Bella looking at X: Whatcha got there?

X with Ex and a smoothie: A smoothie.

-----

Grian: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos.

Mumbo: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard.

-----
Mumbo: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail

Grian: No it's my fault, I shouldn't've used my one phone call to prank call the police

----

Grian : Don't worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve.

Mumbo: I think you mean cards.

Grian , pulling knives out of their sleeves: No, I do not.

------

Xisuma: *Accidentally hits Bella in the face*

Xisuma: *Trying to decide between saying 'I'm fucking sorry' and 'Are you okay'*

Xisuma: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!

Bella: What's wrong with you?!

-----

Xisuma: Bad things keep happening to me, like I have bad luck or something.

Bella: Xisuma, you don't have bad luck. The reason bad things happen to you is because you're a dumbass.

-----

Tango, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him

Impulse: You did WHAT–

Zedaph: William Snakepeare

-----

Tango: We need a distraction.

Impulse: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?

Zedaph, whispering: My time has come

-----

Tango: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.

Impulse: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Tango: Yes!

Zedaph: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

----

Grian: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Bdubs?

Bdubs: ... No.

Scar: I do!

Grian: I know, Scar.

Scar: I'm sad!

Grian: I know, Scar.

------

Grian: While I'm gone, Bdubs, you're in charge.

Bdubs: Yes!!!

Grian, whispering: Scar, you're secretly in charge.

Scar: Obviously.

----

Store Worker: Would Grian please come to the front desk?

Grian, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker: points to Bdubs and Scar

Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?

Bdubs and Scar, simultaneously: We got lost :(

Grian: I didn't even bring you guys here with me-

-------

*Doc and Bdubs are doing something absurdly dangerous*

Doc: I think Houdini did something like this once! Why, if I recall correctly, he was out of the hospital in no time!

Bdubs, deadpan: Well that's encouraging.

-----

Bdubs: What is your biggest weakness?

Doc: I can be uncooperative.

Bdubs: Okay, can you give me an example?

Doc: No.

-----

Bdubs: I'm 10 times funnier and sexier than you

Doc: 10 times 0 is still 0 though

Bdubs: Jokes on you, I can't do math

-----

Xisuma: You're my best friend, I would do anything for you.

Bella: I want you to eat 3 meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule.

Xisuma: Absolutely not.

----

Xisuma : Which is correct, seven and five IS thirteen, or seven and five ARE thirteen?

Bella: Neither.

Bella: Because it's twelve.

-----

Kidnapper: We have your child

Bella: I don't have a child?

Kidnapper: Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?

Bella: Oh god, you have Etho

----

That wraps up Incorrect quotes 5. I count Incorrect quotes (Void Brothers Edition) As #4.

----