Word Count : 1849

Requested By : RachelGreenery

Warnings : Y'all know the drill.

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This is semi-crack and idk what I- or anyone else- is gonna do about it.

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The Watchers try to get onto the Hermitcraft server. But what they gaze into just as they are getting ready to attack looks like hell on earth more than an actual functioning server… 
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"Eh-Suma," A quiet voice called out, grabbing the Admin's attention.

Xisuma looked up from his Admin console and peered forward. Squinting into a more shady area of his base, he cocked his head to the side. "Xeno? What are you doing?"

Xisuma's twin brother XenoVoid, stepped closer and came into the light. He was wearing his usual battle armor that was dyed red instead of green. His helmet however was tucked under his arm.

Red eyes locked with X's blue ones.

"We've got a serious problem," Xeno started. "Its the Watchers. They have plans to attack our server."

The Hermitcraft Admin flinched and made his consoles disappear. Xeno now fully had his attention. "What? Why are they attacking us? We haven't done anything to them."

Xeno's face twisted into an unknown expression to Xisuma and shook his head. "You know as much as I do. But I can only assume that it's because of Grian's history with them."

Xisuma clenched his hands into fists. "If they want to try and take him, they'll go through me first." He threatened.

Xeno looked unphased, however, and remained ever deadpanned. "I know, brother. But now you need to prepare your server."

The Admin licked his lips from behind the gas mask part of his helmet. He turned his head down and stared at the floor as he thought.

After a moment of silence, Xisuma looked back up at Xeno. "Send out a comm to all the Hermits."

Xeno frowned and put his helmet back on over his head. "A comm saying what?"

"Operation Sugar Bomb."

Xeno recoiled slightly and looked at his twin with a perplexed and shocked expression.

"May the gods save us all."

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= Person Switch and Time Skip =
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Grian quickly flew to Scar's base. Having woken up to a message in his comm saying only the following-

"Opperation Sugar Bomb",

There was- without a doubt that the e.x Watcher had multiple questions. He had originally flown to Mumbo and Iskall's bases, but neither were there.

Their beds were a mess. Some of their more common items that they had on them were still in chests and whatever Redstone systems they had running were off. Those things alone helped Grian deduce that they seemed to have taken off in a big hurry.

But now he was trying to figure out why.

Landing in Scar's Enchanted Jungle, Grian quickly sprinted toward Lary the snail.

"Scar? Scar!" Grian called out.

Getting the latter that led up inside of Lary into sight, Grian spied GoodTimesWithScar moving hastily around between different chests that had been scattered about. Scar otherwise didn't turn his head up or acknowledge Grian's presence.

The e.x Watcher approached the hermit in Wizard cosplay. "Scar, did you see the message in chat?"

Scar jumped back with a startled yelp. Just now locking eyes with Grian, Scar placed a hand over his chest and breathed once again.

"Oh my gods, Grian. You can't sneak up on a man like that!" Scar complained.

Xelqua shot him a curious look. "I called your name a bunch of times when I finally saw you." Grian's eyes traveled down to the chests Scar had been rummaging through. "What are you evening doing?"

Scar stepped up to the chests once again and went straight back to digging through them. "Preparing." He replied curtly.

Grian frowned. "Preparing? For what?"

"Opperation Sugar Bomb."

Grian held back the urge to throw his hands in the air. He had no idea what Scar was talking about.

Biting his tounge to prevent himself from being rude, Grian drew in a breath and asked his question in a more reasonable manner. "Would you mind compromising with me here? I don't think I know what Opperation Sugar Bomb is."

Scar twitched at the sentence. He looked up at the e.x Watcher. "Snap, right, you wouldn't know what OSB would be because you haven't been with us as long as the others,"

Drawing in a deep breath, Scar ran his fingers through his bangs and exhaled slowly. "OSB is a code name that Xisuma had us create. It was to code word to allow us to go completely ape shit."

Xelqua blinked. He wasn't sure- but this was most likely the first time he had heard Scar curse. "What? Why would Xeno send something out like that?"

Scar dug through the chest he was standing in front of some more before tossing an iron helmet to him which he caught skillfully. "On such short notice? Hell if I know, but I'd use that helmet so you don't get hit and lose consciousness. Their probably already getting Mumbo hyped up on a sugar by now."

"Sugar?"

Scar made no further comment as he placed a helmet on his on head then turned and sprinted away from Grian, leaving the strawberry blond alone with confusion swimming through his mind.

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Watcher Two walked up to their partner Watcher One. "Preperations to take the Hermitcraft server by force have been complete."

Watcher One smiled as they had their back towards their partner. "Good. Now prepare yourself. We enter through the portal in five minutes."

Watcher Two gave a wordless nod before turning on their heel to head towards the portal.

Time Skip
Watcher One was the first to step through the portal with sword in hand. They where going to step further onto the server and destroy the nearest build but-

The nearest build was already in flames.

Watcher Two exited the portal right after their partner also armed with a blade. They too, were extremely confused and shocked.

"What is this?" Watcher Two questioned outloud. Sounding near scandalized. "Has someone already attacked this server?"

Watcher One opened their mouth to reply, but they were interrupted by a loud explosion going off, along with the start up of-

Polka music?

Confused but still on guard, the two Grand Watchers flew up into the air and headed towards the source of the sounds.

As the Polka music got louder, the Watchers eventually spied two of the many Hermits that resided on the server. The two quickly landed down and approached. They brought up their weapons to kill the players as they had originally intended but-

The two Hermits were dancing?

Watcher One could recognize the two Hermits specifically as XisumaVoid and XenoVoid. The twins, with Xisuma being the Admin.

Xisuma and Xeno were dancing with each other to the music that was radiating from multiple large speakers. They both had one arm behind their backs and the other outstretched so their palms were touching as they skipped and moved in a circle around each other like planets.

Watcher Two shook their head before they approached and raised their sword to kill the Admin and his twin.

After a few steps forward, Watcher Two was stopped by the sound of the tnt ignition- case in point- they froze on the spot and turned their head towards the lit blocks that seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

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Biffa lowered his flame bow, watching one of the intruders get swarmed by smoke.

[Redacted #] blew up

The cyborg hermit could only grin to himself at the message that appeared on his comm and on everyone else's.

Whether everyone saw it or not was another question.

Xisuma and Xeno- despite the explosion and threat to their lives- continued to dance to the music that was blasting. All a part of the act.

Lifting a hand up to one side of his head and pushing a button that was near his ear, he radioed Zedaph.

"Zed here, over."

Biffa watched as the remaining intruder appeared to look around for where the TNT had come from.

"What's the progress on Mumbo's sugar high? Over." Biffa questioned in a lower whisper.

Some static floated through Biffa's ear piece before the ZIT member spoke up again. "He's just sitting here right now, he needed more time so TFC and Joe went off to buy more time. Over."

Taking a moment, Biffa stood up and brought his bow back up. He pulled an arrow back and fired it at the remaining Watcher.

The Watcher stopped, then turned quickly on their heel and snagged the arrow out of the air. Their head turned in Biffa's direction.

Biffa bit his lip, then quickly ducked away and headed further into the shopping district. "Stand by, Zedaph. Keep me posted. We could really use a sugar high. Over."

"Roger."

Breaking off into a run, Biffa neared iJevin's position.

A loud, angry scream made itself known behind the cyborg as he ran.

Biffa could hear the loud footsteps of the Watcher slowly gaining on him.

The cyborg Hermit turned one of the corner streets sharply before he finally went out of view.

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Watcher two stepped through the portal to Hermitcraft once more. Their anger was increased now at being so embarrassingly killed by such a foolish action.

But this time upon stepping through the portal, their ears were met with loud screaming and laughter.

With confusion now in their head, Watcher two gazed around before they saw who was screaming.

One of the Hermit players was in the air wearing some odd costume, hurling eggs at some of the others. The player's laughter was loud, but not as loud as some of the others.

Another player was standing in the middle of a ring of fire with many different structural blocks cracking and burning around him.

Watcher two couldn't think of why these players were doing all of this. But it only further helped his reasons of why this server needed to go down.

Growling, Watcher two approached the group of players that were running around like children. Brandishing their sword so they were ready to kill.

[Redacted # was slain by Joe Hill's Fanfiction]

Watcher two flinched upon seeing the message in the server chat. None of the players seemed to notice it though as they continued to be as loud and rambunctious.

Ceasing their movement, Watcher two froze on the spot as a powerful aura reached them.

"What's up?"

Watcher two turned around.

Standing behind them was one of the older looking players. He had his arms at his sides and he had a huge grin on his face as he looked up at Watcher two.

"Not you." The hermit finished.

Suddenly the world seemed to shake and tremble all on it's own.

The older member began to hover in the air as his arms lifted from his sides.

The sky darkened then brightened then darkened again.

The world suddenly went dark once more for Watcher two.

[Redacted # was slain by TinFoilChef's Ultimate Power]

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Fin

And now you know why the Watchers don't try to Invade Hermitcraft-

Oshfudjfiendiseu- HA- IM ALIVE- I'VE POSTED- WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!

>B:D