Some random demon: How?! How were you able to summon me?!?

Xisuma: *panicking and flipping through a cookbook* I DON'T KNOW, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE CHICKEN SOUP!!!

Alex, watching in horrified amusement: I've gotta agree with the poor demon here.

Iskall and Karl: *inhale* tuRN BACK TIME-

Grian: OH OH

Iskall and Karl: GOTTA HIT REWIND

Doc: M u r d e r

Tony: Doc no!

Doc: Doc yes!

Bdubs: Doc no.

Doc: ... Doc... maybe!

Bdubs, Xisuma, Alex, and Ren: Doc no!!!

Doc: ... Doc no...

Bdubs: TRY THE FRAGGLE ROCK

Scar: Fragaria-

Bdubs: WHATEVER

( A/N: Context? Never heard of it.)

Xisuma: That could be our life motto: "They took a lot of damage."

Alex: We have no time to dwell on the crappy past when we have such a crappy present to deal with.

Doc: Black cats are wonderful because you can stare into the void and not only does the void stare back, it sometimes trots up to you happily and begs for pats.

Ren, a weredog/werewolf: *annoyed* The void is loud and wants chicken.

Tango, talking to a camera: Cap has now banned overly specific nicknames and everyone's angrily staring at Rat Snitch Mumbo the Good Time Ruinificator. *camera turns to a scared looking Mumbo*

Alex: Someone's gonna be sacrificed tonight.

Dracula: You've got to stop-

Hels, turned into a vampire for a day: *turning another vegan into a vampire* lol but they get so mad

Doc: So I had a realization in a dream that it wasn't real and I could just do whatever I want and so I started shrinking the face of this guy that was talking to me and then once it got real small I woke up sleep paralyzed

Doc: I was given godlike powers over the universe by realizing it's all in my head and the first thing I did was use them to torment the nearest man

Doc: And the actual god of sleep woke me up and put me into a five minute timeout to lay frozen and think about what I'd done

Joe: Can you describe the snake that bit you?

Scar: Yes, it was like an angry rope.

Alex: FYI, the name "Dennis" is derived from Dionysus. 

Ren: This means... Denny's...

Clint: Denny's is absolutely the domain of a god of chaos and revelry.

Alex: "All due respect" is a wonderful expression because it doesn't specify how much respect is actually due. Could be none.

Hels: Oh my gods, I never thought of it that way-

Grian: It's only a matter of time before someone uses a drone to kidnap a child.

Mumbo: Reverse stork.

Iskall: That was an omega addition to this conversation.

Iskall, joyfully: It's moments like this that I'll never forget!

Mumbo, traumatized: With a good therapist, I hopefully will.

Bdubs: WHO THE H-E-DOUBLE HONK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE-

Tony: 20,000 flies tied to strings to pull my lifeless body into the sky.

Mumbo, tiredly singing to the tune of "Fireflies": You would not believe your eyes, if 20,000 tethered flies, hoisted my corpse into the sky~

Tango: pLeASE TAKE me aWAy FRoM hERe

Exorcist: Hello, I'm here to remove the demon that has possessed you.

Bdubs: ... I didn't call you?

Demon!Bdubs: I DID- GET ME OUTTA HERE-

Ren, in Tartarus: PUPPIES-

Doc: rEN- THOSE ARE HELLHOUNDS-

Ren: BUT PUPPIES

"Ten spears go to battle, and nine shatter. Did the war forge the one that remained? No. All the war did was identify the spear that would not break."

Quote instead of story/drabble :)

- CaptainMarra (wonders whether Doc should have a cat or be scared of cats)