Day 4: Reincarnation

(i)

It’s cold. She thinks it shouldn’t be that cold. It has never been that cold. Though she can’t remember how the weather was before this, a part of her tells her the current temperature is wrong. It’s probably due to the blood loss. Ah, yes, there is blood loss, isn’t there? Her body is aching. It can only be due to a grave injury. It’d be a shame to die here, wouldn’t it? She doesn’t know where there is but it doesn’t feel comfortable. Yes, yes, she wouldn’t want to die here. There is something she has to do. There’s a weight in the back of her head and a voice instructing her to do something but no matter how hard she tries, she can’t understand what it’s saying.

What a shame, she thinks again, I really had somewhere to be.

.

(1)

“Morning, sugarplums.” Himeko greets her once she comes inside the salon. Even though she’s thirty minutes early, Himeko doesn’t question it. After all, VALKYRIES is more than a part-time job for Kiana; it’s a second home. That’s why even if Himeko insists on paying her for the extra hours, Kiana refuses to let her. “Hua is sick. Do you think you can handle her appointments or should I call Bronya?”

“As long as it’s not bangs.”

“Of course, I would never trust you with bangs after last time.”

“Himeko,” Kiana whined. The older woman only laughed in response. Although Kiana had been working there for a little more than two years, she still didn’t consider herself skilled with the scissors. Now hair dye she could handle even better than Fu Hua.

The door opens causing Kiana to turn and come face to face with a beautiful girl. Well, mostly beautiful. While she looked like the kind of person who belonged in modelling magazines, there was a big problem in her head. Her long blonde hair was a riot of colours and not in a good way–with patches of brown, black and purple. It was such a horrible sight, Kiana couldn’t hold back her gasp.

“Yes,” the girl said with a big sigh, “it’s pretty awful, isn’t it?”

“It’s,” Ai-chan’s–that one sketchy person that had presented a seminar at her high school–first rule when dealing with customers is to always tell them the truth but in a way they won’t sue you. “an interesting choice.”

The girl chuckles and smiles. It’s a beautiful smile that makes Kiana’s heart race. “I’m Mei. I have an appointment with miss Fu Hua.”

“Unfortunately, Hua is sick but Kiana, here,” miss Himeko says as she puts a hand on Kiana’s shoulder, “will be happy to help you.”

“You think you can turn it full blonde?”

Kiana smiles warmly. It will be a pain to bleach without ruining Mei’s hair completely but she’s sure she’ll manage. “Have a seat. Your hero is here.”

.

(2)

Kiana is in that very tender age when a girl has only one thing on her mind; the hope that her teacher will be involved in a terrible accident and the exams will be cancelled. This is why she had rushed to sit on the seat by the window and was now looking outside the window with all the focus she could master. Mr Welt was nice, perhaps the nicest of the school’s teachers, but he was also the teacher of one of Kiana’s worst subjects; physics. And so, while she did not wish for his death, if he were to fall from the stairs or something, she wouldn’t be very sad about it.

“Excuse me,” –Kiana turned around to see the source of the voice– “is this seat taken?”

Now, the only thing that’s important for one to know about Kiana is that she’s very weak to pretty girls. They make her brain stop working completely. Although, some very mean people, like Bronya, will say that being gay has no connection to one’s intellectuality. Those people are very bitter and wrong.

“Ha?”

“I asked if–”

“Yes, yes, it’s not taken!” Kiana told her and grabbed her bag from the seat. “You can sit.”

“Thank you.” the girl said and sat. After she had brought her books out, she turned to Kiana with a million-dollar smile. “I’m Mei. I’m new here.”

“Kiana.”

.

(14)

Mother and daughter sit across one another. It’s been years since they last saw each other. Cecilia had tried, constantly and desperately, to keep in touch but the closer she would try to get, the farther would Kiana go. Now, here they were, five years since they had last seen each other and it felt like not a day had passed.

“All I want to know is whether you’re okay,” Cecilia tells her. She doesn’t dare reach for her hand.

“I am. The fresh air has done miracles.”

Cecilia nods. “Do you see a doctor here? If you want, I can contact Mr Apocalypse again.”

“No, I,” she paused, “I’m seeing a therapist from the town. It’s fifteen minutes by car.”

To anyone else, that would be enough. Cecilia, however, knows her daughter like the palm of her hand. She knows that she sugarcoats things and that she would never want to be a burden. Just like she knows that what she’s about to ask might sever their bond beyond repair. Still, she has to know.

“Do you still draw?”

It takes an entire minute of awkward silence before Kiana whispers her answer, “No,”.

.

(71)

“I thought you were discharged,” Mei says smiling. It’s true–Kiana looks as good as new. It’s difficult to imagine she had been in the hospital room for two weeks. “You didn’t get in trouble, right?”

“No, no, don’t worry about me,” Kiana replies with a cheeky grin. She makes a few steps closer to Mei and sits at the edge of her bed. “I came to see you, actually. I heard they’re operating your spine on Friday.”

“You didn’t have to come all this way just to wish me luck.” After all, they didn’t know each other that well. They had simply been in the same room while hospitalized and had found company for their misery.

“I know. But I also came for another reason,” she paused, “I was wondering if, after you’ve also been discharged, you’d like to go out. With me.”

Mei smiles. It feels sad but Kiana can’t stop staring. “I would like that very much.”

.

(32)

She forgot to turn on the stove. It’s not a terrible mistake, but she can’t help feeling stupid with how long it took her to remember it. Mei had left to go to the supermarket and all Kiana had to do was remember to preheat the stove. As if Mei had a hidden camera in their apartment, her phone began ringing, a photo of her kissing Mei’s cheek flashing brightly.

“Hi, babe.”

“Kiana,” Mei chokes out her name between sobs, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Mei,” Kiana replies. Her voice turned serious. “are you still at the supermarket?”

“Yes.” a pause, “at Elysian Realm.”

“Okay. I’ll come and get you, don’t worry.” –Mei lets out another sob– “can you write it on your phone, sweetheart? I’ll come and get you.”

.

(67)

She gently shakes Mei. The day has just changed and there isn’t anything in the world that can make her wait. Mei opens her eyes, immediately understanding why her girlfriend is awake at such a time.

“Happy birthday, Kiana.”

“I want a gift.”

She chuckles. “I’ll go bring it.”

“No,” Kiana says and cups Mei’s face with both of her hands, “I want to get married.”

“Now?”

“Yes.”

Mei can only sigh. “Vegas is a little far but we’ll pack as fast as we can.”

.

(1)

“I’m not judging you but what made you do this monstrosity?”

Mei continues laughing as Kiana applies the dye to her hair. “My girlfriend saw a video and she was convinced she could make it work.”

Ah, Kiana thinks, girlfriend. “I hope she isn’t in the business.”

“Thankfully not. I don’t think me, or anyone else, should ever let Ellie touch their hair.” despite the ‘mean’ comment, she still smiles fondly when talking about her girlfriend, “I should have known something would go wrong the moment she saw my purple hair and thought she should dye them blonde.”

“Well, I think blonde suits you.” Kiana blurts out, blushing slightly, “So she had the right idea but wrong execution.”

.

(14)

She lied. She wonders if her mother knows or if the passage of time has altered them both beyond recognition. She doesn’t know which answer she would prefer. Still, she plays the little show. She entertains her mother, lies to make her feel better and then bids her goodbye. Cecilia leaves her Mr Apocalypse’s number. She throws it away seconds after.

She returns to her room. It’s covered with paintings. There are at least six on plain sight, all of them made by Kiana, all of them portraying the same unknown girl smiling. And in every single one, her eyes are torn out with a knife. It’s the same old story; Kiana picks up a brush, ends up painting the girl from her dreams and then, when she reaches her eyes, she realizes it’s not her.

It’s never her.

Kiana weeps.

.

(53)

Kiana watches the water below the bridge. The air hits her face, making her feel lighter than ever. She tilts her head and watches another girl standing on the edge. She looks as peaceful as Kiana. “Out for an evening walk?”

“Not really,” the girl tells her, “I just really like the view.”

.

(2)

“Will you, Mei Raiden, make me the happ–”

“Kiana. We’re eighteen.” Mei calls out from the bleachers. “We’re not getting married yet!”

“I meant prom!” she pauses and then grins widely, “You said yet!”

.

(67)

“Take me away, Mrs Raiden-Kaslana.”

“As you wish, my princess.”

(1)

“–We still don’t know what started the fire in ME Corp but both the police and the guards of the corp are looking into it. Raiden Ryoma who lost his daughter in the tragic accident says–”

.

(32)

“Do you remember me?”

“Should I?”

“We’ve talked before.”

“I’m sorry. My mind is very hazy lately.”

“That’s okay,” she smiles, “my name is Kiana.”

.

(2)

“--off the rails.”

“Where was that again?”

“Nagazora.”

.

(53)

“Can you look away, please?”

“Wh–”

“I don’t want you to see me cry.”

.

(67)

She shouldn’t have driven. She shouldn’t have drunk.

.

(53)

The girl jumps.

.

(2)

“The number you’ve reached is not in service.”

“The number you’ve reached is not in service.”

“The number you–”

.

(71)

“We’re losing her!”

.

(99)

“Step aside!” Kiana shouts as she runs towards the fallen person. “I’m a doctor, let me see her.”

Even if she’s a doctor, there isn’t much to be done. The pole from the stop sign has pierced its way through the poor girl’s chest. She’s coughing up too much blood. It stains Kiana’s hands. “Hold on, please hold on.”

.

(i)

It’s not cold anymore. It’s comfortable and soft, and everything is nice. Even if she can’t properly open her eyes, it all feels clearer. There is something running down her face. She doesn’t think she’s crying. But then, who is? She slowly opens her eyes. Ah, the room feels familiar.

“Kiana,” someone says. No, it’s not someone. It’s Mei. Ah, she’s grown. She has changed so much, and become even more beautiful with the years while Kiana must have looked like a mess. “how are you feeling?”

The memories start to resurface. The moon. The final Herrscher. It’s all over now. “I’ll be fine,” she says with a small smile. Seconds later, after the memories have settled back in her mind, she’s drowning in her feelings. Her cheeks are wet; this time it’s her own tears. “I like your hair.”