"I have nowhere to go"

"Roshini, wait! You forgot one thing," Siddharth said to her when she hurriedly walked; stopping in the midway to the entrance of their house she raised her gaze to him.

"What?" she asked gazing his half-naked body, his perfect figure, it has been a month since they started this passionate irresistible relationship. Roshini in these days felt the true happiness of her life. Siddharth was just creating each day special by doing something that will make her smile and blush for the entire day. Each moment she was excited to know what he will do after that, that eagerness has made her fall crazily in love with him, she couldn't pass a single moment without thinking about Siddharth. If she did then it will be only in her deep sleep.

What kind of love is this? She questioned feeling her dripping love that wasn't keeping her normal at all. He is making her feel special like she got all the happiness in this entire world.

"Come here," he commanded and smiling Roshini went near to him, she is wearing a saree since today in her office they asked everyone to come in an ethnic way so she wore a Red saree and tempting Siddharth from the morning. He disturbed her a lot when she was draping this but what he is going to do now was her question.

"What I forgot?"

"Come closer I will tell you," he replied. Today Siddharth was off to work and going to a meeting in the afternoon so now he is standing to send off Roshini. Pulling her waist all of a sudden. He kissed her lips.

"I will come in the evening to pick you from the office," he said.

"Hmm okay," she replied and pushed him closer so that she can kiss his cheeks.

"I will come very soon..." he whispered. She nodded.

"Let me go," she said when he was still hugging her.

"Don't go," he whined.

"I will be back soon," she convinced.

"Then give me something with your love until you come back," he winked.

Roshini kissed his lips fervently and soon it turned her so hot. "Please sweetheart I have to go," she took his hands off from her waist and walked.

"Don't forget to have breakfast," telling that she put her slippers and walked to the car. Waving her hand she went inside the car, Siddharth telling ta-ta headed inside the house.

During the ride, Roshini blushed thinking about yesterday how Siddharth surprised her. After she came back from work yesterday Roshini took some rest until Siddharth to come back, when she again woke up he isn't home yet. In a confusion, she called him again and again but he wasn't picking the phone too. She thought he must be at work and went to prepare dinner for both of them. When she was busy doing that... Suddenly someone from behind hugged her, the person closed her mouth and avoided her shocking screams. Roshini was hell scared and wiggled to get away from the grip.

He dragged her to the bedroom, "Tonight I am going to kill you with my love," the person said in an intimidating way wandering his hand on her body.

Wait! This must be... Siddharth! She screamed.

"A very late identification," he laughed.

"I am scared," she cried and went out of the room.

He followed her and Roshini turned off the stove and looked at him. "What? Are you angry?"

"Yeah," she glared.

He hugged her in sideways and kissed her cheeks, "Really?"

"Yeah," she slurred.

He nibbled her earlobe and Roshini felt a sweet sensation running across her body. "Still angry," he seductively whispered.

She didn't reply because he changed her state of mind at a split second, "Answer me Rosh?" he again mumbled.

"No, leave me," she at last surrendered.

Grinning Siddharth hugged her tightly. "Life is so beautiful when I spend my time with you," he softly said and Roshini drew out from the hug and kissed all over his face. Reminding that now she felt a strange feeling in her stomach, it is alluring to spend each second with Siddharth.

When she reached her office she walked in carrying a big smile. Till now Siddharth didn't ask her to resign the job or any other things regarding her profession but she is afraid whether he will do that after their marriage because she doesn't want to waste her education at any cost.

Tomorrow she is going home after one month for the Diwali and she is too excited to see Nidhi's baby girl. Just two days before the baby born and Roshini was so happy to know that, she literally cried in happiness. Siddharth was traveling along with her.

Today there are few important works for Roshini that she have complete it by tomorrow that's why she came here or else she would have taken leave to stay with Siddharth. After doing that till afternoon she went to have lunch with her colleagues. In their talk, they were discussed about marriage and all. In that one person started talking about live in relationship and told her dislike in that kind of stuff. Roshini became so sad to hear that... then open person opened a story about her distance relative girl who was in this kind of relationship with the guy she loves, but later that guy left her telling this won't work out between them. Then that girl tried to commit suicide but thankfully she was saved by her parents and now trying to live without him.

Hearing this story Roshini eyes widened in shock, she had a thought like what she will do if this happens to her. For a moment she thought whether she took a wrong decision by giving herself to him.

Later that day she was constantly thinking about this only, When Roshini work got finished in the office she came out only to see her driver waiting for her.

"Where is he?" She asked.

"Sir was still in that meeting so he asked me to drop you in the house," he replied.

She nodded and headed to the house. How much she tries to throw that thought away she again and again repeated in her mind.

She started questioning why Siddharth asked for this five months gap when he was so much in love with her... But she is afraid that she shouldn't be asking this to him because this small doubt will bring a havoc in their pleasant relationship.

When she reached home she dropped her bag on the counter and drank a glass of water, she came out and laid on the couch, waited for Siddharth.

...

"Rosh," Roshini woke from her nap when she heard Siddharth's voice.

Opening her eyes she saw Siddharth beside her and he smelled.... alcohol. Roshini first thought it must be his perfume but sniffing him closely she indeed found that he is drunk. She immediately got up and found that she is on their bed.

"You are drunk?" she asked.

"After meeting we had some drinks, sorry," his speech garbled and Roshini couldn't believe is this a small thing to keep mum. No, if I didn't ask then he will continue doing it.

"But it is not a good thing right," she started.

"I know what can I do? I am sorry," he again apologized and turned to the other side to sleep.

"Have you ate anything?" she questioned rocking his shoulders.

"Yeah I had, and I bought food for you too," he mumbled and started sleeping.

What else Roshini can do then, she came out of her room changing her saree. She had her food thinking about so many things. When did he start to have this kind of habit? She thought and felt nervous.

After watching TV to distract her mind, she came back to bed at 11.pm. Siddharth was sleeping peacefully and snoring too. She laid beside him and watched him for some time leaving a space between them, then eventually she hugged him as tight as she could like she has only him to rely on this entire world.

She understood in that few minutes where she was gazing at him she felt so lonely, sad and bitter, but when the moment she hugged him those feelings are faded away. In this life, she can never think about leaving him, or Siddharth leaving her if that happens then she can't live at all,

I have nowhere to go Siddharth please don't dishearten me. I love you... she cried to him but he wasn't hearing at all and sleeping unaware of Roshini's emotional battle.

Next morning Siddharth opened his eyes to see Roshini sleeping in his arms. He securely gathered her fully on his embrace and smiled feeling her breathe on his neck. Suddenly he reminded about yesterday events, Oh shit, he cursed himself and looked Roshini.

She must have scared to see me in that way right, he thought. Yesterday he signed a big deal with a French company in a luxurious hotel, after that the representatives of that company had drinks and obligated him to drink along with them, as table manners he had a little but the licker was very strong in concentration that turned him drowsy in two glasses. So that he couldn't drive.

He did remember about coming home and carrying Roshini to the bed but after that, he couldn't remember what happened. In a confusion, he got up from the bed and the disturbance made Roshini wake from her sleep too. She didn't smile like usual and closed her eyes again.

"I am going to take bath, do you want to join me," he asked caressing her shoulder.

"No," she told without looking at him.

Siddharth doubted that she is angry with him so he didn't speak anything and headed to the restroom. He thought about how to convince Roshini and came out to find her on the kitchen preparing tea. Changing his clothes he went to her.

"Rosh," he called out her name but she didn't look at him. He knows he is the one who did the mistake so he decided to apologize.

"About yesterday I am sorry Roshini, I drink only at occasionally times, I won't do this again, please..." he apologized.

Roshini giving the cup, "Don't do this again," she told and walked out.

But he wasn't convinced by her answer, "Rosh I apologized right, don't keep that face,"

"Then what I have to do?" Roshini glared.

"I am confused to see you, this relationship. It may be an enjoyment for you but not for me. I am not used to this kind of lifestyle. Why I have to wait for five months to marry you? Whether this time period is to know whether I will be suitable for you?" she blurted out her thoughts cause keeping it inside won't give the answer that she needs.

Siddharth face changed hearing this, "So are you thinking that I am using you?" he asked straightly.

"No... but. I," before she could explain her stopped her.

"I understood," he is pissed off and that's evident from his expression.

Roshini didn't talk with him and stared him going inside their room. She had the tea. She was in the mindset that she did nothing wrong here... for how many days she can hide her actual feelings. But she feared how Siddharth will take this as?

The maid came at 9 pm and Roshini helped her in cooking and talked about some random stuff with her. Siddharth went out having breakfast and haven't been home yet. In a few hours, they were going home. Roshini started feeling that she did the wrong thing by fighting with him at this time.

Siddharth came back home and had the lunch, he didn't talk with her and behaved like how she did. Questioning his love has really made him get angry at her.

Later that day Roshini started packing her bag and also packed his bag, she initiated the conversation by asking what the things he needed.

He simply replied, "I will pack mine." That's all she totally immersed in the pool of regret.

He didn't speak anything until he came out and told, "Let's leave."

Roshini nodded and followed him to the car. The driver dropped them in the airport. After checkings, they seated on the plane. Putting a headphone on his ears Siddharth closed his eyes.

Roshini typed a message to him stating I AM SORRY. When he got the notification he saw it and Roshini but he didn't reply and again closed his eyes. Seeing this she totally scared. But she can't again start an argument in this plane so she remained silent.

When they reached Coimbatore Siddharth picking up their bags headed outside, where his dad's driver was waiting for him. He asked him to drop Roshini first. Throughout the ride they were silent. Siddharth face was stern and kind of angry too.

Getting down from the car Roshini looked him, "I am sorry," she said.

"Go now, I will talk with you later," he replied and asked his driver to go.

Looking at him leaving her made Roshini's eyes to well in tears. She thought he will understand her but after all, he is a human, he has feelings, he will get hurt too when she question his love.

I did a mistake! Understanding this she walked to her house in a deep guilt.