"My dear Hercules," the words of King Eurystheus boomed through the great hall's marble corridors, "you've come back once again. And what a relief to see you've returned...intact."

Hercules swaggered towards the king, the soles of his leather sandals slapping noisily across the floor. In tow was Cerberus, the vicious three-headed watch dog of the Underworld. The beast whimpered quietly as Hercules dragged it along by its serpent tail. Lowering his powerful hips, he flung the monster forward, where it landed with a thud at the foot of the throne. The king recoiled slightly.

"Completely intact, your highness," Hercules pronounced with a grin. "Although I'm not sure I can say the same for Cerberus's pride."

King Eurystheus chuckled uncomfortably.

"Very impressive, Hercules. You continue to astound me." He glanced down at the beast in front of him. "No one has successfully subdued the guard of Hades."

Hercules stretched from side to side. "I actually found the puppy surprisingly good company. And if my math is correct," he paused for a second to count on his fingers, "I believe I've fulfilled my part of the agreement."

For a moment the massive great hall stood silent. Then King Eurystheus stepped down from his throne, careful not to trip over the Cerberus, who was now napping peacefully at his feet.

"Yes, it would seem so..." the king said a bit too nonchalantly. "Well, I have some rather unfortunate news."

Hercules stopped stretching. "Unfortunate news?"

"When you were completing your tenth Labor, retrieving the cattle of Geryon, it is my understanding that one of the prized bulls jumped into the sea?"

"Ah, yes!" Hercules said, still smiling. "One of the bulls did manage to get overboard. But I can testify that he made it safely to shore."

Now it was Eurystheus turn to grin. "The Labor can only be deemed complete if all cattle were safely returned. And you said it yourself a moment ago, you watched one swim successfully to shore."

Hercules scowled. "How about I rip off both your arms and play you like a xylophone you smug little..."

The king stepped back, though still smirking. "Now, now, Hercules, threats will get you nowhere. We both know the deal. You can only be absolved of your crimes only when you complete all the assigned Labors—to my satisfaction, of course."

Hercules inhaled deeply. "So, you have another task for me...your highness?"

"Now that's the spirit!" the king said. He motioned with his hand, and out from a shadowy corner limped forward a frail woman, draped in tattered robes and stinking of incense. The woman grinned wide; she had no teeth...nor tongue.

Hercules eyed the king. "You want me to chaperone your date?"

Eurystheus ignored the quip. "Zola is the enchantress of the realm,"

Zola shuffled around Hercules, chanting inaudibly as she flicked him with droplets of a viscous purple liquid from a vial around her neck.

The king stood in front of him. "Your thirteenth and final Labor is..."

"—a shower?" Hercules interrupted.

"—unlike any other obstacle you've faced before," stated the king, through gritted teeth.

The enchantress pricked Hercules's arm with a long, sharply-filed fingernail. A dribble of blood trickled down the slope of his bicep. He glanced at it.

"I vanquished the Nemean Lion, surely I can survive a scratch from the old hag."

Using the same nail, she scooped a drop of blood and slid it into the vial.

"Have you ever traveled through time, Hercules?" the king asked.

Hercules felt a tingling sensation spread outward from his chest to the tips of his fingers.

"What is this sorcery?"

"It's all preparation for your last Labor. I have decided you will aid my descendants—in the future."

"The future?" Hercules could barely utter the words.

The king leaned in closer. "The enchantress tells me that my lineage has thrived beyond the centuries. But apparently one of my far-flung offspring is in need of assistance."

Hercules glanced down and saw the marble floors of the great hall begin to swirl. His vision grew spotty as everything glowed beneath him.

"What do I have to do?" Hercules gasped.

"Simple," King Eurystheus said with a grin, "help my flesh and blood."

"And how will I know when my task is complete." Hercules vision faded in and out.

"Oh, don't worry. You'll know."

The enchantress gave one last joyful squawk as she uttered the final line of her spell. Then everything went black.

When Hercules regained consciousness, he found himself lying in a patch of spongy green grass in front of a modest two-storied home. The windows were wider and fitted with glass, and the front portico seemed a bit smaller, but otherwise the building was similar to those of Greece. He turned his head and noticed dozens of these charming dwellings lining a road of stone. The sun winked at him through a thin blanket of clouds. Quite an upgrade from the smog of the Underworld.

Through the front door, a young woman emerged. She looked to be not much older than Hercules himself. He stood up, brushing the grass and dust from his armor and lion pelt.

She looked in his direction.

"Oh my god!"

Hercules smiled; she did recognize him.

"Thank you so much for coming! I know it's short notice, but the hospital called late last night and told me I need to work a double. I promise I'll be back tonight, no later than ten."

"It is my pleasure, fair maiden," Hercules said with a bow.

The woman blushed. "Well aren't you sweet." She glanced at her watch. "Shoot, already running behind. Let me introduce you to the kids really quick."

She walked back inside and Hercules heard her shout. When the woman reemerged, four little children trailed behind her.

"Okay, really quick," she pointed to one of the kids. "From left to right: Cory, Kayla, Holli, and Al. Cory is the oldest; he's eight, Al is the youngest; he's four. Kayla and Holli fall somewhere in between." She gave each one a quick kiss on the forehead and ran to her car, shouting instructions as she went.

"There's food in the fridge. Cory likes tuna fish, Kayla and Holli want mac and cheese; Al won't eat anything unless it's shaped like a dog. Have fun!"

And with that, she sped away in a metal horseless chariot faster than Pegasus. Hercules stared at the children. They stared back.

Cory pointed at him. "Why are you dressed like that?"

"I defeated the Nemean Lion and took his pelt to celebrate my victory."

Holli wrinkled her nose. "It smells bad. You smell bad."

"Yeah," Kayla squeaked, "you smell like doody."

Hercules frowned.

"We want to play," they all said in chorus.

Al rushed forward. "Throw me; throw me!"

Hercules shrugged and picked the little bugger up. His siblings watched as their younger brother soared into the sky. After what felt like a full minute, Al landed safely and securely back into Hercules's arms.

Wide-eyed, Al looked up at Hercules. "Again! Again!"

Al's three siblings ran up to Hercules. "Me next!" they all shouted.

Hercules spent the next hour tossing the kids up into the clouds. He wiped a dribble of sweat from his forehead. "How about we take a break?"

"We're hungry," the kids said in harmony, as they led Hercules inside the house and into the kitchen.

He looked around. He saw no fish. Or cheese. Or dog. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a bunch of tomatoes. He tossed one to Cory. "There. A juicy tomato."

Cory made a face. "Gross."

"Mac and cheese, please," Kayla sang.

"I don't see any cheese."

"It's in a box," Holli said.

"What?"

"You mix the powder with milk."

What is this sorcery, Hercules thought to himself. From another room, he heard screaming. Al limped into the kitchen; his knee covered in blood. He wailed. "It hurts!"

"We're hungry," the others moaned.

Hercules felt himself getting flustered. He had survived ear-splitting shrieks of sirens, but that all sounded like a lullaby compared to this choir of terror. For the next four hours, he chased the kids around the house, tending to tears, searching for missing puzzle pieces, burning macaroni, wiping buggers, settling quarrels, fixing bike chain, sweeping cereal, and serving as both the evil step mother and pumpkin carriage in the kid's rendition of Cinderella.

After another few hours of chaos, Hercules heard the doorbell ring. He tip-toed quietly through the living room, careful not to disturb any of the sleeping children splayed out across the thick, fuzzy carpeting.

He opened the door.

"Sorry I'm a little late," she apologized. "How were they?"

"Bundles of joy," Hercules whispered back, smiling.

"Same time tomorrow?" she asked. "I have to work another double."

Hercules considered the question for a moment. "Yes, same time tomorrow." He gave one more glance towards the living room before stepping out into the cool spring night.