Hie guys
Happy dhanteras

*****************************

The laughter dried away with the realisation of another possible meaning behind it. Was it wrong? Her finding happiness somewhere else? But she loved Dev right...still does...perhaps!

"Alright...I have clearly made you think hundred stupid things now...forget I ever said that" he jumped sensing the sheet of tranquility sprawling inside her. Natasha looked down and tried not to think anything else. Since she met him, he kept pushing her on the edges, not giving time to realise what's beneath the cliff of truth and reality. She kept fearing and neglecting all the possibilities but he had the audacity to throw the facts right on her face since they were mere strangers. You see these type of people, won't ever lie to you because it takes immense strength to spill the truth out of your tongue.

"Natasha...say something..." He insisted her to stop by thinking anymore.

"Um...how do you keep your edge. I mean you know it's hard to realise but you always manage to state it out and present it without being broken...so tell me Jatin, how do you keep your edge?"

He looked at her disheveled state. What was it about her that he was so persistent on hurting her as much she was resisting it. Everyone knows its right...right and beneficial to face the truth but why him...why he was being the one to be her Pathfinder.

"I don't know.....I was 14 when I used to like a girl, alot...so much that it didn't make me sad when my dad died but it did when she transferred her coaching centre. I left studying and kept crying all day when my mom taught me that Jatin, everyone falls in love it's not exception or rare but those who stand and rise with it are the one who lasts. I loved you dad, more than you can imagine but now he is dead with his family upon me, what do I do....keep his legacy his family intact. You loved but failed...get up and love again...face it son! Face it!.
And since then Natasha...I left all the doors of my heart open to fall in love but never did. Never really liked anyone. So I keep my edge because I don't think of stopping, I keep moving just with life."

She kept looking at him while he was bending nails of his fingers reminiscing some other pages of his life. She held his hand to which he looked at her and smiled.

"Now I can clearly see you are Impressed by my sad story, aren't you?" He said winking at her to which she chuckled but he kept her hand enclosed with his.

"So that's a trick I see..." She said looking at their hands but okay, friends do that. Hold each other's hand for emotional and moral support... right?

"Indeed it is, just when you see a girl getting emotional, hit it on with your sad story, they totally dwell in it and you became the hero" he said fake boasting.

"Yeah right...but I would rather leave you on your own to grieve and go in my dorm..it's pretty late" she said while gently withdrawing her hand from his and rising up from the bed.

"Oh no...the "dead daddy, hug me" trick was yet to use...you can't go so soon" he said leaving her hand though.

She chuckled and whacked him with a pillow.  "Your daddy might be thinking of haunting you at night for using him to trap girls". She stood up and started fixing her clothes.

"Alright...you are scaring me now" he stood beside her.

Meanwhile in the garden!

After sipping his coffee, Dev decided to finally open the diary of sonakshi he took last night. Ethically it was wrong..but so is thinking about threesome with wife and fantasy-wife. Who cares!

He saw the year carved in the diary was 2000. That means it was an old one. He opened the cover and on it's first page there was a Polaroid pasted. It was a Polaroid of a really small, like 2-3 year old, plumpy cheeks curly haired made into a rainbow pony leaving some of her hair behind, girl. The girl was in a pink flowery frock smiling cheekily clutching a duck-toy in her hands. Beneath that, SONAKSHI BOSE was written in kiddish handwriting, probably of a girl 7-8 years old. Every letter of the name was written in different color. Dev couldn't help but smile over the cute little plumpy sonakshi. Her smile could depict the immense level of happiness she was having that time.

He turned the pages and found the diary half filled with different handwritings, probably as it grew year by year. She was still having the diary which meant that she was still writing on it. Dev was always curious to know Sonakshi more...more from her past life, more about her family and all but it wasn't available anywhere but here.
He screwed all the ethical warnings in his head and came back to the second page.

Dear Dory!
I Sonakshi, call me sona, it's simple.
I'm 7 years old. I live in Kolkata, and now you also. Will you be my best friend?

End. He turned another page.

Dear Dory!
I don't like you very much, you don't talk na, it's okay. Tumi jani, aaj baba aamar jonya candy kinechina{you know, today daddy bought me candy}. But maa got angry. She do not love me Dory. Baba says in future, she do. But she give me ouchy when I go near her.
Bie, baba is home.

Her mother doesn't like her. And she was fluent Bangla speaker, and she knows Marathi too. Dev was scratching his head for putting himself in whole jigsaw puzzle of sonakshi's life, but he couldn't step out now so he turned further.

Hie Dory!
I'm sorry I do not speak to you very much ago week. Aamra barite othiti chhilo{we had guest at home}. Mother do not like them so baba told me to care for them. My dada and boudi{ brother n his wife}. Dory, I don't like my mother, will god send me in hell?

Sonakshi has/had a brother! She was seven and at this point he was married that means her father was pretty old at her time only, if we just go by general science and assumptions. Dev was so not liking the proceedings of the dairy. There was no date mentioned to figure out the exact time of the happenings except that she was 7. But he decided to go more.

It's my birthday Dory, no one wished me. Not even you. I wish you speak. But I know baba will come with a KitKat, like Everytime not telling maa. You know three days ago baba and maa fighting. I heard them. She said I will leave you if you will meet her. I'm afraid Dory. Will baba not come?

This is was so frustrating  for she didn't write everything in detail like they do in movies. She should have written everything along with the dates. Moreover Dev was getting angrier and producing  hatred towards her mother...which was ethically so wrong, again. You do not hate a mother. He turned more pages to see if she has written in more details in upcoming pages, if not then he might not proceed because it was doing nothing but boggling his mind but the curiosity inside him compelled him to read further patiently.

Hie Dory!
I'm 8 years three months now. I did not forgot you, don't worry. Actually, I was learn English...no no learning...sorry, no eraser.
And also I have to tell you, baba is weak. He got fever last month, he don't talk to me more but I go to him when he is alone. We play Aao Milo silo salo together. Dory, can you keep a secret?
I heard maa talking with baba, she was talking about some other woman, she said I can't believe you still take that filthy whore's name, and then baba asked her to shut up.
I'm searching what is filthy whore mean.

Oh my god...
Another woman!
Another WOMAN! are you kidding me..? Another woman.
And if looked over, perhaps this was the woman her mother was talking about when she warned him not to meet some HER. Dev was going crazy. No wonder why Sonakshi was so twisted and composed in herself. She never lead a normal life. In fact the childhood of hers was clearly destroyed with all the atrocities and stupid adult issues. He tuned on.

Hey Dory!
I think I'm more bigger than my friends. Everyone says that im having more than they have. Do you understand that? Right, me neither.
Today I got a big ouchy on my head, maa catched me finding whore's meaning. She said I'll be a whore one day. I don't think i will sell my body like whores. Mother is wrong about me.

This was getting intenser than ever. There's a line in Durgachalisa in Sanskrit
Kupotro jayet, kwachidapi kumata na bhavti!
Which says, a son can be bad but a mother can never be.
He always believed in that, but now his believe was shattering...there was something seriously wrong in there.

He turned another page but before he could read further, Natasha came towards to him. He immediately shut the diary and put it aside before natasha could see but guess she did. She saw him closing the notebook like something haphazardly once he saw her coming. She got curious and hurt but then okay..her life is all about it. She decided not to be bothered with it.

"Dev, I was thinking, when are we leaving? " She said awkwardly.
His eyes flared open and mind shot a gun inside. They have to go back as well. He had not even a hint in his mind about returning back since last night. What now? He have to read the diary before they will go for dinner at Dinesh's house and return it to sonakshi as well before she gets suspicious about it. But before all that, he has to answer her.

"Um....umm...natasha... tomorrow morning I guess...tonight we have to attend the dinner and then...we are done I guess...yeah.. tomorrow... tomorrow morning"

"Alright...okay" she said noddingly and turned to leave which gave him a breath of relaxation. He was bad with lies, especially with girls.

"Um and Dev...(Dev shivered immediately as her voice scared him for a second, she turned) areee.... you alright?....(she said moving closer)"

" Yeah yeah...(he said putting his hand on the diary in order to cover it)"
She saw that from the corner of her eyes and stopped moving closer to him. He was getting conscious and she should just leave him right there.
"Okay...I was just asking if you need anything...snacks coffee or anything..." She said moving backwards now.

"No no...natasha...I'm fine...." He said hesitantly.

Natasha went off. He immediately opened the diary and started turning the pages to find where he left last time. Found it.

Another year, I'm getting bigger every year. Ill be 9 in two weeks, teacher taught us addition and substraction.
Dory, we will celebrate your birthday today. Last year, same day, I found you in Baba's study. He said I can have you. You are my only friend, and also Boudi but I don't tell her about mother. She says, I should love her.
Baba is sick...like everyday. She don't give him medicines. I hate her and I can not stop. She gives me ouchys if I say no to her. Baba says no saying no to mother but.....Dory, she is not my maa, I know she hates me and don't love me like her daughter. She is not my maa...more...she is just bad mother.

Oh poor little thing.
Next page.

Dear Dory, I met my Boudi and dada  today. Boudi is going fat everyday. They say a baby is growing in her tummy. It's spooky. Baby will eat, poo, and pissu in her tummy...ewww right?

Next

Hie Dory, im sorry I was with Boudi since three weeks. You know, the baby turned into blood two weeks ago. Boudi was in hospital. She said mother did it to her. She do not like mother also. She will never come to us. I'm very sad Dory. I hate mother. Baba is upset too. He is crying, I saw a picture of an aunty in his purse. I don't know her. Whore aunty? Don't know.

Hate mother...hate her hate her hate her. Next page

Dory, today im so wishing you could talk. You could slap mother when she said I'm that filthy whore's daughter and she will sell me once baba will die. Why she is like this? Baba found me hearing them and threw his stick on me, my head hurts. Baba never beated me, but today he did. Will baba die ? I'm actually whore Aunty's daughter? I'm scared dory, Please come out of this notebook.
I know you can't, just like Kali maa..!

What! Sonakshi was or was not her mother's daughter, or the mother she was mentioning here's daughter. That makes sense. That actually explains all the hatred and ridiculed nature of her mother towards her. And perhaps her brother was also...whore...oh lord, the other lady's child and that's why the MOTHER here killed his baby. Oh my god, this was so much more than expected.

"You have my diary" the most unwanted voice at that time came and froze Dev for lifetime.

************************************
One of the most difficult chapter I have written so far.
To keep that language and innocence like a 7-8 year old was difficult man.

Anyways, do tell me how you find this revelation now.

Keep voting commenting and sharing. That gives a will to write more.

Till then
All is well that ends well. Wait for the end.

Just free motivation.
And also

Happy Friendship day( agar Mana rahe ho to😂 nhi to Sunday ko padh Lena dubara)

Signing off
Shruti!