Here it is another chapter.

***************

Catherine stares at Jeremy. 

"Let's stop it right here. Let's stop all this nonsense and think about the baby only" Catherine's eyes widened hearing those words. When he said those words coldly. She shake her head smiling painfully at him, " No"

" I have already destroyed your life" a tear rolled down her cheeks.

"I don't want to make it impossible for you to find love, Jeremy" Jeremy's eyes widened. The way she is talking is totally different.

"Trust me, I never wanted to shatter your belief" She whispered.

"Because I have given up on my happiness to keep your beliefs once" Catherine said those words painfully aware of her situation.

"What are you saying?" Jeremy asked her coldly. He does not want to hear bullshit. No, he will take responsibility for the child. 

"All my life I was under a controlling mother. I was not supposed to make a decision, if I did someone will always suffer. You are one of my decisions Jeremy, which my mother did not like. It's not like I can't go against my mother. If I was gone with my decision you would have suffered. I did what I thought was right at the time and here I am" Catherine smiled painfully.

"But I love you too much to see you being shattered. I can't let your life crumble because of me because of my selfishness" She turned to him. His breath hitch something is off about her but he doesn't want to care.

Who was he kidding? He does, he does care about her more than himself Jeremy shook his head.

"What the hell are you saying?" He grabbed her shoulder forcing her to look at him.

"I am sorry that you have fallen in love with me" Catherine touched his cheeks.

"Shut up" Jeremy ordered her as a tear fell from his eyes. She shakes her head. 

"I am at fault. I know you were drunk. I know you were vulnerable but when I kissed you.I cannot stop myself. It was our first kiss" Catherine smiled. 

"I was happy and when you wrapped your arms around me, my heart fluttered. I know what I was doing was wrong. I am cheating on someone but I let myself be happy for once" Jeremy stared at her.

"For once I wanted to be in your arms. Be with you like a woman. I hated it when you kissed Salina. We never once kissed like that.In high school when we started dating you never kissed me, you always told me that when I will initiate the kiss you will kiss me back, You used to tease me for that. I know I was being childish but I can't help myself" a tear fell from her eyes. His eyes widened, shocked he would not even describe how he was feeling.

"I never intended for you to find out about this"  Catherine shook her head. She never wanted him to see how ugly her jealousy is.

"I would have told him that I am shameless and I  cheated on him if I get the chance. I was ready for all those disgusting looks and hatred. But I did not get any chance" Jeremy did not say anything and let her continue.

"I never wanted you to know either. It was supposed to be my secret" Catherine touched her stomach.

"But when Coltrane asked I feel like he should know and that something happened with your mother, I could not bring myself to lie to her" Catherine sighed sadly.

"If I lied to her, I would have felt guilty that I lied to the woman who gave her whole life to bring you up" She looked down.

"I did not know this would have ended up in a disaster. Not only that I never intended to marry Coltrane or anyone else. But what I did to Coltrane was wrong and I feel guilty" Catherine said. 

"All I ever wanted was you to be my first and my last" She blinked her tears away. Jeremy clenches his teeth and turns her to him. She is hiding something again. Her hand touched his cheek. She moved forward softly pressing her lips on his. He stilled his hold on her shoulder slacked.

"I will let you go," Catherine smiled painfully. 

"You can't" Jeremy stopped his emotions from showing. Nothing not anger or sadness. He was being the same Jeremy which people avoid at any cost. How does he actually feel about her confession? He does not know.

Does he want to know? He doesn't know, nor does he have time. He is not sure whether to believe her or not either. 

"Why?" Catherine whispered. Her hand fell to her side as she was hopeful. Yes she was.

"Because you married me. And you claimed that you are carrying my baby. I married you solely based on that for my mother" Jeremy stated all those as a fact. She looked down hurt at his words.

Jermey cupped her cheeks forcing her to look at him, " I don't know what I want from this relationship. But Indo knew one thing quite clearly, Catherine, that I wanted this baby to be delivered safely. Carry this child safely and deliver it. Do you understand me? If and by any chance if anything happened to him or her. I will never forgive you  Catherine, neither will I forgive myself" Jeremy bent down facing her.

"Do you understand?" He asked coldly. She nods her head and tears fall freely. He then bent forward and kissed her forehead, she froze struggling to push him. He let her go.

"There is another thing Catherine, I did not believe any of the words you said? And it's not like you have given me any reason to believe you" Jeremy said.

Catherine looked at him, her face filled with hurt. He not only feels colder but cruel too.

"But I am giving you. Your rights as my wife. Feel happy, love" Catherine looked at him in shock.

"Jeremy??" She stared at him confused at his words.He suddenly pulled her on his lap.

Knock knock

"Come in," her eyes widened. James entered his office. He almost dropped the glass of milk when he saw his boss sitting on the couch with her. She tried to stand but his hand went around her holding her in place. She turned red. 

"Put it on the table and send cleaners after office hours. Now get out" Jeremy ordered John. And John did what he was asked off without looking at them.

When he said his wife,  she should feel happy but her heart breaks and he is treating her more coldly than before. And when he held her in his lap she felt humiliated. Tears filled her eyes.

"Why are you always crying? It's annoying you know" Jeremy told her coldly. She looked at him and her eyes widened.

"Relax" He said relaxing on the couch. Catherine shakes her head. He wiped her tears only to feel pain when her salty tears touched his finger. She almost forgot how injured his hand is. She tried to hold his hand but he snatched it away.

"I am fine," Jeremy said, then let her go. Catherine settled down beside him. 

"Drink it" He handed her warm milk. She looked at him then drank it silently.

Jeremy looked away.  She stared at his bloodied hand as she finished her milk. Catherine put down the glass and slowly reached for his hand. He instantly snatched away, "What?" 

Catherine looked down for a while before grabbing his hand. He hissed.

"Please treat it" She softly touched his hand. This time he did not react.

"I am fine," Jeremy told her coldly. She flinched then grabbed his hand tightly. He hissed glaring at her.

"You are not," Catherine mumbled. He sighed.

"You want me to treat it?" Jeremy said rather than asking.

"Yes" Catherine nodded her head.

"Then let's go" with that he walked out of his office room with her following behind.

"Send me all those documents via mail. I will check it and handle the meeting" He ordered James before getting out of the company. James  nods his head obediently before doing his job.

******

"I am giving you a warning"  Ronald sighed looking away. He knew how much Cassandra loved Coltrane or still does. Saying something like this to her is cruel but he needs to tell her. This time he did not smile no he cannot smile at the distorted female. 

"Stay away from him" Cassandra stared at him before shaking her head. 

"Why should I?" She asked not that she should but she did. 

"He depends on you emotionally, Cassandra.Why? I don't know but he does" 

"Being attached to someone emotionally who herself suffered from emotional trauma. Do you think it's good?" Ronald asked her, his eyes softened. When she looked at him, she felt hurt. 

"Are you saying I am bad for him?" Cassandra looked down chuckling. 

"No, he is bad for you" 

"He is feeding off of your emotions, Cassandra. But when this will transform into obsession you won't know" Ronald sighed the way Coltrane reacted when he asked her for coffee he felt something is off. Coltrane seems almost possessive of her.

"How can you say something like that? Him obsessing over me" Cassandra shook her head. 

"Isn't it the other way around?" She chuckled at the irony of his words.

"Why was he getting annoyed when I asked you for coffee?" Ronald asked. 

Cassandra blinked her eyes, getting annoyed by that so for her. Is he mocking her? She choked on her breath. 

"He is having difficulty in believing people?" She takes a deep breath. 

"Why is that?" 

"Because his fiance left him" Cassandra sighed. 

"Yes and who you are?" 

"Her... Her replacement" She gulped down painfully. Ronald looked away, "I am sorry. I.." 

"No continue" 

"As I was saying he has no right to put his input or any discomfort when it comes to you" Ronald told her. 

" He might be insecure," she whispered. 

"For what?" 

" for losing...me" Cassandra looked down. What was she saying? Losing her. He would not even miss her if she goes away and never comes back. 5 years was enough to prove it.

"No for losing her replacement" She rectified herself,  blinking shocked at this revelation. 

Cassandra stayed silent. She did not know what she was feeling but hurt was the top most among them. 

"Do you actually want that kind of relationship?" Tears filled her eyes as she crouched down. She had given up everything, everything in her life and loved him unconditionally but only for being a replacement. Casandra knows that from the beginning but saying that out loud actually makes it more real and more suffocating. She felt a warm hand which wrapped around her. She buried her head on his chest and sobbed as he rubbed her back. 

"I am not saying this to break your heart" Ronald whispered. 

She pushed him away, "I already know. It's fine" 

"I am fine" She gulped down painfully.

"It's already broken . I don't think it can be broken anymore," Cassandra looked down. 

"Why don't you try to move on?" She smiled at him painfully. 

"You know I never wanted to ask this and waited for you to tell me but you never did" Ronald said and waited for her to react but she remained silent. 

"When you came under Austin's car you were pregnant" Cassandra froze. Ernest looked at her trying to read her but she remained frozen. 

"Our conversation ends" She told him coldly before rushing out as fast as she could. He did not chase after her. Ronald  just looked at the door shocked at her reaction. 

***********

Cassandra rushed out as fast as she could. Her body shakes with tremors. Suffocation feeling choked her. She needs to get as far away from him. 

Those horrifying days where she feels like dying from hunger to the point she did some stupid stuffs. Spend time in jail. How could she have fed another person? No one was ready to hire a young distorted girl with criminal records. She was a wreck. Having food three times a day has become a luxury for her at that time. Tears streamed down her eyes.

Cassandra was ashamed of herself. She jumped in front of the car knowing very well she was pregnant. She did not want the baby. She fell down on the side sobbing. And she knows she can never be pregnant because of that. 

When Cassandra reached his house she felt emotionally drained. Taking a deep breath she entered and walked straight for her room. She freshens up before going to bed. She needs to take her medicines. She tried to fall asleep. But nothing is working at this moment. She gets out of her room, going to the kitchen.

"You are early" Cassandra almost jumped seeing him.

"Yeah! I finished early" She nodded her head, her eyes trailed on the oven. She was cooking pasta and trying  to keep her mind off any absurd thoughts.He looked here and there before settling down on the tool.

There were those awkward silences. Coltrane sighed, opening his mouth to say something or ask what was going on in her mind. When did it become like this between them. He failed to notice for a long time.

There was never silence between them. No the truth was she always has something to say and he will just return those with comments. But he noticed that she basically does not speak at all. Only greet him when necessary.

The maid was awkward around her. Why?

She is too friendly for them to feel this stuff around her. Or was that in the past?

"Would you like to eat out?" Coltrane asked her.

"No" her answer was one word.

"Why?" He asked, trying to continue for some reason he wanted her to talk. 

"I already cooked" 

"So, what? We could eat it now and have dinner later" Coltrane reasoned with her.

"I have to going back to the cafe"

"Why?" Coltrane was confused, once she said about work but she never mentioned it again.

Cassandra served him a plate of pasta with cheese. He looked down at the food on his hand and then at her.

"I wanted to be prepared when you decided to throw me out" She said mockingly.

"I would never do that" Coltrane blurted out looking at her. Cassandra smiled at him. Her smile was hiding many things. It's scary how much a smile can hide things.

They ate silently. He looked at her from time to time. His eyes wandered to her plate. She was not eating much he noticed for the first time since they started eating together.

"You should eat more" Cassandra looked up at him surprised then nodded her head before continuing to eat her food.

He sighed before getting up and putting his plate on the dishwasher.

Coltrane sighed and took a deep breath, "I need to talk to you about something" he told her coldly.

"Me too" Cassandra said she bends to tell him that she is moving out,  various thoughts were going through her head but what he said after that put a full stop to her thoughts.

*************

Somewhere else,

"What are you doing here?" The man looked at the woman shocked, she is still beautiful even though it's been 20 years since he last saw her.

"I heard that you come back," Carson said.

"I want to meet my daughter" Cassandra said a bit awkwardly..

"It's been 25 years. Do you think she will forgive you or talk to you as a matter of fact?" Carson asked her.

"No, but I at least want to apologize to her '' Cassandra said her eyes held something Carson did not understand but those tears falling were falling nonstop.

"But what were you doing here?" Cassandra asked him as he was standing right outside of her hotel room. Carson looked down for the first time she saw him defeated.

"I am sorry, I was never a good father to her. I never take care of her. I ......" he sighed 

"I was far worse than you. I left her when she needed me the most. What kind of mother am I?" Casandra cried.

Both of them know what they did was wrong. But will she forgive them? They wondered.

Do they deserve forgiveness?

"Where is she?" Cassandra asked.

"She is staying with Coltrane," Carson told her. She stared at him.

"Catherine was supposed to marry him" She looked at him shocked.

"She ran away from the wedding" Carson looked away.

"And you let my daughter marry him," Cassandra gasped.

"How dare you?" She glared at him through tears.

" I don't know" 

"That does not mean anything," Cassandra said. Now she knows why that young man was angry. He said something about replacement. 

"I want to see her right now" Cassandra glared at him, something crunching in her stomach. She does not want to meet her daughter, not even a bit.

Carson slowly nodded his head, sighing at their fate.

****************

Thank you reading dear readers. Though be ready for an emotional rollercoaster ride in the next chapter.

Do share your thoughts and comment.

Until next time.

Ignore the next part it just that I want a reminder when I actually write this for the first time.

(Hello lovelies another chapter in September 2019...

Do comment and share your thoughts. Next chapter will be a bit late due to holidays. I am going home after 8 months. I will spend time with my family. But after that I will update frequently. Sorry for the inconvenience.)