THE VULNERABILITY

I put you on top, I put you on top.
I claimed you so proud and openly, babe.
But when times were rough, when times were rough,
I made sure I held you close to me.
So call out my name.

***

CHAPTER XIX

*****

THE CLOSER WE got to Daniel's house, the more I began to dread what I was about to do. I knew Diego wasn't going to last any longer than a couple days in his hands. That was the least of my worries. Looking Diego in the eye would be like staring right at my trauma, facing it head on.

I had gotten better over the last two years. I was no longer having panic attacks in the middle of crowded spaces and the nightmares had eased up in the last six months, but I didn't know how I was going to react in front of Diego. Things like this weren't predictable and I wasn't ready to break down in front of everybody because that would make me vulnerable and I hated being vulnerable.

The car pulled up into gates of the house and with a small sigh, I stepped out into the cool breeze. Jorge came out from the driver's seat and slammed the door close for me as if I couldn't do it myself. I gave him a small, confused smile before going to the other side of the car and opening the door.

With gentle hands, I reached in and brought Mateo out of his car seat, rubbing his back so he wouldn't wake up. Jorge helped me close that door too before running ahead of me to the front door and knocking on it.

By the time I had reached, it had already been swung open, revealing Anna's familiar face. “Is everything alright?” she asked as I walked past her into the house. “Pablo told me I should open the door for you. What's the problem?”

“Nothing, Anna,” I muttered, making my way towards Daniel's room before stopping and turning to her. “Actually, can you put Mateo in bed? Take him to Daniel's room?”

She stared at me for a couple seconds, her eyes analysing my dishevelled appearance before nodding her head and taking Teo from my arms. He whimpered in his sleep from the constant disruptions, but thankfully stayed unconscious as Anna began walking in the direction of Daniel's room.

I willed myself to begin walking in the direction of the basement where they were most likely holding Diego. I knew the longer I stood there, the lower the chances of me sticking through with my plan became.

The journey to the basement wasn't as long as I would have hoped it would be, and much too soon the sounds of groans and grunts of pains rang louder and louder in my ear. It bounced of the walls as if taunting me with the bitter memories of the man who had played a part in ruining my life two years ago.

I knew I wasn't particularly happy back then, but at least I wasn't suffering on a cargo ship with no hopes of a future.

I gulped, pushing the troubling thoughts to the back of my mind as I came face to face with a large metal door. The door that kept me away from one of the man that haunted my dreams for the longest time. I couldn't let my irrational fear get in the way of what was going to happen, but my heart felt like it was about to beat out of my chest and I had no control over it.

I decided then that it didn't matter. With a shaky hand, I exerted all of my power into pushing the door open and allowing myself into the room.

The first thing my eyes lay on was a single figure tied to a chair which was nailed to the ground. The man was beaten and bruised with dried blood smeared all over his face and soaked into his clothes. He was hunched over himself, the grunts and groans I was hearing previously now much louder and accompanied by little whimpers.

Little pathetic whimpers.

I couldn't help but tilt my head to the side, my eyes analysing the large figure while I used my hand to hold the door open. I knew as soon as it slammed shut, all three people in the room with me would be alerted of my presence. I didn't want that. Not yet. I wanted to have a quiet moment to go over my position; I wanted to have the upper hand. I called the shots.

It was hard for me to believe that the man sitting in the middle of the room was really Diego. Maybe it was just a trick of the light. The room had four stone walls and a single, dim light bulb hanging in the middle of the ceiling which surely made it difficult to see anything.

Yet I was absolutely certain. How could I forget the man that had so easily ripped me out of my home and destroyed my life? The man that had taken my spirit into his hands and stomped on it with a stupid smirk on his face? I couldn't.

The man that was sitting in front of me was Diego and I loved the fact that it was. It was rather satisfying to watch his downfall really. Someone who had held himself with so much grace was now on the verge of pleading for his life.

I slipped my hand away from the door, letting the large metal slam shut and alert all the men in the room of my presence. They all snapped their heads up in perfect order, bringing a small smirk to my face.

Daniel and Pablo shared a look, but exchanged no words before Pablo focused his attention on Diego.

“You're not blind,” Pablo began talking, his rich Spanish accent really leaping out. He walked closer to Diego who kept his eyes trained on me with his mouth agape like a fish out of water. “Who is this woman to you?”

“W-What am I doing here?” he questioned, turning to Pablo with pleading eyes. Of course, Pablo wasn't having any of it and instead gripped his hair, forcing him to keep his eyes trained on me.

“I asked you a question,” he hissed, tugging on Diego's hair, making him let out grunts of pain that were promptly ignored. “Who is this woman to you?”

“One of boss' whores,” he answered, making Pablo lift his arm and send a painful punch into his right cheek. Diego let out a low laugh which was quickly overtaken by a short coughing fit before he turned back to me with a twinkle in his eyes. From the looks of it, he had dropped the innocent facade. “One of his finer prostitutes as well.”

For that he was punished with another punch to his right cheek, but his response was just as carefree as before. He spat some blood out of his mouth, right at my feet making me take a step towards the door.

“One of you must be her fiancé then?” he said, looking between Pablo and Daniel with a smirk on his face. “No hard feelings, dude. I was just following orders.”

“And look where your orders got you,” Daniel spoke up for the first time, effortlessly commanding everyone's attention to him.

Diego rolled his eyes and tilted his head to the side. “I didn't think you knew how to speak,” he laughed, his eyes twinkling before he set them on me. “And you,” he addressed to me, making me raise an eyebrow, “can you no longer talk? Two years ago, you were very vocal about how much you wanted me.” He smirked at the disgusted look on my face. “Now it's almost as if you're too scared to.”

“The only thing I want is your dead body—”

“Necrophilia is illegal, babe.”

“—And the only thing I'm scared of is the disease I might catch being in the same room as you,” I hissed, narrowing my eyes as he just laughed at my words.

“I have a disease?” he laughed, “you're the one who's been sleeping with different men every night. You're the whore here—”

“Tu madre es a whore.”

“And so what if she is?” he asked, smiling at the fact that he had successfully riled me up. “At least she isn't being forced into it like you were.”

“Would you like that to change?” I asked, tilting my head to the side with a small pout on my lip.

I didn't mean anything I was saying. There was no way I was even going to begin thinking about possibly torturing anybody else, but I found in that moment that I was willing to do anything to put the bastard in his place. Even if I made false promises that I had no intentions of holding up for the good of the world we lived in.

And maybe I should've learnt my lesson. Maybe I should've learnt not to say the shit I said, but I didn't. An unfamiliar high surged through my blood stream at the look of fear on his face and the way his eyes narrowed in warning at me.

For once, I was finally beginning to chip away at his tough-guy exterior and it felt good. Finally, I had the upper hand.

“Don't you dare even think about involving her in this,” he warned, all humour disappearing from his tone. “That woman has nothing to do with this. She's innocent.”

I raised an eyebrow, a mischievous smirk falling onto my lips at the sight of him. With calculated movements, I began walking closer to him, only stopping once I was right in front of him. Before I had stepped in, I was afraid, but now it had changed.

I found a weak spot in him and like a predator, I was using it to deliver every attack. Leaning down until my face was directly in front of his and my hands were balanced on his thigh, I couldn't help but feel powerful in that moment. Diego used to be a high and mighty image in my memories. Someone I feared, but now he looked at me with great fear.

It was either he had gotten weaker since I last saw him... or I had gotten a lot more powerful.

“Daniel?” I called out without breaking eye contact with Diego.

“Mi amor?”

I knew he was only saying it for show, but there was something about the way he spoke that sent my heart lurching in my chest. Maybe it was his low, deep voice or the fact that when he had called me his love, it almost sounded like he meant it.

Or maybe I was just dwelling on it too much.

“What's the name of his mother?” I asked, making Diego's eyes widen in fear at the implications of my question. If Daniel actually knew who his mother was and where to locate her, then he was severely fucked if he cared about her.

Not that we actually had any plans to harm the poor woman, but he didn't need to know that.

“Mathilde.” My eyes flicked up at the sound of his voice, seeking out his gaze and instantly meeting it. “Rosemary Mathilde Gonzalez-Rodriguez. More commonly known as Mathilde.”

“Fuck you,” Diego suddenly hissed, spitting blood right on my shirt. I took a step back and stared at his angry face with surprise. “Don't you dare lay a finger on her or else—”

Before he could finish his sentence, I had raised my hand and slapped him across the cheek as hard as I could. The power of the slap sent his face in the other direction as the high-pitched sound echoed around the room. My hand burnt, but not as bright as the red hand-mark that was beginning to form on his cheek and just the sight of it alone made the pain I felt worth it.

“You think you're in a position to give me orders, imbécil?” I laughed, showing that he had no affect on me. “Now, here's how it'll go,” I grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at me as I spoke, “we ask you questions and you answer them. If you lie or withhold information, we punish you,” I patted the red handprint on his cheek and smiled as he hissed in pain, “and then we go after your precious madre too. Entiendes?”

“Go fuck yourself!”

“I'll take that as a yes,” I smiled, turning to Pablo. “Shall we begin?”

“We shall. Let's start easy,” Pablo said, crossing his arms over his chest. “The name of the man that was with you in the hospital.”

***

“What are you going to do now?”

“Look for his accomplice at the hospital,” Pablo answered before bringing the blunt we were sharing to his lips and taking a hit. “Fabio.”

By now we were sitting outside, sharing a single joint between the three of us just to clear our minds. Diego was still alive, but lacked a couple teeth and fingers. Much of his blood drenched or clothes, more Pablo and Daniel than me since they did much of the dirty work, but neither of them seemed to be in a rush to change.

“I just find it odd that he knew nothing else,” I muttered under my breath, staring down at my hands in confusion. “Like he genuinely knew nothing.”

“It was the sane with Isaac,” Daniel said, contributing to the conversation for the first time since we left. I wasn't sure if I was just high or if his voice genuinely sounded deeper. Unfortunately, his words had hit me before I could spend time dissecting the sound of his voice.

“What do you mean?”

“Isaac didn't speak about his boss, because he didn't know his boss,” Daniel elaborated, taking a puff of the joint before handing it to me. I handed it straight to Pablo because the last thing I needed was to be high with a child.

Mateo deserved at least one sober parent tonight.

“We interrogated him before we let you see him,” Pablo added, making me turn to him. “He never once talked about his boss. Only about the deal your father had with him.”

I stared at Pablo for a couple seconds, trying to add the pieces of information together. I felt like there was a much bigger picture that I couldn't see. A vital piece of information was missing and something deep in my bones made me feel like it would make all the difference. It was the single thing that linked me to whoever was after me.

“Do you think my father would know?” I asked, looking between Daniel and Pablo.

Pablo ran his hand through his hair and shrugged before throwing the blunt onto the floor and stepping on it. “I don't expect him to know anymore than Jacob, Isaac or Diego but you can always give it a shot.”

I turned to Daniel for confirmation, but he just shrugged his shoulder making me sigh and turn back to Pablo.

“You can decide on what you want to do tomorrow,” he said, making me nod my head. “As for right now, we should probably go to sleep.” He stepped closer to me and placed a small kiss on my forehead. “You did great tonight.”

“Goodnight, Pablo,” I muttered under my breath, letting myself bask in the feeling of having him with me once again after so long. It was moments like these that I never appreciated before, but now felt so much more special to me.

He pulled away seconds later and after exchanging a friendly head nod with Daniel, he turned away and made his way to his room.

After that, it was just Daniel and I standing in silence outside in the middle of the night with the dying embers of our blunt in the grass. I wanted to say so many things, but I couldn't find it in me to even acknowledge him. The silence around us was heavy and expecting, yet neither of us did anything to break it.

How had we got here?

Daniel bent down and picked up the stubbed out blunt before turning in the direction of the house.

“Come with me,” was his simple command with no explanation as to where we were going, yet I still found myself following after him. My gaze was trained on his back, watching the way his muscles flexed as he moved, pulling and pushing doors open and moving things out of his way.

I had no idea where he was taking us to and it wasn't something fully on my mind until he had swung open the door for his room and allowed us in. The small noises coming from my favourite child in the world had seemed to be the thing that broke me out of my trance, instantly bringing a smile to my face at the sight of Mateo sleeping in the middle of Daniel's bed with his stuffed dinosaur pressed tightly to his chest.

“Come on,” he whispered, tapping my palm before continuing in the direction of the bathroom.

I followed him, squinting my eyes at the warm glow of the light as soon as we entered. Daniel, seemingly unbothered by it, began rummaging through the cabinets until he pulled out a small grey washcloth.

I watched silently as he ran the material under warm water before he turned back to me. He let his eyes run over my entire body, washcloth still in his hand before meeting my eyes again.

“Take off your shirt?”

My heart beat faster at his request, my breath hitching in my throat. I knew he probably just wanted to clean me up, but I couldn't help but wonder if there was a little more to it.

I brought my hands to the hem of my shirt, hesitating because I knew if I took it off, I would be completely bare in front of him. I wasn't wearing anything else underneath - not even a bra.

Despite that, I raised the grey material over my body revealing more and more skin until I was finally pulling it over my head and chucking it on the bathroom floor.

Daniel let out a heavy breath, his eyes trained on my chest as I bit my lip. Without thinking about my words, I broke the silence.

“They say hi.”

He looked up from my breasts, his eyes shimmering with humour at my words. “Shut up,” he muttered before raising the washcloth to my body and gently wiping away the small splotches of blood I may have had on my skin.

His movements were delicate and gentle, seeming to linger the longest on my exposed breasts. My nipples were now rock solid in the cold and a jolt would travel down my spine every time he passed the washcloth over it. A part of me suspected he knew what he was doing but before I could bring it up, he had moved on. He paused a bit at the sight of the tiny tattoo I had just under my left boob, but said nothing about it.

His arms snaked around my waist, drawing me into his chest so he could get to my back. I doubted I had any blood on my back, but I wasn't going to tell him that because I savoured every minute I spent in his arms. I couldn't remember a time when he had been so gentle with me and held me like this. Now that I was experiencing it, I never wanted to leave.

I wanted to be in his arms forever.

I traced the small tattoo that decorated his neck before trailing my hand down to his biceps. His muscles tensed and relaxed at my touch and his heart beat rapidly in his chest, but none of us had uttered a word. For once, the silence was appreciated. It was beautiful.

“I'll get some clothes,” he said, drawing my attention away from my thoughts to him instead.

I nodded, unable to speak because the atmosphere surrounding us was thick and almost suffocating. As if feeling my discomfort, he slipped away from me and made his way out of the bathroom, leaving me alone to go over what had just happened.

He was different. He was so different and I didn't know how to feel about that. I placed my hand on my beating heart and winced at the pain that seemed to erupt from my chest.

Why was he acting the way he was acting? Why did it have such a huge affect on me? Why was I feeling all these weird things for him again?

Why wasn't he like this when we were together and all I wanted was his affection?

The sound of him stepping back into the bathroom broke me out of my thoughts. I looked away from the marble counter and found myself smiling at the sight of Mateo resting his head on Daniel's shoulder.

“I woke him up by accident,” he confessed, making the smile on my face get wider by the second. Teo only sucked on his thumb peacefully, the fact that he wasn't reaching for me the confirmation that he was tired enough to fall asleep in the next few minutes.

“It's fine,” I said, walking up to them both and taking the shirt in his hand. I quickly slipped it on before taking Mateo from him and holding him to my chest. “He'll probably fall asleep soon.” I smiled at him and slowly made my way out of the bathroom. “Goodnight, Daniel.”

He hadn't responded, but I allowed myself to believe that in his heart he did.

***

I woke up to an empty bed the next morning, yet before I could start worrying, the mystery of where Daniel and my son were was quickly solved. Sitting up, the first thing I laid eyes on was the sight of Daniel sitting shirtless in his armchair with Teo sound asleep on his chest.

I wiped the sleep out of my eyes before focusing on them again, my lips falling into a frown.

“Did you...” Daniel turned to me at the sound of my voice, his eyebrows raised in expectation, “did you get any sleep at all?”

“Some,” was his simple response, making my frown deepen.

I looked to the sheets beside me, noting the way they did look like they had been laid in. Did the three of us share a bed? Like a family?

I turned back to Daniel, slowing soaking him all in. I wasn't sure if this was the case with all men, but just watching the way Daniel handled Teo was making me feel some kind of way. I had never watched him interact with kids before so seeing him be so gentle with Mateo was a pleasant surprise to me.

Maybe it explained why he acted the way he did last night.

Teo smacked his lips together, successfully breaking the both of us out of whatever trance we were in as we watched him bury himself more into his father's chest. Daniel brought his hand to his back and rubbed him gently with the smallest of smiles on his face.

I found it so hard to believe that I was actually seeing this. It seemed like a special moment between father and son and I only felt like an intruder. A part of me was upset that it took so much to get Daniel to open up to me and yet it wasn't really me he was opening up to.

“He's gotten really fond of you lately,” I commented as I stretched out my limbs. He watched me silently, not tearing his eyes off of me even as I stepped out of bed. “You think he knows?”

“Knows what?”

“That you're his father.”

Daniel looked down at Teo who made another sound in his sleep before shrugging. “Maybe.”

I made my way over to them and crouched in front of Daniel before leaning in to place a small kiss on Teo's cheek. His immediate response was to pucker his lips in his sleep making me smile and kiss him again before pulling away.

His lips stretched out into what mildly resembled a smile and he quietly murmured 'mama' before going quiet in his sleep again. I made to get up after that, ready to start my day when I caught sight of something that made my stomach drop.

I finally realised why the necklace Daniel was wearing yesterday seemed so familiar to me. It was the medallion that I had gifted him two years prior. He still had it.

Against my better judgement, I traced my fingers up his skin, past his endless tattoos until I had reached the rich metal that rested on his chest, closest to his heart. He said nothing as he watched me inspect the necklace. His eyes remained trained on my face, scrutinising my every feature as I took a quick trip down memory lane.

Even though it belonged to him, it meant so much to me that I found myself almost speechless that he still had. Grateful, nonetheless, because it meant the world to me. It meant, maybe, he felt something.

Or maybe that he just liked the way it looked.

“I have—”

“Daniel!” The door was swung open, the sheer force of it banging against the wall being enough to startle me away from Daniel and jolt Teo out of his sleep. A familiar brunette had walked into the room beaming until her brown eyes had focused on my startled form and the grin on her face began to slip. She tilted her head to the side and parted her lips in confusion. “Araceli?”

“Emma,” I smiled, standing up straight and dusting off the shirt I had on. “Long time.”

She stood in stunned silence, unable to tear her eyes away from me. I took the opportunity to admire her too. Pablo hadn't been wrong. It seemed like France had really done her a great wealth of good. Her skin had a healthy glow to it, her blue eyes shining brighter than I think I had ever seen them before.

Unfortunately, that hadn't been the only thing Pablo was right about. On her left hand around her her engagement finger was a diamond as cold as ice.

An engagement ring.

“Oh my God!” she squealed, practically lunging herself at me. “You don't understand how much I've missed you, Ara.” She pulled away from me, a wide smile on her face as she looked me right in the eye. “When they let me out of that place, they wouldn't tell me where you went no matter how much I asked for you,” she confessed. “I almost began thinking the worst, but Pablo...” she visibly faltered at the mention of Pablo, a frown taking over her features briefly before she shook her head and plastered on a smile I could tell had been forced. “He assured me you were okay.”

“And I'm glad you're okay,” I said, directing the conversation back to her as I leaned back to take another look. “You're literally glowing.”

“Please,” she waved a dismissive hand, “it's just the tan.” She opened her mouth to say more when something behind me seemed to have caught her attention. I turned around, realising that she had just noticed Mateo in the room for the first time. “Hello,” she cooed, “who are you?” Teo stayed quiet and stared at her with his usual curiosity, but Emma was picking up on what was happening pretty fast. She turned to Daniel and then to me before turning back to Daniel. “Hold on, why does he look like the mini version of you and Araceli?”

Daniel said nothing and only shrugged, making me roll my eyes at him. Of course he wouldn't tell his only sister that he had a son.

“You didn't tell her?”

“Did she ask?”

“Wait, wait. Are you trying to tell me that I'm an aunty?” she seemed to be going through a wide range of emotions at the one time as she stared at Mateo before finally letting out a squeal of happiness. She took him out of Daniel's lap and spun him around before holding him close to her. “Hello, nephew. I'm Emma. I'm your aunty.”

Teo said nothing and instead looked around the unfamiliar room as if that was more important than his estranged aunt standing right in front of him.

“Don't mind him,” I said, waving off his nonchalance at the situation. After all, he was just a child. “He just woke up so he's a bit grumpy right now.”

“At least someone values their beauty sleep as much as I do in this house,” she laughed, rubbing her nose against his and giggling as he scrunched his nose up. “What's his name?”

“Mateo.”

She turned to me with an eyebrow raised in shock. “Mateo?” she repeated, making me nod slowly. “Mateo as in Daniel Mateo Reyes?”

I glanced at Daniel who only joined he sister in looking at me, waiting for an answer. With a small laugh, I carefully took Mateo from her arms and placed him on the bed with his dinosaur. “Mateo,” I began, “as in my gift from God.”

Daniel was a reason why I named my son Mateo. I thought I would never see him again, so I wanted Teo to still have a way to be close with his father but after all that we had been through, I couldn't deny that he was also my gift from God. The fact that his father shared the same name was completely by chance and only pushed me to pick it for him more.

“I love it,” Emma said, bringing a small smile to my face. I didn't miss the way she glanced at Daniel who only kept his eyes on me with a humoured smirk on his face. “Anyway, You need to meet Pierre.” I tilted my head to the side at her words, but said nothing and let her continue. “He's my fiancé, you'll love him. Maybe we can schedule something if... you'll be around for that?”

I smiled and nodded my head, wanting to reassure her that I wasn't going to disappear like last time. “Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.”

She beamed. “That's great. You'll absolutely love him,” she said before wrapping me in a brief hug again. “I'm so happy that you're back, Ara. I hated the fact that I couldn't contact you.”

I gulped down my emotions and blinked, forcing a smile onto my fcce as I nodded. “I know. It was rough then, but we're going to make up for all the time we missed hanging out together.”

“Oh we have to,” she laughed before checking her phone at the sound of a notification coming in. She let out a sigh and turned to me. “I've got to go now, but I'll reach out later, okay? It was nice seeing you again, Ara.”

“You too,” I called after her before the door slammed closed after her exit. I turned to Mateo and watched as he crawled off the bed and ran towards Daniel's desk to mess with the pens and papers on it before turning to Daniel himself. “Can you take me home?”

He looked from Teo to me with a raised brow. “So soon?”

“Yeah.” I rolled my eyes and walked closer to him, not missing the smirk that grew on how face. “This place reeks of death.”

He let his eyes scan over my body shamelessly, lingering at my chest and hips before rolling his eyes and getting up. He made his way over to Teo and yanked him into his arms, making him giggle and reach for the desk even as Daniel walked away.

After a couple seconds of silence, he finally responded.

“I wonder why.”

*****

I think I singlehandedly squeezed more Spanish into this chapter than the whole of the last back lmao. If you spot any mistakes, please let me know. I'm nowhere near fluent in the language so don't be afraid to help a sista out.

Anyways, I delivered. I figured I owed it to yall because I missed like two updates. Also because writing has been going well for me lately and school closes tomorrow so yeah. Expect more frequent updates and surprises from now on.

For the person who asked if Daniel and Araceli are ever going to get back together, I hope you found your answer in this chapter lmao.

Anyways, see you guys on Saturday/Sunday. Stay hydrated and stay safe.