'Trust your heart if the seas catch fire, live by love though the stars walk backward.'

-E.E. Cummings
***

Bradford Estate;

Sleep alluded Averey for yet another hour. He turned restlessly in his bed, trying in vain, to get his mind off the strange behaviour that his brother had showcased. He had never seen Bran so unnerved.

Even Robert had seen through his feeble attempts of hiding the worry in his eyes. Averey had had to intervene on Bran’s behalf to dispel his younger brother’s doubts.

Even after trying multiple times, he had been unable to gather the reason behind it. But he knew it had to do something with Emma. She had been the one visiting Bran before them. What had transpired between them, had evidently not been something pleasant.

The thought had kept him awake for the most part of the night. Now, he found himself too restless to stay confined in the chamber and decided to have a stroll to freshen up his mind.

It was then, as he made his way through the hall, that he heard the shatter of glass, followed by a distinctive cry of anger.

Averey followed the sound and entered the library, only to stop abruptly as he took in the alarming sight before him. The only light in the library emanated from a single candelabra, holding no more than three candles, and situated on the corner table.
Brandon’s figure, hardly visible, was slouched in a chair opposite the door. He held a tumbler of liquor in one of his hands, the base almost touching the ground; shards of glass surrounded the wall beside him.

Averey took cautious steps towards him, trying to gauge his reaction. Brandon gave no indication of acknowledging his presence, keeping his gaze fixed on the floor.

“Bran…What is wrong? And do not try to refute this time. This is not you. What has happened?”

Averey’ face scrunched up with worry as he gently pulled the tumbler away from his brother’s hold.

Brandon raised his eyes to him, causing Averey to gasp. His eyes were rimmed red and glazed.

“I am pathetic, brother.”

His hollow voice echoed in the stillness of the library. Averey sucked in a startled breath as his frown deepened.

“What? Why are you saying that? Of course, that is not true.”

A ghost of a smile crossed Brandon’s face, though there was hardly any warmth in it. He sighed deeply and went to stare back at the floor.

“You would not be saying that if you knew what I have done.”

Averey leaned forward as he spoke pleadingly,

“Then tell me! Is it something to do with… Emma?”

Brandon’s gaze snapped up to him as soon as the words were out of his mouth. His face confirmed Averey’s suspicions.

“How…”

“I saw her on my way here. Did something happen?”

Brandon’s pained expression elevated Averey’s worry.
Had something happened to Emma? Was she sick?

Before Brandon could answer his question, they were interrupted by a commotion outside the library.

In the very next moment, Averey found himself facing his father’s livid face. His confusion at his sudden, unexpected arrival, only increased, when he saw Emma’s father behind him.

In that second, the horrible thought- that something had indeed happened to Emma, crossed his mind, and Averey’s heart clenched painfully.

“Father, what are-"

His words were soon drowned by the visceral animosity of his brother’s voice,

“What are you doing here?”

Zachary’s jaw clenched with anger as he saw the pathetic state of his son. A single look at him was enough to confirm the accusations that Hamond had laid against him.

“I am here because you left me no other choice.”

Zachary knew that he was not welcome here. He himself, had seldom visited the Bradford Estate, despite being its Lord; preferring to conduct his duties from the Hayworth Estate itself.

It had always reminded him of Saya and the promise he had made to Lord Bradford on the day of his wedding.
Coming here had always been a cruel reminder of his sins.

Brandon stared at him for another moment, his eyes dark with hatred, before he noticed the presence of the other man.

Averey saw the sudden change in Brandon’s eyes as he took in the figure of Hamond Mortimer.
He knew from the fiery gaze that the older man was directing at Brandon, that the matter was indeed serious.

“Hamond here, has laid some serious allegations against you, Brandon. According to him, you are the father of the child that his daughter is carrying. Is it true?”

Averey felt the stroke of his words physically.
Whatever he had expected, this was far beyond it.
Emma was carrying Brandon’s child?

He immediately turned towards his brother, waiting for his reaction with a bated breath.
Perhaps this was why he had been like that; perhaps he was simply afraid of being a father.

Brandon was to be a father…that would mean that he himself, would soon be an uncle.
As much as the thought pleased him, there was a small part of him that felt a pang of hurt.
The thought of Emma carrying someone else’s child- that too, his own brother- caused an ache in his heart.

However, he was not going to let it overshadow his happiness. No. His brother was starting a family with the woman he loved; and he would not let anything stand in their way- not even himself.

“Why are you not answering?”

Averey was pulled out of the realm of his thoughts by the eerily calm voice of his father.

He frowned perplexedly as he glanced at Brandon’s stoic figure. Why was he not saying anything?

Averey knew Bran was angry with their father’s visit.
Was that the reason behind his silence? Perhaps he was too furious to speak.

“Bran, why-"

“Speak, Brandon. Is the child yours?”

Averey’s puzzled inquiry was interrupted by his father’s words.

He cast an incredulous look at Brandon when there were still no words from the other man.
Averey felt his mind coming to a horrific conclusion as his brother kept a blank face, staring ahead and refusing to meet his father’s eyes. 

He was not going to agree!

Averey could see his answer in his posture. It was a strange mix of defiance and defeat- one that he had never seen Bran don.
But why?

He loved Emma; Averey had witnessed the proof several times by his own eyes. There was also no doubt about Emma’s love for him.
Then what was stopping him from accepting it?

Zachary felt his disappointment grow by each second as he waited for Brandon to speak the words.
He already knew his answer; could see it in his eyes.
But it had not been something that he had anticipated. He could not fathom his own son doing something of this sort.

To abandon a girl like this, was dishonourable. And he brought up his sons to be honourable and just men. He had no doubt in Hamond’s words. the man had been right.
What distressed him was son’s refusal to own his mistake and do the right thing.

He would never refuse him anything. If he loved the girl, he would gladly marry them. It was the least he could do after all the hurt that he had caused. But until Brandon himself accepted the truth, his hands were bound. He could not do anything.

“Brandon?”

Averey saw Brandon swallow painfully. He heard his words even before he had uttered them.

“No.”

It was barely more than a whisper, but Averey heard it loud and clear.
No? Had he just refused to acknowledge his own child?

For Averey knew that he had to be lying.
Everything made sense now. This had been the reason Emma had come to meet him here. This was why he had been so miserable all day, instead of being exhilarated like he should have been.

Averey realised that he must have already rejected the child. He must have told Emma the same.

He felt pain slice through him as he imagined her anguish.
She must have been devastated!
And now, this? Was he so blatantly going to stamp upon her honour? For what? Some skewed need to punish himself and those who loved him?

Hamond Mortimer’s protesting cry rang in the library,

“You are lying! How could you? I know she came to see you this morning!”

Zachary shut his eyes with defeat. He knew Brandon was lying. He was his father, after all. But he also knew that if he forced him to accept it, he would probably lose him forever. He had already refused his proposal of marriage once before. This time, after all that had happened in the past year, he could not do that.

Finally, he made one last effort. If his words did not have their intended effect, nothing else would.
He straightened himself and adopted an unfeeling tone.,

“I hope you are right. I had already told Hamond that his daughter was probably lying.”

He turned to Hamond, trying to keep the guilt out of his voice, as he addressed the aghast man,

“See, Mortimer. I told you, my son would never do something like that. I do not care what you have heard, or what your daughter tells you. If she is carrying a child, it does not have our family’s blood. You may do whatever you want…send her to the convent or get rid of the child. It is your choice.”

Averey gasped at his father’s words.
Send her off to a convent? But then she would be forever separated from her family- and her child. Oh, Emma! She would never be able to survive like that!

He cast a desperate, pleading glance at Brandon. He wondered how he had managed to remain unaffected by those cruel words. How could he care so little about the woman he claimed to love?

But Brandon did not occur a word. His face, almost inanimate with the tightness of his features and the hollowness of his eyes, remained stuck in the same position as before.

Averey knew his brother’s stubbornness and irrational defiance. He knew that he would never be able to persuade him, no matter how hard he tried to.

But he could not let Emma be separated from her own child, not when she had no fault in any of this. And before he knew, the words were out of Averey’s mouth in a rush,

“It was me!”

Zachary turned a questioning glance at his son.

“What do you mean?”

Averey turned his eyes momentarily at Brandon, imploring one last time.
But when he saw him swallow the lump in his throat and turn his haunted eyes away from him, he faced his father with a firm expression.

“It was me Emma had come to visit. I had told her that I would be visiting here today. She knew where to find me.”

Zachary frowned as he saw the determined look in Averey’s eyes. He could not fathom the reason behind his action.
Why was he doing this?

“Averey-"

“No, father. I am telling you the truth. It was me Emma had come to meet. B-Bran did not speak anything because it was me.”

“You mean to say that it is your child that my daughter is carrying?”

Hamond Mortimer’s words caused Averey to hesitate.
He should not be doing this. Not without Emma knowing…

He looked at Brandon again; waiting for him to interrupt him. But he soon realised the futility of his hopes. With a shuddering breath, he faced Emma’s father and looked him straight in the eyes.

“Yes, it is my child.”

Hamond Mortimer’s face contorted with a mixture of anger and relief.

“My Lord, you heard you son! Kindly grant this poor man justice.”

Zachary clenched his teeth with frustration.
What could he say now?
There was no chance of refusing Hamond, for he had already given him his word. Moreover, how could he allow the man to get rid of his family’s heir?

Maybe this was all for the best…

He fixed his glare at Averey, but his son refused to meet his gaze.
He left him no other choice.

“Are you speaking the truth, Averey?”

“Yes, father.”

“Very well then. Be prepared. You are to be wed at the end of the week. It will be just like a wedding should be. No one is to know about the circumstances surrounding this, except for the ones in here. I expect you to be at the Hayworth Estate by this afternoon. Leave as soon as you can.”

Zachary cast a last glance at Brandon and Averey before storming out of the library, a relieved Hamond Mortimer following close behind.
__________________________________

No sooner had the two men left, than Averey found himself pinned to the wall, his nightshirt bunched in Brandon’s fist.

“What the hell are you trying to achieve?”

Bran’s fuming voice hit his face as he struggled against his vice-like grip.

“Bran! What are you doing?”

Averey’s own voice wasn’t devoid of anger and disappointment at his brother’s actions.

“Was this what you had planned all along?”

Brandon’s voice lowered down to a menacing whisper and Averey’s brow furrowed with confusion.

“What in the Lord’s name are you trying to say?”

Brandon scoffed and pressed him further against the wall, causing Averey to grunt with the pain.

“You know very well, dear brother. I have seen the way you look at Emma. I had suspected your feelings for her a long time back. You were waiting for the right moment- and viola!  She was handed to you on a platter!”

Averey held his breath as Brandon’s breath hit his face. He reeked of liquor. His boorish words were a clear indicative of his loss in judgement.

“You do not know what you are saying, Bran.”

Averey tried to keep his anger in check. Brandon was not thinking rationally.

“Oh, really? Then, you do agree that you have not been crafting ways to have her all for yourself?”

Averey finally found his restraint slipping. He glared at him with pure contempt and spoke out vehemently,

“No. And if you had done, what you were supposed to do, I would never have had to say that. Had you accepted the truth instead of acting like a coward, we would have been celebrating the news of your wedding right now. But, no! You did not!
Why, Bran? How could you do this to Emma? Do you have any inkling of what this would do to her?
How would you ever be able to face her after she comes to know that your refused to acknowledge your love for her?”

“That is between me and her.”

Brandon’s voice was masked with impatience as he spit out the words.

“It had been. But now, a child is also involved. Did you hear what father said? They were going to separate her from her child- your child! Do you think she could live with that? Could you live with that?”

Brandon’s vein pulsed as he struggled to contain his emotions.

“I thought as much. You would never be able to forgive yourself, Bran. I do not know why you’re doing this. But there is still time. Tell the truth. You just have to own it. It is not too late, brother. I am not here to separate you and Emma. I promise I would step away as soon as you come forward to accept your responsibility. Do not crush her faith in you and your love, Bran.”

Brandon stilled as he heard Averey’s words.

He had no right to accuse his brother; not when he was the reason behind all that was happening.

Averey had asked him to step forward…could he do that?

He could feel himself be engulfed in flames of shame and regret. His interaction with his father, and his inability to speak the truth, were even more evidence of how undeserving he was of the love of someone as sweet as Emma.

For, when he had seen his father in front of him, he had lost the little reasoning he had left.
The only thought on his mind had been his immense hatred for the man, and his anger at his visit to the place that had been his mother’s home.
Emma had not even crossed his mind.

It was only when he had seen her father, that he was reminded of the reason he had been inebriating himself. The liquor however, had failed to provide him with the reprieve he was seeking. When his father demanded the truth, he had felt the inescapable need to defy him.

Preserving Emma’s honour, or even the future of his own child, had seemed less important in the face of the contempt that he felt for that man. He had let his rancour take over him completely, not budging even when his father revealed the dreadful decision of sending Emma to the convent.

Was that not evidence enough that he was not right for her?
What sort of a man was he?
Even in the face of a situation where she needed him the most, he had let his darkness speak for him.
And no matter how much he wanted to blame his state of insobriety on the lack of morality that he had displayed a few moments earlier, he knew it was his own fault- just like everything else.

And now, when his brother had stepped up to do the righteous thing, something that he should have done, he was blaming him? Brandon’s shoulders drooped as he realised his folly.

Averey’s features softened when he saw the storm brewing in his brother’s eyes. He knew he had to be equally hurt.

“Bran, I do not know why you are acting like this, but this is not who you are. Please gather your wits. Do what you need to, before it is too late. Just know that I am not going to allow your indecision and cowardice to ruin Emma’s life. She does not deserve this.”

Averey gave a final tug on Brandon’s hand, freeing himself of his grasp, before leaving with heavy steps.
__________________________________

Mortimer’s Residence;

Emma blanched as she heard her father’s words.
A wedding? With Averey?

Her throat clogged as she struggled to swallow past the dryness.

“You should have told me the truth. I made a fool out of myself in front of Lord Hayworth, accusing his eldest when it was Averey Hayworth all along! It was a good thing that the boy decided to speak the truth. I had almost given up after Brandon Hayworth’s refusal.”

Emma gaped at him, unable to grasp the meaning behind his words.
Brandon had declined his child in front of her father?

She felt her anger and humiliation bubble through her veins. He really had the audacity to do that?
And to think that she had once trusted him with everything!

Her mind went back to the matter at hand- Averey had lied. But why? Why was he trying to save her from this situation?

She had always known that he had a kind heart. But for him to go to this extent… It must be to hide his brother’s mistake.
Yes, that would make sense.

Perhaps, Brandon had talked him into agreeing to do this. He had easily parcelled his own responsibility upon his brother; how ideal for him!

She shook her head in resentment.
Did Brandon ever really love her? Or had it all been just a figment of her imagination?

It was no use debating upon that now, though; for, she had other, more pressing matters at hand.

Could she be desperate enough, to exploit Averey’s kindness? Her mind replayed the conversation she had had with her father the day before, and she knew that she was.

The mere thought of being separated from her child, was unbearable. She could not help but love the life growing inside of her. She could not let her stupidity and mistakes to affect an innocent baby.

No, if Averey was willing to offer her a chance to save her child’s life, she would not hesitate to accept it.
She would block all thoughts of the man who fathered this child.

Brandon had made his decision.
He had decided to abandon them. But she would never abandon her child. She would risk everything in her power to provide him the life that he deserved- even if it meant destroying her own happiness.

She would not dwell anymore on the reason behind Averey’s lie; neither would she let her guilt consume her. She would be grateful towards him for as long as she lived.

Emma pressed a gentle hand against her abdomen as tears trickled down her face.

Her father sighed as he looked at her stricken expression.

“I do not understand why you are behaving so poorly, Emma. You should have thought about the consequences before frolicking around with that boy. Now, I forbid you to exit this house till the day of your wedding. I will not have my family face another disparagement, in case the matter becomes public knowledge.”

Emma’s mother cast a sympathetic glance at her daughter, not daring to refute her husband’s words.

Emma did not care anyway. She was too tired to protest. All she hoped for, was a good future for her child.
She was ready to do anything for that; even if that meant letting go of Brandon Hayworth…
__________________________________

Hayworth Estate;

“You do know that it cannot be true, don’t you?”

Scarlet’s dry tone caused Zachary to sigh exasperatedly.

Yes, he knew it was not; but in the circumstances, he could barely think of any other way. His wife’s accusing glance was doing little to calm his distress.

“It does not matter.”

Scarlet wrung her hands as she held them in front of her. She had not had much expectations when she decided to confront him. But this was her son’s life. She knew she could not keep quiet any longer.

She made her way inside the parlour, shutting the door behind her. Zachary did not glance up from the register in front of him. Her presence had never been welcomed in his vicinity, since the better part of the last two years.
Ever since Lady Margaret’s death, she herself had been reluctant to be in her husband’s company. The only reprieve seemed to be in the fact that he himself was not keen of hers.

The news she had received upon his arrival from the Bradford Estate, however, had compelled her to overlook her own discomfort and seek the answers that she desired.

“What do you mean? How can it not matter? You know Averey would never do that! He is your son, Zachary; you know him.”

Zachary seemed to hesitate for a second before he looked up at her,

“I know. But as I said before, it does not matter. Emma is carrying our family’s heir. We cannot disown the child. This is the best option. Averey is willing to marry her. What would be the harm in this?”

Scarlet glared at him incredulously.

“The harm? How could you say that? You know Averey is simply trying to mask Brandon’s lie! This makes no sense. Why should he shoulder the responsibility of a child that isn’t even his? I have no problem with Emma being marrying into our family, or us accepting the child. What I do have a problem with, is the manner in which you are trying to achieve this.
Have you even considered the girl? What if she doesn’t want to marry our son?”

“She has little choice. This is the only option she has.”

Zachary’s dispassionate tone caused Scarlet to shake her head in frustration.

“And what about their life?
Do you not care that they might not be happy with this marriage? It would be a marriage of convenience, Zachary. She is carrying his brother’s child, for Lord’s sake! How could you expect Averey to live with her, knowing that she loves his own brother? How would it be fair for any of them?”

Zachary quelled the guilt that was bubbling up to the surface. No, he had no other choice.

Scarlet fumed at her husband’s silence. She could not bear to see this any longer.

“So, you are going to ruin both of their lives, simply to appease your eldest son?”

Zachary’s gaze snapped to hers. She almost backed away as she saw the flash of warning in them. But decided to continue in a vehement tone,

“I care for Brandon too, Zachary. Whether you believe it or not, I do. But this does not mean that I would be willing to overlook his mistakes. What he did was wrong. It is he, who should be taking the responsibility of his actions.
Perhaps he is bitter and confused at the moment. He is just a boy. It is understandable. Ask him again. Do anything! But please do not let him make this mistake. He will forever blame you for this.
Do you think he would be happy seeing Emma and his child with Averey? I know you are simply too afraid of facing his disappointment and hatred. In order to appease him now, you are sacrificing the happiness of your other son. Please rethink your decision, Zach!”

Zachary’s glare turned icy as her words hit their mark.

She was right. He was too afraid to face Brandon’s anger.
He had already hurt him so much. How could he ever demand him to do something against his will?
Did he have the right to force his decision upon him?
No, he did not.

He knew this was unfair to both Averey and Emma. He also knew that Brandon would be just as hurt by this. But he would rather take the easy way.

If he had forced Brandon to marry Emma, even after he refused to acknowledge the truth, his own son would have been proved a liar and philander.
Would Brandon ever have forgiven him for that humiliation? Never!

He also knew that his son was hell bent on opposing his decisions. It would have been no use forcing him into this marriage.
He might have made his own life, as well as that of the girl, a misery- just to spite him.
He would have forced himself to hate her, just to prove his father’s decision wrong.

Zachary knew his son.
He saw himself in him. For, no matter how much he hated him at the moment, the truth remained that he was more like him than any of his other children.
He carried the anger and defiance that Zachary had once carried in his own heart.

No, he was not going to let his son ruin that girl’s life like he had ruined his mother’s.
Emma would be better married to Averey, than to Bran. She would not become another Saya.

He had seen something in Averey’s eyes last night. He had seen warmth and fierceness in them. It was not hard to decipher his affection for the girl. The way he had taken the blame and defended her honour, was evidence enough of his ability to love her eventually.

Zachary knew that they all would hate him for his decision. He had accepted that. It was better than to see them destroy their lives.

If he is accused of favouring one of his son’s over the other, then he was ready to face that criticism.

“I do not care what you think, Scarlet. Averey has accepted this decision. I have already given Hamond Mortimer, my word. You should stop worrying about it and start making the preparations for the wedding. Nobody should doubt our excitement. This is supposed to be a merry occasion.”

Scarlet flushed as she stooped her protestations. She knew it was no use.

Taking a deep breath, she nodded sharply and made her way out of the parlour, leaving Zachary frowning at the register in his hands.
__________________________________

Author's Note-

*Surprise!*

Hello to all my wonderful readers!

So, I know that you must be confused by this sudden update. But I have decided to challenge myself. (Haha)

I wondered, if I could handle one deadline, why not try making it two days a week?

Why, you ask?

Because I am a masochist. 💁
I like torturing myself. 🤓

I am going to see if I can keep this up.
So, there would be 2 updates a week- Sunday and Thursday.
You guys keep me motivated!

Also, what do you think of the update?
There’s a lot going on!

Brandon is being… well, Brandon.
Who knows what goes on in his mind?
He is having some triple, quadruple thoughts.
I wish I could go there and tell him to curb his doubts!😔

Now, Emma is being practical. She knows what is best for her and her child.
Do you think she is making the right decision?

And what is there in Averey’s future?

Do you agree with Zachary’s decision?

Let us wait and see what the future has in hold for these three…

Till the next time!👋