Life with Gerard compared to carrying on without him was a never ending study of startling contrasts which absolutely fascinated Frank, because everything had changed now that Gerard was his boyfriend again in the best way possible, but it seemed that he was the only one who noticed it.

On the surface, everything was the same, and that was all anyone saw, so even if Frank was smiling more often, or paying better attention in class, it wasn't a noteworthy attitude shift, and if a bystander had been asked if something was different with Frank lately, they would have most likely said no.

The only people who were aware that Gerard and Frank had gotten back together were Ryan, Brendon, and Pete, the latter of which Frank had been nervous about telling since he'd been afraid of recreating the uncomfortable tension that they'd only recently worked through, but Pete had seemed fine, and Frank had downplayed his excitement by a fair margin, but he'd still wanted Pete to share in this with him even if they had conflicting views on his relationship.

But besides those three, no one else was able to see underneath Frank's skin, no one knew about the core of contentment that Frank harbored within him, the sensation growing every time he awoke to a "good morning" text from Gerard or he spied his car parked a few blocks away so he could drive him closer to the school, saving Frank from the uncomfortable bus ride he would have had to endure otherwise even if Gerard had to drop him off a few blocks away so they wouldn't be seen arriving together.

But those occurrences, as simple as they were, meant the world to Frank. Each quick kiss and endearment energized him for hours afterward, making the stress of homework coupled with his shifts at the restaurant that much easier to bear until almost nightly Frank dozed off with a smile on his face instead of tears in his eyes.

Frank couldn't truly explain with words how being Gerard's again had improved his life so much, because when he truly took a step back and observed their relationship with a critical eye, he had to admit that it wasn't what he'd envisioned the few times he had entertained the idea of actually having a proper boyfriend.

Still, it was incredible nonetheless; Frank compared it to looking through the other side of a mirror, because he was still him, he still had all of his burdens and old wounds marring his insides, but he was seeing things with a new set of eyes, the shadows that had been obscuring his vision for so long had finally been lifted, allowing him to view the potential his existence held instead of only the darkness and the hopelessness that had been such a prevalent part of him until Gerard had come along.

Frank didn't actually even see Gerard all that often, definitely with much less frequency than he had during the summer, but they were both busy after all. Frank had to balance his responsibilities as a student along with making sure that he was setting aside time for his mother and Pete even if he'd love nothing more than to spend all of his free moments with Gerard, and Gerard had papers to grade and Mikey to look after not to mention appointments that he was actually going to now much to Frank's relief, so it was to be expected that they'd be apart more often than not, especially since the only place they could truly be together was Gerard's apartment.

They made up for it with texts though and so many phone calls that Frank began making sure that he hid the phone bill from his mother just in case she remarked on his sudden spike of activity. He could always brush it off as a new friend he'd made at school if he was caught of course, but it was better to avoid rousing his mother's suspicions entirely, not that she'd ever imagine he was using all of his minutes to speak with his teacher even if she did find out.

But as much as Frank adored Gerard's messages and hearing his voice, the best occasions by far were when Frank was able to spend a few hours with Gerard in his place which was quickly becoming a second home to Frank, and even if he had to wait until his mother was asleep so he could sneak off, and although he was always exhausted and half dead on his feet the next day, it was always worth it when he got to feel Gerard's lips on his, when Gerard would hold him close and murmur how much he missed him.

Gerard seemed to be doing better too, he was drinking less at least, he was turning to Frank when he got overwhelmed or frustrated instead of the bottle, he'd even asked Frank to help him clean up his room the other evening, telling Frank to dispose of certain pill bottles that he'd been abusing which had Frank's chest swelling with pride and adoration, because Gerard was trying to mend himself, his words hadn't been false promises, and although Frank knew that Gerard was going to continue to experience a wide range of ups and downs, that was something Frank was prepared to deal with, and it was so much easier to help Gerard now that he was no longer attempting to shut him out.

Frank craved more though, of course he did, it was only a natural thing when he was forced to sit in class with Gerard a few feet away and pretend that he was just another teacher, when had to head home to make sure his mother ate before maybe getting the chance to see Gerard, when he had to sleep early so he wouldn't be too tired for a test the next day, cutting their phone call short even though Frank wasn't even remotely tired.

Frank wished they were closer in age, or that Gerard wasn't in a position of authority so their relationship would truly be legal the moment he turned eighteen. He missed feeling Gerard's hands on every inch of his bare skin instead of just his face, he'd love to be able to eat dinner in public with Gerard instead of having to get takeout so they could retreat back to the safety of a closed door, but honestly, those were paltry things that would come with time, and even if they didn't, Frank was happy - truly happy, so all of the events that were barred to them failed to bother him, they were more of an annoyance than anything else.

And before Frank knew it, the day he was waiting for arrived - Halloween, better known as his birthday. Everything wasn't going to be perfect once he was eighteen of course, it never would be probably. Frank was starting to realize that, but he didn't need it to be, he just needed Gerard, and the fact that they were one step closer to being able to properly be with each other had Frank thrumming with excitement from the moment he woke up, and even the fact that his mother didn't recognize him that morning wasn't able to put a dent in his joyful mood.

Unfortunately for Frank, his birthday fell on a Friday this year, which meant he still had to attend classes, but since Gerard would be there, he didn't mind all that much, especially since all he'd desired for his birthday was to spend time with the older man, which he would be able to do later on since he'd made sure that he didn't have to work this evening.

Frank had insisted that he didn't want Gerard to do anything special for him, simply being with him was enough, and okay - Frank was maybe hoping that Gerard would be thinking along the same lines as he was, which for lack of a better term were all very sexual, but could you blame him? Frank missed sex a lot, especially given how much of it he used to have and how amazing being with Gerard in that fashion was, so being able to finally sleep with him again was the best present he could ever receive.

Gerard had been reluctant to agree, but he'd finally given in when Frank had refused to kiss him for the rest of the evening until he promised that he wouldn't buy Frank anything, or throw him any sort of party, which was more of a punishment for him than anything, but it had worked, and even if Frank felt a bit guilty for preventing Gerard from going all out, and maybe a small part of him wouldn't mind being spoiled by his boyfriend, he didn't want Gerard to spend money on him, and any sort of get together would be a sad affair given the fact that Frank's only friend was Pete and Frank was nervous about having both him and Gerard in the same room.

Pete was already a bit miffed that Frank wasn't going to be spending his birthday with him, although Frank had hung out with him just last night, but still - it was a tradition for Frank to sleep over at his house on Halloween for the past few years, and Frank could tell his friend was bothered by the lack of it, even though he had smiled weakly at Frank and said it was his special day after all so he could do whatever he wanted on it.

Frank would make sure to see Pete later on this weekend though, and honestly, he didn't want to think about his disappointed friend on the first birthday he'd been looking forward to since his father left, so he pushed all traces of negativity from his mind, getting dressed quickly before turning on his phone only to see a message from Gerard that had been sent at exactly midnight.

"Happy birthday Frankie xxx"

It was a simple text, but the fact that Gerard had kept himself awake just to make sure he could send it on the thirty-first had Frank grinning broadly, especially since he knew that Gerard had to be up even earlier than usual for a teacher's meeting or something like that, which also meant that he couldn't drive Frank to school today, but Frank didn't care. He would see him in class after all, and since it was a Friday, they would have the entire night to spend with each other. That was enough to have Frank in motion, all dredges of sleep sloughing off of him as he dressed hurriedly so he could begin his day that much quicker.

And it didn't matter that Frank's mother didn't wish him happy birthday before leaving for work, it wasn't like he was expecting it when she barely even seemed to register that he was there, or that Pete hadn't texted him yet either although he had to be awake by now since he had class as well, because Frank was done wallowing. He couldn't change the bad things in his life, he couldn't fix everything, but he could enjoy the positive aspects he was blessed with, and he was determined to do that today.

~~~

Frank's anticipation regarding his birthday didn't reach its pinnacle until it was almost over, because he wasn't able to get away from his other responsibilities until almost half past nine in the evening. As much as he'd wanted to go to Gerard's directly after class let out, the urge only intensified by the short note Gerard had slipped onto his desk along with his homework from last night wishing him a happy birthday again, Frank couldn't leave his mother to fend for herself, not after she'd been in such a bad state this morning.

Frank had let Gerard know this through text, not trusting himself enough to impart the information in person mostly because he knew once he started speaking with Gerard he'd convince himself that his mother could survive on her own for one night. Gerard had encouraged Frank to take all the time that he needed, saying that he had a few last minute preparations to make anyway, which had Frank on edge in regards to what he was planning, but he decided to leave it be for now.

Frank had done the right thing by returning home first though, because when Frank's mother had made her way through the front door, she'd been practically comatose, not responding to words or touch, it even got to the point where Frank was worried that he was going to have to force feed her at one point.

But eventually, she'd finished her dinner and allowed Frank to lead her to bed, and once her breathing had evened out to a steady pattern which assured Frank she was asleep, he'd all but run to Gerard's place, responding to Pete's belated birthday message as he left, satisfied that everything was tied up as well as it could be for the time being only to spy the man himself waiting for him outside the apartment complex in his car.

Gerard had pulled Frank into the vehicle before he'd had the chance to properly greet him, steadfastly ignoring the numerous questions Frank had thrown his way, silencing him with a quick kiss that Frank was all too happy to receive.

And now Frank found himself outside, not to mention blindfolded, his nails digging into Gerard's forearm in an attempt to keep his balance as Gerard led him into the woods, the gesture, although endearing, leaving Frank a bit frustrated since all he'd wanted to do was kiss Gerard and maybe more, not take a hike.

"Do I really have to wear this?" Frank complained after stumbling roughly - again might he add, which was an act that was quickly getting tiresome after the fifth occurrence or so.

"Yes you do." Frank could tell Gerard was smirking although he couldn't see it, the expression was evident in his smug tone, but he did sling his arm around Frank's waist, making almost falling on his face every time he took a step a bit more appealing since it provided him with the opportunity to lean against Gerard's side.

"It's not like I don't know where we are going," Frank continued to argue more for the sake of filling the silence than anything else, but it was obvious that Gerard was taking him back to their spot, Frank highly doubted that Gerard knew of any other places outdoors that Frank would be at all interested in.

"True, but it's still a surprise, and I'm not going to let you ruin it for yourself."

"You're ridiculous," Frank grumbled fondly, shifting closer to Gerard as they continued to walk forward at a steady pace, or as near to one as Frank could maintain without his vision. "When I run into a tree and get a concussion, I expect you to care for me the entire time," Frank teased, enjoying Gerard's exasperated huff as well as the way he tightened his hold around Frank minutely.

"Fine, maybe I'll just take you home then and you won't get to see the present I've worked so hard to put together for you." Gerard tried to nail an offended tone, but Frank easily saw through it to the mirth bubbling beneath the surface.

"Well there is a bed there," Frank grinned cheekily, "so I don't see a problem with that." Frank couldn't help but to not so vaguely point out how he'd really wanted to spend this evening, although doing anything with Gerard was lovely, but Frank had gone without sex for months, and he wasn't embarrassed to admit that he was getting a bit desperate for it.

"Teenagers," Gerard scoffed, "always thinking with their dicks."

"Like you're any better old man," Frank shot back, swallowing down the peals of laughter that were tickling at his throat insistently. "You honestly can't tell me that you're not dying to fuck me again."

Gerard chuckled deeply then, the joyful sound melding with the air before it seeped into Frank's blood stream, leaving him giddy and ecstatic at the fact that they could joke around in this fashion, that they had gone from awkward drunken phone calls and doing their best not to stare at each other excessively during school hours to a comfortable relationship in the span of two short weeks, which was what Frank had been hoping would happen of course, but it still hadn't prepared him for how wonderful being with Gerard again truly was.

"With the way you're acting, it's a good thing I did bring you out here then since Mikey's home, and I'm not in the mood to try and keep you quiet tonight," Gerard spoke once he had contained his giggles, leaving Frank shuddering softly at his words. Having sex in the woods didn't sound all that comfortable honestly, but Frank was more than willing to try it, especially if it meant he got to be as loud as he wanted. "We're here," Gerard announced suddenly, snapping Frank out of his filthy thoughts and back into the present, his skin tingling slightly as Gerard gently removed the blindfold from around his eyes, his touch lingering maybe a bit longer than was necessary, but Frank wasn't at all inclined to complain.

And when Gerard stepped to the side, giving Frank an unobstructed view of the clearing which was so familiar to him, that was no their spot, Frank found his lungs tightening in his chest and his eyes welling with tears as he drank in the change of scenery that Frank had not been expecting.

In hindsight, it was nothing to get emotional over really; Gerard had simply set up a large tent in the center of the meadow, the sides of which had been tied open to reveal a plethora of blankets and pillows on the inside. Surrounding the structure was an abundance of small lanterns that gave their location a cherry glow, highlighting the way the grass swayed in the gentle breeze as well as the look of awe that Frank could feel his face morphing into.

"Gerard...this is," Frank had to pause to suck in a deep breath, hating the way his voice was shaking so much it sounded as if he was on the verge of tears, which he wasn't, not really, he was just a bit overcome by the affectionate gesture was all, "it's perfect."

And it really was, because material possessions meant nothing to Frank, but Gerard had managed to give him a true gift by enhancing a place that meant so much to him, by filling it with another wonderful memory to bury the painful ones, by taking him out in the only way he really could to a location where Frank could be himself, where Frank could be with Gerard and have no one judge him, and honestly, that was the best birthday present in the world.

"Guess you don't want to go back home now?" Gerard smirked happily, his lips hovering near the back of Frank's neck as he crowded close behind him, his fingers settling on Frank's hip bones loosely as Frank continued to gap at the setup that must have taken Gerard most of the evening to pull off. "You really like it though, and be honest with me. I know it's a bit underwhelming, but with you being so stubborn about me not getting you anything, it was the best that I could come up with."

"I love it," Frank blurted out perhaps a bit too quickly, but he wanted to reassure Gerard before he got tangled up in the belief that Frank didn't enjoy his gesture, because he did. It meant so much to him that Gerard had even attempted to put this together in the first place, almost as much as Gerard meant to him in general really, but Frank wasn't sure how to express that with words.

"Yeah?" Gerard queried, the upturn of his mouth physically felt as he buried his face in Frank's shoulder, squeezing him tightly as if Frank's approval was the best thing in the world. "I brought some food too, I thought we could stay out here for the night, just us, if it doesn't get too cold that is. I checked the weather beforehand, and it's not supposed to rain or anything, but you can never be sure you know -"

Frank cut Gerard off by spinning around and kissing him hard, which was something that he still hadn't fully gotten used to yet even though they'd be doing almost nothing but recently, still - it never failed to amaze him how they fit together so perfectly, how their lips moved instinctually like they were made to be doing this and only this, leaving Frank warm even with the slight chill in the air, his cheeks flushing deeply as Gerard's tongue pushed into his mouth gently when Frank didn't immediately pull away.

That kiss meant everything to Frank, although he was sure he'd say that about the next one, and the one after that, but that was the beauty of what they had, that's why Frank could never give this up, even if it was better for the both of them to go their separate ways, because he needed this, he craved the way Gerard made him feel, the security that came with being wrapped in his arms, the way his problems shriveled up and disappeared any time he so much as looked at Gerard.

Gerard was the best thing in his life, the one person that brought him true, unbridled joy, and Frank let himself sink into the sensations he only experienced around the older man even after Gerard broke the connection of their mouths so he could lead Frank toward the tent, because his tenderness and care for Frank was prevalent even when they weren't kissing in the way his hand gently linked with Frank's, in the way he couldn't seem to keep his eyes off him as they made their way forward, in the way his body was always turned in Frank's direction like he was pulled toward him at all times.

Frank crawled inside of the tent once they had reached the entrance, the thin fabric protecting him from the cold instantly, the space becoming even more inviting when Gerard joined him with a shy smile that had Frank instantly reciprocating the gesture. They sat together quietly for a moment, drinking in the sounds of nature and the presence of the other person next to them, which was something that Frank wasn't able to do often as distracted as they both were, but now nothing else existed besides the two of them, and Frank found himself wishing they could stay this way forever.

"You know I never planned on coming back here again before I met you," Frank admitted without really thinking about what he was saying. It wasn't like he particularly felt the need to break the still air that was surrounding them, but the words had bubbled out of him in an unexpected show of honesty, and now that Frank had started speaking, he didn't feel all that inclined to stop. "It hurt too much, but now it's the complete opposite. I feel safe here, because it reminds me of you and not my father."

"Frankie..." Gerard murmured softly, threading his fingers through Frank's hair as he pulled him against his chest, a pleased hum emitting from Frank as he allowed his muscles to go lax, trusting Gerard to hold him up. "It means a lot to me that I could do that for you. You've been through so much, and I want to help you, to make it better in any way that I can."

"You do Gerard, you make everything better - honestly, and I hope I do the same for you at least in some small way."

"You make everything worth it."

Frank looked up when Gerard remained quiet after his short sentence, noticing the sheen to his irises and the way his hands were trembling slightly where they were pressing on Frank's spine, but Frank didn't need a verbal explanation to understand what was going through Gerard's head. He knew what he was feeling because Frank was sharing in it as well; it was adoration at its strongest, it was having someone care for you when you had given up on ever meaning anything to anyone, it was love, at least on Frank's end, and although Gerard most likely wasn't quite at that point yet, or even if he never was, Frank didn't care, because this was more than he had imagined he would receive in the way of affection, and he was more than content with that.

Frank leaned up then so he could capture Gerard's mouth in his, wanting to distract himself before the thoughts in his head made their way down to his lips, because he couldn't speak them aloud yet, but he could show Gerard how much he loved him with actions at the very least. Gerard kissed back eagerly, also seemingly glad for the excuse not to speak, his shoulders flexing as Frank dug his nails into them, stabilizing himself as hot spikes of desire began to shoot across his nerve endings.

Frank wasn't sure how long they stayed locked in that position kissing almost frantically as if neither of them could get enough, oxygen became irrelevant as long as they could continue in this fashion, their nostrils flaring and their chests burning as they crowded as close to each other as possible, trying to get nearer still even when there was no space between their intertwined bodies.

Eventually, Gerard pushed Frank backward, forcing him to relax against the soft blankets underneath him as Gerard worked his shirt off of him slowly, almost as if he was waiting for Frank to say something, or maybe as if he wasn't sure if he was allowed to view Frank in this way anymore, but he was now.

Frank tried to show him that with his gaze, because in all reality, if Gerard wasn't his teacher, their relationship would be legal now, and Frank didn't want Gerard to go into this with even a hint of guilt twisting at his insides.

Gerard visibly relaxed when Frank put his hand over his, helping Gerard with the last few buttons of his flannel in a physical manifestation of how much he wanted this - wanted him. Frank shrugged the fabric away once they were finished, his body instantly responding to the way Gerard's pupils dilated and his mouth hung open slightly as he stared down at Frank.

"I forgot how gorgeous you are," Gerard muttered, trailing the pads of his fingers over Frank's exposed skin lightly, leaving Frank shivering under his touch even though he was anything but cold. "I missed being able to do this."

"Can I?" Frank asked when Gerard continued to be distracted by Frank's skin, tugging at Gerard's sweater so he would understand what he was asking.

"Yeah," Gerard nodded, letting Frank grasp onto the bottom of his top and lift it over his head, his hair getting mussed in the process, which of course inspired Frank to run his hands through it, using the strands to pull Gerard in for another kiss that only ended when Frank had to throw his head back to gasp for air.

Frank's inhalation turned into a moan when Gerard leaned over him, his body instantly responding to the weight and the pressure just where he needed it most, his cock which was already plump swelling even further when Gerard rocked against it gently. Frank's hips jolted forward on their own accord, his eyes falling shut and his stomach churning with need when Gerard's length rubbed heavily against his own.

"Gerard - please," Frank begged when Gerard began toying with the waistband of his jeans, every small feeling becoming impossibly amplified after going so long without, leaving Frank desperate and aching already even though they had barely started.

"I want to hear you say it, tell me what you want." Gerard's voice emitted so softly that Frank had to strain his ears to catch his words over his audible panting, but once he understood, Frank flushed darkly, his tongue drying up at the worst possible moment. It wasn't as if Frank was shy, not anymore, but it was hard to concentrate on speaking when Gerard was gazing at him steadily with a look that had Frank trembling in anticipation.

"Want you," Frank finally managed to heave out, his cock twitching as Gerard began removing his pants once his words had hit the open air, "want you to fuck me."

"I will, god sugar you don't know how hard it's been to wait for this."

Frank whimpered softly, his lower half lifting upward to help Gerard rid him of his jeans until he was left in nothing besides his boxers, the material tenting forward obnoxiously as Frank did his best to be patient while Gerard removed his own pants.

Gerard leaned over to the left once he was done, digging through a small bag that he must have placed in the corner before returning with a bottle of lube that Frank was so fucking grateful that he'd had the foresight to pack. Frank dug his teeth into his bottom lip as he watched Gerard slick up his fingers, his hand grazing across his length idly, the soft pressure feeling so much better than it should have, leaving Frank gasping quietly when Gerard nodded at him in a way that he knew meant it was all right for him to take off his underwear.

"Fuck," Frank hissed once he properly wrapped a hand around himself, his motions fueled by the way Gerard was gazing at him in a way that could only be described as hungry, his thighs shaking as he spread them wider, exposing himself to Gerard's rapturous stare as he pumped himself slowly.

Gerard continued to watch Frank with an almost dazed expression in his eyes, leaving Frank feeling wanted, adored even, the emotions mixing in along with the lust that was flooding his entire body, leaving him more turned on than he could ever remember being before.

"So beautiful," Gerard gasped when Frank tilted his head back with a groan, his thumb brushing over his slit which was already leaking precome heavily. "Keep doing that, show me how badly you want me."

Frank whined roughly, wishing for Gerard to replace his hand with his own more than anything, but he didn't voice his complaints aloud, he was much too eager to please the other man after all, so he did as he asked, even going so far as to suck a finger into his mouth, licking at the salty digit until it was dripping in saliva before trailing it down his chest, finally reaching the juncture of his legs, stroking over his hole roughly while Gerard moaned in between clenched teeth.

"Please?" Frank pleaded again as he inched the digit inside of himself impatiently when Gerard still remained frozen, his muscles clenching down on the intrusion that he hadn't felt in far too long, "Gerard please?"

Frank was getting desperate now, although he thought he understood why Gerard was making Frank touch himself this way. He assumed that it was helping to remind the other man that Frank wanted that, that this wasn't some illicit tryst, but a partnership with consenting equals no matter what the law said, and Frank was willing to give Gerard that reassurance, but that didn't mean that he wasn't dying for Gerard to take over as well.

"Keep going," Gerard ordered, but he did shift closer to Frank, nudging his way between his splayed out thighs, one of his damp fingers tracing over his entrance as Frank continued to work himself with very little finesse, the awkward angle preventing him from doing much more than brushing against his inner walls, but even the slight drag of that coupled with Gerard's teasing strokes had Frank dizzy and out of breath within minutes.

Finally Gerard pushed one of his slender fingers alongside Frank's, the following burn leaving Frank hissing in surprise since it was rare for fingers to sting so much, but it had been ages since he had been stretched this way, and he found himself enjoying the slight edge of pain as Gerard inched another finger in carefully.

"Shit Gerard - I can't, need you," Frank gasped out when Gerard found his prostate, his hips bucking upward before pushing back down onto Gerard's hand as hard as he could, his eyes watering up at the sweet mixture of pain and pleasure that was threatening to overwhelm him.

"Shh sweetheart, just let me take care of you," Gerard muttered, gently pulling Frank's finger out of the way before replacing it with another of his own, scissoring the digits widely which had Frank crying out loudly, his heels digging into the blankets as he clutched at the base of his cock tightly, trying to contain the pressure there that was already threatening to push its way out of him much too soon. "Do you think you're ready, I don't want to hurt you."

"I am - fuck, I'm going to come if you don't fuck me soon," Frank chuckled weakly, his cheeks tinting red at his admission, but Gerard knew by now how easily he could make him fall apart, and he didn't feel any shame about it, although it was a bit of an inconvenience at times.

"Alright," Gerard groaned lowly before slowly slipping his fingers out of Frank one by one, leaving him whimpering at the empty feeling, his muscles fluttering in protest although he knew what was to come would be even better. "How would you feel about being blindfolded?" Gerard added on, catching Frank off guard with the casual question even though he shouldn't be surprised by anything after hearing about Gerard's kinks. "You can say no, I was just wondering if it would be something you would like."

"I've never thought about it," Frank confessed, taking a deep breath as he weighed the pros and cons of it in his mind, because it sounded interesting, but he also wanted to be able to see Gerard when he pushed into him.

"It will make everything more intense," Gerard continued, "and you can always ask me to take it off if you don't like it."

"Let's try it," Frank nodded, reassured by the fact that he could back out if he changed his mind. He felt safe with Gerard after all, and he was curious what it would be like to be deprived of everything besides the sensation of Gerard's cock inside him, the mere thought of focusing only on such a physical thing leaving him shuddering slightly, which Gerard noticed of course.

"Head up," Gerard grinned, brandishing the item he had used to cover his eyes earlier, which Frank now noticed was one of his ties that he wore at school, which meant that he'd never be able to view the innocent article of clothing in the same way again - fuck, that was going to make class much more interesting.

Frank stretched his neck forward so Gerard could place the fabric around his eyes, letting his lids fall closed as the silky material was wrapped around them. Gerard pressed a series of soft kisses to Frank's cheeks and lips when he was done, ending with a lingering kiss that had Frank chasing after his mouth even once it was obvious that he had retreated once more.

"You're gorgeous Frankie." Gerard's voice resounded louder in Frank's ears than it usually did since he was currently straining to catch onto any sounds that would let him understand what was going on now that he couldn't feel Gerard hovering over him, the compliment twisting around his spine and leaving Frank blushing heavily, his hands reaching out in Gerard's direction only to be stopped by a gentle pressure on his wrist. "No moving okay? Just let me do all the work."

Frank nodded in response, his head feeling heavy as he did his best to relax. A part of him was grateful that he was getting a few minutes to unwind, especially since he had been so close to the edge earlier, but on the other hand, Frank was forever impatient when it came to Gerard, and he had to force himself not to fidget as he heard the sound of the lube bottle being reopened and Gerard's soft sigh which Frank could only assume meant he was touching himself.

"Condom?" Gerard asked, even though Frank thought they had already reached a decision on not using those, but that was before everything had fallen apart, before they had been ripped away from each other all because of Frank's age, before they had decided to try again despite the odds not being in their favor.

The fact that Gerard had thought to check with Frank again touched him, because it was just another way that he was showing that he cared, that he always put Frank first no matter what he wanted, and fuck - Frank would never stop appreciating that.

"No," Frank answered when he realized that Gerard was still waiting on his reply, "just you."

Frank gasped aloud when he felt the blankets shift underneath him followed by Gerard's warm hands on his thighs, spreading him wider as he rubbed his length against Frank's hole, letting Frank know that he was there, that he could still speak up if the blindfold was too much, but Frank didn't want to take it off now, not when everything felt so amazing when he wasn't expecting it, not when it seemed as if he was entirely in Gerard's control.

"Relax sugar," Gerard whispered, and it was only then that Frank realized he was tensing up in anticipation, his body already trying to drag Gerard's cock deeper into him although it was still just pressing against his stretched entrance. "I'm going to make you feel so good."

And true to his word, Gerard pushed in just then, slowly working himself into Frank at a steady past that had Frank moaning loudly, the burn coupled with the heavy weight of Gerard's cock nudging its way inside of him had him choking on his exclamation, because fuck - Gerard was right, this felt so good, better than usual, and even though part of that might be because they hadn't been together in months, Frank reminded himself to ask to be blindfolded more often if it was going to produce more sensations like this.

"Oh god," Frank hissed when Gerard bottomed out, his body struggling to accommodate his size even though Frank actually wasn't feeling that much pain, it was just overwhelming being so full again. He'd forgotten how incredible it was to be connected to Gerard in this fashion, and Frank knew that he would do everything he could to make sure he never lost this privilege again.

"You okay sugar?" Gerard asked, his fingers brushing some of Frank's hair back from his face, the touch surprising him since he couldn't see it, but he still leaned into it hungrily, his hand tracing over Gerard's arm which was taut and strained, the muscles pulled tight thanks to the self-control he was currently imposing on himself.

"Yeah, god -" Frank cut himself off with a choked whine when Gerard moved slightly, nudging his prostate in the process, "so fucking okay."

"Always so tight," Gerard whispered almost to himself as he pulled back out practically all the way, leaving only the head of his cock trapped inside of Frank, "missed this so much."

Frank wanted to respond, to say that he did too, that Gerard felt amazing as always, or something, but Gerard shoved back in just then, ripping a harsh cry out of Frank's lips that he didn't even have time to try and bite back, but it didn't matter here, they were alone for once, making Frank even more grateful for Gerard's choice in their current location.

Frank continued to gasp and whimper as Gerard set up a steady pace, his hands scrabbling against the fabric underneath him until Gerard pinned his wrists down, placing just enough weight on them for Frank to feel trapped in the best way possible, but also like he could pull away if he wanted. The change in angle was better as well, because now with Gerard leaning over him like this, his prostate was being hit constantly, increasing the coiling pressure in Frank's stomach quickly no matter how hard Frank tried to push back his impending orgasm.

Frank found himself becoming lost in the slick drag of Gerard's cock inside of him, in the brilliant bursts of pleasure that wracked his body, in the muttered compliments that fell from Gerard's lips every time Frank clenched around him. Frank was so close already he couldn't even decipher the sounds he was making, or if he was even making any at all, but he could hear Gerard, he could feel him all around him, and Frank had never felt so safe than he did in that moment.

"You're so perfect Frank, absolutely perfect," Gerard's voice cut through the haze of pleasure that was coating Frank's brain, his words slicing into him with a shocking amount of force, and Frank knew that no matter how many times he heard that term, it would never stop being special to him. "I'm so lucky to have you."

"I - fuck," Frank cried, his head thrashing back and forth as his cock swelled and pulsed suddenly, his fragile grip on himself shattering underneath Gerard's sentence and the way Gerard was pushing against the most sensitive spot inside. "I'm gonna come - shit."

Frank's warning almost arrived too late; he was sputtering across his stomach before Gerard could finish wrapping his hand around his length, a drawn out moan coupled with Gerard's name tearing its way out of him as the blackness covering his eyes became tinged with a faint shade of blue at the edges, his body quivering wildly as his cock continued to twitch in Gerard's palm, his orgasm leaving him breathless and exhausted when it finally ended, which seemed to be years after it began.

"Fuck baby, I'll never get tired of seeing you like this, you look so good, I - ahh," Gerard hissed under his breath, his rhythm going sloppy before he shoved into Frank one last time, holding himself there as he coated his insides with his release, causing Frank to gasp quietly at the hot rush, the sensation still pleasurable even though he was oversensitive, and sore, and dazed.

Frank tried to move, to wrap his arms around Gerard before he could pull out, but his muscles had turned to jelly, and it was only when Gerard unwrapped the blindfold from around his face that Frank realized that Gerard had already shifted his position, leaving his hands free even though it didn't do him much good now.

Frank smiled blearily at Gerard since he also seemed to have forgotten how to speak, the grin stretching across his face even when Gerard leaned down and kissed him slowly.

"How did I go so long without that?" Frank mumbled around his thick tongue when Gerard pulled away, his words emerging in an unsteady tone that had Frank flushing once he heard it.

"I was just asking myself the same thing," Gerard giggled as he returned to the bag in the corner, emerging with what looked to be a washcloth which he then used to wipe Frank down with, causing Frank's muscles to quiver underneath his touch, his skin still overly attuned to everything even now that he could see again. "Happy birthday again by the way, I know I've said that probably ten times already, but seriously Frank, I'm so glad I got to share this day with you."

"This has been the best birthday ever," Frank admitted, a yawn breaking up his sentence as Gerard covered him with one of the clean blankets, making sure Frank was comfortable before joining him, a pleased sound rumbling out of his chest when Frank instantly snuggled into his side.

"You deserve so much more, but I'll always try to give you the best of everything."

Frank sighed against Gerard's skin, hating how Gerard always painted himself in such an unflattering light, but right now, he didn't have the energy to argue with him, and he knew that Gerard wasn't being self-deprecating on purpose. Frank would keep showing Gerard how wonderful he truly was, and with time, hopefully he would view himself differently.

Not wanting to breach the sensitive topic at the moment, especially not when Gerard didn't seem truly upset, Frank simply tugged him down for a quick kiss, glorifying in the way he and Gerard shared the same air, and in the way Gerard held him close, because as amazing as the sex had been, these little moments would always be precious as well.

This was when Frank felt the most love for Gerard, this was when he had to bite his tongue to hold that admission back, and maybe one day he would let it emerge from his throat and onto Gerard's ears, but not tonight. For the rest of the evening, he just wanted to lie here with Gerard and enjoy the warmth and adoration he could feel pouring from the other man who was a literal gift all on his own.

Hello lads I'm tired and gay here's a new chapter for you all.

I've been a bit ill lately which means that writing is taking me much longer than it usually does but I'm still doing my best to update everything so thanks for being patient with me.

Votes and comments would be a lovely thing to wake up to if you feel like leaving one.

Love you all xx

Chapter dedicated to itwonthurtto_click

I want to be free as I'll ever be

xo starr