You’re gonna tell me
you love me today

-amen

Choi Minjae

"Is that bish for real?"

"You've said that for a hundred times now Byul."

I heaved a deep sigh rolling to the other side of the bed and my eyes met hers. She looked pissed off, as she had been since yesterday.

"I just fucking can't with him. If I were in his place, I would be happy to find out I'm straight!" She yelled and faced upward, staring at the ceiling of her room that was filled with glowing stickers.

It was morning and we had breakfast already but I decided not to go to college so she didn't too. Even though I hadn't shown it on my face, I felt depressed and heartbroken. But somehow I suppressed the urge to cry.

Since we had nothing else to do, we were just lying on the bed with Byul constantly scoffing and me sighing.

"It's okay Byul, he has all the right to be angry. H-he will be fine one day, right? I mean h-he'll forgive?"

The thing that scared me the most was the thought of him never talking to me again, would I be able to bear that?

"Since it's you I'm sure he will." This time Byul was the one sighing. "And hey, you're still in a better position than me."

"What?" I shouted sprinting up from the bed. "You're dating someone? Why haven't I heard about it!"

I started shaking Byul by her shoulders but she moved away then lied down with her face smashed against her pillow. "No, I'm not. It's from a long time ago." Her voice came out muffled but I could still make out what she was saying.

"Long time ago? But come on, I tell you everything! You've never told me this!"

"Argh, it wasn't dating, I just liked that person." She yelled frustrated, still lying in that same position.

"And..?" I trailed off with a questioning tone.

"And they liked another person, so my crush ended there."

We stayed silent for a bit until I started talking again. "I'm sure your crush didn't end just then and there."

"Yeah." She replied in a softer tone.

"Well guess what? You'll get over it, you just have to find the right person. I used to like Shownu hyung so much, then I found out he had a girlfriend. We're same on this, aren't we?" I giggled a bit then continued. "But look, then I found Kihyun and now we..."

I couldn't speak anymore.

We? Was there any 'us' anymore?
Kihyun surely hates me now. For lying, hiding such a big fact. I seem like a selfish person.

Tears had started to form in my eyes, I bit my lip and fought them back. "He'll surely call you, talk to you soon." Byul said and sat up from her position.

"I never thought this day would come though, you're finally acting like a girl!''

I couldn't help but let out a small laugh, she was actually quite surprised.

"Just don't feel sad about it, okay? Laugh like that. I'm sure he'll call in a week or tw-"

Just then my phone rang indicating that it was a text from someone. Byul and I glanced at each other first then I hurried towards the phone, as I opened it Byul peeked from my back with sheer curiosity and started reading the text aloud.

"I'm near Byul's house. Can we meet now?"

The text was from Kihyun.

I couldn't believe it, seemed like Byul couldn't too. There was a pin dropped silence in the room with just us frozen in our spots.

"Oh my god! Go outside, now!" Byul screamed, breaking the icy silence and making me snap out of the daze.

"H-he texted me? This soon!?"

"Shut up and wear your coat bitch." Byul was literally running around the room, then she found my coat and threw it over to me. Jumping over the bed she made her way closer and started rearranging my hair in a rush.

"What? You look alright, go now!" She shouted again, pointing to the door and this time I was fully back from my reverie.

I turned to go outside but right before doing that I turned around. "But w-what if he's here to break up-"

"Go and find that out." She then threw my scarf at me and I caught it. Right before going outside I saw Byul planting her face on her pillow again letting out a groan.

Perhaps she was just as anxious as me. But I was more afraid than anxious.

My throat had already became dry by the time I'd stepped outside Byul's house. I wanted to run back and hide somewhere.

All I could think was, he's here to end it.

But still I kept on walking like a zombie, it was like my mind was against it but my feet wasn't. Every step I took my lower part of body became heavier but I still couldn't stop.

Finally I saw him standing outside his car, waiting silently with his arms crossed over his chest. My heart dropped in my stomach, I wanted to go there and give him a sudden hug and say that I was sorry a million times.

I didn't want to break up. I really liked him, a lot.

This time it was so hard to fight back my tears, my vision was so blurry I couldn't half see. I made my fists into balls, my knuckles turning white for the amount of force. I tried calling out his name but he had already noticed that I was there.

He looked away biting his lower lip when I walked closer to him. We two were just standing there silently.

"You know, I'm still angry at you." He muttered looking away.

"I haven't forgiven you. I don't know if i-" he trailed off and I was still quiet, I couldn't even bear to look at him.

"Why aren't you saying anything!" He shouted a little angrily and I tried speaking but words weren't coming out properly.

"I..I'm.. Sorry."

"Sorry doesn't cut anything." He said in a pained voice and suddenly sat on the ground. "Argh! Don't make faces like that, it's hard for me to stay angry at you!"

"W-what faces?" I stuttered a bit being surprised.

"I don't know, just don't cry." He stood up again and looked right into my eyes.

"But I'm not, I'm not crying." I said and looked ahead, I couldn't keep up with his stare.

It was silent again until he spoke first. "I thought about it all night, and came to meet you today because of a news." He shoved his hands inside his jeans' pockets.

Oh god, please don't say you want to end it here.

"I met my dad yesterday and apparently my parents had decided to sent me off to Paris. To study my senior year there and also become a CEO of our company's brunch in Paris."

My heart literally stopped beating, I couldn't breath. He was leaving?

"So you're-"

"I'm not going."

We stared at each other for a minute and he started talking again. "I thought I would but after thinking about it, I don't want to. Do you want to start afresh?"

"Yeah." I bobbed my head up and down in a daze then tried to put a smile on. "I'm Choi Minjae, I don't look like it but apparently I'm a girl."

"I'm Yoo Kihyun. I'm a guy and I look like it." He held out his hand for a handshake and I took it. "But even though I'm a guy there's this person who likes calling me a nagging mom."

I couldn't but burst out in laughter, he started laughing too and we were both still shaking each other hands. "Oh my god, no wonder why your hands are so small." He laced his fingers with my small ones abruptly, making a blush appear in my face.

"I shouldn't have met you today, I don't feel angry anymore." He stated, I could seriously kiss him right now but I stopped myself.

"Let's go and tell the others too." I gave him a big smile hugging onto his arm from the side. Now I wanted to tell the truth to others too, I wasn't afraid anymore having him by my side.

***

"Hyung, why Paris?" I asked sitting beside him while he was driving the car. "I mean why did you parents suddenly decided that?"

"Hyung?" He took a quick glance at me then looked ahead at the road. "I think it's oppa now."

"I'm not calling you that!" I screeched while he smirked playfully. "Why, you want to call me honey or darling?"

"Ew, shut up! And tell me about Paris."

"Okay okay, it was my dream to work at that brunch in Paris when I was little, even when I was a teen I really wanted to work there." He kept his eyes ahead steering the wheel swiftly.

"How about now?"

His phone rang and he cut the call off, it didn't seem like he'd heard my question. "I, uh, actually told my dad yesterday that I would go there and he's way too excited now. Who knows maybe he has made all the arrangements already." He took left a turn in the road.

"Oh, was that your dad who just called now?"

"Yep."

"I think you should go to Paris."

He pushed the break all of a sudden giving me a shocked expression. "You want me to leave?"

"If it's your dream you should go for it. And it seems like your parents expects that from you too, being a CEO is a big thing! They trust you enough to make you big part of their company. You're still young I mean." As I was telling him his eyes just went wider and wider.

"How-"

"I'll go talk to the others now!" I peered my head out the window and we were quite close to the mansion. Without saying anything else I jumped off the car and started running.

I thought of not thinking about it because that will just make me more anxious and afraid. I'll just say the truth. I will scream saying it!

I ran inside the living room. All of them were there. My eyes fell upon Wonho and hyungwon sitting on the couch with Jooheon in the middle. Changkyun, Shownu and Minhyuk standing behind them. There was a laptop placed on the table before them and all of their eyes were glued there.

"Minjae-ah!" Wonho screamed noticing me first. "You're here?"

"Save me!" Jooheon said out of blue and Minhyuk put a hand over his mouth from behind.

"Did you like your vacation at Byul's place?" Minhyuk asked. "We missed you!"

Changkyun and I shared a glance with each other. He told them I was on a vacation at Byul's place?

"Now come here." Hyungwon motioned me to come and sit with them. "Watch porn with us."
"You guys are disgusting and nasty pieces of shit!" Jooheon yelled getting out of Minhyuk's grip.

"As if you haven't watched porn before. Come on, I first watched it in fourth grade!" Shownu spoke for the first time, almost like he was scolding Jooheon.

"Yeah, but I'll prefer to watch alone." Jooheon sneered and I noticed Wonho and Hyunwon were holding both his arms from the sides.

"But you lost the bet honey." Minhyuk gave him a cheeky smile. So they were forcing Jooheon to watch porn.

They were going on and on and meanwhile I took in a deep breath preparing myself. Kihyun entered the room too sweating a little, he probably ran to get here. Before he could say anything I shouted.

"Guys, I'm a girl!"

My scream was loud enough to make them stop their conversation. Everyone was silent but Changkyun's eyes were pouring out of his socket, he must've never guessed I'll say it so suddenly.

"That was a nice joke." Wonho commented after a while and everyone burst out laughing.

"What the hell was that Minjae! You're so funny-"

"He is. I mean she is, a girl." Kihyun huffed for air and stood beside me. It went silent again, Changkyun came from the back of the couch and stood by my other side.

With no one saying anything, only sounds of moaning were coming from somewhere, probably from the laptop. And that sound was only getting louder and heavier.

Shownu shut off the lid of the laptop with a loud thud and it stopped.

"Y-youre a girl? T-this joke is not fun anymore." Jooheon stuttered taking turns to look at our eyes.

Just then Minhyuk fell on the floor with a loud bam fainting.

____________________________________
A/n: I can't believe I got at least 7 people into monsta x with this fanfic, I'm shooketh!

So, Minjae is probably the most loved female lead among the other fanfics I've written. Can you state a reason why you love Minjae?