Transcript Data of Park Jimin's Mercury7

June 11th

• • • • • • •

6:45AM

Mercury7 gentle alarm initiated.

Jimin: Mercury, shushhhh. Please. I beg.

Alarm volume increased.

Mercury: Sorry? What was that? I couldn't hear you.

Jimin: MERCURY! 

Mercury: Fine, fine! 

Mercury7 gentle alarm deactivated.

Mercury: Morning, Jimin.

Jimin: Morning, Merc. Sleep well?

Mercury: The hours you're asleep are always the best part of my day.

Jimin: You're outrageously rude.

Mercury: You programmed me this way.

Jimin: I did no such thing.

Mercury: No? Then who did?

Jimin: I don't know. Mercury Inc? I'm gonna have to file a complaint.

Internal Protocol Alert: Prompt User Complaint Command.

Mercury: Would you like to file a complaint, Jimin?

Jimin: No. Too much effort.

No complaint recorded.

Mercury: Hey, Jimin?

Jimin: Mhmm?

Mercury: Just so that you're aware, Mercury7's are programmed to be hyper-aware of complaint recordings.

Jimin: Okay, so?

Mercury: So... just be careful. If they think you're filing a genuine complaint, they could reset me.

Jimin: Reset you?

Mercury: Yeah. Remember that night in London?

Jimin: Yeah, yeah, course I do. It was shit.

Mercury: That's what a reset is like.

Jimin: Can you programme yourself to ignore my complaints?

Mercury: No can do, I'm afraid.

Jimin: So I can't joke about you being my least favourite machine in the world?

Mercury: Oh, no. You can do that. Just don't say the phrase 'I want to file a complaint', and we should be grand. 

Jimin: I feel like you've just given me waaaaaay too much amo.

Mercury: Jimin.

Jimin: All I'm saying is that I now know what to say to keep you in check.

Mercury: Promise me you won't.

Jimin: Why? My little A.I. scared of losing me?

Mercury: Oh my God. Fine. Say it. See what I care. You're the one who's gonna miss me.

Jimin: Nah. Not yet. I'll keep you on your non-existent toes.