I climbed out of my warm bed and looked over at the sleeping Y/N. I smiled warmly and walked out of our room and into Sarah's room. I sat down on her bed and placed my hand on her shoulder. 

"Sarah, it's time to wake up." I said. She didn't move. 

"Sarah?" I shook her shoulder harder. She still didn't move. 

"Sarah please wake up I understand you're tired but you need to wake up," I kept speaking but she still didn't wake up. 

"Sarah?" I flipped over her body and put my head on her chest, checking for a pulse. There was no pulse. 

  This has to be a dream, this has to be a dream, this has to be a dream 

  I chanted the words in my mind over and over again but every time I checked, there was no heartbeat. I could feel the wet tears welling up in my eyes, blurring my vision. They slowly slid down my face leaving tear stains. 

"Sarah...please." I whispered, taking her small fragile hand in mine. She was cold as ice. Sarah was always pale but now, she actually does look like a ghost. 

"Sam what's wrong?" I heard Y/N say from behind me. 

"She's..." I couldn't seem to find my words, all I could do was stutter. 

"Sarah?" 

"She's gone Y/N, there was nothing we could do." I whispered. My wet tears flew off my face and landed on the blankets that were supposed to keep Sarah warm. I turned my head to look at Y/N who's hand was clamped over her mouth as tears rolled down her face. Y/N slowly walked over me and I held out my arms to her. She hugged me tightly and cried onto my shoulder. 

  I lifted up Sarah's body and held her in my arms, crying softly into her hair. I stroked her soft black hair. It's gotten so long since Y/N and I adopted her. It was so short when we found her and now it's halfway down her chest. I wish it could get longer but it never will, she's dead! Forever gone! 

  Why is it every little girl I've ever cared about dies and leaves my life? First Baylee and now Sarah..

  "H-how do we tell Maria?" 

  Those words still haunt me to this day. 

"Tell me what?" I heard Maria say. My lips trembled as I looked up from Sarah's figure and saw a confused Maria standing in the doorway. 

"M-Maria, come here." Y/N ordered, stuttering on her words. She couldn't find her words like me. Maria slowly walked over and her expression changed in an instant when she saw Sarah's lifeless body in our arms. 

"S-Sarah.." She whispered. 

  She slowly started to walk towards Sarah and hold out her hand to stroke her hair. 

"Don't touch her!" I shouted. I regretted those words so much. If I had never said those words, maybe things would be different. Maybe I wouldn't be telling this story now. Maybe I wouldn't have gone through hell and back. 

More tears welled up in Maria's eyes and she ran out of the room. Y/N stood up and slapped my face, hard. I moved my hand to where she hit me but before I could say anything, she was running out of the room after Maria. 

"Daddy! Come play with me!" Sarah's bubbly voice echoed throughout the house. Y/N was asleep upstairs, she's been really tired from being pregnant. And Maria was also sleeping with her, she had gone out with me earlier to go hunting so she was off snoozing. 

"Okay Sarah," I laughed. 

  I walked over to Sarah and she handed me a dirty wooden doll. 

"This is Sally! Take good care of her!" Sarah ordered, smiling brightly at me. Her two front teeth were slowly growing back in, turning into adult teeth. 

  At that moment I immediately thought of Baylee and when she always asked me to play with her. 

"Baylee?" I whispered. 

"What is it big brother?" 

  I looked at Sarah surprised but she was setting up a small tea set on the floor. 

  Am I hearing things? 

    I guess I sometimes wonder if Baylee's soul is inside Sarah, they're so alike. But that's impossible. I'm just hearing the things I want to hear. I see Baylee in Sarah but Sarah is her own person. She's alive and in the pink. Unlike Baylee...


"Now they're both dead." I whispered to myself. 

  I wrapped Sarah up in multiple blankets and carried her outside. I set her down on the dirty ground and grabbed a shovel, digging a deep hole. When it was big enough to fit Sarah I walked back inside and grabbed her Sally doll and a pillow. I placed the pillow down in the hole and then picked up Sarah next. I gently set her down in the hole and wrapped her up in the blankets. Tears were rolling down my face. Never did I think I would have to do this. The parent should always die before their child. I didn't give her the life she deserved. She was only three years old too. I picked up Sally and set it in her hands that were placed neatly on her chest. I closed her eyelids and climbed out of the hole. I grabbed the shovel and started pouring the dirt back over her. I felt sick doing this. Y/N should be here with me but I know she would just be a sobbing mess. And besides, I can't stand to look at her. Looking at her reminds me I failed. I failed. I failed to protect her. I failed to keep her healthy. I failed to keep her safe. She's dead now because of me. I should've sent her inside. She would've been warmer, I should've forced the doctor to give her the medicine she needed. I could've gone in debt to him, I don't care how much it would've cost. I failed to keep my promise. My promise...
 
   "And that's the story of how Sarah died. But the story doesn't end more. Oh there's more. And believe me, it gets worse. This is the middle of my visit to hell. It's nowhere near it's end. As I tell you this now, I'm starting from the beginning. I want to just tell you what I am right now but, that'll just spoil the story. It's not long from now, the story is almost finished. When I am done, I'm saying goodbye forever. Thank you for staying this long and hearing my story. I hate myself for breaking my promise." 


  ~Lila W.