*unedited*

N A N D I N I

*flashback continues*

Manik.

The person I loved the most had betrayed me in a way I couldn't even imagine. I loved him, and the little infinity of love he gifted me was my kind of forever with him.

That late night dates under the stars, he cooking for me, making me eat, taking care of me, possessiveness, kissing me under the stars and then hugging me to sleep. This is what meets my definition of love, but I don't, really don't know about Manik.

Three days.

Yes it's been three days since what happened in my house and Aryamman and Cabir saw me kiss Manik. It's been three days since Manik Malhotra threatened to ruin me. It's been three days of me cutting myself from the world, staying at home, switching off my phone, not opening the door to anybody, nor speaking a word to anyone, nor eating, hardly drinking water. It's been three days of me living miserabley in my bed like a Home addict without me having heard from Manik.

And now is finally when I decided to get up, freshen up, and give life another chance. Things are already at it's worse and they couldn't get any more bad. They'd just get better from now on. I promised myself as I took a shower after three days.

I had this sudden urge to go to Malhotra Headquarters and smash Manik Malhotras head until he tells me Why is he playing this sick game, Why is he pushing me away this way, Why is he on purpose doing things that make me hate him.

It's been three days and I had to look a bit like a human from the mess I had created of myself so I decided to get into my plain blue ripped jeans with a black crop top and a grey long cardigan over it. I tied my hair in a bun and I finally looked human, smelling of fresh flowers.

I had loads of work to do, I had to find my phone in some corner of my house, apologise and sort things with Aryamman and Cabir and then consult Manik.

I know Manik loves me. I have seen it in his eyes, his care, his unintentional behaviour. The way he is possessive about me as if I am his own property, the way he can't sleep without hugging me, the way he got a nightmare that I was leaving him, the way he keeps kissing me. If this isn't love, then what is this?

Manik loves me. I reminded myself before putting on the smile on my face.

I found my phone thrown in the balcony and I wasn't surprised to check the inbox.

52 missed calls from Mukti.
101 missed calls from Aryamman.
97 missed calls from Cabir.
1 missed call from Manik.

509 new messages from Aryamman, Cabir, Mukti and three others.

I took a deep breath. I was answerable to all of them, I had to tell them where I was from three days, not even answering my house bells. I had to tell them which part of Earth had gobbled me up for three days.

Finally, I stepped out of house, being welcomed by light after three days.

It didn't take me a minute to realise that this wasn't sunlight, there were flashes that welcomed me.

Hundreds of reporters stood in front of my house, each camera flashing on my face, capturing each expression and each move of mine.

"How do you feel with all the new attention Ma'am?"
"What would you like to comment on you relation with Manik sir?"
"Are you just a bed warmer for him?"
"How do you react with Manik sir opening about you both?"

I stood there rooted to my place, my eyes wide in horror. My feet had turned cold and my body numb from this.

What the fuck was happening?

Ab Manik ne kya kiya?

"Please answer Nandini ji"
"How do you feel about yours and Manik's relation?"

They all surrounded me the same way they kept surrounding my mom and Dad. I closed my eyes and the memories came back as I could see my mom and Dad fighting.

I opened my eyes and let the saliva flow. I stood rooted to my place, not knowing how to react. My eyes were glued to the ground trying not to take in their hair

Just then I felt a hand on my waist but I wasn't able to look up and see who it was, to meet anybody's eyes.

"Are you his new bed warmer?"
"Is yours and Manik Malhotra's relation confines to the bed?"
"Are you a slut?"

I closed my eyes even tighter trying not to fall weak as the voices faded and I was dragged away.

I looked up to find the most familiar face.

My eyes were filled with tears and so were his.

"Cabir!" I sobbed as my head hit his hard chest and he wrapped his arms around me, patting my back.

"I failed to protect you....", he whispered in my ears and I could sense him trying to hide his tears. "I couldn't fulfil my promise to Abhi....", he sobbed in daze.

"Abhi?" I screamed as I broke the hug.

He sensed what he told and bit his tongue, looking here and there. This was something he always did when he was hiding something. But things about Abhi were never little for me.

Abhimanyu Murthy, my late elder brother.

The reporters ran behind us.

"Get into the car...", Cabir ordered as I jumped into the passenger seat and he into the driver seat and we drove up.

I closed my eyes tightly, letting my head rest back.

Everything I did, I couldn't get their words out of my head.

"You're a slut"

I'm not.

"Are you Manik Malhotra's new bed warmer?"

No. I was his P.A.

And his friend.

And I girl whom he kissed.

And a girl whom he threatened to destroy.

And a girl who loved him.

And a girl who thought he loves.

And maybe just another fling for him.

And maybe just another bedwarmer.

But I loved him.

Love.

"NANDINI!" Cabir shouted, bringing me out of my thoughts. "Kahan khoyi ho? Teen baar bulaaya!", He complaint.

"Sorry. Voh... I... I....", my throat went dry and tears welled in again.

I looked at my phone, which had 500 messages, but just one from Manik.

I opened it.

"I promised to ruin you. Welcome into the monsters world, princess"

A shiver passed down my spine. What had you done now Manik?

My phone vibrated in my pocket again and I finally picked up to see what Manik Malhotra has done again.

10,000 new notifications from Instagram.

With shaking hands and a heavy heart, I pressed the icon.

But the post that appeared in Manik fucking Malhotra's account took my breath away. My eyes welled and my hands shook. I stopped breathing for an instant and my heart skipped a beat.

No. This isn't what my Manik could do. No.

This was Manik Malhotra's post.

@manikmalhotra: just another stillness in my world of chaos 🎶 #baby #rose @nandinimurthy

My breath tightened.

Manik had shot us kissing?! WHEN?

What the fuck.

Shit. No.

Everytime I think things can't get worse, Manik proves me wrong.

Everytime I make myself strong for him, Manik breaks me again. He breaks me worse than the previous time.

But this time, Manik has crossed all the boundaries. This time there is no excuse to his monster behaviour.

"Cabir, Stop!" I barely whispered but the car was stopped.

"Can you drop me at Manik's house? Go to my house and get my passport, book me a ticket to London and meet me at the airport?" I asked in a lifeless voice, my face full of tears.

"Nand.....", he tried protesting.

"Please", I requested lifeless.

He took a deep breath and took a turn and I closed my eyes again, trying to get it all out my mind.

This time Manik has crossed all limits. What is the most important to a girl is her character, her self respect. And Manik has destroyed that.

I can't believe Manik can do anything like that. This is not the Manik I have loved, I have kissed under the sky and hugged to sleep. This is the monster, the monster I have never known.

I wanted to end my life. Each television channel has my picture termed as a slut, another bed warmer, another time pass for Manik Malhotra.

Can you imagine you being termed as a slut on national television when all your fault was to love a boy with all your heart?

I wanted to scream and tell them that I was pure, I was not a slut.

Unknowingly, a sob left my mouth and I failed to realise we had already reached.

Cabir got down of the car and opened the door for me. He leaned towards me, sitting on the road as he held my hand kept on my lap and I stared lifelessly into an abyss.

Manik. He can't do this to me.

He loved me. I have seen it in his eyes.

"Nandini", he called slowly and I broke down.

I broke down in his arms. I couldn't do anything. I had been strong for too long.

Sometimes, we just have to cry. We don't cry because we are weak. We cry because we have been strong for too long.

"Are you okay bacha?", he asked me patting my head just like Abhi used to and I weakly nodded.

"I am. I have to face this some day, then why not today?" I said weakly nodding.

Cabir kissed my forehead as I walked inside and he drove off to my house to get my passport.

I sat near the stairs of the headquarters and wrote him a letter with the help of a pen and paper provided my the guards outside.

I don't know if I can put my turmoil in words in front of him, but I can write it down.

I entered inside with weak steps. There was darkness all around and some silence, intimidating me, proving that this was a monsters den.

"No way, Malhotra!" I heard a scream that made me jump at my place. I peeped inside the room to see Aryamman shouting at Manik, his hands on his collar, furious.

While Manik? He was smiling calmly with an evil smirk and a drink in his hand.

"Malhotra you've gone too far in this game. She's a girl, there are people questioning her character!" Aryamman shouted while Manik laughed his evil laugh.

I closed my eyes and silent tears flew off. This was a monster, a real monster. He wasn't the man I had loved. He can never be.

"Well Aryamman, she has a beautiful body. Her curves are just perfect, and well her lips, they remind me of rose petals. She was a good catch....", Manik laughed and Aryamman punched him on his cheek.

"Hitting me won't change the truth. She was beautiful from inside, and on bed, well she was wild and fierce, just like fire....", Manik smirked.

No. He was lying. Nothing like that happened between us.

Manik hasn't even touched me. We have not had sex.

I was screaming loudly but I realised that no one could hear me because it was my heart that was screaming and breaking down. My mouth made no noise. My body lay numb with too much pain in my heart.

Manik Malhotra was a fucking lier.

"How does it feel Aryamman? Nandini in my arms.... all night, moaning and.. me inside her....", Manik couldn't continue because of other punches hit to him by Aryamman.

I covered my eyes letting the pain take over me.

The letter I wrote was long dropped at the entrance of this room.

"Yes Aryamman, bura lag raha hai? Mujhe bhi lag raha tha when you fucked....", Manik stopped as his eyes fell on me, sulking in a corner.

My body bent, my hair in a bun, my mascara flowing with the tears, and me a crying mess.

"Fucking Murthy with rosy lips!" He sang laughing in the air. He was highly drunk as he tried walking towards me but he stumbled.

"Nandini..!" Aryamman whispered in shock and I nodded negatively.

I wanted to go ahead and punch Manik. I wanted to slap him, beat him, punish him for lying to everyone about me, making my character and self respect as low as dust.

But my body decided against it as I took retreating steps and ran away from there.

I was on the road, crying and running when there was no one even following me.

It was just as if I was running away from the reality, as if running away will wake me up and I will realise it was all a nightmare.

But nothing like that happened, I just ran to end the pain and not face the cruel monster I loved.

I ran waiting for my end but it never came.

I stumbled and fell upon the ground, in the middle of the road, my eyes filled with tears.

I hugged my knees to chest trying to stop the pain but it never happened.

"I am not a slut", I whispered to myself. I wanted to scream but my voice wouldn't come out.

"Nandini!" I suddenly heard a voice but I couldn't look up, I was losing my senses.

Somewhere, somehow, I was in a car and Mukti and Navya were hugging me.

"Don't touch me, I am not a slut", I screamed trying to push them away but my voice came out in a whisper.

"Get away!", I screamed but the voice never came out.

They didn't move away from me so I myself crept away at the window.

I grabbed my phone and played some music in the ear phones.

With every tune, I could feel my nerves calming.

Manik Malhotra was the name of a person whom I loved the most in the entire universe, even more then myself. And now he is the person whom I can kill with my own hands.

"It's high time Aryamman, tell her the truth in London", I heard Cabir talk on the phone to Aryamman.

There were so many unanswered questions and I wanted an answer to all of them but I was too lifeless and a mess at this moment to even demand for an answer.

I preferred keeping my mouth shut and trying to get myself out of this mess. My heart was breaking into a million pieces and I could feel it, but I was helpless.

No more tears came out and I felt like a numb dead body.

The car stopped at the airport and I got out. I put my black shades on to hide my blood red eyes and grabbed my passport and small bag that Cabir managed to get.

I walked inside the airport followed by Navya. Mukti and Cabir kept calling me but I didn't turn back.

I hated myself for hurting them with no mistake of theirs.

But I knew if I say them, I wasn't strong enough to not show them my tears neither was I strong enough to see theirs.

This country, this city has given me a lot. It gave me an identity, some friends for life, a small family and Manik Malhotra.

But it took back more then it gave, crushing me so much from inside.

I am so lifeless that I feel nothing anymore, as I everything inside me is dead.

I have no motive to live anymore, I'm simply waiting for my end. The permanent one end to this life and sufferings.

I was punished miserably with no fault of mine, except the fact I fell in love with a wrong person.

I fell in love with a monster.

I fell in love with Manik Malhotra.

~sHE'S brOKen BECAUSE sHE beLIEveD~

M A N I K ' S P O V

I gripped the letter in my hands and finally decided to read it as my mind sobered.

Dear Manik,
I know you're wondering why I'm writing you this letter when I can text you or call you or not inform at all. But I'm still writing this, because I don't want to end up becoming another Soha of your life.
Yes, I'm leaving. I'm leaving just like she did. I can't do this anymore. I can't hang onto us anymore. You're right, you are a monster. A monster that I have to stay away from, a monster that threatened to ruin me, and that indeed destroyed me.
I was dumb to think this is love. Maybe it was, but just for me. You made me promise you that I won't ever cry because of you, but every tear that I have shed in the past few days are because of you, just because of you. Your love just dragged me into hell, sweetheart.
I'm sick. I'm tired of these stupid games you're playing. I was foolish to think that my love can heal you, that I can heal you. I was dumb that I thought that you'd love me back, that I'd find my own happily ever after in your arms.
But you were right. You are the monster, and not the Prince Charming of my dreams. But that didn't mean it gave you the right to destroy me the way you did. Yes, congratulations monster, you broke me in a way that I will never be able to pick myself up again. You broke the broken pieces of my heart and even now, each piece of my heart loves you with a different way. But I can't stay anymore, I can't put up with what you've pushed me into.
And now that I'm leaving, I wish to never see you anytime soon no matter how much I'd crave for you. Thank you for destroying my happily ever after in the worst way possible. But yet, I've lost nothing, it's you who's lost a person who truly loved you. But it was just a month of us, I'm sure I'd get over it.
I'd get over you, but I wouldn't ever be able to get over what you did to me.
But if possible, fall in love with someone and love her till your end, because happily ever afters do exist, it was just not us, baby.

Never yours,
~the girl you destroyed,
Nandini x

She left. She marked the end of us.

~you say it's you who left; but it's me who left you in the dark, in the black shadows of my heart. I'd see you cry, I'd see you scream; but baby, this is just the start of your worst dream~

~• E N D O F F L A S H B A C K •~

~•~