~•~

you and I, we held on to our broken relation together,
and today when I look back at those days, I realise it just made us stronger.

M A N I K

And yet again, she suffered because of me. She sat just two feet away, so close yet she seemed so far. Her eyes stared outside the window, no emotion playing through them. She blinked everyone once in a while, but never did her eyes reach mine. Ever since I found her, she seemed lost.

Had I found her or lost her?

I wanted to tell her so many things, yet we both preferred to keep quiet. There was so much silence, yet I could hear her heart breaking from inside. Her eyes were drowsy and there was no smile on her lips. And all I knew was, I couldn't see her this way.

We all made mistakes, but I made too many of them.

Irritated by my own thoughts, I immediately dialled Cabir. "Cancel the concert!" I took a deep breath as I said, just as he picked up the phone.

"Manik!" Nandini almost snapped at me in a whisper. And since an hour, it was the first time she spoke something to me, she took my name, she looked into my eyes.

"Please don't cancel the concert, please!" She begged, her hand slowly on mine and I gulped hard. "I can't do this anymore, Nandini", I sighed, confessing. I was tired, I was tired of everything happening in my life. Everything happened too fast for me to even understand.

"For me, Manik please!" She whisper cried and I gave in. I looked at her helplessly and she she blinked her eyes in assurance, yet no smile on her face. I was missing her smile, her energetic voice, the excitement and hope in her eyes, the voice of her giggles, the warmth in her touch.

"For you..," I repeated aimlessly as I spoke back on the phone, but I didn't miss how her eyes shone for a second as she looked away again. If this makes her happy, I'm ready to sing all day all night, until she is satisfied. Just for her.

The car stopped in front of my house as she got down and I got down with her. I hated to leave her this way, yet that is what she wanted.

"Bye Manik!" She tried smiling waving her hand at me. She was not broken or depressed or anything, she was tired just as I was. We were both tired of fighting for our love, proving it every time. And this seemed like a never ending process.

"Bye Nandini." I whispered to myself as her figure disappeared from my eyes and I turned back to the car, frustrated of course. Banging my hand to the car metal, I let out a sharp cry. I was frustrated, and it suddenly was feeling as if she was giving up on me. Not physically, but mentally.

Just when I was going to sit in the car, I felt the softest hands on my arm, making me stop where I was as she kept her head on my back, hugging m from behind. I stood rooted in my place, feeling her so close to me, again. I turned around, not letting her pull away as I took her into the hardest hug I must have ever hugged.

We both needed it. We needed assurance that we were fine once again, together. I wanted to know she was mine and only mine, and maybe she wanted to know the same.

I couldn't let her go. Not now, not today, not ever. I needed her with at all times of the day and night, every second, every minute of my life. She had fitted into my life just like the missing piece of a puzzle, which felt incomplete in her absence.

Holding her hand, I carried her up, one of my hand under her knees and the other under her neck.

"Manik...!" She was shocked, nevertheless, she didn't protest as she hid her face in my chest and hugged the coat tighter to her body and I couldn't stop looking at her as I carried her all the way inside to our room and put her on the bed.

She looked at me with an emotion unknown as she slowly hit her lower lip and I smiled weakly at her, my hand holding her right cheek and neck. Taking a small glance at her for the last time, I got up to leave as she firmly held me hand.

Looking behind, I saw she wasn't looking at me. Her eyes were fixed to the bed sheets but her hand held my arm tighter, her nails pricking into my skin as I sat near her. My arm hurt, but definitely not how much she was hurting. So I let her be, I let her dig her nails into my skin and let the blood out as she squeezed her eyes tighter, as if remembering what happened some hours back.

She slowly opened her eyes again, and just when her her eyes fell upon my bleeding arm, her eyes widened as she immediately withdrew her hand, and I analysed the change in her expression.

"I'm so-.. sorry...," she whispered back in shock as a lone tear escaped her left eye. Her fingers caressed the nail marks imprinted on my skin which still bled and another tear fell of her eye.

I gently rubbed the tears off her face with my thumb and she looked at me, trying to say something but I stopped her by kissing her crown. "It's okay... ssshhh!" I whispered, as she banged into my chest, slowly breaking down.

"I'm sorry Manik, I'm sorry!", she whispered after every five seconds and every time she said that, I hugged her a bit tighter to show her I was there for her, I was going to hold her tight when she needed me.

That's exactly when my eyes fell on the red bruises on her shoulder, partially covered by the coat she was wearing. Putting my hand on that, I slowly removed her coat. Everyone my finger brushed the bruise, a small hiss left her mouth and some more anger collected in my head against the jerk who hurt my princess in such a way.

"Manik...!" She slowly whispered crying. Her face displayed so many emotions that I actually didn't know which one to concentrate on as I slowly bent down, kissing her bruises on her shoulder and she slowly lay, me leaning above her.

Her top was torn from the left side, and I could feel my hand touch her bare skin underneath that as she shivered with my cold touches. Slowly, I covered both of us with the duvet as she closed her eyes, her lips gently brushing my ear lobe.

My hands involuntarily reached her top as I pulled it up and she did the same to me. I looked at her bruised skin underneath, which hurt me. Two years of our relationship, and this was the first time we were so intimate.

Grabbing the cream from the side drawer, I caressed the wounds upon her shoulder and her collar bone, slowly kissing it all the way, pouring all my love inside.

Her hand gripped my shoulder tightly as I kissed her neck all the way up, and she tilted her face to the side, giving me access. I loved the effect my touch had on her, I loved the way she was giving herself to me.

I kissed every place where his filthy hands could have touched her and there was a small smile on her lips as my name often left her lips.

Her hands caressed my back until her eyes fell on the tattoo on my back. "When did you get this tattoo done?", she slowly asked kissing it once as I closed my eyes upon suddenly feeling her lips on skin.

"When I was seventeen...," I confessed and she smiled, tracing her fingers on my tattoo and my back.

"I want to get a tattoo done too!" She confessed with an excited smile playing on her lips and I squeezed my eyebrows at her. "You shouldn't, its very painful...," I told her. "And being the monster I am, I want to protect this princess from the pain...," I smiled but the smile turned sadder.

"Which I fail, always...," I completed my statement and her eyes saddened as she leaned to kiss my forehead.

"No you don't. You can never fail, Manik. You are the best thing that happened to me and no matter what I have been through, what we have been through, I would never want anything to change. Everyone we've been through has made us stronger, so strong that we're tied together with an invisible string. And this connection, will never break. Its just like our love. It's going to be with us, hamesha!" She smiled, her eyes twinkling again and I smiled too. It was weird yet beautiful how she could play with words and make them so perfect, just like she was- so perfect for me.

"Manik.... your concert...," she reminded me and I made a bored face. I didn't want to go, I wanted to stay with her, I wanted to continue what we were doing.

"I don't want to go!" I cribbed as I got up from her and she got up with me, giggling. There was no awkwardness between us with the sudden intimate moment we just shared, and we seemed to be just as comfortable as I took my shirt and made her wear it, as she pulled my face to hers, kissing my cheeks hardly.

"All the best Manik!" She smiled as she kissed my heart and I placed my lips on her crown. "Rock the stage again, rock star!" She smiled as she kissed our entwined hands before leaving them and I got up from my bed.

"I love you!" I confessed wearing my tee shirt as I she smiled at me from the bed in my shirt, looking as adorable and cute as forever.

"I love you more...!" She whispered back as I kissed her forehead before leaving and I didn't argue. Because I knew she said the truth. She loved me much more and selflessly then I can ever love her. And it's supposed to be this way. I'd love her a little less than she does and way more selfishly, so that no one can take her away from me- not even me myself.

I took the guitar in my hand as the crowd cheered harder but amongst the lakhs standing in front of me, the only person who mattered was the one sitting in the red short dress in the first row, her eyes peeping into mine.

She seemed better mentally as she laughed away with Navya on something, yet her eyes looked at me and I gave her a smile. She smiled back at me, flying a kiss and I winked at her.

This ones for you, Nandini.

I looked at my band mates who blinked at me in assurance and I took the mike. I smiled at her and she smiled at me too, my eyes locked at her all the time as I sang. We were three songs down already, and the crowd was going crazy as I ended the last song.

"The concert is not over guys... yet.", I announced to the crowd and there were cheers, everywhere. "There is a surprise song too!", and everyone cheered.

"And this song is dedicated to someone sitting right here, to someone who isn't just my love, but my life. To someone who promised to never leave me, to never give up on me. To the person whom I love the most and promise to do the same, till my last breaths," I said and there was pin drop silence everywhere. "This ones for you, Nandini!" I shouted and I could see the tears flowing off her eyes as Navya hugged her and she covered her mouth in shock.

"Tu aati hai seene mein
Jab jab saansein bharta hoon
Tere dil ki galiyon se
Main har roz guzarta hoon
Hawa ke jaisi chalti hai tu
Main ret jaise udta hoon
Kaun tujhe yoon pyar karega
Jaise main karta hoon

Tu jo mujhe aa mili
Sapne hue sarphire
Haathon mein aate nahi
Udte hain lamhein mere
Meri hasi tujhse
Meri khushi tujhse
Tujhe khabar kya beqadar
Jis din tujhko na dekhun
Pagal pagal phirta hoon
Kaun tujhe yoon pyaar karega
Jaise main karta hoon"

There was pin drop silence in the entire crowd and I blinked at my friends as they came ahead.

"Nandini Murthy, will you marry me?", I shouted and she got up from her seat, almost crying.

"because you are the shining armour of his life!" Aliya smiled. "Because you promised to never give up on him," Dhruv added. "Because you love me more than him!", Cabir announced proudly showing me his tongue and the entire crowd rolled their eyes at him. And trust me, he deserves that. "Because you will shine for him, humesha!", Mukti completed.

"Humesha!", I repeated behind her, meaning every word they said and I said, hamesha.

"Will you like to be his wife?", they all shouted together and she just smiled and cried at the same time looking at me.

"I will love to be.....," she answered everyone, her voice breaking at the end as she looked back at me, smiling.

".....his wife!", her eyes looked into mine and in that moment, we both knew we had found our own humesha.

True love isn't found, it is built by one conversation, one kiss, and one step at a time. It can't be rushed at, it can't be held forever. It just happens, slowly and beautifully.

~•~