Soft murmurs. Clinking of cutlery. Shuffles from footsteps. Those were the sounds that begun to fill Chan-woo's hearing as he slowly became conscious from a deep sleep. He laid still for a few minutes on the couch while his mind adjusted to from a deep state of slumber. For a moment, he momentarily forgot where he was and flinched at a particularly loud noise. As his eyes opened in fright, he was glad to see he was in the dorm and not at that place he had been forced to call 'home'.

As Chan-woo settled his racing heart with the knowledge he was safe, he couldn't help but bask in the restful feeling that flew through his body. Once again, he had one of the best sleeps in his entire life. Although, unlike yesterday, he felt a little less fatigued. He felt more rested which gave him hope that perhaps his condition was on the way to improving. Chan-woo shifted his arms above his head and stretched out his aching muscles as he hoped his observations were correct.

With a small yawn, he sat up since there were some members awake and already getting themselves ready for the day ahead. The blanket, that had been snuggly wrapped around his small frame during the night, pooled in his lap to which he simply pushed aside in a messy pile to deal with that. After he found out what the day ahead entailed and how much time he had to get ready, he promised himself he would fold it to maintain a neat area.

"Sorry, did we wake you?" a deep voice asked in the silence of the living room.

Chan-woo looked over to his left at the kitchen table where Namjoon, Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook were sat. Each boy had a bowl before them as they continued to eat quietly while they stared at him. He blushed from all of the attention on him before he nodded to answer Taehyung's question. Words seemed hard to manage at that very moment since his mind was still partially asleep.

"Awe I'm sorry," cooed Taehyung as he looked upon the messy haired, sleepy Chan-woo.

"It's okay," he gave the other boy a small smile as he stood up and shuffled over to the table.

The room became mostly silent once more as Chan-woo sat down next to Taehyung. All four of the boys begun to eat their food which left Chan-woo alone to his thoughts. He could feel his heart flutter a little faster. The anxiety and nervousness lurked in the shadows of his mind, wondering how the treatment towards him would be today. Would there still be coldness from them all? Or would there be a mixture of compassion and rejection like usual? Only time would tell Chan-woo.

"I saw you jump a little when Namjoon Hyung knocked something over," commented Taehyung nonchalantly as he paused eating briefly. His eyes stayed trained on Chan-woo as he leant backwards. "Do sudden, loud noises usually make you jump? Or was it just because you were asleep?"

"Just in general. But it's worse when I'm asleep. It's a habit I need to try and break now that I'm here," he nodded while he spoke quietly. His head hung low with embarrassment, ashamed that someone had seen that happen. But he did mean it, now that he was no long experiencing daily physical harm, he really needed to try and work on that instinctual habit of flinching from loud noises.

"Aish, I'm sorry," he replied with sad filled eyes as he understood the meaning behind the younger's words, unlike the other three at the table. "But it'll be okay. I'm sure it will get better over time."

"Y-Yeah, me too," Chan-woo nodded with a forced smile. The silence settled amongst the five again while they went back to their food. But the youngest of them all had a burning question on his mind. "Can I ask something?"

"Sure," Namjoon answered after he saw that Taehyung currently had a mouth full of food.

"What's the schedule for today?" he asked while he absentmindedly played with his hands in his lap.

"We have half the day at the studio working on the Japanese album again. We don't have the full day because we are picking up the keys for the new house from Bang Hyung in the afternoon. Then we'll come home and get some take-out to celebrate," Namjoon told him, the leader within him showing itself, much to the other three's amusement.

"And how long until we have to leave?" asked Chan-woo after he took a second to process the schedule. He was quietly excited that the keys to the new house were being collected since it meant he was one step closer to some privacy with having his own room.

"We leave in an hour," Namjoon emphasised on the 'we' part as he gestured towards everyone but Chan-woo. "You will be staying here and resting. Bang Hyung and I talked last night and we both agreed it is best you take the day off to recover more."

For a second, Chan-woo's heart dropped at being left out like usual. But after he heard that both Namjoon and Bang PD-nim agreed he should take the day to rest, he understood why. And as much as Chan-woo would have loved to go along to the studio session to learn and observe, he wouldn't protest orders from both the leader of the group and the CEO of the company. He begrudgingly relented to the instructions with a heavy heart.

"Alright," Chan-woo nodded with a small sigh. He was still sadden that he was left out, but at least he received an explanation as to why. "I understand."

Part of him started to feel this warmth grow as he realised that Namjoon had moments ago admitted that he agreed Chan-woo needed to look after his health. He had said that both Bang PD-nim and himself had agreed. And that was a massive step in the youngest's eyes. Namjoon didn't know what was wrong with him, but he still sympathised enough to allow him to rest for the day. It made Chan-woo happy to know the leader saw how hard it was for him and supported him in the best way he could, even without knowing the full situation.

"What is wrong with you?" asked Jungkook out of nowhere.

Chan-woo's heart dropped again, but for an entirely different reason. Every single pair of eyes were on him, the entire table paused from the sudden question as they awaited the answer. The youngest of the group could hear his heart beat loudly in his ears. His palms grew sweaty from the nerves. And his mouth suddenly became very dry as he tried to decide whether or not he should admit the reason behind him being sick to three people that were always cold to him and one person who he didn't actually mind telling.

"You don't have to answer, Chan-woo," Taehyung stepped in after he saw the panicked look in the younger's eyes. "Like Bang Hyung said, you can tell us when you are ready to tell us."

"T-Thanks Hyung," he said, truly appreciating how the older remembered that conversation from back in that BBQ restaurant.

"But I think I know what it is, I may have looked up the symptoms last night," guiltily admitted Taehyung with a sheepish look all over his face.

"It's alright, Hyung," he softly chuckled since he honestly didn't mind. He took in a deep breath before he forced himself to start talking after he gathered his thoughts. "I guess I should tell you guys so you don't freak out if I suddenly faint in front of you all."

"Faint?" loudly repeated Namjoon in shook, Jimin and Jungkook equally as shocked.

"Y-Yeah," Chan-woo sighed. He knew that he would have to tell them everything once he had mentioned that he could faint out of the blue. He took a deep breath in and mustered the remainder of his courage. "I recently got diagnosed with Anaemia after I fainted at a dance practice. The doctors at the hospital found out that I had low iron levels, and because it was going untreated for so long, it developed into the more serious condition of Anaemia. I need to have more red meat in my diet. And if the symptoms don't get better, I will need to see a doctor again in a month."

"Oh," Jungkook said quietly as he blankly stared at Chan-woo.

"Oh indeed. Hoseok and Yoongi Hyung already knew what was happening. But like I said to them, there's nothing anyone can do to help when it gets really bad like it did the other night," Chan-woo continued to explain.

"Except for head rubs, they help you through it," interjected Taehyung with a sad smile.

"Yes, yes it did," smiled Chan-woo, glad that Taehyung reminded him that there was some small hope during the bad episodes. "Head rubs seemed to help."

"I really am sorry you are going through all of that," Namjoon said with a genuinely sad smile towards the younger. "I am glad you felt comfortable enough telling us what is happening to you. Also, I'm glad I made you rest today. You really shouldn't be doing much with a condition like that. And I honestly do hope that the Anaemia gets better for you soon."

"Thank you," quietly spoke Chan-woo as a bright, red blush arose upon his cheeks.

The room went silent as all four boys continued to look at Chan-woo without a word. The three that had just learnt what was going on simply sat there processing the information, while Taehyung felt sadden his research had been correct. Both Taehyung and Namjoon knew how Anaemia could be debilitating for someone, and could only begin to imagine how the youngest felt during the bad episode the other night. Those two truly felt bad for the boy, Taehyung perhaps more so since he also knew a little about and saw the evidence of the abuse Chan-woo had suffered at the hands of his parents.

While the other two may have understood what was going on for Chan-woo, Jimin and Jungkook certainly didn't fully grasp it. They both acknowledged there was a level of seriousness to whatever condition he was diagnosed with. But they both secretly thought that the younger was playing up the symptoms for attention, not that either of them would admit it out loud to anyone. Jungkook had already seen the younger overreact after he had pulled him off of the couch the second morning he was there.

"Well I'll get out of the way and let you guys get ready," Chan-woo said quietly, he felt uncomfortable from the stares as no one said anything else. He stood up from the table and tucked in the chair neatly.

"Alright," smiled Taehyung as he finally continued to eat. "I'm proud of you for telling us, just so you know."

"Thanks, Hyung," his blushed grew larger as he gave the other a small nod.

Chan-woo walked away from the mostly silent table and sat down on the couch once more. As he busied himself with neatly folding the blanket, he couldn't help but think back on the conversation. He, too, was proud of himself for being truthful with what was 'wrong' with him as Jungkook had put it. It was a big step to be vulnerable with the other members, especially considering he didn't owe them any explanation after the way they had all treated him since he had first joined.

Already bored out of his mind, Chan-woo got up from the couch and grabbed his phone from its charger. While he aimlessly scrolled through his different social media apps to waste some time, his mind couldn't help but go back to the conversation from earlier. He felt like he had taken a massive step in the right direction with Namjoon, and felt like things with Taehyung were going good still. He just hoped things wouldn't change for no reason like it seemed to happen with Yoongi and Hoseok.

>_<     >_<     >_<

A loud knock on the front door startled Chan-woo from his sleep. As he slowly sat up on the couch, he wondered when he had fallen asleep. The last thing he could remembered was scrolling through his phone while he laid on his side. He had been bored out of his mind being stuck at home alone. It wasn't his intention to have a nap, but his body definitely did not protest the extra rest.

When he stood up after he had heard a second knock on the door, he saw that his phone was face down on the ground. He picked it up, quickly checked and found there were no cracks on the screen much to his relief, before he lethargically walked over to the front door. He heard a third knock and smiled at the impatient person on the other side of the door. Although Chan-woo didn't blame him since he was taking a bit to get there in his sleepy state.

"Channie-ah!" enthusiastically smiled Daniel the second the door opened.

"Hey Danny Hyung," he replied with a wide smile of his own. "Come on in."

"Thanks bud," the older chuckled lightly as he walked in to the dorm.

"I'm glad you had the day off," Chan-woo said, his heart momentarily paused at that nickname, but he continued on as if nothing had affected him.

"Me too," Daniel smiled. "Bang PD-nim actually told me how you had another bad episode a few nights ago. I was just about to check up on you when you texted me to come over if I was free. And then not long after you went silent, so I guess you ended up falling asleep, right?"

"Yeah," Chan-woo said while he closed the door and locked it. He rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. "I didn't mean to, it kind of just happened."

"I could also tell by the messy state your hair is in," laughed Daniel as he placed his backpack on the kitchen bench beside the vase of flowers. "But your body must have agreed with Bang PD-nim Hyung and I that you should rest."

"More like my body was bored out of its mind being left all alone in the dorms," he rolled his eyes as he fixed his hair to the best of his ability, before he smiled up at Daniel. "So thank you for rescuing me from my boredom."

"Anything for you, Channie-ah!" he smiled before he walked over and engulfed the younger in a tight hug.

The second those strong arms wrapped around Chan-woo, he melted into the warm embrace. His eyes instinctively closed as he returned the hug with an equally as tight embrace. He could smell the enticing scent of a cologne any time he breathed in. He could feel how fast his heart pounded in his chest and just prayed Daniel couldn't. The pair stood still for a minute, one wishing it would never end while the other was just glad to see the other was in a good condition.

"Should we go sit down?" asked Daniel as he slowly pulled away, he still held the younger by the biceps.

"Yeah," he said quietly as he tried to fight away the blush.

Chan-woo led Daniel over to the two couches and was embarrassed by the blanket he had left messily sprawled out. He sat down and begun to fold the soft material, Daniel sat himself on the other end of the same couch and turned himself to face the younger. Chan-woo's heart continued to beat loud and fast, nervous whenever he was alone with the older.

"How's everything been?" asked Daniel to break the silence between them.

"Things in general have been okay," Chan-woo looked over sheepishly at the older.

"That's good to hear. And are you ready for debut yet? That must be getting closer and closer," he said with an excited sparkle in his eyes.

"Very close I believe," he gulped nervously. "I brought up a situation with Bang PD-nim Hyung that might delay the process. But once that is sorted, I'm sure I'll be ready to make a media debut."

"Can I ask what happened?" Daniel looked worried as he saw the nervousness in the younger. "Only if you are comfortable sharing."

"Yeah, of course I'll tell you. You make me feel comfortable that I can talk with you about anything," Chan-woo said as he sent a small smile towards the older. "Basically it has to do with my parents."

"Oh boy," Daniel said while he shifted in his seat, anxious to learn what trouble Chan-woo's parents were continuing to cause. "What's going on?"

"Well remember I told you how I got that bruise on my rib?" Chan-woo asked with sadness.

"Yeah, something about money, right?" said Daniel, remembering the first time he ever saw that bruise in the hospital.

"Yep, my father did that because I tried to keep some of the money I had earnt from work. Basically it was like that my entire life. Any money I earnt or received, they would take from me," he explained to give the context to the next part. "So I told Bang Hyung how I was concerned they would try to demand I give them money after I debut."

"Your over 18 though, you don't owe them anything. And especially not after the way they've abused you," angrily said Daniel, more angry with the lame excuse of parents then he was at Chan-woo. He could never be angry at the younger.

"I know. But that didn't stop them. Even right up until I left to come here, they were still demanding money," he sighed, it was a difficult subject to talk about. "But that's the thing, Daniel Hyung. They are so hungry for money that if I don't give them anything, I think they will destroy my public image."

"So it's essentially like blackmail? If you don't give them what they want, they will make sure you can't stay in this line of work, right?" he understood exactly what the younger meant.

"Right. My options will either be give them money or go back to them because they'll spread lies in the media about me. They haven't threatened to do it yet because they don't know where I am. But I know them well enough to know the second I debut, they'll be making those demands," said Chan-woo with a grimace.

"Ah, so you want to get on top of this before you debut so nothing damages your chances at what could be a long and I'm sure a very successful career?" Daniel asked, understanding why the younger was concerned. He would be concerned too if he was in his shoes.

Chan-woo nodded his head. That was precisely why he wanted to get on top of it. With them out of the picture and not threatening to ruin his public image, he'd have more of a chance to make a career out of this line of work. Although he didn't know if he agreed with Daniel about the long and successful part. He still had his doubts that he'd be accepted by the fandom. And if he wasn't accepted, he didn't want to think what that would mean for his career.

"And what did Bang PD-nim say when you told him all of this?" asked Daniel as he saw that Chan-woo was caught up in his thoughts.

"Well he was going to speak to the legal team about drafting up a Non-Disclosure Agreement and also we'll look at doing a one time lump-sum payment to them. That way they'll get some money and in return, they aren't allowed talk about me to the media," said Chan-woo.

"I'm glad he is on top of that. And I'm sure Bang PD-nim Hyung will make sure it all gets sorted out for you," he smiled, relieved the CEO was there for the younger. "He cares for you deeply, just like I do. We both want to see you succeed and put the terrible past you've had well and truly behind you."

"T-Thank you, Danny Hyung," blushed Chan-woo, hanging his head in embarrassment.

It honestly warmed Chan-woo's heart to hear such words from the older. He knew that the other meant every word he said. He knew it came from a place of earnt respect and love. Not out of pity like it seemed to be with the most of the boys he was now apart of a band with. Daniel just made Chan-woo feel safe, cared for, respected, and loved. It was a relationship he had never shared with anyone else before and he cherished it dearly.

"So how have things been with all of the boys?" Daniel asked to break the silence between them.

"I mean, it's okay," sighed Chan-woo, tired just thinking about it.

"It's been okay? That doesn't sound very convincing. You know you can tell me what's going on, yeah?" reassured the older as he reached over and tussled the still messy hair.

A tense silence grew between the pair as Chan-woo tried to decide on whether he should be honest or if he should sugar coat the situation he was in. He didn't want Daniel telling Bang PD-nim anything which would result in any of the boys getting in trouble. But he trusted the older enough to keep it to himself. He didn't have anyone else he could confide in except for Bang PD-nim and Daniel. And he really could use this moment to help get the stuff that is bothering him off of his chest.

"Well it hasn't been great," Chan-woo said quietly as he looked down at the blanket in his lap with shame. "I mean, at first I completely understood where they were coming from. I joined their group after they had grown their audience and worked hard to be where they are today. I understood the anger and the hurt. Did it mean that it hurt me any less not being accepted straight away by them? No, it didn't."

"That's very mature that you could understand where they were coming from. But they did come around right?" asked Daniel with concern.

"I mean, yes and no," he paused with a gulp, nervous to tell the truth for the first time. "It took a few days, but two of them came around and started treating me better. Although I think that was mostly out of pity after they learnt about my Anaemia and also some of my home life. Those were the only two that have treated me decently for most of the time."

"Just those two?" he asked with raised eyebrows. "No one else?"

"Just one more and then also I think another one of the boys started to warm up to me this morning. But no, the rest of them for the entire time have been cold and angry towards me," he sighed as he fought back the tears desperately. "And once again, these newer two changed their attitude towards me after I opened up. The guy from this morning was after I told him about my Anaemia and the other one was the one that saw my bruises. So it feels like they only pity me and that's all it is."

"Why would you say it's only pity? Do they not see your talent? Do they not see how kind of a person you are?" asked Daniel with barely contained anger. "Are they really not treating you good?"

"No, they aren't. I mean, even after the first two warmed up to me, there were still these moments where things felt tense and back to me being left out. Like they basically ignored me for three days straight. And when I asked them why, they said it was because of the busy schedule. But the answer didn't sit right with me. I felt like I did something for them to treat me so coldly again," Chan-woo told the other with a shaky voice, emotion filled it.

"So what, these two did a 180 back to how they first were treating you... Out of no where?" asked Daniel in bewilderment.

"Yeah," he sighed again as he looked out upon the quiet living room. "But yesterday and today they are back to treating me warmly. And I know it's out of pity again, because it was when I came back here two nights ago in a bad state with my Anaemia. It's so confusing. Cold, warm, cold, warm. It's hard to keep up with. At least with the other three it's just been the constant anger and the cold shoulder."

"You poor thing," Daniel sighed as well while he reached over and squeezed his shoulder in a supportive manner. "That must be so hard to deal with. I hope over time they come to treat you with the respect you deserve. Because you are talented and you deserve to be here as much as they do."

"I don't know about that, Danny Hyung. But time will tell," he looked over to the other with a sad smile, a small blush flushed his cheeks. "And maybe in the future, I'll believe that I deserve to be here as well."

"You don't believe it yet?" he asked, probably more shocked at that revelation than the previous one.

"No," he whispered as he hung his head.

"It probably doesn't help when the members you are in a band with don't believe it too, right?" Daniel reasoned as he shifted over on the couch and pulled the younger into a side hug.

"You are spot on," he whispered before he cautiously laid his head on the older's shoulder. "They don't believe it, I don't believe it, and I'm sure when I debut many others won't believe I deserve to be here either."

"You never know, Chan-woo," Daniel rested his head on top of Chan-woo's. "The fans and the critics may like you straight away. Or yes, they may hate you. But in the end, most people will see your talent and your adorableness and they'll see why Bang PD-nim Hyung made the decision he did."

"Yeah, maybe," heavily sighed Chan-woo while he relaxed into the comforting side hug.

"Just keep hanging in there and never lose who you are in the process," the older said with a sad smile upon his face. "I'll always be there to remind you."

"Thank you Danny Hyung," he said with a huge smile, his heart pounding loudly in his chest.

The pair stayed like that for a few minutes, Daniel giving the physical support that they both knew Chan-woo needed in that moment of time. The older was incredibly proud of the younger for being brave. It had been a tough thing to admit, but Chan-woo was glad to have gotten that off his chest to someone. He too hoped that his relationships with the boys only improved from now on, but he didn't want to hold his breath.

>_<     >_<     >_<

Laughter filled the living room. The two males that sat close together on the couch were in their own world. They had spent much of the afternoon talking about much lighter topics. Suddenly the front door opened while the two were in the middle of a loud laugh. They turned their heads, still chuckling lightly, to find the group of boys had just arrived back. Chan-woo's elated mood flattened slightly after he felt a wave of guilt surge through him for talking about how they had treated him to Daniel. He worried if Daniel would say anything or if he would keep it to himself.

Hoseok had been the first to walk in to the dorm. In his hands, he held up the keys to the new house. He had a massive smile on his face, ready to show them off to Chan-woo. But he stopped halfway into the living room as he caught sight of the younger whom sat very close to Daniel on the couch, both laughing freely. His smile dropped as he watched them, sadness and hurt building up inside him.

Directly behind Hoseok was Taehyung. He, too, had an equally wide smile on his face as they walked inside. Before he had even seen the scene on the couch, he heard the laughter of two people. He wondered why Hoseok had stopped all of a sudden as well. With a frown, he stepped to the side and his eyes instantly landed upon a jovial Daniel and a happy Chan-woo. He hadn't seen the younger look so happy in a long time, if ever. And that hurt him.

The silence seemed to drag on between the four males as Hoseok slowly dropped his outstretched hand to his side. The other members that had walked in behind the two and soon saw the reason the living room was silent. And while the other four of them weren't as troubled by the scene as the other two frozen still, Yoongi sure was. He didn't bother staying in the silent room. The second his eyes landed on the happy smile upon Chan-woo's face, he turned on his heel and walked straight to his room without a word.

"I-I'm sorry," Chan-woo gulped nervously as he read the tense situation. "I invited Daniel Hyung o-over because I was really lonely. I just wanted s-some company."

"It's alright," Hoseok said with no emotion as he walked over to the kitchen bench.

Without much care, Hoseok slid the new house keys onto the bench. They came to a stop next to the flower vase. His empty eyes stared at the flowers before he turned his head and locked eyes with Chan-woo. As the two stared at each other, they could feel a shift in the air, they both knew things would be different once more. Hoseok didn't say anything, he didn't need to as his eyes said it all, before he silently walked down the hallway and into his room.

Chan-woo watched with sad eyes as the older walked off without saying another word. His heart broke the longer the silence in the living room continued. He felt Daniel reach over and squeeze his hand in support. He made himself hold in the tears that wanted to form so desperately. Although it became an even harder task to hold them at bay as Taehyung all of a sudden walked off to his room as well. His fears that he had recently discussed with Daniel seemed to be forming in front of his very eyes yet again, and there wasn't a thing he could do to stop or change it.

"You guys can keep talking if you want," Jin said, his eyes watched Taehyung's back as he walked away silently. "Most of us will probably stay in our rooms to rest until dinner arrives. We ordered extra food for the celebration so there will be plenty for the both of you."

"Thank you, Jin Hyung," Chan-woo said quietly as he nodded his head, shame written all over his face.

"Yes thank you indeed, but I really should get going. I don't want to intrude on such a special occasion for you guys," Daniel gave Jin a strained smile before he stood up from the couch. "Just give me a text or call when you want to meet up again, Channie-ah. And enjoy your night tonight. Eat well for me."

"Thank you, Hyung," warmly smiled Chan-woo as he stood up and immediately embraced Daniel in a hug. "Expect a text very soon."

"Alright," Daniel laughed as the two pulled a part, even though he felt saddened since he knew why he would be receiving a text from the younger soon.

Chan-woo watched with sad eyes as Daniel walked over to the kitchen bench and grabbed his backpack. The older turned around and gave him one last encouraging smile before he opened the front door and exited the dorm. The second the door had closed, the tense air only grew more intense. Chan-woo couldn't look anywhere but at the ground, his entire body felt burning hot with guilt and shame.

"What the hell were you thinking, Chan-woo?" Jin's loud voice suddenly filled the room which caused the younger to flinch, and not for the reasons the remaining four thought.

"I-I'm so sorry, Hyung," Chan-woo tried to say loud enough, his voice shaky with emotion, his eyes clouded by tears.

"You're sorry? You should be resting and instead you invited someone over to our place," Jin continued to yell, anger painfully evident in his tone. "This isn't even your home and yet you selfishly brought someone over without our permission just because you were lonely. At the very least you should have called Namjoon or I to ask."

"I'm sorry. And I-I didn't call because I don't have yours or Namjoon's number," said Chan-woo, his head still hung in shame to hide the tears that were about to fall.

"But you have Hoseok's number!" furiously yelled Jin.

Chan-woo flinched from the loud, angry voice. He tried so hard to stay still, but the second Jin had raised his voice even more, he was reverted back to old habits. His instincts were telling him he needed to submit to the authority and agree it was all his fault to lessen the blows that would sure enough follow soon. And while he was present in the moment with four of his Hyungs, there was a part of him that forgot he was no longer at home with his parents. That part of him couldn't help but flinch as he heard footsteps travel closer.

"Are you seriously crying? That's pathetic," scoffed Jin quietly as he sat down at the kitchen table.

"Shit," whispered Chan-woo as he snapped back into the present moment fully.

Through tear filled vision, Chan-woo walked straight to the bathroom and locked himself in there. It was the only space in the entire dorm he could go for some privacy. He slid down the wooden door until he sat on the floor with his back against it. And much like he had back at his home, he begun to cry without making a noise. Hot tears fell down his cheeks as his mouth hung open in a silent scream. He tugged on his hair in an attempt to feel pain anywhere other than his heart. Yet it felt like nothing compared to the pain he felt thrumming in his chest.

He had fucked up again, hadn't he? He had done something that caused Yoongi, Hoseok and now Taehyung to hate him. He brought this upon himself by inviting someone over without asking first. Perhaps he deserved this pain. Perhaps he deserved to be treated coldly from those three now. Perhaps if he wasn't so selfish like Jin had said, he wouldn't be in this current position of crying on the bathroom floor.

Chan-woo absolutely hated himself more than anything in that moment. No one could hate him as much as himself. He hated that he had told Daniel the truth. He hated that he had caused Hoseok, Taehyung and Yoongi to be upset by inviting someone over without asking. He hated that he was selfish instead of resting like Jin had said. He hated that he had flinched when Jin had yelled. He hated that he had flinched when Jin had walked towards him. He hated that he was there on the floor pathetically crying.

And Jin was right. He did have Hoseok's number. He should have texted or called the other to ask. And Chan-woo totally would have. But he had fallen asleep halfway through his text conversation with Daniel, and the next thing he knew, the other was already knocking on the front door. Yes he could have texted or called Hoseok after the fact to warn him. But he was so caught up feeling genuinely happy for once that it didn't even cross his mind.

It had been so long since Chan-woo had silently sobbed against a door. And the familiar position oddly seemed to fill him with a sense of security. He knew that he could cry as hard and for as long as he wanted, and no one would know. He could tug on his hair to distract himself with physical pain, and no one would know. In the privacy of the locked bathroom, he could let out his pent up emotions knowing there was absolutely no one that could judge him for it.

Time seemed irrelevant as the broken young man sat on the cold bathroom floor inaudibly weeping. His thoughts kept circling back to the situation that had unfolded while his tears kept flowing like a waterfall. He immensely loathed himself for allowing his guards to come down with the boys again. Deep down he knew that he'd do something again to cause them to become distant. And he knew it would never stop hurting when they turned their backs on him. So why did he keep letting himself be vulnerable?

After a long unknown time on the floor, Chan-woo's tears slowly begun to cease. He sniffled as he wiped the drying tear tracks from his face, the first sound he had made the entire time. He took a few deep breaths in before he pushed his aching and lethargic body off of the ground. He forced himself to walk over to the vanity where he looked into his pathetic reflection. His eyes were bright red from the crying and the bags under his eyes were slightly puffy.

Scoffing at himself, he turned the taps of the sink on and proceeded to splash his face with cold water. He gasped out loud the second the freezing liquid hit his burning hot cheeks. It brought with it some relief as well as helping him to soothe down out of such an emotional state. Chan-woo looked up at his reflection yet again and watched with numb eyes as the water droplets rolled off his face. Part of him wished that he could wash away the pain as easily as washing away the tears tracks.

Chan-woo used the inside of his shirt to dry his face considering his towel was in his duffle bag, and he'd be damned if he sneakily used a spare one. He'd already done enough damage as it was and he didn't want to worsen the situation over a stupid towel. He looked over himself one last time and sighed. No matter how hard he could try, it would still be evident he had been crying. He felt pathetic, just like Jin had said, as he walked out of the bathroom and quietly sat on the couch once more.

The entire living room was silent between the three current occupants. Jin hadn't moved from the kitchen table and Namjoon had taken a seat upon the opposite couch. Chan-woo could hear his heart beat loudly in his ears while he nervously played with the long sleeves of his shirt. His eyes stayed downcast, trained on the floor in fear he'd see the usual looks from the leader and the eldest of the group. He knew he wouldn't be able to face either of them without breaking down once more.

A distraction came in the form of his phone vibrating in his pocket. Chan-woo pulled it out only to find it was merely a notification someone had posted a status on a social media platform. He didn't care for it, but he used this as an opportunity to distract himself from the painful silence. He scrolled through his timeline with blank eyes, not taking a single post in. Even when he saw flashes of the familiar faces of the ones he had just hurt, he didn't stop nor did he pay it any attention.

Both his body and his mind were worn out from the emotional day he had had. It wasn't long before his body pleaded with him to lie down on the couch. Chan-woo sighed softly as he grabbed the neatly folded blanket and carefully unravelled it. He swung his legs up before he threw the blanket over his feet. He settled with his head rested upon one of the couch pillows, too tired to go and get his usual pillow. He pulled the blanket right up until it rested under his chin, wanting to cover most of his body considering how self-conscious he currently was.

Chan-woo stuck his hands out in front of him with his phone in them. He continued to leisurely scroll through his social media feed with blank eyes. He'd rather preoccupy his mind with that rather than accidentally catch sight of a glare or a disappointed look from the other two in the room. And as time went by slowly, he found his mind was no longer thinking back on the situation that had occurred. But that was perhaps due to the emotionally numb state he could feel himself slipping into.

He didn't know how much time had passed since he had first laid down, but Chan-woo could feel his eyes begin to close on their own. He had enough energy to lock his phone and placed it in a safe spot unlike earlier that day, he'd hate to accidentally drop it again and risk the screen cracking. He shifted on the couch into a slightly more comfortable position. He sighed as his closed his eyes for good and allowed the serenity of the quiet room to lull him to sleep. His mind more grateful than his body to be able to get some more rest, the stressful events not helping in his recovery.

>_<     >_<     >_<

Chan-woo jumped awake at a loud noise not too far away from him. His mind was heavily disorientated as he tried to figure out where he was and what was happening. He pushed himself up with one arm into a seated position, the blanket fell and pooled around his waist. He turned his head only to find Namjoon and Hoseok at the front door with the food delivery guy who had just knocked. He breathed a sigh of relief after he saw he was not in any physical danger and collapsed back onto his side.

The enticing smell from the bags of takeaway flooded Chan-woo's nostrils as Namjoon and Hoseok placed them on the kitchen table. He took a deep breath in and his mouth instantly begun to water. As he turned over onto his back, his stomach rumbled in a painful reminder that he had yet to consume any food that day. He threw both of his arms over his face and groaned lowly. What he didn't realise as he continued to lay there in that position, was that the bottom of his shirt had ridden up and exposed some of his scarred and bruised skin on his stomach.

Sounds of the other boys preparing the dinner filled his ears. He wondered if he'd still be allowed to eat the extra food they had ordered, or if that offer had purely been said while Daniel had been present. Chan-woo didn't want to get his hopes up, but he honestly didn't know if would have the energy to make himself something. And on that note, he didn't even know if he would have the energy to sit at the table and eat if he was allowed to. His body and mind were absolutely drained.

"Namjoonie, go get everyone for dinner please," he heard Jin say from somewhere in the kitchen.

Footsteps approached the couch yet Chan-woo didn't dare move his arms to look at Namjoon as he walked passed. Even in his sleepy state of mind, he was still aware of the possibility the leader could throw a cold, disappointed, or angry look his way. He sighed heavily at the thought he was once again on the outside of the group with no one to lean on. Just as he was beginning to feel sorry for himself, he heard the footsteps stop close to him and his body tensed up in anticipation.

"Chan-woo," Namjoon said quietly.

"Yes Hyung?" he said as he shifted his arms up higher above his head to reveal his tired eyes. He looked into the soft brown eyes that weren't looking back at him. Instead the older's eyes were locked on the exposed skin that he still didn't realise was revealed. Now with a frown on his face, he spoke again with a quiet voice, "Hyung?"

"Come eat something. And you might want to fix your shirt before anyone else sees," Namjoon said quietly before he finally looked over into the tired brown eyes and gave a strained, sad smile.

"Fuck," Chan-woo whispered as his hands immediately pushed his t-shirt down and his cheeks flushed red from the utter embarrassment. "T-Thanks."

"Don't mention it," he said before he walked away.

Chan-woo couldn't believe that his shirt had lifted up and that Namjoon had seen his flawed skin. He gulped nervously as he sat up on the couch and held his head in his hands as a wave of dizziness passed over him. He took the brief pause in movement to calm his racing heartbeat. He had to wonder not if, but when, the questions would be thrown his way by the leader. As he grabbed his phone from the safe place he had left it, Chan-woo had already begun to feel nervous about that discussion he'd now have to sit through with Namjoon.

With all of his effort, he pushed himself into a standing position before he timidly walked over to the kitchen table. Hoseok and Jin had only just finished setting the table and had just sat down as they waited for the rest of the boys. Chan-woo didn't expect any words to be said to him as he sat on one of the end seats, closest to the lounge area, and furthest away from where the older two currently sat.

The silence that hung in the air between the trio weighed heavily on the youngest. The scenes from earlier replayed in his mind. He saw the hurt look on all of Hoseok, Taehyung, and Yoongi's faces. He felt the air shift again as Hoseok stared at him with no emotion, the light in his eyes gone. He heard Jin yell, over and over again, the taunting words of being called pathetic. He didn't blame the other two for not wanting to say anything to him as they sat at the table, yet it still hurt him.

As they patiently waited for Namjoon to round up the others, Chan-woo wondered to himself how long Hoseok, Yoongi and Taehyung were going to give him the cold shoulder for this time. Although technically Taehyung had never treated him like that before, he saw the same devastated look in the elder's eyes before he had silently walked away. He sighed as he remembered their eyes meeting while he sat on the couch and the other had stepped out from behind Hoseok.

Chan-woo sighed at the image stuck in his head before he reached up and fixed his hair. He knew that after the nap he had had, it would have been messy. As his fingers stroked through the soft, light brown hair, he couldn't help but think back on the moments over the last few days that his Hyung's had done that instead of him. His hands dropped to his lap as his shoulders deflated in defeat. He guessed that would be another thing he'd miss out on for his mistake; the physical affection that he so desperately craved.

"They shouldn't be too much longer," Namjoon's voice floated around the quiet room as he walked over to the table and sat beside Jin.

"They better hurry because I'm starving," said Hoseok with a chuckle.

"Here, pass me the wine and I'll start filling the cups up while we wait," Jin said as he stood up with his hand out.

Chan-woo watched as Hoseok passed one of the open bottles of wine to the eldest of the group. His eyes became unfocused the moment he saw the alcohol. If he thought he would struggle through this meal before, now he knew it would be even harder. Chan-woo knew his body had always had a strong reaction to alcohol thanks to his upbringing. And knowing he'd have to sit next to seven boys as they cheerful ate and drunk to celebrate their success, it was his version of a nightmare.

"Did you fall asleep?" Jin asked as he paused halfway through filling up the cup that was across from Chan-woo.

Shocked about the question being asked in the quiet room, Chan-woo looked up at the eldest. Although he frowned as he realised Jin's eyes were focused on something behind him. He turned his head slightly to find Yoongi standing near the couch with slightly dishevelled hair and half opened eyes. He adverted his gaze to his hands clasped together in his lap, embarrassed he thought that he was being spoken to.

"I only just fell asleep," mumbled Yoongi before he shuffled over and sat across from Namjoon and next to Hoseok. "But then I was rudely awoken."

"Rudely awoken?" scoffed Namjoon with a massive smile upon his face. "More like you sleep like a rock and need to be woken up like one."

"Still rude," Yoongi huffed as he rubbed his heavy eyes.

"It's not my fault you are hard to wake," chuckled Namjoon with a small roll of his eyes. "You've always been like that."

"Yeah so?" said Yoongi as he crossed his arms over his chest with a defiant twinkle in his eyes.

As much as painfully amused Chan-woo to listen to the bickering amongst the two, his attention was drawn away when Jin stopped next to him and grabbed his cup from him. The eldest filled the cup to the brim with wine before he silently placed it down and moved on to the next cup beside him. Chan-woo stared at the cup with wide panicked eyes. A nauseous feeling settled in stomach as well as a lump in his throat. He didn't want to be rude at the small gesture from Jin, but at the same time, he didn't want to be anywhere near the alcohol.

"Pass me another bottle," Jin said still beside Chan-woo.

Chan-woo jumped at the voice and snapped out of his trance. He looked over to watch Yoongi pass the another one of the opened bottles to Jin. After Yoongi had passed the item over, his eyes locked with Chan-woo's gaze. The two silently stared at one another, even when their line of view would be interrupted by Jin leaning in between them to continue fill up the cups. Emotionless eyes stared at emotional eyes; neither looking away from the other.

"Who's ready to celebrate?" joyfully sung Jimin as he walked out into the living room.

The eye contact between Chan-woo and Yoongi was broken as the elder of the two looked over to Jimin. The younger watched as a small smile appeared on Yoongi's face, a sight he had missed and would surely miss. He wished it was him that was causing the other to smile. He wished it was him that brought joy, not only to him, but to the entire group. He looked at his lap in shame as he thought about he had only brought hurt to the group.

"I am," laughed Hoseok as he answered the question. "Although I'm more hungry than anything right now. Taehyung and Jungkook better hurry up before I drag them out here."

"Say what now?" Jungkook asked with a chuckle as he walked out of the hallway to stand next to Jimin.

"Nothing," innocently said Hoseok, a few of the other members chuckled at his reply.

"Sure, Hyung, sure," sceptically said Jungkook as he and Jimin made their way over to the table.

Jungkook sat down next to Namjoon with Jimin on the other side of him. Chan-woo looked up at Jimin who had sat across from him, but quickly looked away as the other stared at him with an unhappy look. He nervously played with his hands as he accepted that his earlier actions had caused virtually every member to be upset with him. He gulped at the silence that engulfed the group, only the sounds of Jin clearing the empty wine bottle in the kitchen and the others fidgeting in their seats or with the items on the table were heard.

"Where is Taehyung," sighed Hoseok in barely contained frustration. "I just want to eat and sleep. Is that too much to ask for?"

"Calm down, Hobi Hyung," giggled Jimin with a massive smile upon his face.

"Yeah be patient," Jin scolded as he sat down in his seat once more.

"I'll give Taehyung thirty seconds before I go drag him out by the ear," said Hoseok.

"No need, Hyung. I'm right here," Taehyung laughed as he hurriedly made his way from the hallway over to the table. "Sorry."

"Thank goodness, I thought I was about to die from starvation," Hoseok said with relief as he smiled. The room bursted out in laughs and chuckles, all expect for Chan-woo whom stayed extremely quiet.

"Has Hyung been drinking already?" laughed Taehyung as he sat down next to Chan-woo without looking in the youngest's direction. "Or is he just in that hungry state?"

"Hungry state, that's why I was about to die of starvation," said Hoseok as he rolled his eyes, but flashed a smile towards Taehyung nonetheless.

As a loud round of laughs came from the most of the group, Chan-woo only shrunk in his seat further. As he looked around at each person sat near him, laughing carefree, his heart clenched from the agonising pain. All he wanted was to be accepted in the group and cared by them as much as he cared for them. He hated being alone, on the outside in the dynamics of the group, forced to watch on the sidelines as they shared happy moments. He wanted to be able to laugh, to joke, to banter. He didn't want to stay in the shadows, afraid to interact or afraid to speak.

"Alright let's have a toast so we can eat before the food gets cold," Jin said after they settled down, his voice drew Chan-woo out of his thoughts. "Joonie, do the honours will you?"

"A toast to us," Namjoon stood up with his cup in hand. Everyone, including Chan-woo, followed his lead and held their cups up. "All of our hard work has paid off. I am proud of each one of you for all of the long nights, tireless days, hard work, and countless tears. In these last five years, we've achieved so much, and this new house is well deserved. May we start our next chapter in our brand new house and continue to make more life long memories with each other. To more space, to more success, and to a fresh start."

After Namjoon had finished his speech, he held up his glass even higher with a warm smile on his face. The entire group raised their cups just like their leader had done before they each took a mouthful or two of their wine. Well, all expect for Chan-woo, who merely raised his glass and placed it back upon the table with a disgusted grimace. After Namjoon had sat down once more, the group begun to dig into the food that were in the containers spread out in front of them.

Chan-woo sat still as he watched all seven boys eagerly dish food onto their own plates. He gulped nervously, unsure whether he was still allowed to eat the food. And a part of him didn't want to take the food, that he hadn't paid for, in case he had the last piece and caused them to be even more upset with him. He'd much rather go lay down on the couch and leave them to celebrate with each other. He shouldn't be sat here with them, he didn't help them get to this point, he didn't deserve to celebrate their success with them.

"Thank you for the food Jin Hyung," Hoseok sighed in contentment after he had swallowed his mouthful. "It's delicious."

"Yeah, thank you Hyung," said Jungkook immediately, a bright smile upon his face.

"There's no need to thank me. I promised I would shout us all a celebratory meal when we were going to move on from these dorms to a bigger place," Jin said with a small laugh. "I'm just glad it was the celebratory meal and not the farewell meal Namjoon promised if things didn't work out."

"I can't believe you remember that promise from three years ago," Namjoon shook his head with shock laced throughout his voice. "We made that promise the day we moved here, right?"

"Right. And of course I remember that promise," laughed Jin. "It was well into our second year as a group and we had just finished moving from our old, cramped dorm to this one because we finally had an increase in our budget. You and I were sat on the couches after everyone had gone to bed, talking about the future. And we decided no matte which direction our career as a group went, that one of us would pay for one final meal here in this dorm."

"You doubted our success?" dramatically gasped Jimin, a cheeky smile settled upon his face as he then continued to eat.

"No, no, no. We never doubted it. But you'd be lying if you guys never had concerns," chuckled the eldest of the group as he took a sip of his wine.

The others around the table nodded in silent agreeance. All seven boys thought back on their earlier days as they hungrily ate their food. They had to agree with the eldest that they had concerns about where the future would lead them. Some of them had spent many late nights consumed with fears and self-conscious thoughts that they'd never be good enough. And some of them would never admit it out loud, but they had definitely had doubts that they'd never make it in this industry. It had been a long ride for all seven boys. However, they wouldn't have had it any other way.

"Shall we go around the table and share our favourite memory we have while we've lived in this place?" Namjoon asked after some silence.

"That's a great idea," brightly smiled Jimin as he sat up straighter in his chair. "Can I go first?"

"Sure, Jiminie," chuckled Namjoon as he sat back and took a sip of wine.

"Well my favourite memory in the dorm was that weekend we spent together at the end of last year. Remember? We had just finished our Wings Tour and to celebrate we decided not to leave the house at all that weekend. We had a movie marathon, ordered lots of our favourite take out, and had quite a few celebratory drinks to mark the end of a massive year and tour," said Jimin with a smile on his face as he spoke, the others smiled and chuckled at the memory.

"That was a good weekend," Jin said before he grabbed his drink and mimicked Namjoon's laid back posture. "Kookie, your next."

"Some of you may not like this, but it's my absolute favourite memory," Jungkook said with a mischievous grin already on his face. "But do you guys remember that day when the pipe of the bathroom sink burst and water flooded the hallway slightly?"

"How could we forget. Jin, Yoongi, Hoseok and I did all the work while you three brats did next to nothing," groaned Namjoon, his unoccupied hand came up to his face to pinch the bridge of his nose just from the annoyance of the memory.

"We spent hours clearing the water from the bathroom and hallway," said Hoseok with a shake of his head. "And then another few more hours just to dry it all up. My back was so sore after that day."

"Yeah... Well it's my favourite memory because while you Hyungs were busy cleaning it, I was allowed to have some fun. Remember?" the grin only intensified as Jungkook spoke.

"Ah yes. That's right. We let you have a small slip and slide until we started to clean the hallway," said Jin before his loud windshield laugh consumed the room.

"Yep! Spot on," chuckled Jungkook with a wide grin. "I've never had so much fun indoors. I'm glad you let me do that. My inner child was so happy to slide up and down the hallway."

"Mmm. Next time something like that happens, you three will be in charge of the clean up and us Hyungs can have the fun," sighed Hoseok but a smile took over his tired face soon after he spoke.

The table settled down with a few chuckles after the mixed memory. The group paused their reminiscing briefly to take a few bites of their food and to drink their wine. Chan-woo looked around the table, he looked at the content and happy expressions with a heavy heart. He was internally torn. On one hand, he was glad the boys weren't thinking about the day they had and were happy talking about the past. But on the other hand, he felt horrible that he had ruined the mood when they had got back that afternoon and he couldn't forgive himself.

"What about you, Taehyung?" Namjoon asked before he took another much needed sip of wine.

"Well to stay on the theme of messes," started to say Taehyung as his own grin took over his previously expressionless face. "My favourite memory was that time during our first year here when we had that massive pillow fight."

"Oh my sweet baby Jesus," groaned Jin as he placed his cup down and covered his face with both of his hands, his head shook side to side. "That mess was equally as horrible too."

"And once again, the responsible Hyungs were left to clean up after the group," sighed Namjoon, however a fond smile graced his face as the younger three laughed at the memory.

"I think I was finding random feathers all over the place for a solid month after that," Yoongi spoke up with a small smile upon his face. "Well personally, my favourite memory in this place is definitely tame, but I hold it close to my heart. I'm not sure if you guys will remember this. But a year or two ago I came down with a really bad cold for two weeks straight. And you all looked after me that entire time and I got to spend most of the time laying down in my bed or on the couch. It was an amazing two weeks expect for when the cold flared up badly."

"Oh yeah, I remember that," said Jungkook with a nod. "You were super needy and clingy that entire time."

"No I wasn't!" shouted Yoongi, his face reddening slightly from the embarrassment.

"Yes you were, Yoongi Hyung," laughed Jimin. "You asked virtually each one of us to lay with you every day. We probably got asked to do that individually at least three times a day. Right guys?"

"Right," nodded Taehyung with a massive smile.

"Whatever," huffed Yoongi in embarrassment. "That's my favourite memory."

"That's sweet that your favourite memory is us taking care of you though," cooed Hoseok from beside the older as he reached over and ruffled Yoongi's hair.

"It was more because I could rest all day for two weeks straight, but whatever," Yoongi said while he crossed his arms and stared at the table with an angry pout.

"Keep telling yourself that, you grumpy old man. We all know the real reason as to why it's your favourite," laughed Hoseok before he took a sip of his wine.

"And you, Hoseok? What's your favourite memory here?" asked Jin to divert the attention from the red faced Yoongi.

"Hmmm," he hummed while he placed his cup back down. "While I think the weekend long Wings Tour celebration Jimin mentioned is a close second. But the first place would have to go to our very first Christmas we spent in these dorms."

"Ahhhhhhh," Namjoon nodded with a fond smile, he agreed with the older that that was a great memory.

"It was the first time we all could afford to separately fly our families out here and pay for their accommodations for them to stay in the city," fondly smiled Hoseok. "We could see them as much as we wanted for that entire week leading up to Christmas and we alternated who's families could spend a few hours in the dorm with us. It was such a magical week. Being able to spend time with you all plus all of our families was amazing. It's something we haven't done since but I'll never forget the feeling."

"Awe that's so sweet Hyung," cooed Jimin.

"Yeah keep it up and I might start crying," Jungkook said and pretended to wipe away a fake tear.

"Ah hush, Kookie," Hoseok chuckled with a roll of his eyes.

The laughs that followed the small banter fell upon deaf ears. Chan-woo's eyes had unfocused slightly as he thought over the story that Hoseok had just shared. It hurt him to know he'd never be able to share something like that with them all. He would never, ever, want to introduce his parents to any of them. Although, for the members that hated him, he'd be sure they would get along fine with his parents. They would be able to talk badly about him and complain about his existence and all of the other hurtful stuff he knew they'd be able to come up with.

"Well my favourite memory is more of a recent one," suddenly said Jin which brought Chan-woo out of his thoughts. "It was my last birthday last year when you all spoiled me rotten with gifts, a homemade breakfast and lunch, a wonderful dinner at a BBQ restaurant with Bang Hyung included, and perfectly wrapped up with a relaxing night here with lots of alcohol."

"We couldn't think of a better gift than to spoil you with food. Because you do love your food," chuckled Jimin.

"I do, I do," nodded Jin with a smile. "But what surprised me the most, and what makes it my favourite memory here, was the fact you all made the breakfast and lunch by yourself without my help."

"Are you surprised mostly because Namjoon-ah didn't burn the kitchen down?" smirked Yoongi, his face no longer red.

"Watch it Hyung," jokingly glared Namjoon.

"How could Namjoon Hyung burn the kitchen down when he was in charge of simply pouring the drinks?" asked Jungkook with confusion.

"Well no, you're right. But it's a miracle he didn't smash the glasses with the amount of filling and re-filling he did all morning and afternoon," said Jin with a chuckle. "But that's not the point. The point is I am so grateful you all did that for me. Not only will it be my favourite memory here in this dorm, but it will be one of my favourite birthdays."

"Awe, that's so sweet," Hoseok smiled kindly at the eldest.

"And last, but definitely not least, Namjoon," smiled Jin as he gestured for the leader to speak.

"This one is a hard one," started to say Namjoon as he lent back in his chair. "I can't decide whether my favourite memory is our very first day we moved in here, or if it's today."

"Oh no, here we go," cheekily sighed Jungkook with a roll of his eyes.

"No! I mean it," lightly blushed Namjoon. "They both hold so much meaning to me. Because our very first day in this dorm signified we had made it passed our rookie phase and had a bigger budget to move out of our very first small dorm. Our first day here in this dorm was a happy time for us all because we saw it as a big step. But then there's today. We picked up the keys to a house, not a dorm, but a house. Today shows us just how hard we've worked over the years. You know?"

"You're so cheesy, Namjoon Hyung," said Jimin with disgust as he lent forward and grabbed his cup with a shiver that momentarily took over his body.

"I agree. That was cheesy. But at the same time, the sentiment behind the two different memories are very nice, Joonie," smiled Jin as he reached over and ran a hand through the leader's hair affectionately.

"All I'm trying to say is that today is one of my favourite memories because here we are, sharing what will be our last or second last meal, in this dorm as a group," sighed Namjoon tiredly.

"Very well said, Namjoon," smiled Hoseok warmly.

"Yeah, thank you for those wonderful words, Hyung," said Taehyung with a small nod and smile towards the leader.

While the boys quietened down to self-reflect on all of their good times, Chan-woo was bombarded with sudden anxious thoughts of his own. He had quietly watched as they interacted and listened to the way they spoke to each other, and it had only added to his feelings of being the outsider. His heart broke the longer he stayed at the table without uttering a word or being spoken to. His mind slowly dragged him down a dark spiral of depressive thoughts. The already self-conscious boy was plagued with his insecurities screaming at him to just leave the table and leave the other boys to their celebrations.

Chan-woo clasped his hands together in his lap as he thought back on all of the fond memories the members had each shared. And as he quietly sat at the end of the table, he wondered if he'd ever reach a place with them to be able to share such memories. Would he ever be able to reminisce on happy memories? Would he ever be accepted into the group by every single one of them? It only disheartened him more the longer his mind spiralled down the path of forever being the outcasted burden of the group.

The youngest at the table had been so caught up in his mind that it took him a few seconds to realise what was happening before him. Taehyung had paused in his eating and had begun to dish different food options onto the empty plate in front of Chan-woo. He looked over to the other with a frown on his face, partly confused why the older was taking care of him after all of the damage he'd done. His eyes searched the emotionless face in hopes he could get a glimpse into the reason why.

"Eat up," Taehyung spoke quietly, his eyes never made contact with Chan-woo's confused, sad ones.

"Thanks," he whispered, barely audible, before he picked up his chopsticks and simply stared at the plate before him.

Despite his stomach painfully protesting that food still hadn't reached his mouth yet, Chan-woo couldn't force himself to eat. The strong smell of alcohol wafted up his nostrils as Taehyung had picked his cup up and lent back in his seat beside him, slowly sipping on the liquid. He felt sick from being in closer proximity than he had all night to the offending drink. His eyes closed as he focused on purely breathing through the sudden nausea. All he could think about was how he hoped Taehyung would place the drink down soon so there would be distance between his nostrils and the wine once more.

"Are you okay?" a small voice asked through the quiet of the room.

Chan-woo opened his eyes slowly to find Jungkook with an intense look upon his face as he awaited an answer. The room seemed to pause in all movement as all eyes turned towards him. He gulped nervously as he looked around the table, meeting each set of eyes only to find majority of them seemed empty compared to the joy he had seen in them only moments before. He looked down at his lap in shame and silently shook his head without a word.

"What's wrong?" asked Namjoon with some concern in his voice.

The youngest's heart clenched as he heard the tone. He wanted to believe it was real and that the other was concerned for him. But Chan-woo knew it would merely be out of pity. Pity for his health condition. Pity for his scars and bruises. Pity for being on the outside of everyone. Pity for him. And he didn't want any more of it. He just wanted to hide from Namjoon, he wanted to hide from the empty stares, he wanted to hide from the world.

"Are you feeling dizzy? Do you need to lie down?" Namjoon asked once more when the younger didn't answer.

"N-No," he shook his head slightly as he looked up at the leader. "I'm fine. D-Don't worry about me."

"You don't look fine though," pointed out Jimin, his eyes scanned the younger's face with no emotion.

"I'm-" Chan-woo went to say before he was cut off.

"If you aren't dizzy, just have a drink and relax. You seem too tense, I'm sure that will help with whatever is troubling you," said Jin as he continued to eat, his eyes still stayed focused on Chan-woo however.

"No, that's what is probably making him sick," Hoseok sighed.

"Is Hoseok right, Chan-woo?" asked Jin, a frown settled upon his face.

Eyes darted around in panic, not sure what to do in this situation. All eyes were on him. All ears were listening to him. He wasn't on good terms with essentially all of them, and he didn't particularly feel like revealing his past in that moment. He knew his response would only end in more questions. And he didn't want this to ruin the mood or to ruin the celebrations. But before he could even respond, his attention was caught by movement beside him from Taehyung.

"Y-Yeah," he nodded, his eyes locked on the cup as Taehyung moved.

"Why?" asked Jungkook, always inquisitive lately about the secret that was Chan-woo.

Silence filled the room as Chan-woo blankly stared at the cup of wine Taehyung had only just placed back down. The smell that had clouded all of his sense and made him feel nauseous slowly faded away. He sighed, grateful there was distance once more between him and the sickening scent. It was then, after the relief had set in, that he realised every single person in the room was still waiting for his response to Jungkook's question. He took a second to ponder over how much he was willing to share.

"It's too long of a story. The short version is that the smell of alcohol makes me feel nauseous," he said quietly as a small blush rose upon his cheeks.

"Is that why you didn't want to drink at the restaurant even when Bang Hyung offered? Because the smell makes you sick?" asked Jimin.

"Yeah," he whispered with a nod of his head.

"Have you ever had a taste of alcohol before?" Jungkook asked with a tilt of his head.

"No," he shook his head in response.

"Would you ever?" again asked Jungkook, his head still tilted.

"Never say never. But I would not try it for many, many, many years to come," he said with a disgusted look throw towards the untouched cup that sat in front of him.

"That's fair enough. Not everyone likes alcohol anyway," Jungkook said with a shrug as he adjusted in his chair. "There must be more of a reason in that long version of your story as to why though."

"Y-Yes. But it's not something I want to s-share. Not yet anyway," he looked down at his lap while he felt his face burn in embarrassment.

"Well, you only just opened up about your health issue this morning," spoke Namjoon after he cleared his throat. "We don't expect you to spill all of your secrets in one day. You can tell whoever you feel comfortable with and whenever you are ready. Because I know you probably don't want to share your past to the few of us who still haven't completely warmed up to you."

Chan-woo nodded his head as he listened to the wise leader of the group. He felt grateful none of them seemed to be pressing him to get an answer. If they had, he might have cracked under the pressure and ending up a sobbing mess. He was already so emotionally unstable. He didn't need anyone trying to pry into his past, especially when it was by someone who had treated him so coldly the entire time.

As he finally forced himself to take the first bite of the food on his plate, Chan-woo couldn't help but analyse the conversation he had just had. While Namjoon seemed the most concerned out of the group, he felt the inquisitiveness from Jungkook could potentially lead to the two to have a mutual acquaintance in the near future. In which the slightly older boy didn't hate him but at the same time they weren't on friendly terms. And if that were to happen, Chan-woo would welcome it with open arms. He'd take anything other than a cold exchange with any of the boys at this point in time, not to sound desperate, but that's how he felt.

One person Chan-woo still didn't know where he stood with was Jimin. Both that morning and moments ago, the other seemed to not be interested in him one bit. He had to wonder if Jimin secretly still hated him and tried to not be rude to his face in front of the other members. That could explain why Jimin had come across as emotionless whenever he did say something towards him. He didn't like when he couldn't read people, it unnerved him. He'd rather someone openly dislike or hate him, as it lowered any hopes he could possibly develop.

It also appeared that Jin had calmed down since he had lost his patience at him earlier in the afternoon. While the eldest had only directed a few comments towards Chan-woo during the meal, he didn't seem to be holding the prior incident against him from what he could tell. But he fully expected for Jin to continue with the cold treatment after the dinner finished. He predicted the way the older had interacted with him a few minutes ago was purely because of the good mood the entire table was in.

Although the same couldn't be said for Taehyung, Yoongi and Hoseok. Their attitude towards him drastically differed from the happy mood they were in when interacting with everyone else. Taehyung wouldn't look him in the eyes, Yoongi hadn't spoke a word to or about him, and Hoseok almost seemed annoyed that he had to jump in about the alcohol when Chan-woo first freaked out. It hurt to watch each of them smile, laugh, talk freely and then switch the second they were reminded of his presence.

The table remained silent as the group finished their plates of food. Occasionally the members of the group would take a sip from their cups, their eyes flicked towards the extremely quiet Chan-woo with concern. They could tell the younger had a lot on his mind by glazed over expression on his face and the way he would absentmindedly chew on the food for a bit too long. Majority of the boys would be lying to themselves if they said they weren't worried. Never before had they seen such a strong reaction to alcohol, the short reason hadn't made any sense to those that were in the dark about the actual reason why. 

"Well I'm going to turn in for the night," Hoseok sighed with a content smile upon his face as he pushed his chair back and stood up.

Hoseok leant down and hugged Yoongi which enticed an annoyed groan from the older. As he straightened up, he ruffled the slightly messy hair Yoongi hadn't quite fixed from earlier, before he then moved on next to Taehyung. With a warm smile, he threw both of his arms around Taehyung and squeezed him tightly. The younger of the two returned the gesture by placing his hands on the arms that were around him and squeezed them as an acknowledgement.

"Have a good sleep, Hyung," Taehyung said in a quiet, yet deep, voice.

"You too Tae," said Hoseok as he finally released the younger and stood up.

Chan-woo's body tensed up in anticipation as he watched the movement from the corner of his eyes. He wasn't sure if the older would consider hugging him or not, especially after the events of the day. And as he watched Hoseok walk away from him to head towards Jin at the other end, he couldn't help the drop of his heart. The tension never left him as he thought about how this could potentially play out. Either Hoseok would hug him very last or not at all. He gulped nervously as he continued to watch everything from the corner of his eyes.

"Thank you again for the dinner Jin Hyung. I had a good night," Hoseok said after he pulled back from the eldest of the group.

"No worries," warmly smiled Jin as he looked back at Hoseok. "Get some good rest."

"Thanks Hyung, you too," he said before he gave Namjoon a hug. "Thanks Joonie."

"It's okay. Sleep well, I know you're really tired," the leader said with a soft chuckle as he patted one of the arms around him.

"That's an understatement. But thank you," Hoseok laughed as he stood up yet again and quickly engulfed Jungkook in a big hug. "Kookie-ah, have a good night. Thank you for everything our little Golden Maknae."

"Oh hush, Hyung," Jungkook whined as the others at the table chuckled in regards to the nickname. "Go to sleep already. I can tell you're overtired and the wine isn't helping anything."

"I'm fine," the older said as he stood up and roughly ruffled Jungkook's hair. "I only had one glass."

"Mmm, sure thing. Keep telling yourself that Hyung," cheekily grinned Jungkook as he tilted his head back to look up at Hoseok, everyone knew that Hoseok was terrible at tolerating his alcohol.

"Brat," whispered Hoseok with a wide smile on his face.

"Good night Seokie Hyung," smiled Jimin as he stood up with his arms open, interrupting the light banter between the other two.

"Night Jiminie," Hoseok loudly said as he embraced the younger tightly and rocked them side to side happily.

"Calm down," laughed Jimin while he desperately tried to escape the hold. "Hyung! Let go of me."

"Not sorry," also laughed Hoseok as he eventually let go and walked to stand at the end of the table. He looked around to each person before him - all except for Chan-woo which didn't go unnoticed by him - a sparkle evident in his eyes as he contently sighed. "Once again, I just wanted to say thank you all for an amazing five years. I'm glad to be here with you all. I'm ready to start our moving out process tomorrow. In saying that, I'll go get some good rest. Good night!"

A chorus of amused good night's rung around the room. Hoseok smiled warmly as he turned his back and only managed to take two steps towards the hallway before he was stopped by a small hand grasping onto his wrist. His eyes looked down at the hand before they travelled up to Chan-woo's sad eyes. The smile that had graced Hoseok's face slowly faded away the longer the pair silently stared at one another.

The amount of pain that swelled within Chan-woo, as he observed the shift in aura, crushed him. He gulped heavily from the sudden thickness that clogged his throat. His hand instinctively released its grip on Hoseok's wrist, despite how much the younger wanted to cling onto the other. It pained him to see the empty look in the usually soft and kind eyes. And although the room was filled with noise as the other members continued to talk and eat, the silence between himself and Hoseok felt almost unbearable.

"Night, Hyung," whispered Chan-woo, he couldn't help the sadness that leaked into his voice.

Chan-woo didn't expect a response from Hoseok as he hung his head in shame. Why would he? Hoseok had been really hurt earlier that day. The older had ignored him ever since they had returned home. Not a single word was spoken to him at the dinner. Chan-woo understood why he hadn't received a hug like everyone else. His previous selfish actions caused a drift between them, but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt him to be ignored again. He just wanted things to go back to normal between them.

"Night," Hoseok whispered back before he immediately left the room.

His eyes snapped up in shock as he watched Hoseok's retreating back. Chan-woo's heart skipped a beat at what the older had said. It was spoken so lowly under Hoseok's breath that he almost didn't hear it. Chan-woo gulped back the flare of emotion he felt within him. The regret he had for making the decision to invite Daniel over without permission intensified from the look he had seen in Hoseok's eyes. If only he could go back in time and just ask. Perhaps then Yoongi, Taehyung and Hoseok wouldn't be upset with him. Perhaps the celebration tonight would have gone completely different.

A small sigh left Chan-woo's lips as he turned his attention back to the plate in front of him. He urged himself to pick up the chopsticks and forced some food into his mouth. And even though he had no appetite, he'd rather not let the food Taehyung had served him go to waste. As he quietly chewed on the food, he couldn't help but feel deflated once more. It seemed no matter how hard he tried to keep his thoughts away from the events of the day, his mind wouldn't allow it.

The laughs and chatter around the table fell upon deaf ears as Chan-woo continued to be caught up in his thoughts. Constant anxiety and self-criticism plagued his mind. How he wished he had done things differently. Only just that morning, he felt as if he was on the right road to creating stronger bonds with some of the members he'd been struggling to connect with. He'd taken a chance to open himself up and be vulnerable, yet, he'd sabotaged himself with his actions later in the day. The fruitless attempt to make connections weighed heavily on him.

And now it felt like he'd taken not one, not two, but several steps backwards. He was once again in the bad books with Hoseok and Yoongi. Taehyung seemed to still be looking out for him but he too seemed distant. No process had been made with Jin, Jimin and Jungkook even after he had revealed some of his medical history that morning. And he felt as if Namjoon merely felt inclined to get to know and look out for him as the leader. Especially after what he had learnt that morning as well as what he had seen just before dinner.

Chan-woo had been so pre-occupied in his mind that he completely missed what had occurred around him. It was only as he sensed someone walk behind him that he stirred from his gloomy thoughts. He realised that yet another person was on their way to bed. He turned his head and watched disappointedly as Yoongi continued to walk towards the hallway without a word or glance in his direction.

Although it truly crushed him that he had missed the opportunity to bid Yoongi a good night, Chan-woo doubted the older would have responded anyway. He didn't know what would have disheartened him more; being completely ignored or seeing that blank look in Yoongi's eyes. As he turned his dejected eyes back to his plate, his stomach painfully protested at the sight before him. All of the negatives emotions within him suddenly caused him to feel nauseous. The food in front of him became unappetising, not believing he deserved to eat the same food with the others after what he had done.

Without a word, Chan-woo pushed his chair back and stood up. Even though he could sense a few stares in his direction, he didn't bother to look their way. Instead he picked up his plate and chopsticks, pushed in his chair, and then silently walked into the kitchen. He looked down at the half-eaten plate with a tiny bit of proudness. Considering he didn't think he'd be able to eat anything at all, he was pleased with the effort he'd made. He scraped the remainder into the rubbish bin before he rinsed both the plate and metal chopsticks in the sink and stacked them on the dish rack.

Chan-woo turned around and leant his lower back against the bench. He pulled out his phone from his pocket to see that the evening had gone by rather quickly, despite the awkwardness he'd felt throughout the entire meal. It was going on to almost be 9pm. A quiet exhale left his lips as he simultaneously dragged his unoccupied hand down his face. Even though he had spent most of the day resting, his body still craved to lay down and possibly sleep some more. Although he had to wonder how long it would be until his mind would allow such peace to overtake him.

The tired boy pushed himself off of the bench and shuffled his way over to his duffle bag with phone still in hand. As he squatted down, he placed his mobile on the ground for a brief moment to free his hands to be able to gather everything he required. He grabbed his toiletries bag, a fresh pair of clothes to wear to bed, and his pillow. Chan-woo closed up his duffle bag and made sure his little corner was tidy before he stood up with everything in his arms. He didn't bother to look in the others direction as he quickly placed his pillow on the couch and then proceeded straight to the bathroom.

With the door securely locked, Chan-woo begun his nightly routine. In the privacy of the silent room, he allowed himself to drop the mask he had around all of the boys. He watched his reflection as his eyes became even sadder, his shoulders dropped further in defeat, and the true tiredness he felt be displayed in his features. And for a moment, even he pitied himself. Chan-woo sighed as he set about brushing his teeth.

As his body worked in autopilot mode, his thoughts turned to the future. Specifically, the moving day scheduled for the next day. While the members all had furniture, he had nothing. All he had were his two bags and the small collection of new items he'd purchased. He had been so caught up in the short training period that he'd neglected to start the search for furniture he would eventually need. Chan-woo knew that the boy's focus with the move the next day would be clothing, small furniture, and miscellaneous items. So perhaps while they all were busy with  everything, he'd be able to go to the shops and try his best to urgently find at least a bed.

He moved onto changing his clothes. He had spent all day in the current clothes and he'd rather change out of them even though he didn't have the energy to shower. And as Chan-woo begun to peel off his long sleeved shirt, his thoughts turned from the move day to his pathetic body. His eyes roamed his reflection with a mixture of disgust and misery. The bruise on his rib hadn't changed since he last checked on it four days ago, much to his dismay. But the bruises on his neck had almost faded completely. One would have to stop and stare for a minute to be able to see anything out of the ordinary, unless, they already knew what to look for of course.

Chan-woo dragged his eyes off of his blemished skin as he finished changing into his light blue oversized hoodie and grey track pants. And while he cleaned up after himself, ready to leave, he couldn't help but be reminded of earlier events. He remembered the look in Namjoon's eyes as the older could only stare at his exposed stomach. He remembered the panic that flared through his entire body the moment he realised. He gulped heavily as he held everything in his arms once more, anxious about what would happen when Namjoon inevitably would approach him to 'talk'.

The living room still had a reasonable amount of noise as the reaming five continued to talk, drink, and pick away at the food. Chan-woo chose his best to ignore them all as he packed away his items. As he neatly stacked his dirty clothes underneath the duffle bag, he couldn't help but feel relieved it would only be two more sleeps, one more full day, until he would be moving into his own space where he'd have a place for all of his items. It didn't truly register with him how much he hated living out of a large duffle bag until this moment. He'd be able to hang his clothes in his small wardrobe and be able to choose the day's outfit with much more ease now that he wouldn't have to dig through a bag.

Like always, Chan-woo placed his phone on charge for overnight. Before he stood up, he turned on an alarm so he'd have plenty of time to get ready and spend the day at the shops. He paused as he stood up to stretch his arms over his head. Although he was conscious about his oversized hoodie, making sure it didn't ride up to reveal any of his skin. He'd prefer not to have another incident, especially considering whom was still in the room.

The tired young man walked over to the couch and allowed his body to flop down into the soft cushions below. He stayed seated upright, leaning his head against the back of the couch, and closed his eyes. Chan-woo sat still as he focused on his breathing and the other sounds that floated to him. The longer he stayed in position, the more his body begged to lay down. His eye brows burrowed in confusion. Despite resting fairly much all day, he could sense his body was still absolutely exhausted. Perhaps it had something to do with the emotional rollercoaster he'd experienced in the last twelve hours.

"Good night Chan-woo," a voice said behind him suddenly which caused the younger to jump in fright.

"N-Night," stuttered Chan-woo as he opened his eyes and looked behind him.

With a slightly accelerated heartbeat, he watched as Namjoon smiled down at him with pity. The leader reached forward and softly patted his shoulder in what was meant to be a comforting gesture. Both paused as the gentle touch only caused Chan-woo too flinch. A frown settled on the older's face while Chan-woo nervously shuffled on the couch with his head hung in shame. He played with his hands in his lap as the silence between them continued on much to his displeasure.

"Get some rest," Namjoon said quietly with a soft tone.

"You too," he replied just loud enough to be heard, he refused to look up again in fear of what he'd see.

Chan-woo didn't move a muscle as he watched Namjoon walk away out of the corner of his eyes. His entire body continued to remain tense for a few minutes, the interaction replayed in his mind. He hated how easily he flinched, even though he had foreseen the approaching touch. Finally, he shook off the tension in his body as he grabbed the blanket and unravelled it. He adjusted the pillow and, for the third time that day, laid down.

Out of habit, Chan-woo pulled the blanket all the way up to his chin, his neck hidden from view. It took a few minutes for his tired body to settle into a comfortable position. The thought of the semi-full table of people looking his way made him uncomfortable and harder for him to settle down. But eventually the lingering side effects from the massive episode two days ago caused his eyes to close and his breaths to even out.

Surprisingly it didn't take the youngest male in the room to completely relax and start to lose the battle of fighting off the oncoming sleep. Regardless of the noise in the room and the occasional anxious thought, sleep drew young Chan-woo into a deep relaxation. Thoughts on the past and the future slowly came few in between, as did the minutes, as they too slowed down. Soon enough the tired male slipped into sleep, glad to be away from the events of the day, glad to be away from his draining thoughts.

The remanding four at the table would periodically let their eye sight drift over to the peaceful sleeping form on the couch. No matter how hard they tried to not to feel anything for the younger, they simply couldn't avoid it. Worry, concern, wonder, and curiosity would flood their minds the second they would look at him. Even though the day had been up and down, mostly down, it didn't stop all four secretly thinking about the younger and being concerned over certain actions and responses they had witnessed.

Quietly, the four begun to clean up the dinner, conscious about not being loud so Chan-woo could continue to sleep. Neither of them would mention it, but they had taken in the exhausted look as he had returned from the bathroom. It was evident to them, as well as Namjoon, that even in spite of resting at home all day that Chan-woo had still been lethargic from the flare up. At least Jimin, Jungkook, and Jin now knew there was a valid reason behind it and not just him faking things for attention or sympathy.

With the kitchen table tidy and all left overs in the fridge, the four each had one last glass of wine to finish off the bottle before they said their goodnight's. Taehyung stayed behind to straighten a few items on the table and wash the dirty plates to dry over night. He worked as quietly as he could, mind occupied with thoughts of his own, digesting the events from the day. The occasional sigh would leave his lips as he got closer to being done. Tiredness had grown stronger in his body as he dried his hands on the tea towel near the sink and walked over to the light switches.

Darkness engulfed the silent room. Taehyung sighed softly as carefully navigated over to the couch and stood above Chan-woo. The small amount of moonlight that streamed in through the window allowed him to see the soft features of the other. Another sigh left him, disappointed he'd allowed himself to get jealous and hurt Chan-woo in the process. The younger didn't deserve to be on the receiving end of his own problems. Gently, he reached down and ran his hand through the soft hair.

"Have a good sleep," Taehyung whispered before he turned away and walked to his room.