Chapter Five

"What the hell was he talking about?" Jackson asked us, as he held his crying wife and kids in his arms, "Did one of you guys kill someone?"

All eyes fell to Jessie.

"I didn't fucking kill anyone." Jessie claimed, as he picked up Robert's body, and began to drag it out of the house, "Why don't you ask Anabelle? It seems he only had interest in her."

"Yeah." Lilly agreed, "He was staring at you the whole time." She paused, "Anabelle, did something happen yesterday?"

I hated to be put in the spotlight, but of course, it was blatantly obvious. Negan's focus was only on me. He knew, I killed one of his disgusting, murderous human dogs, and because of it, Robert is dead.

Because of me.

I couldn't hold anything back. There was no point in lying about it, especially when everyone's lives are on the line right now. I took a deep breath, "Yes, I killed someone yesterday."

Nobody seemed surprised.

"Why would you do that?" May asked, "You know the rules here, you know killing is against our rules." Yes, the rules here, were that nobody was to kill anybody, unless absolutely necessary.

And I can confirm it was absolutely necessary.

"They trapped me in a gas station, May." I defended myself, "There were three of them, and they were going to kill me. They were psycho, all of them, I did what I had to do."

Jackson shook his head, "Well now look, Anabelle, the whole group is in danger because of your mistake."

I gasped at their unreasonable attitude, "What? Are you kidding me, Jackson? I did what I had to do to survive. Those pigs were going to rape me and leave me for the walkers!"

"We can't just pack up and move again," Lainey cried, "We nearly starved to death the last time we were out there. It's hell, and we shouldn't have to put the kids through that!"

"You can thank Anabelle for that." May murmured, and I gave her a look that clearly read disappointment.

"You can't blame her, guys." Lilly responded, by walking over and putting a hand on my shoulder, "We all would have done the same thing."

"That doesn't excuse the fact that we are at risk, now." Jackson bellowed, and I wished he would just understand.

But I don't expect him too, not when he has children, and a wife to look after.

"He wants revenge for one of his men." Jessie implied, as he walked into the house, "Robert wasn't worth the price. He wants more, it's obvious."

"So what are we going to do?"

"We do what he says." I stated, as if we really had any other choice, "He'll kill us if we don't."

"Not if we don't fight back." Jessie said.

"There were at least twenty-eight men along with him." Jackson said as he nodded his head, "I counted all of the men I could see. We can stop them, they'll never know what hit them."

I snorted, "Are you guys insane? They all had guns bigger than any of us have ever seen! If we try to fight these shits, we will die." I turned to Lilly and May, "You guys agree with me, don't you?"

Silence.

"Are you fucking serious?" I said, between breaths, "Am I the only one here with a brain?"

"We put our blood, sweat, and tears into this goddamn home. I'm not going to give that up to a man with a fucking baseball bat." Jackson said, and everybody agreed.

How come I was the only one who saw how dangerous Negan is?

"Fine." I said, as I leaned against the wall in defeat. "Robert is dead, there is now only six of us, including two little kids, but I'm sure you five all have a brilliant plan to defeat Negan, right? I'd love to hear it, maybe after that, we can start working up a plan to dominate the country, America doesn't stand a chance against the goddamn six of us."

"Don't be fucking stupid." Jessie snapped, "and yeah, for your information, I do have a plan. An easy one."

"And what's that?" I asked, looking at Jessie as if he had two heads.

"Barricade the house. They come for us, we shoot the fuck at them. We'll each take a window. Barricade the windows with metal plates from the highway. We'll scavenge some car doors if we have too."

"That's ridiculous."

He glared at me, "It'll work. Trust me."

Eventually, Jessie, May, and Lilly, all went out to scavenge for Jessie's 'brilliant' plan. I went up in the attic, claimed I would look for useful barricades, but I infact wanted to just be alone.

I sat on an old plastic-covered sofa. The silence was intense up here, and the dust was suffocating, but I enjoyed it.

I enjoyed being away from everyone. Right now, I'm the enemy of the group. They probably wouldn't give two shits if I got devoured by a horde of the dead.

Just like nobody gave a shit that Robert was taken from us. All because he was 'two old to survive' he wasn't useful to them, they didn't care.

Now, I'm the un-useful one. I practically proved it by going to for nearly half the day yesterday, and coming back with no supplies but a pack of gum and a box of cigarettes. Not to mention I had Negan on my tail, I practically lead him here.

I sighed and leant my head back.

There was no way we could have a chance fighting Negan and his gang. We were all going to die because of a stupid risk.

And it's all my fucking fault.