Wu ChenGuang was not a jealous person. Well that's what she had been telling herself now for what felt like forever. Okay so forever might have just been a couple of days or you know the last week. 

She had never known herself to get jealous before, not when she saw the other people in her gymnastic group get more medals than her. Not when she looked at the line distribution and saw what the other members got in comparison. Not when she noticed other people out on the streets with their partner and she was alone doing the shopping for herself and the other 13 members. 

That was until now. And she hated this feeling. Hated it so much that she was crying over it. Yep she had retreated away from the others into her room and was crying. Crying over her feelings and the situation. It was dramatic yes as she lied on her bed and stared at the ceiling with tears running down her face. But she couldn't bare to see him right now. In actual fear that her feelings would jump out. 

She'd never been more confused in her life. She thought she was cemented in her relationship with Seungcheol. She thought she knew where they stood. Cause she was damn certain he had her whole heart. Was she dumb to think the same thing. Up until now she had no reason to question this thought nothing had suggested anything differently. 

Well that was until they had gotten a new member of staff just over a week ago. The new member of staff was a very very pretty woman who must have been around the same age as her self. She had very pretty dark brown hair styled in large waves and big beautiful dark eyes. She looked very different to Chenguang at the time who's hair had been dyed ginger in colour and had very slim eyes. The new staff member was lovely she was a truly nice person who didn't treat any member better than another. And she was pretty talented at makeup as well. 

And Chenguang would never had minded this new addition to their staff team. She had always gotten on well with them and enjoyed having people who stayed around enough to be on first name bases with her and have proper meaningful conversations. And it was no fault of the new staff member but like it was the way she had gained the attention of the ever polite leader. How she had made him act in  a way she had only ever seen him act with herself. The new staff member was named Jihye and she had brought out the side Chenguang thought was only for her.

And this was not okay. She didn't like the way Seungcheol looked and smiled at her and the way he spoke to her. 

Chenguang hadn't even thought she was jealous at first. She had thought maybe that she was coming down with something and this was making her feel slightly off, slightly funny. Until she had called Wendy and asked her for help. The pair had sat on the phone for over two hours talking about the younger girls feelings and what was going on. It wasn't until it was pointed out that she was aware this awful feeling was jealousy and she wanted it to go so bad. Wendy had told her to just go and talk it out. To bring it up and just share her feelings with said man. It couldn't truly be that bad, because according to Wendy, there was nothing purer than the love the two parents of seventeen held for one another. 

And this brought her back to now. Sitting on her bed unsure of what to do with herself. Unsure on how to deal with said feelings and attributes. She was very much confused in the current moment. But she was determined to move on and put her thoughts to something else. 

She knew the perfect way to take her thoughts of her situation. She would start a v-live with her fans. Taking off any prior makeup she had on and washing her face she decided she would do a v-live with the carats and do her makeup whilst answering their questions. 

Setting up the recording device she clicked the starting button and watched as fans joined the streaming service. 

"Hello carats, it's time for Dami's drama. And no I'm not going to be just sharing the top secrets of my children but don't think some won't slip out. No I'm going to be doing my makeup. But I won't start until I reach 1000 hearts so that as many of you as possible can see the whole routine." 

Very soon afterwards she started with the whole live going extremely well. She answered a whole variety of questions as she continued the look, incorporating ideas and colours of which they asked her to use whilst she was at it. She had soon finished the look but was still answering questions which the fans had directed at the female idol. A lot of which was something they would ask a female only. Though her face paled when she read the next question of which many fans had asked to that point.

'How do I tell my crush how I feel' She read the comment aloud before taking a moment to process how she was going to answer the question. 

"I mean I would always say do it in a way that makes you comfortable. Everyone has something they do as a creative outlet, something which calms them and makes them happy. For some people its music, for others its writing. And then use that to your advantage. Use that as a method to help you confess because the more comfortable you are in the moment the more likely you are to get what you want to say across in the manner you want to." 

"Be confident in yourself. You are all amazing people and those you are trying to tell how you feel, will know that as much as I do if not even more. These people if they are worthy of your love, your feelings probably reciprocate those feelings for you."

"When in doubt, just go ahead and say it. Just let them know how they feel. Don't sit there and contemplate on your feelings. Don't overthink them and don't worry about them. It's better to get it off your chest than to bottle it away. Nothing good ever comes from hiding your feelings for that person it only makes it worse for you. For your heart." She continued her lecture as a response to the question. Her mind whirling over the fact that she too should probably think about taking her own advice but at that moment of time pushed it to the back of her mind. 

'It sounds like you have experience with this' Was the next comment she read. 

"Yeah I have experience with it. Here I am telling you how to do it and giving some pretty decent advice. Advice of which I am yet to take myself. But maybe. Just maybe speaking it out with you all will make me want to do it myself. " She answered before the topic moved on and eventually the v-live ended. 

Five days had passed since Chenguang had given basically herself the advice she needed. And in those five days her feelings had only increased. She found herself thinking of him even more and every time she thought of him no matter how well her thoughts started it always slipped. Slipped into the thoughts of how he could like another girl. Someone who was not her and it broke her heart. Each and every damn time. 

That was why she had almost retreated into herself. She had tried to sort out the inner termoil she was facing without having to come face to face with the others. She had barely spoken to them in the last couple of days scared that as soon as she spoke to them in great depths it would all come pouring out. And no matter how much she loved her members she could just not put herself through having to explain it to them and know that it could easily be passed on in the way she didn't want it. So instead she had turned to some of the few female idols she trusted.

And that was how she was out right now with Irene and Wendy. And by out, they had snuck her into the SM entertainment building and were currently messing around in the practice room just talking through everything and anything they could. That was before they had brought up the fatal conversation topic. 

"Chen-Chen, have you thought more about telling Coups your feelings?" Came the voice of Irene as she looked at the younger girl.

"A little, like I'm coming to terms with these feelings I really am." She confessed watching as the two older woman squealed with delight. 

"AND" They egged

"I've... I've been in love with him for what feels like forever. I think about him all the damn time. He's the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing before I go to bed. I'm constantly worried he's overworking himself and isn't getting enough rest. That... that one of these days he's going to find someone. Someone better than me, someone he- he" she trailed off at the end looking down at her hands rather than at her two close friends. She let out a sigh before laying back onto the ground. 

"You've got it bad Chen-Chen" Came the voice of Irene which only received a vocal sound agreement from the younger girl. 

"You need to let him know and I have the perfect idea." Wendy pitched in watching as the youngest girl let out another sigh and pulled an arm over her face. 

"Sing for him Chen-Chen. I know you've probably already got a song planned but like sing for him. We can record it and put it on v-live now. Like record us just messing around and like fit it in somehow." Suggested Irene before Wendy was already agreeing to it and the v-live had been started. The two girls had Chenguang sign in with the Seventeen account before they started and purposefully started the v-live just recording her laid on the floor.

"Hello carats, its Irene and Wendy from Red Velvet and today we've kidnapped the ever so amazing Dami and taken her to our training room." Started Irene as she zoomed in on the figure of ChenGuang on the floor. 

"I believe her love has gotten her down." Teased Wendy as she poked the younger girl in the ribs. This was reacted with a groan and ChenGuang bringing her other arm up to cover the rest of her face. 

"Come on you Chinese beauty. We all know exactly what will cheer you up. You've got to get these feelings out. And the best way is through song. Don't think we haven't heard you hum the same song all day. Just sing it aloud for the world" Wendy continued to badger watching as the younger girl stayed still but did in fact open her mouth to start singing. 

This song is 'To love you more' sung originally by Céline Dion

I'll be waiting for you
Here inside my heart
I'm the one who wants to love you more
You will see I can give you
Everything you need
Let me be the one to love you moreSee me as if you never knew
Hold me so you can't let go
Just believe in me
I will make you see
All the things that your heart needs to know

And the girls were actually correct. She did feel better after singing and happily continued the v-live with the other two as they continued to mess around in the training room. But she had no clue what was going on in the dorms.

She had no knowledge that two of the members closest to her were currently having a meeting in one of the bedrooms moments before the live had started and had continued it during its's duration. 

Joshua and SeungCheol had gathered in Joshua's empty bedroom about half an hour before the v-live had started. Both aware of the changes they had been witnessing in the only female member of the group. The changes in the female idol which left them uncomfortable. 

"Josh, please please tell me I'm not the only one who's noticed Aly hasn't been acting the same these last couple of days." Seungcheol started a genuine concern for her evident in her voice.

"No, you're not there's something going on. She's almost distanced herself from us for the last couple of days. She'll spend time with us but it doesn't actually feel like she's there. It feels as though theres a ghost of her there and the actual her is somewhere else." Joshua elaborated both young men looking at each other with the same look. A look of confusion. 

"Nothing happened between you two?" Questioned Joshua

"Why do you ask?"

"The only person I could ever think Aly would get hung up on is you. You two have this bond. A bond I've only ever seen like my parents have. I don't know how to explain it but the only thing I can ever seen affecting her so much would be a strain on your bond. Something, something tiny could have done it." Joshua reasoned watching as the leader and his close friend looked deep in consideration. 

"I... I can't think of anything thats happened. I just know she won't spend a prolonged period of time in the same room as me. I mean she wouldn't even let me help her cook last night and we always cook together. It's one of those times it's just us and I get to spent time with her without the kids." Coups explained running a hand through his hair. 

"Can you remember what happened on the last day that she was acting okay with us all?" Joshua continued to question. 

"I remember we had a performance and the last time she seemed okay was when we were getting our hair and makeup done. I was talking to Jihye and then ever since she has been funny." Seungcheol spoke and it clicked for Joshua. He knew what the still clueless other man had yet to work out. 

And as he contemplated how he was going to suggest to his friend what the situation meant the v-live notification ringed. He quickly looked to see it was their account which was going live. 

"What are the other lads doing?" He questioned

"Most of them are just lazing about on our hours off. I don't think any of them planned to have a v-live today." Seungcheol elaborated as they clicked on the notification and watched as two members of red velvet appeared on their screen. 

Soon enough they spotted the exact person they had been talking about only moments prior. She laid on the floor her face covered by her arm and Joshua turned to study the leader in this moment. How his eyes were focused on the female member and how he let out a small sigh.

"She's so beautiful why does she hide her face?" Came the voice of his friend as they both watched as their female member sung on the live. Joshua had keyed into the meaning behind the song but Seungcheol was a clueless as he had ever been rather focusing on the sounds of her voice rather than trying to translate and understand the song. 

"Sungcheol, you do realise what this song is about?" Joshua spoke trying to encourage him to think.

"No."

"It's about her feelings. Aly... Aly mate she's scared. Scared she's going to lose you to another girl. She's convinced she's already lost you-" Joshua spoke but before he could finish his explanation he watched as the leader swiftly stood and walked at a quick pace out of the room.

Following his friend out of the room he watched him quickly pull on his coat and pick up the car keys. Seungcheol fished his phone out of his pocket and clicked on the contact of one of the two red velvet members. Listening to it ring he smiled when it was picked up on the second ring. 

"Keep ChenGuang where she is. I'm coming to you. Someone better let me in when I get there." He rushed out running to the door to pull on his shoes.

Joshua followed the leader shouting a "Go and get your girl" as the leader rushed out the door letting it slam shut behind him. 

The journey which normally took only 15 minutes felt like an eternity for SeungCheol. But when he had parked out the front of the building and raced to the front door he was met with the grinning face of Wendy. Well it was more of one of those looks someone would give when their plan has worked out. 

"I'm going to take you to where she is and then me and Irene are going to stand outside to give you some space." 

The two quickly made it to the practice room with the male complaining the whole way about how the lift was taking too long and how the corridors were too long. Wendy's original plan was for them both to enter and then her and Irene would go to stand outside the door. But that plan was scrapped in seconds.

The male had stormed his way into the practice room and straight over to his missing female member. He had taken her face in his hands and placed a rather hard kiss to her lips. Chenguang had not even taken a moment to think about it before she was responding to it. The pair now in their own world as the red velvet members watched on, though the other two were oblivious to their presence. 

The two SM idols soon went to stand outside the room as the 'couple' soon broke off their kiss. 

"Wu Chenguang, don't you ever think I can replace you. Don't ever think there's someone out there for me who isn't you. Because you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You have my entire heart and you'll always have my heart. No-one else will ever have it. It's yours now and forever"

Well hello. Long time no story for Chenguang and I'm sorry uni has been a little hetic and I've been struggling to come to terms with the way of which I want to put down my ideas. I hope the 3000 words for this request is enough to appolgise the lack of love this story has received recently. I would start an updating schedule but I can't even keep to that most of the time.

So thank you all for reading and I hope if you'd like to see more for any of my books you'll leave a comment somewhere. Or message me please. 

Kind regards

WINNIE