Here we are again... thought of this storyline while on the toilet. 

Ships: None really. Its more platonic.

Date started: Saturday, December 7th, 11:07 PM 

Date ended: Sunday, December 8th, 1:50 AM

Date edited and reposted: Jan 8th, 12:20 PM

Word count: 1378 (not including the ending thing)

(Ok, here we go)

*brain instantly cues third life evil anvil song*

AHHHHHHHHHHH

Doc's POV ("HUH? SHADE? WHY THE HECK ARE YOU TRYING TO WRITE DOC YOU DANG FOOL! WRITE ETHO OR BDUBS OR ANYONE ELSE! You've barely even WATCHED doc you moron! YOU'VE WATCHED LIKE, TWELVE of his hermitcraft episodes, WHY-" "SHUT UP! I can do this. Ok.")

Doc swiped sweat from his forehead as he dug, feeling his back stiffen as he went. It had always seemed like a big goal- digging a big hole as a mega base- but the perimeter was more than that. It represented the hivemind, and everything doc has worked so hard to create with his brand. The GOAT. The mastermind. 

Ok hear me out real quick we're gonna pretend that NHO was a thing in season nine. Kay? Kay. "Seasons" dont really exist in this reality, things are just happening. Oh! And we're gonna pretend like i've watched more than clips of the NHO. I WATCHED BDUBS, OK? And i was a basic Grian and Mumbo watcher for years before I branched out. Oh wait... i watched Etho too. what the heck was I doing?? Oh, one more thing? Pretend like I dont sound like im high as a kite. Im so sick right now. 

He got a ping on his communicator, which startled him. He misplaced a tnt block and panicked, jumping backwards. The blast still caught him, and he flew up in the air even more, landing hard on his rear. 

"Shit! Oh, SHIT."  

Doc angrily checked his communicator, seeing what the disturbance was about. It was Bdubs, rambling about how no one respected his "shreep schedule". Doc rolled his eyes, cursing Bdubs' name quietly, rubbing his back. Maybe a break wasn't such a bad idea. 

Doc attempted to fly out of the hole, before realizing he was out of rockets. He kicked a stray pebble, cursing Sweet Baby Cheesit's name when it hurt more than he expected. So, with a sore back and sore toe, he began to dig his way out of the hole. 

After about 10 minutes, he broke the surface, gasping for breath. He flung himself on the ground, huffing and puffing, dots flashing across his vision. After about five minutes of gasping for breath, his vision cleared and he got his senses back. The first thing he noticed was what sounded like footsteps and... bleating? Doc shook his head, thinking it must be a sheep. Except... Doc killed all the animals around here, nature and technology dont mix, after all. 

Um, Doc ya hypocrite? YOU'RE A GOAT CREEPER ROBOT.

The GOAT sat up quickly, looking around. Seeing nothing, he flopped back down. Great, now he's hearing things. Suddenly, he felt a presence behind him. He turned onto his stomach and moved his head up. Facing him was what looked like a fawn-human hybrid... baby. After making eye contact, the little doe flopped onto her butt and giggled. 

Doc warily sat up, then began to scramble to his feet. The little doe hybrid followed suit. She looked to be about three years old, a toddler, with stunning auburn hair that shone in the light. She had pale skin and freckles dotted across her face, two small antlers, and a little stub of a tail that was waving frantically. Despite having come from seemingly nowhere, she looked relatively well kept. Her clothes were a little dirty, and there were some twigs in her hair, but she didn't seem unhealthy. Quickly, Doc pulled up the messages function on his communicator. 

<Docm77> NHO MEETING NOW 

(You do not know how much I wanted to make Etho say Neeowww but... lol the story isnt goin that way sry)

Doc began to crouch down tentativley.

"Do you... talk?" The hybrid just giggled, losing her balance and flopping back down on her rear. Doc sighed, rubbing his temples. He didn't have time for children. Maybe Xisuma could take her, or Bdubs. Really anyone but him. 

"Just... follow me. We are finding a different place for you to stay." Doc turned on his heel and walked off, his lab coat whipping around him.

The child seemed unperturbed by Doc's gruff behavior, giggling and standing up once more, running to catch up. Clumsily, she tripped on her own feet, landing flat on her face. Doc looked over his shoulder briefly, just in time to see her look up, face covered in gravel, tears welling in her eyes. 

Doc ran over, feeling thoroughly flustered. What was he supposed to do with this?

"No... dont cry, stand up you're fine..." Doc flinched as the girl began to whimper. The hermit sighed, wishing one of the other more child oriented NHO members was there to assist. Not knowing what else to do, he scooped her up, holding her at almost an arms length. He nearly ran to the NHO meeting spot, waiting impatiently for the others to arrive. The redhead squirmed in Doc's metal grip, but Doc hesitated to put her down, worried she'd run away. As if on cue, the sound of rockets could be heard and the Etho and Beef  arrived, looking windswept. Seconds later, the sound of pounding footsteps filled the air, and Bdubs cantered up, slowing his steed to a halt. He dismounted, revealing that he wasn't as tall as he appeared after "getting off his high horse."

Usually some pleasantries were exchanged at the beginning of NHO meetings, maybe some teasing, but not today. 

"What is THAT."

"Its a baby Etho, surely you've seen a baby in your life."

"Where'd you get a KID, doc? And when?"

"Wait... DOC HAS A KID??"

"Doc has a wife??"

"Guys!" Doc sighed, rubbing his temple once more. "It's not MY KID! How could it be my- Geez, not the point. I found her wandering around my perimeter. I don't know where she came from or why she's here, or "whose she is"  but she's here. And IM not keeping her."

Etho was the first to speak up. 

"I cant keep her. My base isn't fit for kids! I have serious redstoning to do. We should turn her over to Xisuma, and forget this ever happened."

Bdubs looked affronted. "She's so CUTE though! Can't we keep her?? We can't just throw her away!" 

"Oh so are you going to take her?"

"God, no! Of course not! I have SEVENTEEN horses to take care of on my OWN! That's dangerous!"

Beef sighed, seeing how the responsibility was coming down to him, as it always did.

"Guys, if we're going to.... Keep her... we might as well take shifts. Doc will take her first, because he found her." Doc began to protest, but Beef pushed on. "I'll take her next, then Bdubs, then Etho. We'll switch every week. How does that sound?"

There were some faint noises of agreement, besides some hissing coming from Doc. "You fools better help me set up to deal with... that." He pointed to the girl, who was giggling as Bdubs held her up to sit on the back of his horse.

The next seven or eight hours were spent making doc's "base" livable for the little one. Well... first they had to make a base that wasn't just a pit. It was a medium sized, mostly wooden house, but it was good enough. 

Doc had a bedroom on the main level, with a kitchen, bathroom, and main living space. Upstairs the girl had a room, a large room with big windows and posters of horses (curtesy of Bdubs). 

While Beef and Bdubs built the house and Doc collected resources, Etho took care of the kid. When the NHO regrouped, they were surprised to find Etho playing tag and roughhousing with the kid, even giving her a nickname, "Gem." 

"Because of her hair! I mean... we have to call her something!" He defended, putting on a tough guy act. He even coaxed out a few words from the little doe, and once she got started, she hardly stopped. Mostly it was repeat sentences, but it was something! 

"Bye bye! Eevo! Bye!" Doc frowned as Gem wriggled around next to him, waving farewell to her new "uncles." A smile did come to his face when he overheard Etho grumbling about "not minding taking the next shift with the kid." 

Guys!!! I hope you liked this!!! I think I might continue, because I really like this. Like, really really like this. Anyways, im going absolutely nuts. Truly crazy i swear. This is like an out of body experience lol. I have a fever of 100, which sounds normal except i run cold apparently. So im like four degrees warmer than i should be. And very dizzy. And my throat hurts. And i didnt check this for typos so... sorry about that 💀 And uhhh WHAT IS HAPPENING! Sorry if this was short, but I think i'll follow up soon!

Anyways.... Stay cool!

-Shade