(A/N: Hiccstrid having a casual conversation during sex and being total dorks.)

"God, I'm never going away for three weeks ever again," He said, frustrated but a smile on his lips as Astrid casually undressed before him.

"You better freaking not. I've been sleeping alone and been sexually frustrated for three weeks. Stop complaining," Astrid fires back, giving him a look as she threw her pants onto the pile of clothes on the desk chair that had suddenly become the chair.

Hiccup walked up to her, a limp in his step and he shook his head. "Woman, I didn't want to jerk off because it felt wrong and I wasn't even in the mood without you being there," He confirmed, grabbing her waist and guiding her down onto the bed behind her.

His skin felt like fire against her own and his palm tingled, missing the feeling of her soft skin against his.

"Mmhmm," Astrid hummed. "You won't last more than a second then," She mocked and poked him in the chest, her nail leaving a crescent moon shape on his skin.

"Oh, hush it, you. I'll make it up with your favorite dinner if I don't," He said and leaned down, kissing her collarbone.

Astrid bit her bottom lip, placing her hands on his shoulders. "Oh? Mediterranean Pasta with chicken and tomatoes?" Astrid asked, hopefulness in her voice.

Hiccup lifted himself up from her collarbone and raised his hand, licking one of his fingers. Reaching down between them, he slid his wetted finger between her lips and found that licking his finger had been pointless.

"Mmhmm, just that," He said, agreeing to her.

Astrid pressed her head into the pillows, finally being able to feel his hand work it's magic on her again. "Oh," She whined out, both from pleasure and from the food.

Her stomach rumbled and she chuckled. "Better start cooking now instead. You're basically already finish- eeeed, shit!" She said but squeaked when his finger dipped into her and curled upwards, finding that heavenly spot that made her writhe every time.

"We'll see. We have to get there first," Hiccup pointed out as he pressed a kiss onto the nipple on her left breast before he slowly made his way down.

His finger slowly moving in and out of her, he looked at her face as he pressed a sloppy kiss to the apex of her legs.

He watched her throw her head back from looking at him and her lips parted. "Fuck, Hiccup," Astrid moaned out.

"We'll get to that soon too," He said with a smile before wrapping his lips around the bundle of nerves and flicking it with his tongue.

"Screw you and your wit," Astrid fought out, reaching down and grabbing a fistful of his hair, tugging at it. "You love my wit and sarcasm," Hiccup replied with a smile, his voice vibrating against her which sent shivers down her back.

Astrid gripped the pillow behind her, feeling the hear build up with every movement he did. She'd come undone after three weeks of waiting for him.

"That, I do- god!"

Her sentence was interrupted by her orgasm shaking her legs and her eyes rolled back, bliss overtaking her.

Hiccup raised his head from between her legs, pulling his fingers out and licking them before wiping his mouth.

"You good?" He mocked, a smirk on his face.

Astrid raised her head, feeling as if her eyes were going two different directions before focusing on him. "Never been better," She said and sat up, patting the place beside her.

Hiccup crawled up beside her and plopped down onto her place once she moved.

His semi-hard cock rested against his stomach once he settled after adjusting the pillow behind him.

Astrid sat down on his lap and leaned forward to kiss him before stopping. "Am I hurting you?" She asked and wiggled slightly. "Nope, you're fine," He said and placed his hands on her slim waist, calloused hands trailing up and down soft skin.

Closing the gap between them, she pressed her lips against his for a small peck before drawing back.

Hiccup leaned up and captured her lower lip, drawing her back down before kissing her passionately, tongues battling between their mouths.

Shifting, she slowly lifted her leg from over his to between his two legs, slowly trailing down.

Pressing a small kiss to the faint scar over his hipbone from his appendectomy, she trailed down further and carefully wrapped her hand around him.

Lifting his semi-hard cock, his head flopped about and she licked her lip before kissing it.

Looking up at him a second later, she shrugged. "Turn on some music. Our go-to playlist."

Hiccup grabbed his phone from the nightstand, connecting it to the Bluetooth speaker on the desk and turning on their "sex playlist" because it made things more fun.

Just as he was about to put his phone away to enjoy the moment, Astrid let him go. "Okay, that song is a no-go. Why is it even in there? Change," She said and watched him.

"Yeah. I don't even know how Uptown Girl got in here," Hiccup said as he shrugged and deleted the song from the playlist.

"Ah, so much better," Astrid hummed as she took him into her mouth again, bobbing and running her tongue over his head.

The movement caught him off guard and the pleasure made his arms weak. He was going to put his phone back onto the nightstand but dropped it instead, landing on the carpet below the bed with a thud.

"Fuck," He groaned, both at the pleasure and the fact that he dropped his phone.

"Yeah, we'll get to that soon," Astrid shot back, her voice slightly muffled while she ran her tongue along his length.

"Oh, you think you're so sassy- ow! Hey!" Hiccup muttered before yelping.

She fucking bit him.

"Oh, you vixen. You're gonna get it," He said, gritting his teeth and rubbing his sore, saliva covered cock.

Astrid chuckled. "You love me," She said and watched him. "That, I do- oooo!" He said and jerked when she swallowed him, - all of him.

The muscles in the back of her throat clutched his head and his eyes rolled back as he threw an arm over his face.

She would be the end of him, - literally.

"Ah, gods above, you're perfect," Hiccup said, his voice strained and his face slightly red.

"Mmm."

He twitched in her mouth as she bobbed her head up and down and she pumped the base of his back, egging him on for a release.

He did just that.

Astrid pulled back once he was finished, satisfied that he was happy and still hard? Huh. Weird.

Maybe the three-week deprivation had given him a boost.

She for sure didn't waste it and climbed up his body, settling down on her previous spot, - in his lap in front of his erection so she wasn't hurting him.

"You good?" She asked, doing the same thing as he had before. "Fucking amazing," He huffed out and rested his hands on her thighs, squeezing them.

Scooting forward, Astrid settled down over his cock and grabbed it, guiding it into herself. "Holy mother of god-" Hiccup said, his voice failing as he felt her squeeze him, wet and hot.

Wiggling, she tested him, enjoy the pleasured-pain the stretch brought. "Keep that up and I really gave to start cooking soon," Hiccup pointed out, one eye open.

Astrid laughed. "Well, I am hungry," She pointed out as she leaned down. Kissing him, she raised her hips and felt his fingers dig into her thigh and butt cheek.

"Yeah," Hiccup breathed out. "But I'm not in the mood for cooking now," He pointed out between kisses.

Astrid pouted, her rhythm picking up.

"What I really want is for my wife to stop teasing me and let us both have good freaking sex," He said, smirk on his face.

Astrid rolled her eyes. "Fine. But only if you promise to make me that pasta," She said, looking at him.

Hiccup thrusted upwards, meeting her and she moaned out loud. "I would've made you that pasta anyway."

"Goddamnit, Hiccup," She cursed and hit his chest. "Stop teasing me and fuck me properly," Astrid said, her sexual frustration coming through.

"Now, that's more like the Astrid I know," He said and flipped them around into missionary.

"Shush," She said through gritted teeth, tension and heat building up.

Hiccup grabbed her waist, slipping a few times before getting a good hold. He gripped the headboard with his other hand and picked up the speed, increasing the force in his thrusts as well.

Her moans became louder until she was cursing enough that would make Vikings blush and his name echoed between their bedroom walls.

Good thing they lived in a house away from the city. They'd probably get evicted if they lived in an apartment.

It wasn't like he was silent either. Having been together with Astrid since the age of seventeen and marrying her at the age of twenty, she'd definitely mixed up his life and made it less boring.

"Holy shit, Hiccup. God...amazing," Astrid breathed out, lips trailing wet kissed along his shoulders and leaving a bruise of two.

She bit the muscle between his shoulder and neck when her orgasm ripped through her, leaving her breathless and forgetting how to breathe.

Hiccup groaned and with jerky movements, somehow managed to bury himself deep inside of her as he came.

Slowly coming down from their high, Astrid wiggled to tease him, knowing he was very sensitive after an orgasm.

"Gah! Astrid, don't do that," He complained, sounding like a child.

"Do what?" She teases and wiggled again. "This?" She asked. "Or do you want me to squeeze you?"

"God, just not that-" His sentence was interrupted by a loud gasp as she squeezed him, getting jerky movements from him again.

Being quite sensitive herself, she hummed as she did that again and again.

"You're so evil," Hiccup complained, hands beside her head for support.

"Mmhmm," Astrid hummed. "You're the evil one for leaving me here for three weeks."

Hiccup rolled his eyes. "The council is evil then. Next time, I might as well take you with me and fuck you on the table in front of everybody," He said, voice serious.

"Do that then. I'm not wait three weeks or god knows how long time until you can get home to screw me senseless again," Astrid said and leaned up, kissing him.

Hiccup kissed her back but pouted when she pulled away.

"Now, make me that Mediterranean Pasta. I'm starving."