†† Ellis ††

I followed Jason outside not paying attention until he came to a stop and I almost walked into the back of him. "This is mine," he said.

I stepped back, one step...two.  Wow. Nice ride. 

Honestly,  I expected a pimped-up truck or a fancy foreign model. But nope. It was a classic. The Classic. A Chevy Impala no less, and my respect for him went up a notch.

"What?" He arched a brow. "Let me guess, you expected something shiny and new?" He smirked, slipping into the driver's seat. "Am I right?"

I shook my head, opened the passenger side door and slipped into the seat trying to act cool. "Didn't think anything at all," I lied which made him chuckle.  "Fuck," I said when the engine started purring and my face almost split in two. "Okay, yeah. I'm officially in love."

Jason's hand curled around the wheel with a possessive grip, while the other casually rested on the gearshift as he hummed affectionately. "Gets you hard, doesn't it?" He looked over at me. "This will be the smoothest ride of your life."

His tone hinted at something else and I shot him a sideways glance. Or was I just reading too much into it? Like I did earlier with the line, I'm taking you home.

As we cruised through the familiar streets, I couldn't help but sense a weird shift in the space between us. The silence became louder and the closer we got to my apartment the heavier the weirdness became. I tried to relax by keeping my gaze fixed outside on the passing scenery until it felt so heavy that I wanted out of the car and with a quick exhale, I decided to take a chance, hoping to avoid any further awkwardness.

"Hey, Jason, actually, could you drop me off here?" I gestured towards a bustling strip minutes from where I lived. "It's just a short walk from here to my place and I could do with stretching my legs."

To my relief, the car slowed and he looked outside and then simply nodding he pulled over to the curb. As I stepped out of the car, I offered him a grateful smile and muttered my thanks for the ride and shut the door quickly. And watching him drive away the weirdness lifted and I could breathe.  

What the fuck was that all about?  

Shrugging it off, I turned and started walking wondering if it was just me. I hadn't imagined it at the graduation party that time when he'd asked me to suck him off and that he wanted to see me on my knees.

Ugh.  Let's not go there and I shoved that thought away to the back of my mind. Right back. Far enough away that I never brought it up again.

But still, there were questions, and uncertainties gnawing at me, like vultures on a scabby carcass. It was a side of myself I hadn't fully explored, a puzzle I wasn't ready to solve. Ignoring it felt like the safest option, but deep down, I knew it wouldn't make those nagging doubts disappear.

Looking around, the strip was already busy, people were out, dipping into the bars and shops and restaurants that lined it. And my tiredness from earlier had gone away and now I wasn't in a rush to head home.

Carrying on walking I slowed as a couple entered what appeared to be a small, busy bar. In the doorway were two guys, one pressing the other against the wall as he murmured something in his ear. A weird feeling shuttled through me at the sight and I glanced up.

Ah. I saw the bar's name and immediately realized it was a popular gay hangout.

Ignoring the surge of curiosity that went through me, I took a few steps forward, but then stopped and glanced back at the guys—who seemed lost in each other, neither noticed me staring. Thank fuck. 

But whilst they were busy I could see they were both attractive, but I felt zero physical attraction when I looked at them. 

That was good, right?  Perhaps I was looking for things that just wasn't there.  Lets test this out and before I could think better of it I reached for the door and headed inside. 

Inside the bar was noisy and the loud music made my ears ring. Men and women danced around me as I worked my way through the crowd towards the bar at the far end. I felt the occasional hand land on my ass, but my lively pace had me safely at the bar within seconds.

I looked around and reality of where I was set in. 

What the fuck was I doing in here?

"What can I get you?" asked the heavily tattooed and pierced bartender.

"Scotch—" better not have it neat. "—with Soda," I replied, then took a long drink when the bartender dropped it down in front of me. Already having alcohol in my system the hit of it instantly took the edge off and I looked around again. I felt eyes on me from multiple sources but settled on a guy at the end of the bar who was watching me with more than a casual interest.

Yeah, I guess you could say he was a good-looking guy too—late twenties, early thirties maybe, dressed in a suit. Some type of businessman, I figured. And because I'd obviously stared too long he nodded at me, then called for the bartender, his eyes never leaving me. Seconds later the bartender pushed another drink in front of me and motioned towards the guy.

Well fuck. And I had to bite down on a smirk.

Was it that easy to get a drink around here?

I swallowed down the rest of my drink and then picked the second as I turned my attention back to the dancers. Bodies writhed and sweated under the multi-coloured lights that flashed overhead and the pulsing bass of the music had me wondering if I had any aspirin at home or if should I stop and buy some just in case. 

The couples here were mostly men, but there were a few women. I almost expected to feel something at the sight of all the grinding and groping that was going on, but I didn't.

But there were a few couples on the edge of the dance floor, some talking, others making out and I begrudgingly admitted that I was somewhat turned on at the sight of two men who were all over each other like they weren't in a public place, but my interest was nothing like the all-consuming heat I'd felt when Zack had fucked me, hell, just him kissing did things I didn't understand.

And right on cue my cock instantly responded to an image of Zack and I shifted on the barstool uncomfortably.

Traitor,  I reminded it. Not that it ever listened.

"Hey there, beautiful," My head shot up to watch the guy who'd sent a drink over park himself next to me. His body brushed mine as he ordered two more drinks.

Well, shit. I hadn't expected that either... or being called beautiful.

How fucking cheesy and no wonder girls rolled their eyes at that line.

But what did I expect?

Duh. 

He'd bought me a drink and in 'straight' terms that meant you were interested if you accepted. So why would the rules be any different here?

Fuck. I was an idiot.

But it didn't stop me finishing the second drink and I didn't say shit when the guy shoved a third drink into my hand. But now I'd started thinking about Zack another memory flashed on through—of me sucking on his dick, which only made me harder. 

Forgetting about the guy, buying me drinks I started on my third glass. The man must have taken my silence as some kind of welcome because his hand closed over my thigh and travelled up towards my cock which showed no sigh of protest at his interest, in fact, it began to throb. But not because of him. Nope, it was more evidence of what was becoming clearer to me as the seconds ticked on.

And just as the man's fingers were about to squeeze my erection through my jeans, I stood and pulled away. "Thanks for the drinks," I mumbled as swallowed the last of what was left in the glass and placed it on the countertop.

The man looked pissed, but I didn't give a shit and turned to leave, where I instantly slammed into a hard body.

"You done?" Jason asked as his huge hands closed around my upper arms to steady me.

What the fuck!?  He hadn't driven off. He'd followed me!

Jason was only about an inch taller than me, but still, it felt like I had to look up to see him. "Stalking's a crime y'know?"

He did not look happy. What was his problem?

I tugged myself free, then pushed past him and headed for the door,

Outside, I swayed a little. Fuck. Giving my head a little wobble, I just wanted to get home. Alone. Sucking in cool air I started walking, keeping my head down and hoped Jason wasn't following me.

Just my fucking luck when I heard him ask.  "You find what you were looking for?" He walked in step with me. "Back there... in a gay bar!?"

I didn't answer hoping he might take the hint.

He didn't but at least he stayed quiet and before I realised where I was—my door was in front of me and I fumbled in my pocket for my keys.

Fuck I was more drunk than I thought feeling a rush of lightheadedness.

I heard a snort from behind me, then watched Jason snatch the keys out of my hand. I was still staring at my door but sucked in a sharp breath when I felt the other man's body pin mine as Jason easily worked the key inside the lock. But instead of turning the key, I watched his hand drift up in slow motion until it rested on my hip.

Why wasn't I shoving him away? Must be the booze dulling my reflexes, right?

As he turned me around, fucking warning sirens went off in my head but I stayed quiet as Jason pressed me back against my door.

"That guy wanted you," Jason murmured as his fingers dug into my hip. "Looks like you wanted him too," he said as his eyes dipped and stared at the obvious bulge in my jeans—the hard-on that wouldn't quit.

But whilst Jasons eyes were down, I stared at him.

"Your staring," he said

My eyes dropped but instead of looking somewhere else they drifted down his body and I noticed I wasn't the only one struggling with an erection. But the way Jason eyed me like I was prime steak made me think the man wasn't confused by his body's reaction.

"Or is that for someone else, huh?" A cocky grin now tugged at those full lips.

Again the opportunity was there to push him away but rather than blaming the alcohol and weed I pinned it on all the unanswered questions that had taken up space in my brain since getting back to the US.

So I stood there and watched the other man's mouth come closer... and closer.

Fucking hell.

This was the point I should have really stopped whatever this was—but I didn't.

Christ. His kiss was demanding and my eyes shut when I felt a tongue slide over the seam of my lips seeking entry. It should be easy to open up to this man because he was so much like Zack— big, intimidating, controlling, and confident.

The goal I had going into that bar was a test to figure out what my body really wanted. And if being at that bar didn't confirm it, then this kiss absolutely did. It was a great kiss, and Jason was hot by any man's standards guessed—straight or gay.

Yet, it felt totally wrong and I yanked my head back freeing my lips from his. And even though my eyes stayed closed, I felt Jason hang there for a moment, likely reading me to see if I truly wanted the kiss to end.

With a grunt, he freed me and stepped back and then I heard the distinctive snick of the key in the lock.

"Why don't you go get cleaned up? I'd offer to take care of that, but you might be better doing it yourself." Jason smirked as he glanced again at my erection. "This time..."

Jesus, the man had zero boundaries.

Now feeling the sluggish effects of the alcohol and honestly, I couldn't be bothered to argue I headed into my bathroom and shut the door—locking it. Flipping on the shower, I stripped out of my clothes and stepped under the hot water. I tried to will my cock into submission, but the bastard wasn't listening.

Fuck it.

I wrapped my hand around it and a few strokes in an image of Zack's cock slowly fucking me as he stared at me with those black eyes of his. My ass clenched and it took seconds after that for me to unload onto the shower tile and then I watched in languid satisfaction as my cum mixed with the water and disappeared down the drain. I leaned back against the cold tile and let the lingering pleasure loosen my muscles before forcing myself to finish my shower and hoped when I stepped out of the bathroom my unwanted guest would have fucked off.

Again, it seemed I wasn't in luck hearing the sound of the TV, and slipping on a pair of sweats and nothing else I found Jason had made himself at home and was already working on the first piece of pizza that had apparently been delivered in record time.

Or had I been in that shower long?

With a sigh, I dropped down on the other sofa making sure there was a decent enough gap between us and grabbed a slice of pizza and watched the man assault the remote, flipping through channels... like it was completely normal for us to be hanging out.

Which, sitting here with him now, felt oddly okay and he was more relaxed too, not being controlling at all.

"Don't you have a home to go to?" I said settling back against a huge fluffy cushion that my sister had brought as apartment warming gift. Goddamn thing was bright yellow and something I wouldn't choose in a million years. I bit into my pizza thankful it was just plain cheese.

"Yeah, I have a very nice apartment." He looked around. "This place has potential though."

"Only moved in five days back—well, technically six now."

He nodded.

"So why did you follow me? I'm sure you have better things to do than watch me figure out if I liked the other team."

"So that's what that was tonight?" Jason asked as he snagged another piece of pizza. "Cause there's a lot of places with much hotter guys."

"What? Hotter than you?" I said, then nearly choked when I realized I'd said the words out loud.

Jason laughed before taking another bite. "Let me make it simple for you. Relax. It doesn't need to be complicated," he said, sucking the grease off his fingers. "Get out of your head, you don't need to pick a team."

My gut tightened. It was easy for him to say. He was obviously comfortable in his own skin and I was to a degree. I knew for a fact I was into Sasha. My dick rose to the occasion every damn time I had an inappropriate or appropriate thought about her... and just to prove that fact my dick twitched.

But yeah, It was glaringly obvious I had a thing for Zack too. Even though I'd tried my best to tell myself he'd tricked me into it—manipulated those feelings and yeah, I was still pissed about it even with my more enlightened state.

I fell silent and finished off the rest of the pizza slice, then wiped my now clammy hand on my sweats.

"It is because of me?" he asked.

Pfft. Ego much. "Nah." I shook my head.

"Who then?"

What was the harm in telling him?

So I started at the very beginning with him at the graduation party and ended with me walking out on Sasha. And he sat there and listened without any judgement or smart-ass comebacks.

"Then I was right on the right track. 'Course, I think for you it's less about teams and more about finding the right teammates. Cock or pussy, it's fine to enjoy, hell, love both."

I dropped my head back on the sofa and sighed. Never in my fucked up dreams did I think I'd be sitting here with Jason Bents, practically a stranger. A man I'd let kiss me just so I could experiment, test the waters with.

"Sorry for using you earlier. Or if I gave out the wrong idea," I muttered as my eyes began to feel heavy.

"Don't apologise, Ellis, with your ass and that face, it wasn't an imposition." I listened to him chuckle and I didn't both hiding my smirk. The guy was okay, and forward, and hotter than the average dude... but I was starting to like hanging out with him and that was my last thought before sleep dragged me under and when I woke up cold and with a stiff neck, hugging my sister's fluffy yellow cushion as well as drooling, I was alone.

Lifting my head, I spotted a note on the table. Pushing to sit upright, I grabbed it.

It read: I will be at the club this Friday. Come. And we can explore those needs of yours, and you might even enjoy yourself.  I will message the address later.

He signed his name and then tagged on. FYI. I still think you'll look good on your knees.

Cheeky fucker and I could almost hear that deep laugh of his inside my head.

But, should I go?

I wanted to know more about the lifestyle and I'd liked what I'd seen so far. But getting on my knees—very fucking doubtful—well, for Jason anyway.

It was quite obvious there would only be one man I would do that for. And that ship had sailed.

I stood there thinking about it and then my phone chimed. Dipping into my pocket. it was from an unknown number but reading it had heart running overtime.

Risk. Friday. 8 pm. Dress smart. Jason.

He was a member of Zack's LA club?

Fuck.

But... It wasn't like Zack would be there. So, I saved Jason's contact details and for the first time since landing back in the US, I was actually looking forward to something.