened to you so love yourself ❤️

Bye!