Parento-phobia?

I'd never known that waiting for someone could feel so stressful. I was Kayden, I didn't fret, I didn't anticipate or dwell in anxiousness because I wanted something to happen. The only other thing that always gave me a sense of nervousness was basketball because I was anticipating too much of the game to come ahead of time.

And like I did with every stressful moment, I took a shower because over thinking it would cause me to be disoriented.

The sound of the doorbell came fifteen minutes after my shower. He's here, he's here... I walked to the door with my stomach in knots, and for the thousandth time, I couldn't understand what was happening to me.

Pulling the door open, Julian suddenly turned to me like I had just caught him looking at something else. His lips pulled into a small smile when he saw me. His brown hair looked lighter with the sun trying to shine through it from behind.

               Julian took a step forward and hugged me, and there it was again...the familiar tightening in my gut. It felt suspiciously like something inevitably close, just waiting to happen. Was this us now? Were we going to keep hugging each other every time we met? Not that I was complaining...

               "Hi," Julian's eyes drifted up, a confident and cocky grin on his lips. I felt the solidness of his body at that moment, and it all made sense why that teacher scolded him for not being sporty. "Your hair is wet."

              I detached from him and automatically touched my hair. "I just hit the shower because I was a little stressed."

               "Hey, I do that too!" Julian said.

               "Like when I called you 'bro'?" I boldly asked.

               "Who said I was stressed because of that?"

You literally didn't reply for a while after that, and said you were going to take a shower.

               "Did it bother you?" Julian asked while crossing his arms, smile never leaving his face. "That I took a while to reply?"

               Jeez... where was all this confidence coming from? "Never mind," I finally said. "Welcome to my humble home."

Julian hummed and nodded.

I made to close the door, then remembered that Julian was probably here with his bodyguard too. I poked my head outside and saw him. Yep, stoic as ever. "Hey MIB, you can come inside, you know."

               "I'm good, thank you," he said, standing at the porch and staring straight ahead as if assessing the surroundings for any threats.

               "So you're just going to stand there?" I asked stubbornly. Partly to annoy him, and partly because Ma would kill me if I wasn't hospitable to a guest. Letting him just keep standing there like that really didn't seem hospitable.

               MIB didn't answer me. His jaw was set in an unwavering manner and he looked like he wouldn't budge even if I put up a convincing protest. I made the mistake of just letting him be as he was.

Julian followed me to my room after I closed the door, and only when I reached inside did I realise that I had invited him over with absolutely no goal in mind. I just told him to come over because I wanted him here. Now that the primary goal was established, I didn't know what to do next. I racked my brain for options, anything...

Before I could let myself get nervous, my eyes fell onto my game console and I immediately knew what to do.

•••

It was approximately fifteen minutes into playing Mortal Kombat—me as Scorpion and him as Mileena—when I realised I was staring at Julian's profile.

I could tell from where I was, that he had soft skin, he had a long and pointy nose and right below that were his slightly pink lips. It was unfathomable why I was staring. I was tripping, because in all the time I've played video games, I don't ever remember getting distracted by anything, apart from my mom, (when she demanded my attention). More than that, I don't ever remember the desire to look at the person next to me...not even an ounce of it. Unless it was for purposes of catching the expressions on their faces when they lost. This had nothing to do with that.

               "Dude, what are you doing?" Julian suddenly laughed. His lips were pretty, that was for sure. "Are you that bad at this?" He turned and looked at me.

My eyes quickly fleeted to the floor before I sat straighter, pretending he hadn't almost caught me staring at him. "Pfft, I was only giving you a head-start before I crushed you."

"Yeah right," he said, clearly not believing me. I proved him wrong by doing exactly what he didn't think I was capable of. It wasn't even that hard, I couldn't wipe off the smugness from my face if I tried.

"What the fuck?" Julian said after he'd been knocked out. He looked at me with his lips parted in surprise and a frown on his face. What he looked like he was trying to say was 'hey, what gives?'.

I chuckled. "Told you I was just giving you a head-start."

Julian heavily breathed out and scrunched his nose. Dear God. "No," he said. "Let's go again. In fact, this time we're exchanging controllers and still using the same characters. I'll be Scorpion, and you'll be Mileena."

I shrugged. "Yes sir." I calmly said, knowing what the outcome would still be, regardless of the changes made.

Julian looked at me suspiciously before taking the controller from me and giving me his. He restarted the game.

I decided to start by dodging all of his attacks. Like I knew it would, it frustrated him. I was being a tease and I loved it. "Stand still so I can hit you, come on!" The frustrated boy yelled to me.

"Fine, fine," I replied, not meaning a word of it.

The entire time, I still stole glimpses of Julian. I liked seeing his face change expressions as he tried his best to focus on beating me. The plan was to let him think he was finally going to land a hit, then expertly dodge him again, but I must have really gotten distracted because he suddenly piped up, startling me back into the game only to see that he had indeed landed the first hit.

I was amused to see him laugh at me because of that one hit. I let him land more hits. More hits equaled to more laughs from him. Easy choice. What the fuck Kayden?

When Julian was sure he was going to win, he said, "See, I knew your character was just overpowered."

"Now that you said that," I replied. "I have to prove you wrong."

He chuckled. "Try your best, Kayden The Cute."

"You are going to take that back after I'm done with you."

"Yeah, if you can even win at this point."

I sighed. "I guess you're gonna have to learn the hard way."

In some seconds, I'd totally knocked Julian out with his own character. He looked like he would strangle me if he could. "You sure your character wasn't overpowered?" I asked. "Because that was almost too easy."

Julian groaned and lightly punched my side, making me laugh. "Aw, someone's a sore loser."

"And someone's a show-off."

"Maybe I'll let you win next time."

"No thank you," he said. "I'd prefer the look on your face when I beat you fair and square."

"Just make sure it ain't after thirty years or so, okay Juju?"

He looked like he wanted to murder me. "Fine," he said. "I'll wipe that smirk off your face."

"Look forward to it." I let out a light laugh after that, and then dropped on my back, watching the ceiling from my bed. Shortly after, Julian did the same.

"What had you so busy yesterday?" I asked him. "You saw the person you didn't want to see?"

"Oh yeah, that...She's this girl, sort of like a family friend...I think she likes me," he replied. "But no, I didn't see her yesterday. I actually told you about it at the art show. She's Katey."

"That Katey?" I asked, remembering how I asked him if that was his girlfriend or not. For some reason, all I felt at that time was the burning need to know.

"Yeah," he said. "That Katey."

"She ask you out or somethin'?"

               "She probably thinks we're already a thing. She even made me feel her tits and all."

"Damn Ju, is she hot?"

"I think so? She is..."

"Mm, tits are the best," I replied Julian.

"Yeah def–"

"Kay!" We both heard the sound coming from downstairs.

               "Ma?" She didn't say she would be back. I got up and kept walking away towards the door. I stopped before I could get out. "Wanna say hi to my mom?" I asked as I turned back to Julian.

                "I'm...no," he replied. "I mean, I'm afraid of parents."

                I tried not to laugh and it was showing, because Julian's lips quirked a bit. Then we both burst out in laughter. "What the hell man?" I asked him.

               "It happens Kay! They are scary."

               "Never heard you call me that before."

Julian shrugged and looked at the floor. "It's only fair since you call me Juju. Although I'm still finding the one to suit you best."

I walked over to him and pulled his cheeks. "Oh Juju," I said mockingly.

Mockery could only go so far. It quickly turned to a moment that threatened to have me running for cover.

He was looking up at me, with his face in my hands as I looked down at him. I froze as my heart began to beat faster. I felt hot, Julian's face changed colour and my hands felt clammy. I released him and stepped back.

To make the situation feel normal, I took Julian's hand in mine. "Come on," I said. "Ma's really cool. Be not afraid."

He chuckled before getting up and following behind me. "Okay."

I was way too aware of my hand enclosing his. It felt like my heart was beating from the little spaces where they were joined. We made it downstairs like that, and Ma looked subtly questionably at where I held Julian's hand in mine.

Before she could say anything, I took his hand and placed it in her hands in the most awkward moment I've ever created. Julian seemed terrified and Ma just looked like she was keeping all her questions to herself.

"Ma, this is my friend Juj- Julian," I said. "Julian, this is my mom."

"Hi sweetie," my mom said and shook his hand. I knew she had questions, but she didn't ask them. She might not ask them now, but I was sure she'd eventually get to them. She turned to me.

"Who is that man standing outside?" Ma asked. Shit, I knew she'd kill me for that.

"Oh MIB?" I pointed to Julian. "His bodyguard."

Ma looked at Julian—who couldn't look at either of us—then looked back to me. "How long has he been standing outside?"

               "Uh...Ma," I said while rubbing the back of my neck. "I'm not sure, but like–"

                "I just come to change and come back to find that you've already done away with your manners. Boy what'd I tell you?"

"That you can't–"

"You can't leave a guest just standing outside for possibly hours," she said as she walked towards the direction of the front door.

I followed her to make my appeal. "Ma, I tried. He wouldn't listen to me."

I watched as Ma got in front of MIB, her hair was tucked behind one ear as she looked up at him. He kept looking ahead without budging, as if she wasn't there. His shades hid his expression so I couldn't exactly tell where he was looking.

"You are indeed a bodyguard like you said," Ma told him so I think they talked before she came in. "But I'm going to ask you again, come in sir, you don't want me to repeat that when I'm angry."

               "No shit MIB," I chipped in. "I'd listen if I were you."

MIB, whose jaw was clenched the entire time finally seemed to relax. I'm sure no one else saw it, but he smirked. It was really small but I caught it before it disappeared.

MIB finally moved his huge frame into the house, and peace prevailed. In all honesty, I didn't want to see Ma's angry side either so I was glad he listened.

                "Sit," she said and pointed at the couch and for the first time ever, I saw MIB take off his shades and then he lowered himself on the couch, looking a little uneasy. "Can I get you anything?" Ma asked.

Julian and I looked at each other. His expression and the shake of his head told me that he didn't know what was going on either.

MIB shook his head. "No, thank you."

"Kay," she said to me. "Get him something. I'm late, I need to go change and leave. It was nice to meet you sweetie!" She said the last part to Julian.

I got MIB water because who could go wrong with that right? "Sorry, we're out of alien juice," I said as I handed him the water. Julian audibly held back his laugh.

The man sighed before taking it.

"You know, you should wear your shades less. Don't get me wrong, like damn you look cool in them glasses but like I didn't suspect pretty eyes behind them. The ladies love that shit man, like that's a plus on your si-"

"Leave the man alone Kay!" I heard Ma yell from upstairs.

•••

Julian and I had gone back to my room after Ma left. We spent close to thirty minutes talking non stop about the most random things. I found out that he hated the colour green...he'd probably never seen his eyes. He also went further into detail about spider sex, I didn't know there were so many ways those little bastards could have sex. But why did he know this? Fun fact, I could listen to him talk for hours.

Just when I thought we'd play another video game (I'd even asked him), Julian turned to me and said, "I wish I could, but I have to go."

Already?

"Okay. We'll both pretend you're not just running away from defeat." I pointed to the game console.

Julian laughed. "Aw Kay," he said in a patronising tone. "Don't get too excited because I let you believe you're really good."

MIB was on his feet looking restless when we found him downstairs again. The poor thing. One look at Julian and he understood what was happening, giving him one subtle nod before exiting the house.

  I want to see you again. I wanted to tell him, but I didn't know how.

Julian turned to me when he reached the door. Was that surprise I saw on his face? "You do?"

"What?" I asked.

"You said you want to see me again," replied Julian.

"Damn, I said that out loud?" Guess it worked itself out.

He chuckled and I watched as his hand disappeared into the back of his head in his hair. "I guess...me as well."

Before the hand could disappear back into his hoodie, I grabbed it and I loved the way my fist closed around his wrist. I pulled him to me at the same time his eyebrows had started to draw together in question, making him look surprised.

With one arm around him I buried my nose in his hair and inhaled, (I really tried to be subtle about it). His shampoo was probably something with apples or berries or both at the same time. It smelled good.

Julian finally seemed to get over his surprise because his arms finally closed around me before letting go.

I let him go, then recalling what he said at The Mad Egg, I repeated the words. "Well bye then," I told him. My lips pulled up in a smile without me asking them to. "Wait, what' you doing tomorrow?"

Stretched, there was a blush on his cheeks. I failed to stop staring. "My mom needs me," he said.

When I said that I failed to stop staring, I really did. I was sure it was my turn to do the dialogue but I didn't know what to say. I only snapped out of it when Julian pointed it out. "Kay..." he seemed careful with his words. "Stop staring at me."

I shook my head. "When's the next time you got nothin' to do?"

He pursed his lips in thought.

"This weekend?"

"This weekend..." I replied. It was a bad answer. "Shit, I've got a thing with the guys this weekend. I'll text you though."

Julian got in the car after MIB pulled the door of the backseat open for him. He waved and smiled before the car drove off. I walked back in and closed the door behind me and just let out a deep breath.

Come on Kayden, smelling hair? I scolded myself. Some corny white boy shit right there.